Non-Sequiturs: 05.27.15

* You down with R.B.G.? Yeah, you know me! Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore wants SCOTUS Justices Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Elena Kagan to be impeached for having performed same-sex marriage ceremonies. Haters gonna hate. [Huffington Post] * Here's a jury duty chart of those you'll be forced to sit next to, from the "idiot who treats the Jury Foreman selection like a presidential campaign" to the "elderly woman who compares everything to an episode of 'Matlock' she once saw." [Mandatory] * It turns out that the state trooper who failed to do anything about Josh Duggar's criminal sexual activity with a minor and allowed the statute of limitations to run had a penchant for child porn. According to court records, this guy is... pretty damn disgusting. [Jezebel] * "May I please have some of that money you've got under the counter there, miss?" Are you really robbing a bank if you acted like a Boy Scout, asked nicely for money, and then received it -- to the tune of $28,000? Kevin Underhill doesn't think so. [Lowering the Bar] * If you've never seen a Dealbreaker dramatic reading before, then here's your sneak peek. Watch "the greatest intern Wall Street has ever seen" invite everyone and their mother to a party via company email, and then fail in the most epic sense of the word. [Dealbreaker]

* You down with R.B.G.? Yeah, you know me! Alabama Chief Justice Roy Moore wants SCOTUS Justices Ruth Bader Ginsburg and Elena Kagan to be impeached for having performed same-sex marriage ceremonies. Haters gonna hate. [Huffington Post]

* Here’s a jury duty chart of those you’ll be forced to sit next to, from the “idiot who treats the Jury Foreman selection like a presidential campaign” to the “elderly woman who compares everything to an episode of ‘Matlock’ she once saw.” [Mandatory]

* It turns out that the state trooper who failed to do anything about Josh Duggar’s criminal sexual activity with a minor and allowed the statute of limitations to run had a penchant for child porn. According to court records, this guy is… pretty damn disgusting. [Jezebel]

* “May I please have some of that money you’ve got under the counter there, miss?” Are you really robbing a bank if you acted like a Boy Scout, asked nicely for money, and then received it — to the tune of $28,000? Kevin Underhill doesn’t think so. [Lowering the Bar]

* If you’ve never seen a Dealbreaker dramatic reading before, then here’s your sneak peek. Watch “the greatest intern Wall Street has ever seen” invite everyone and their mother to a party via company email, and then fail in the most epic sense of the word. [Dealbreaker]

Sponsored