Beyond Biglaw: Know Your Game
Taking a few moments to reflect on what values you personally hold dear, and how well you are playing “your game,” is something that is a worthwhile exercise at any point in time.
When you grow up in New York City, there is a good chance your sport of choice will be basketball, and in particular, “street ball” on an outdoor, concrete court. Despite the patches of green here and there in the city, most kids play sports at the neighborhood park, or in the concrete “backyards” that can be found in residential neighborhoods. In other words, it is not the suburbs, with their manicured soccer pitches, or football fields. In New York City, “let’s go play ball” equals “let’s go outside and play some basketball.” Basketball, of course, is a game for the young and the athletic, with its emphasis on physicality and fitness.
At the same time, basketball is a quintessential team game, and even pickup games are more fun when you have teammates with whom you have played before. Knowing when someone will cut towards the basket, or where they prefer to shoot from, not only makes you a better teammate, but also increases your odds of victory. One of the pleasures of summer is my weekly Sunday morning full-court pickup game at a friend’s house. Are the games as fast-paced as those we played a decade ago? Of course not. But they are perhaps more enjoyable now, as we make up with guile what we have lost in athleticism. Because even when you think you are aging well, the simple truth is that your physical skills erode over time.
Like all sports, basketball can be a cruel game, since it lays bare just how much your athletic ability has declined over time. Anyone who has played knows what I am talking about. Your mind tells you to get to a certain spot, and you think you are there, only to realize that you are actually a step away. There is a saving grace, however, especially if you are able to focus on those things that you are still able to do on the court, rather than becoming dispirited by the things you can’t. In short, you adapt. Doing so is the key to longevity on the basketball court. Experience teaches you that you are better off sticking with the things you can continue to do well, rather than wasting precious energy flailing at the things you now struggle with.
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Learning to live with your limitations is something that is difficult to do. Even as a kid, I always assumed that with enough practice, I would be able to dunk a basketball. Palming the ball was not the problem, as I can do so with both hands, and easily with my right hand — even while on the move. Jumping high enough? That was always the issue. The highest I ever got was at my physical peak, right about the age of 20. At that point I could dunk a tennis ball, but it became clear that I would never be able to dunk a real ball — other than in the pool, or on a Jordan Jammer. Of course, not being able to dunk was the least of my limitations on the basketball court.
With time, however, comes acceptance. I have come to appreciate all the great memories that playing basketball has given me, even as I know that my best days on the court are long gone. But now I get to work with my children, and try to pass along the things I have learned from my coaches, teammates, and friends. And I know that I will continue to play for as long as I can, even if my game is now limited to shooting three-pointers from the left wing, or trying to work a jump hook from the right block against smaller defenders.
Most importantly, age and experience have taught me the folly of trying to model my game on that of others, at the expense of focusing on those things that fit my physical abilities. Yes, you can always learn from how someone else plays the game. But it is a mistake to think that the key to success is copying those things that “successful” players do when they are on the court. Just as it is a mistake to spend too much time focusing on the things that you are not “built to do” at the expense of perfecting those things that you can do well.
Life is not meant to be fair, nor are we entitled to success at any endeavor. We are all born with different abilities, in different sets of personal circumstances. Anyone reading this, however, has likely managed to overcome some challenges in getting to where they are in life. It is just as likely that many people reading this are not satisfied with where they are. That is fine, because as long as there is another day ahead of us, we have the ability to continue moving forward. Everything I wrote about basketball, in terms of learning to accept your limitations, while never failing to continue developing your strengths and learning from your experiences, is just as true about our careers as lawyers, and for that matter, our lives.
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For some, like myself, this time of the year is one that is replete with introspection — about the year that was and the year to come. There are no guarantees for anyone, but we can all at least strive to be true to ourselves, and do our best to put ourselves into a position to succeed, ideally while contributing to the success of others as well. What that entails will be different for everyone. Just as everyone will have a different definition of success. But taking a few moments to reflect on what values you personally hold dear, and how well you are playing “your game,” is something that is a worthwhile exercise at any point in time. You learn a lot on the basketball court, but the main lesson is the importance of awareness — of yourself, your teammates, and the game situation you find yourself at any given time. Play your best, and know your game. It is the start of a new season, with all of its promise.
Gaston Kroub lives in Brooklyn and is a founding partner of Kroub, Silbersher & Kolmykov PLLC, an intellectual property litigation boutique. The firm’s practice focuses on intellectual property litigation and related counseling, with a strong focus on patent matters. You can reach him at gkroub@kskiplaw.com or follow him on Twitter: @gkroub.