Health Care / Medicine

2 Keys For Negotiating Your Career Transitions

Start making space for that nagging voice inside of you. After all, life is short and the saddest tragedy might be to live in misery knowing you didn’t fulfill your potential.

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Jeena Cho

Jeena Cho

I love working with lawyers who are ready to take the leap and make a shift. It’s a journey I’m very familiar with, and in this post, I’d like to talk about the importance of listening to that nagging voice inside.

I remember the first time I heard that nagging voice inside of my head that said, “This job, this work you’re doing, this isn’t right for you.” Instead of listening, I went into denial mode. I told myself to stop being ungrateful, that this is what I really wanted.

Throughout my career, I’ve heard that nagging voice repeatedly, that nudge which comes from someplace deep within that gently guides me so that I can align my life’s work with a deeper sense of mission and purpose.

Last year, that nagging voice came up with this crazy idea to go on a seven-week road trip. I gave talks in 11 cities and it was such an amazing experience.

It was delightful to meet many lawyers who read my column. (That’s you!) We shared coffee, meals, and had lots of deeply meaningful conversations on how to practice law in a way that felt authentic to our true selves, with mindfulness, and with compassion. We shared laughters, tears, and I found a community of lawyers who shared a common vision for a better law practice.

At the end of that trip, the nagging voice chirped up again and said, “You should visit every single one of the 100 largest U.S. cities!” Rather than immediately dismiss it as a ridiculous idea, I made space for it.

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Over the past eight months, this idea started to develop a much stronger pull. This week, I decided to make this tour a reality.

A journey like this I’ve learned requires the efforts of many. So, if you’re interested in joining the mission of making our profession better through mindfulness and meditation, please connect with me. The details for this crazy 100-city trip are here.

Commit To The Process, Connect With Purpose: Let Go Of The Outcome

The important lesson I learned along the way is to be committed to the process and deeply connect with the purpose — and let go of the outcome. Let me use an example to explain. Three years ago, that nagging voice said, “You should apply to lead a lawyer’s retreat at Esalen Institute.” I spent weeks fussing over every single detail of the application and I made sure it was perfect. It’s a competitive process and Esalen receives far more applications than space permits. Ultimately, my application was rejected. I was, of course, disappointed.

The following year, I attended a women’s luncheon at the Wisdom 2.0 conference. The woman who sat down next to me was the executive director of Esalen.

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I excitedly told her about The Anxious Lawyer book I was writing, all the mindfulness workshops for lawyers I was offering, all the coaching, and she, too, was enthusiastic about my work. She gave me her business card and asked me to forward the application directly to her. A month later, my application was accepted and I’ll be leading the first attorney-only retreat at Esalen next week.

You see, I was committed to the process — I set an intention to lead a retreat at Esalen. The purpose was to serve the legal community. I showed up, I did everything within my power to achieve that end goal but I didn’t gauge success or failure based on whether my application was accepted. In other words, I let go of what I cannot control — the outcome.

If you think about it, a lot of life is like this. You can give your 110% preparing for a hearing or a trial, but the ultimate outcome as to who wins or loses isn’t up to you. So, the goal is to show up, do your absolute best, and not get attached to the outcome (which, admittedly, is difficult). However, going through life, trying to control every aspect of what is ultimately beyond your control, is crazy-making and futile.

Making Space For That Nagging Voice

People often ask me how I started working with lawyers on using mindfulness and meditation to cultivate a more joyful and satisfying law practice. The simple answer is that instead of suppressing, ignoring, and denying that nagging voice, I started giving her space. I decided just as all the other thoughts that go through my head, this particular chain of thoughts was just as valuable and legitimate.

I remember talking to the executive editor at the ABA Publishing a few years ago when he asked the question that I was not expecting, “Do you have a book proposal for me?” To my surprise, the answer that flew out of my mouth was, “Yes! I want to write a book on how lawyers can use mindfulness and meditation for a better law practice.” As the words came out of my mouth, I remember my inner critic screaming, “WHAT??? Don’t say that!!! He’s going to laugh at you.” Of course, he didn’t, and two years later, the book is finally here!

Often, it’s hard to navigate all these different, conflicting thoughts and we need equanimity to distill and sort through them. Which one is your “true self,” and which one is based on fear?

So, my dear reader, I invite you to start making space for that nagging voice inside of you. After all, life is short and the saddest tragedy might be to live in misery knowing you didn’t fulfill your potential. As my friend Will Meyerhofer says, “life is a brief opportunity for joy” (affiliate link).

Jeena Cho is the author of the upcoming American Bar Association book, The Anxious Lawyer: An 8-Week Guide to a Happier, Saner Law Practice Using Meditation (affiliate link). She offers coaching, and workshops on using mindfulness for cultivating a more balanced life, stress management, and sustainable law practice. Connect via Twitter @jeena_cho or email smile@theanxiouslawyer.com.

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