Legal Ethics

Brilliant New DUI Defense: Lawyer Eats Breathalyzer Report

Crazy lawyer swallows evidence to clear client.

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fiascoThat’s one way to clear a client! Closed circuit cameras caught an unnamed lawyer in Russia literally eating a police report in a bid to get his client off the hook. Now that’s what I call zealous representation!

I hear Clarence Darrow once tried something similar. Or maybe that was Mac from It’s Always Sunny?

Yahoo has the details:

The lawyer, who has not been named, eats a breathalyser report which revealed the level of alcohol in the blood of his client, who was accused of causing an accident while drink driving.

The lawyer had been left alone with the document in the office of a local judge.

Damning evidence is known to chew up even the best lawyers. But, to borrow from Yakov Smirnoff, “In former Soviet Russia, lawyer eats evidence!”

Not to jump to stereotypes, but exactly how much alcohol gets a guy pulled over in Russia? I mean, they say their legal limit is a draconian .02, and apparently they used to put up signs that literally said, “We are tired of warning you. Don’t f**king drink & drive.” But then, stuff like this happens there on the reg:

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Well, whatever this client was facing, it must have been significant enough to entice his lawyer to chow down on some breathalyzer report. On the other hand, when “meat jello” is a national delicacy — yes, that’s a real thing — maybe paper is a delightful treat.

But a costly one it turns out — he now faces a roughly $2900 fine or two years in prison.

I hope this guy enjoys the flavor of videotape!

Lawyer Faces Jail After Being Caught EATING Crucial Piece Of Evidence Against Client [Yahoo! News]

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