Law School Announces Mumps Outbreak

Yes, that disease you were vaccinated against and completely forgot about.

MumpsA lot can go wrong during finals — from scheming study groups, to crashing software nuking your exam — but one catastrophe you may not have counted on is an epidemic of the mumps.

Yes, that disease you were vaccinated against and completely forgot about.

It seems that the mumps is spreading across college campuses like the clap used to. At Harvard, 41 diagnosed cases in a month and a half have folks worried about graduation ceremonies (featuring Steven Spielberg). You’ve heard about Harvard grads getting big heads, but this is ridiculous.

Harvard isn’t the only school suffering the bug, and now a law school has alerted its students to mumps on campus.

The University of Illinois College of Law informed students of a diagnosed mumps case. According to tipsters, the students are “freaking out.” Which is understandable since a concentrated population of neurotics stepping into the most stressful week of their year just learned that an infectious disease causing painful swelling and occasionally “infections of the covering of the brain” and “painful testicular swelling” — *shifts uncomfortably in seat* — was spotted loitering around campus.

In this case, we’re here to assure the Illini students that they’re most likely going to get through this unscathed — assuming they aren’t Jenny McCarthy acolytes. When we contacted the school for details, we learned that the outbreak was extremely limited, and every student can take steps now to further reduce their risk:

One law student tested positive for mumps after he was no longer contagious. We followed and will continue to follow University of Illinois, Champaign-Urbana Public Health District, and Illinois Department of Public Health guidelines—since August, they have encouraged and are offering MMR boosters to all students, faculty, and staff at no cost. We are taking finals into account, but at this time, we have not heard about any other possible cases that would necessitate further steps.

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Some may wonder how anything like this happens in a world of vaccinations — anti-vaxxers notwithstanding. Well, it turns out the mumps vaccine isn’t actually the most effective vaccine out there. The efficacy rate for the mumps vaccine at its best is only about 78 percent for the first dose, and 88 percent on the second. Not that this diminishes the importance of getting a vaccine — if anything, this underscores the importance of getting everyone their proper second dose — but it’s why the mumps hasn’t gone the way of smallpox.

So if you aren’t afflicted: wash your hands, cover your mouth, and go get your vaccinations. If you are feeling any symptoms — hopefully not the “painful testicular swelling” — don’t go to class! Notify the school and they’ll work something out.

Do your best to make sure this is the only mumps post Above the Law has to write this year.

Mumps Outbreak at Harvard Threatens Graduation [NBC News]
No Harvard’s Mumps Outbreak Doesn’t Mean Vaccines Don’t Work [Wired]

Earlier: The Crazy: How Your Nastiness During Law School Finals Will Impact Your Life As A Lawyer
Law School Exam Website Crashes During Finals

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Joe Patrice is an editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news.