Books, Law Schools

Standard Of Review: Satire Novel 'The Curve' Mocks The Worst Law School Ever

With a novel like this, it is difficult to provide much analysis besides “this book is really funny, and you should read it.”

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The Curve Image (1)Law school: good investment or bad investment? That is the calculus that thousands of students have to make every year: deciding whether or not to go deep into debt for the opportunity to spend three years reading arcane case law in the hope of possibly obtaining a legal job (and, for those characters on How To Get Away With Murder, the opportunity to commit multiple homicides with classmates). Because it is such a questionable investment, law school is thus ripe for satire, and that is exactly what authors Jeremy Blachman and Cameron Stracher have done in their new novel, The Curve, which tells the story of the fictional Manhattan Law School, possibly the most inept school in the country. The Curve is both creative and extremely funny, and is worth reading for any law student or prospective law student.

Manhattan Law School (“MLS,” not to be confused with Major League Soccer, though learning law from Frank Lampard and Clint Dempsey would probably be more effective than actually attending MLS) is not actually in Manhattan (similar to the fact that Manhattan College is actually in the Bronx), but instead sits on the unglamorous banks of the Gowanus Canal is Brooklyn. MLS is barely functional, home to lazy students with no job prospects. The MLS professors are underpaid and are unmotivated and the dean of the law school is essentially senile. In short, MLS is the kind of law school that probably should not exist but inevitably does exist in order to charge six figures of tuition to broke twenty-somethings.

As the novel opens, Professor Adam Wright is beginning his first year teaching torts at MLS. Adam has given up a lucrative firm job at Cranberry, Boggs & Pickel LLP (“CBP”) to follow his dream of being a professor, but is soon put off by the dilapidated facilities and the uninterested students. And even though he has given up the firm life, he is beholden to Howell Goldreckt, a prominent CBP partner and the reason Adam got the job in the first place. Howell has a crush on extremely attractive and unusually smart MLS student Ann Marie, and so he forces Adam to steer her towards CBP. The only saving grace of Adam’s job is that he soon begins a romantic relationship with Laura Stapleton, a civil procedure professor who is MLS’s only star faculty member. However, Adam soon learns about a secretive and extremely unethical practice at MLS that attempts to help the students and faculty alike.

As with any good satire, The Curve is consistently funny. Blachman and Stracher have a delightful time constantly poking fun at virtually every aspect of law school and the legal industry. As the novel opens, for example, Blachman and Stracher describe Wright’s first day of class, as the students are all checking their fantasy sports teams or browsing Tinder instead of paying attention. After Wright asks an oblivious student to state of the facts of Palsgraf v. Long Island Railroad Co., the other students gasp, not because one of their classmates is singled out, but because the school’s WiFi went out for a brief moment.

Instead of just listing funny jokes from the novel (which I could definitely do), I focus on Blachman and Stracher’s use of humor to bring attention to real issues in the legal industry, such as law schools whose job numbers are pitifully low. Similar to MLS, these law schools take thousands and thousands of dollars from unsuspecting students by dangling the possibility of a real job as an attorney, when in reality many of those students will graduate with six figures of debt and little prospect for employment. Further, even the lucky few that do manage to obtain firm jobs end up working for the likes of Howell, a nasty partner with a penchant for screaming and sexual harassment. And the professors — many of whom went into academia after leaving or turning down lucrative firm jobs — are paid a pittance compared to their private sector colleagues. Blachman and Stracher address these issues head on and in an extremely entertaining way.

While the narrative itself is excellent, the best aspect of The Curve is the graphics. Each chapter opens with a picture of something related to law school or lawyering, such as an MLS personal statement, a chain of emails to a professor, an MLS job board, a New York Magazine review of MLS’s local bar, Howell’s Wikipedia page, and a subpar student’s torts exam. Each graphic is hilarious and is an extremely creative way to convey the novel’s satire.

With a novel like this, it is difficult to provide much analysis besides “this book is really funny, and you should read it.” So, this book is really funny, and you should read it. And I cannot wait to read the next novel about a fictional law school with a soccer-related name — English Premier Law? The Bundeslawga?

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(Disclosure: I received a review copy of this book.)

Harry Graff is a litigation associate at a firm, but he spends days wishing that he was writing about film, television, literature, and pop culture instead of writing briefs. If there is a law-related movie, television show, book, or any other form of media that you would like Harry Graff to discuss, he can be reached at harrygraff19@gmail.com. Be sure to follow Harry Graff on Twitter at @harrygraff19.

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