Politics

The Last Word On Chris Christie's Wacky Public Show Trial

Whose speech was dumber: Clint Eastwood's or Chris Christie's?

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THIS guy.

THIS guy.

Say what you will about Clint Eastwood’s 2012 antics, at least his bizarre trial in absentia of Barack Obama was lighthearted and cute in a “who stole Clint’s meds?” sort of way. Chris Christie’s bizarre “prosecution” (did you know Christie was once a prosecutor?) of Hillary Clinton had a much more unsettling feel.

Yes, Christie’s prosecutorial (seriously, he never mentions this!) chops were on full display, and they fell somewhere between P.T. Barnum and King Joffrey. That’s why this was so unsettling. Eastwood framed his routine from the start as a celebrity roast, while future Attorney General Christie’s played as a preview of a courtroom showdown to come. If playing to the base instincts of the mob is the dress rehearsal for the prosecutions of the next four years, that’s off-putting. Jesus, give us Ken Starr back!

Actually, don’t, but for other reasons.

And The Onion captured this all succinctly. Their running commentary of convention speeches is downright genius and you should watch the whole video of Christie highlights, but this screencap says it all:

Christie

Yeah. It can’t.

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Joe Patrice is an editor at Above the Law and co-host of Thinking Like A Lawyer. Feel free to email any tips, questions, or comments. Follow him on Twitter if you’re interested in law, politics, and a healthy dose of college sports news.

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