Diblings, Duncles, And Triplings… Oh My!

Do you know the meanings of these newfangled terms?

triplets triple three babies kidsAdvances in assisted reproductive technology have made the dream of a child possible for thousands of parents-to-be. But this positive change has also given rise to ethical and legal complications, as well as a whole new way of looking at familial relationships. And with this new reality comes new language. Today, we look at a few of the new words that have emerged in the glossary of terms for families formed or expanded using assisted reproductive technology.

Disclaimer: None of these words appear in an official dictionary (yet!) and although I have heard clients use them, I can’t promise that they have spread through the general population’s lexicon.

Diblings. “Dibling” is the combination of “donor” and “sibling.” As you probably saw in the Vince Vaughn blockbuster The Delivery Man, or the MTV series Cryogeneration, some men donate a lot of sperm. That sperm may be used by numerous different women, and the term “Dibling” refers to a donor-conceived person’s half-sibling, related through a genetic donor egg or donor sperm parent.

Thanks to websites like the Donor Sibling Registry, some donor-conceived children are finding multiple half-siblings out there, and some even finding themselves with a hundred or more diblings! And, of course, there is the sperm donor out there who claims to have sired over 800 children. It kind of makes you want to DNA test all future romantic interests — no one wants to accidently date their dibling!

Duncles.  The term “Duncle” is a combination of the terms “donor” and “uncle.” No, it has nothing to do with the new Dunkin Donuts ad campaign. Instead, the term refers to known donors who are used by individuals or couples who don’t go through the standard process of obtaining sperm from a sperm bank. Although a sperm bank is an option for those missing the viable sperm component in their reproductive recipe, many people choose to turn to a known donor.

Some sperm donors have proven to be interesting characters. But I have written before about some of the advantages of a known donor versus an anonymous donor through a sperm bank. Aside from the fact that sperm banks don’t warrant the truthfulness of their [cough] depositors—which means later finding out that the brilliant PhD donor was really a felon college drop-out—another advantage of a known donor is that many people want the genetic father to have some involvement in the child’s life, but not as close a relationship as a father. Thus, the term “Duncle” has emerged. The idea is that the donor wants to act as more of an uncle figure to the child, and the parents and child fondly call this individual the child’s “duncle.” Of course, it only makes sense that there could also be “daunts” (egg donors acting in a donor “aunt” capacity to the child), but I haven’t heard anyone use this. (Yet! Go forth, my friends, make Daunts happen.)

Surrobaby.  This one is easy enough to guess the meaning: a baby born via surrogacy. A woman acting as a gestational carrier is most likely to use this when referring to the baby she carried for someone else. It is not her baby, it’s her surrobaby.

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Triplings. This term is a splice of the familiar words “triplets” and “siblings.” This one is a little more complicated, but came up in a recent case out of Mexico. There, the intended fathers had embryos created at the same time (all children resulting from these embryos are full genetic siblings to each other). Then the parents-to-be chose two surrogates to have embryos transferred to them and to carry to birth their children. At the same time. In the Mexico case, one carrier gave birth to one child, and the second carrier gave birth to twins. The three surrobabies (see what I did there?) were full genetic siblings, born within days of each other, but borne by different women. While they may not be either conventional “triplets” or “siblings,” the fathers fondly refer to them as “triplings.”

As our world and families change, the language that we use to refer to our families, chosen or genetic, is sure to continue to evolve. Good luck keeping up, Oxford Dictionary!


Ellen TrachmanEllen Trachman is the Managing Attorney of Trachman Law Center, LLC, a Denver-based law firm specializing in assisted reproductive technology law, adoption, and estate planning, and Co-Director of Colorado Surrogacy, LLC, a surrogacy matching and support agency. You can reach her at babies@abovethelaw.com.

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