Law Students

3 Times Your Millennial Law Students Weirded You Out By Mistake

That time I had to ask my student not to put me on Snapchat during class...

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Ed. Note: Welcome our newest columnist, Kerriann Stout. She’s an assistant director of a law school academic success program, and private bar exam tutor trapped between being a full blown millennial and the rigid constraints of legal academia.

I am a rare mythical creature. No, not big foot. I am a millennial law professor. There are truly only a few of us. Sure, you find a Gen Xer every now and then, but an authentic millennial law professor is a rare find. In fact, if you sat in a law school faculty meeting, you might think we don’t exist at all. I’ve heard millennials described as lazy, entitled, and unprofessional by my colleagues. While I should be downright offended by these statements, the truth is, sometimes I feel the same way. I relate to the frustrations of my colleagues but also understand the intentions of my students. My life is complicated.

Millennials love being connected to people and are used to being able to receive instant feedback on everything. For instance, many of them have a feeling of anxiety when they are disconnected for a two-hour class. This is not only a reflection of the current law student, but the current lawyer. Law students’ constant connection is just the first step to becoming a constantly connected attorney. Whether this is a healthy or practical way to live life or practice law is an article for another day. When it comes to law students, sometimes in the quest to find that connection and feedback, they appear disrespectful or unprofessional when perhaps they are just misunderstood.

I started teaching law students at age 27. Three years later, (at an age that shall not be mentioned) my biggest struggle remains managing the interpersonal relationships I have with my students. I’ve been blessed with a youthful face (read: I break out a lot) and most of the time, my students think I’m younger than I am.

The majority of my students are within five years of my age. On a daily basis, I face the challenge of teaching my peers. Easily, they are people I could have met out at a bar or in a college seminar. But, that is not how we met. I am the teacher, and they are the students. As a result, the relationship can be difficult to navigate for both of us.

For the students, it can be hard to see me as “the professor.” I use the same social media apps, I get their pop culture references, and we buy clothes from the same stores. I am less intimidating, and it is very easy for them to blur the lines. For me, I thought when I became a law professor, this big, magical maturing process would occur. But, it didn’t. I still look young. I still feel young. However, I still have to command the respect of a room full of adult students.

All of this can lead to some pretty bizarre conversations. Perhaps you’ve also found yourself in one of these weird, I mean interesting, situations with your millennial law students, interns or associates. Well, if you haven’t yet, you probably will soon. Read on to learn about three especially troubling times I have faced an awkward millennial showdown and how I managed to live to tell the tale. Hopefully, these will help prepare you for your next millennial interaction.

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1- They put your picture on Snapchat

It was 8:29 on a Tuesday morning. I had just stumbled into my classroom to teach my 8:30 class. I was nearly late, because it was snowing. Again. Hair barely dried. Make up hastily applied. I was also severely under caffeinated. To say I was not on top of my game is putting it lightly.

Somehow, I got it together and started class. There I was, standing at the front of the room extolling the virtues of the IRAC method, when I noticed that one of my students had her phone up as if she were taking a photo. I stopped mid-sentence and the following conversation ensued:

Me: “Did you just take my picture?”

Student: “No, I was putting something on Snapchat.”

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Me: “Did you just put ME on Snapchat?”

Student: “Yes, I wanted to show my friends at [other law school] my favorite professor.”

Me (equal parts flustered and flattered): “Well, okay…. ummm…maybe let’s just put the phone away now…”

I may be a millennial, but I was late to the Snapchat game. If you are unfamiliar, Snapchat is a social media application where people can share photos and videos that disappear every 24 hours. It is extremely popular these days.

You probably have a bunch of thoughts on this situation. I know I did.  Most of them were questions. Why did you have your phone out in class? Why are you taking my picture? Why are you posting it anywhere without my permission? WHY AREN’T YOU LISTENING TO ME?

Let’s put those pressing questions aside for a moment and look at this from the student’s perspective. She did not mean to offend me or invade my privacy. In fact, she thought she was doing something positive. I’m a role model to her, and she wanted to share that with her friends. She didn’t know I was unfamiliar with Snapchat and that it wasn’t a part of my day-to-day life.

Now, do I think I think she should be taking my picture in class or without my permission? No. However, I truly believe she did not have any ill-will or disrespectful intention and, to me at least, that matters. Lesson #1: state the phone and recording policy and expectations clearly on the first day of class.

2- They friend requested you on Facebook

This one happens to me frequently. Facebook is a cross-generational social media platform. However, millennials have a special relationship with Facebook. The bond is particularly strong with younger millennials, who genuinely don’t remember life without Facebook. Imagine their horror when I tell them “back in my day you had to have a college email address to get a Facebook account?”

Millennials are a social group. We like to connect, and we love to do it online. It doesn’t faze us at all to freely share our lives with each other. That is all fine and well, but that doesn’t mean I want my students to see my #tacotuesday pictures or that selfie-fest I took with my dog last week. However, these thoughts don’t even occur to them.

This is one of those situations where no one is wrong. They aren’t really “wrong” for friending me and I am not wrong for not wanting to accept their request! I try not to get upset with the student or pass judgment on, well, their judgment. Lesson #2: let the friend request pend until the student is out of my class or has graduated.

3- They asked for your cell phone number

Student: “Hey Prof. Stout, I hand wrote my practice question and took a picture of it. Can I text it to you?”

Me: “No. No, you cannot.”

This student wasn’t trying to “get my digits” or obtain special access to me. He just wanted to give me his assignment without the hassle of taking out his computer, uploading the photo, and e-mailing it to me. I get it. Everyone texts everyone else all the time. It is a simple, fast means of communication.

However, this one has an easy answer for me. As a general rule, sharing my cell phone number is a hard no. I’ve had the same phone number for 18 years and in the hands of the wrong student it could be ruined. This is my personal preference, as I know some professors who put their cell phone number on their syllabus! Lesson #3: Don’t put your cell phone number on your syllabus if that number is also listed on your bank account, your electric bill, your credit card statement, and your car insurance.

The point is, what can come across as disrespectful and boundary crossing to professors may simply be how millennials communicate with each other. Maybe that is part of the problem with the law school system. We train our students to enter the world of law as we know it today or knew it yesterday. But, they aren’t merely entering our world they are changing it. They will be serving millennial clients, appearing before millennial judges, and working with millennial colleagues. One day the “millennial way” will be THE way.

We don’t have to offer students an all access pass to our lives. But, maybe, just maybe, instead of immediately becoming frustrated when they “over step” or act too casual, we can try to see things from their perspective and create teachable moments. I don’t have a magic potion or the perfect answer. It might be easier said than done. I’ll keep you posted.

Kerriann Stout is a millennial law school professor and founder of Vinco (a bar exam coaching company) who is generationally trapped between her students and colleagues. Kerriann has helped hundreds of students survive law school and the bar exam with less stress and more confidence. She lives, works, and writes in the northeast. You can reach her by email at info@vincoprep.com.

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