Juggalo Law
Posts by Juggalo Law
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Crime, Litigators, Murder, Trials
People Email Me Things
About a month ago, our writer Juggalo Law levied some "thoughtful criticisms" against Jose Baez, suggesting that Baez may have been in over his head on the Casey Anthony case. But after the verdict was in, Juggalo received a missive worthy of being read from "Attorney Baez." Satire sure is fun. -
Golf, Kids, Sports
Milk, Milk, Lemonade, Around The Corner...
When I was a little kid, my cousin and I set up a produce stand in front of my grandparents’ house. Splayed out on an uneven card table, we offered a variety of bruised, battered, and misshapen produce. From an oblong cantaloupe to a nicked-up watermelon, our “stand” carried the bounty of my grandfather’s patch […] 
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Crime, Litigators, Murder, Nancy Grace, Television, Trials
Fear And Loathing, The Squeakquel
I knew the moment would come when I’d have to watch a full hour of Nancy Grace and I was not looking forward to it. The daytime anchors and hosts had been mere fluffers for Nancy Grace’s performance at night and there were multiple teases to her show throughout the day. For Nancy Grace is […]
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Crime, Litigators, Murder, Nancy Grace, Television, Trials
Fear And Loathing On Headline News
On Sunday night, I was sitting on my couch eating Chicken McNuggets®, when Lat Skyped™ me. The following is a faithful transcript of our conversation. Lat: Hey Juggs, I’ve got an assignment for you. Wait, why aren’t you wearing a shirt? Me: Why are you wearing a top hat? L: Touché. Listen, I have an […] -
Crime, Lawyer of the Day, Litigators, Murder, Trials
Lawyer of the Day: Jose Baez, Counsel to Casey Anthony
Anyone who is a lawyer knows that sinking feeling. The feeling that comes when someone else finds out you’re a lawyer and starts telling you about whatever garden-variety awfulness has visited their lives. They prattle on about who knows what, because you’ve tuned out. But they keep going and the inevitable finally arrives at the […] -
Anna Nicole Smith, Celebrities, Hotties, SCOTUS, Supreme Court
The Peculiarly American Anna Nicole Smith
During her short lifetime, Anna Nicole Smith managed to sell sex, jeans, weight-loss pills and, with her reality show, a sense of superiority to millions of Americans who could take some solace in the fact that they were not that messed up. She was voluptuous, then she was just plain fat, then she was voluptuous […] -
Andrew Sullivan, California, Health Care / Medicine, Jews, Kids, Politics, Religion, Weirdness
Circumcision, Anti-Semitism, and You
The phone’s been ringing off the hook here at the Circumcision Law Desk all weekend, so I apologize in advance if this post comes off sounding a bit distracted. Oftentimes, the intersection of foreskin and law is a lonely corridor filled with nothing but shattered dreams and crying babies. A screaming anti-semitism comes across the […] -
Morning Docket
Morning Docket: 06.03.11
* Barring a last-minute deal, John Edwards will be indicted today. Life can seem pretty unfair sometimes. This isn’t one of those times. [ABC News] * Civil rights groups have filed a class-action lawsuit against the state of Georgia over its new immigration law. These two have a history. [Reuters] * Outsourcing firms are creating […]
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Morning Docket
Morning Docket: 06.02.11
* Former Chicago Mayor Richard Daley is joining Katten Muchin Rosenman as “of counsel.” Which promises to be a boon to their snow-clearing, graft, and patronage practices. [Chicago Tribune] * South Carolina may be jumping on the E-verify train. Whatever, the sopapilla scene in Charleston was lame to begin with. [The State] * This article […]
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Morning Docket
Morning Docket: 06.01.11
* J’Accuse…! The S.E.C. has, so far, been operating on a Lone Frenchman theory in regard to mortgage securities fraud at Goldman Sachs. [New York Times] * This article suggests that the dumb question of the 21st century is “Is it legal?” I suggest the honor go to “F**king magnets, how do they work?” [CBS […]
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California, John Edwards, John Paul Stevens, Libraries / Librarians, Morning Docket, New Jersey, Prisons
Morning Docket: 05.31.11
* Opponents of “three strikes” hope that the SCOTUS decision requiring California to reduce its prison population by 33,000 inmates will help them to repeal three strikes. Four balls, standing eight count, and wicked googly are among sports terms vying to take its place. [San Diego Union Tribune] * A law firm librarian in New […]
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Morning Docket
Morning Docket: 05.30.11
Ed. note: Today we remember and thank those who have died in military service to our country. In honor of Memorial Day, Above the Law is on holiday (and we hope you are too). We will return to regularly scheduled programming tomorrow. * Can’t really improve on the Deadspin headline here. “Ric Flair Found In […]
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Abortion, Gay, Gay Marriage, Law Schools, Movies, Religion
Roe v. Wade v. Siskel v. Ebert
When Focus on the Family CEO Jim Daly recently conceded that opponents of gay marriage had “probably” lost in their efforts to convince young Americans that gay marriage is evil baloney, there was much celebration in circles that celebrate such things. I have it on good authority that Elie let out a big whoop upon […]
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Bernie Madoff, Morning Docket
Morning Docket: 05.20.11
* A former Ropes & Gray attorney caught up in the Galleon Group insider trading scandal, Brien Santarlas, testified yesterday that he was paid thousands of dollars for tips. Then, he was told “to dispose of the phone — break it in half, submerge it in water and put it in a garbage can.” He […]
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Morning Docket
Morning Docket: 05.19.11
* “Can’t fire me, cause I f**king quit.” Dominique Strauss-Kahn [BBC News] * “Can’t fire me, cause I f**king quit.” Manhattan prosecutor Karen Friedman Agnifilo [Bloomberg] * Rudy Giuliani elevated the perp walk to “an art form.” Reached for comment, Giuliani replied “9/11.” [Reuters] * Goodwin Liu needs seven Republicans to cross party lines in […]
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Morning Docket
Morning Docket: 05.18.11
* I was just asking myself, “What does Ben Stein think about the Dominique Strauss-Kahn case?” [American Spectator via Daily Intel] * The perp walk is illegal in France. It’s not clear from this article how the French view the crip walk. [Sacramento Bee] * Carl Icahn, the Blockbuster bankruptcy, insider-trading charges, and a golden […]
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Morning Docket
Morning Docket: 05.17.11
* Dominique Strauss-Kahn will go to Rikers for three or four years just to prove his point. [CNN] * A South Carolina jail is being investigated by the Justice Department for allowing its inmates to read only the Bible. Instead of a joke, how about you goofballs learn something and read this article that Christopher […]
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Morning Docket
Morning Docket: 05.16.11
* So you’re trying to tell me that a French dude came all the way to America to sexually assault one of OUR maids? That makes no sense. [BBC News] * Starting today, Chicago will be the site of a terror trial. Speaking of Chicago, did you guys see Taj Gibson’s dunk last night? Sweet […]
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Morning Docket
Morning Docket: 05.06.11
* A bunch of kids are suing the federal government and state governments over greenhouse gas emissions. Frankie says relax, nerds. [New York Times] * Challenges to Obamacare will get their first appellate hearing in Richmond, Virginia, next Tuesday. Classic states rights location. Classic. [USA Today] * For the second time, jurors in the Raj […]
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Eric Holder, Football, Health Care / Medicine, Morning Docket, Paul Clement, Sports, War on Terror
Morning Docket: 05.05.11
* DOMA dude Paul Clement filed his first brief as lead counsel for 26 states seeking to nullify Obamacare. In a land of socialist, freeloading, hippie queers, one man stands alone. [Atlanta Journal Constitution] * Actually, that’s not true — The Cooch has Clement’s back (twhs), Tweeting all the misspelled and hilarious punchlines that are […]
