Last week, we offered you this photo of Vice President Joe Biden at Syracuse University School of Law and asked you to give us your funniest caption suggestions. We then asked you to vote among ten finalists, noting that one of the finalists was not our pick. Guess which finalist won.
“Oh, no, I’m sorry … the government share of the pie is there in the pan … this slice is the part you keep.”
You guys just love rooting for the underdog, don’t you?
It was a close race, with the winner taking only 18.3% of the nearly 2500 votes cast. Our second place winner captured 17.8% of the votes:
“I hope you like it – the chef was one of our best students.”
A good dig at Syracuse is bested only by a good dig at Washington’s socialist agenda. Thanks for all your captions and for voting!
* Happy Rosh Hashanah. [ABC]
* Mayer Brown and Reed Smith could be trying to kill the billable hour too. [Legal Week]
* When it comes to executing prisoners, should we allow mulligans? [Cleveland Plain Dealer]
* A Maryland police officer who t-boned a car and killed the driver could not be charged with vehicular manslaughter thanks to the state’s tough mens rea requirement. So instead, a civil jury has entered a $4 million verdict against him. [Washington Post]
* However, two Florida school administrators who violated a consent decree by leading prayer in a public school could face jail time if convicted. [CNN]
* The Senate has passed a bill to make Amtrak a more appealing travel option: Guns on trains! Now you’ll have a toy to play with during the inevitable train break down. Thanks, Second Amendment! [New York Times]
Last Thursday, we posted a photo of VP Joe Biden enjoying some good ol’ blueberry pie at his alma mater, Syracuse University College of Law. It was up to you to come up with a caption for the picture, and now it’s time to choose the best one. Here’s the photo once again:
After the jump, check out the finalists.
Let’s be honest. Whether it was that gunner in your 1L section, some douche from UVA Law, or Elie in his True/Slant race rants, we have all wanted to bind and gag someone at some point. But most of us understand that this practice is best left to consenting adults. In the bedroom. With a safe word.
Judge Stephen Belden from the Municipal Court in Canton, OH is not like most of us. Growing tired of a disrespectful defendant during a preliminary hearing last week, Judge Belden ordered the bailiff to duct tape the defendant’s mouth shut. The Repository reports:
At the start of the hearing, [Defendant Harry] Brown told Belden that he wasn’t happy with his public defender, who he claimed hadn’t done enough work on the case.
Belden said he wasn’t going to appoint a different attorney. If Brown didn’t want the public defender, he could represent himself, although he would be a fool to do so, the judge said.
Brown and Belden went back and forth for about four minutes, at times talking over each other, until Belden told his bailiff, Jeffrey Smith, to get the duct tape.
“I’m gonna get some duct tape. If you keep interrupting me, I’m gonna have Mr. Smith put it over your mouth, OK?”
Brown said he would go back to the holding area for prisoners.
“No, you can’t go back there and sit. You’re staying right here,” Belden said.
Brown kept talking.
“All right, duct tape. Duct tape the defendant,” Belden said.
There are just… so many questions. Only a few of them are answered after the jump.
* NALP is forming a commission to review law firm hiring practices, including the current timetable for 2L OCI recruiting. [Am Law Daily]
* Bankruptcy judges are chastising mortgage servicers for their sloppy business practices and their poor communications. [New York Times]
* Associates who went to lower-ranked law schools tend to be happier and harder working in their BigLaw job. Why? For the same reason that ugly people are better in bed – they have to be. [WSJ Law Blog]
* Unemployment hits 9.7%. That is not funny. [New York Times]
* The 2nd Circuit reaffirms that wiretap warrants should only be granted to the government after a detailed explanation of why the wiretap is necessary. Then the court reinstates evidence acquired pursuant to a wiretap warrant that probably shouldn’t have been granted. [Threat Level/Wired]
* This is just not a good time to be Proskauer Rose. The firm is now being sued in Nevada on a malpractice claim that was rejected in Texas for improper venue. [National Law Journal]
* Could the SEC be sued for negligence in failing to properly investigate Bernie Madoff? [Time]
* The U.N. is sovereign territory, so Libyan leader Muammar el-Qaddafi can stay there if they want him to. But Englewood, New Jersey is squarely within the jurisdiction of the United States government. [New York Times]
* Chicago’s local government is apparently doing its part to keep the struggling Chicago legal market afloat. [Am Law Daily]
* Something you learned in Public International Law is actually being used in the real world. Foreign litigants are suing US corporations in US court under the Alien Torts Statute. [Wall Street Journal]
* President Obama has paid Perkins Coie over $1 million in fees to suppress “birther” litigation. Now, how about suppressing the birther movement altogether? [Legal Blog Watch]
* Last week, it was a Special Assistant AG eliminating witnesses. This week, a NY Supreme Court Justice is convicted of soliciting bribes from attorneys appearing before him. It’s a hell of a town. [Law.com]
* Former Gitmo detainee to sue US government for compensation. Surely there’s room here for some Class Action action. [The Times Online]
* Terminally ill Lockerbie Bomber was released from a Scottish prison yesterday, on grounds of compassion. Barack Obama and Hillary Clinton aren’t feeling it. [CNN]
* Attorneys at the Office of Special Investigations begin to prosecute a new generation of war criminals. [Washington Post]
* I suppose that I should know the answer to this question, but is your school accredited…? [Courthouse News]
* “Obviously, any witnesses you can eliminate is a good thing.” New York Special Assistant Attorney General prosecuted for (ahem) tampering with witnesses. [Bloomberg]
* Skank fight! [New York Post]
* Are you ready for some football? All my rowdy friends will be at an emergency injunction hearing in Delaware, Monday Night! [The Legal Intelligencer]
Ed. note: These non-sequiturs are brought to you by Karen, one of our awesome interns.
* The MPRE proves that you can, in fact, learn ethics from signing a paper and maybe filling in some bubbles. [Huffington Post]
* If U. Miami’s encouraged deferrals get pushed a bit further, deferring law school might not be a choice. [Plan B]
* Incoming associates deferred, current associates laid off, and law firm partners… sabbaticaled? [Concurring Opinions]
* Don’t let the imagery of bloody, clubbed baby seals stop you, dear tipsters. [Law and More]
* Yes, it’s The Enquirer; but they have earned some credibility on this issue, don’t you think? [The D.C. Write-Up]
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Ed. note: The Asia Chronicles column is authored by Kinney Recruiting. Kinney has made more placements of U.S. associates, counsels and partners in Asia than any other recruiting firm in each of the past six years. You can reach them by email: email@example.com.
Deal flow has clearly picked recently up for most US associates, counsels and partners in Hong Kong/China and Singapore. We are on the phone with a lot of these folks on a daily basis, many of whom we have known for years. Further, the head of our Asia team, Evan Jowers, and Kinney’s founder and president, Robert Kinney, frequently meet in person with leading US partners in Asia to assess their needs and keep on top of the inside scoop at as many firms as possible. The need for legal recruiting help in Asia from experienced recruiters appears to be live and well. In March, Evan and Robert were in Beijing at such meetings, in April, Evan was in Hong Kong, and for half of June Evan will be in Shanghai and Hong Kong. Thus its pretty easy for us to tell when there has been an across-the-market pick up in capital markets and corporate work.
On an average day in Asia when Evan and Robert visit firms, they typically have 5 to 9 meetings a day, mostly with US partners in the market. The reason they have these meetings is not simply because Kinney makes a lot of US attorney placements in Asia and that a particular firm may have openings; instead these are just visits with friends. After years of working together as business partners, the folks at Kinney are actually these peoples’ friends. The firms Kinney work closely with in Asia (which is just about every law firm – call us if you want to know the one firm in the world we will never place anyone with again, ever, and why) look forward to the visits, or at least act like they do. After seven years in the market, many of the client partners are former associate candidates. Also, these US partners see Kinney as a very good source of market information as well, because they know how deep their contacts are in the market and how frequently they are speaking to counterparts at peer firms.
In a land that is right here and in a time that is right now, a technology has arisen so powerful that it can replace basic human document review. Is it time to bow down before our new robot overlords?
First, here’s a little story about me: my life in the legal world began as a paralegal. My first case was a GIANT patent infringement case that was already six years old and had involved as many as five companies, multiple US courts, the ITC and an international standards committee. I knew nothing about any of this.
On my first day, my supervisor (a paralegal with at least eight other cases driving her crazy) sat me down in front of a Concordance database with a 100,000+ patents and patent file histories. “Code these,” she said. I learned that “coding”, for the purposes of this exercise, meant manually typing the inventor’s name, the title of the patent, the assignee, the file date, and other objective data for each document. I worked on that project – and only that project – for at least the first six months of my job. After a week or so, time began to blur.
What I know, in retrospect and with absolutely certainty, is that as time began to blur, so did my judgment. So did my attention to detail. If you could tell me that I did not make at least one mistake a day – one inconsistent spelling, one reversed day and month, one incorrectly spaced title – I frankly would need to see your evidence. I would not believe it. The human mind is trainable but it is not a machine.
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