Morning Dockette

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Posts by Morning Dockette

  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 02.18.11

    * “As virtually any clown can attest, no one owns the idea of making a balloon dog.” Jeff Koons was on the wrong side of this awesome legal beatdown. [Freakonomics / New York Times] * In honor of his memory, a new federal courthouse in Arizona will be named after Judge John M. Roll. [CNN] […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 02.16.11

    * Criminals and foreclosure victims subject to criminal mortgage rates now have something in common in New York: guaranteed legal representation. [New York Times] * Not getting your fill of Broadway injuries from Spider-Man? Then Billy Elliot’s got a deal for you — tickets now come with a complimentary face smash worth $4M. [New York […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 02.14.11

    * The Video Game Bar Association: perfect for unemployed lawyers who play Call of Duty all day… like my boyfriend. Happy Valentine’s Day, please don’t break up with me! [Am Law Daily] * Is Hugh Hefner cooking the books? He valued the Playboy Mansion at $1.2M, but this lawsuit says he was off on the […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 02.04.11

    * The Cooch has demanded immediate Supreme Court review for Obamacare. Is this just “grandstanding by Ken Kookynutty”? [Virginia Politics / Washington Post] * Holy benchslap, Obama! Judge Feldman basically spanked Barack’s entire administration and told them all to go to their rooms over some offshore drilling shenanigans. [Bloomberg] * Only in Alabama is it […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 02.03.11

    * When it comes to Obamacare, Senate Democrats have broken it down MC Hammer style for Republicans: you can’t repeal this. [Bloomberg] * How dare this woman sue Nutella! What kind of an evil human being would do that? That stuff is like spreadable crack! Who cares if it’s actually healthy? [Top Class Actions] * […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 02.02.11

    * A Florida lawyer says he’s a psychic who can commune with the dead. Maybe he’ll be having a chat with his legal career soon. [WFTV Orlando] * How can crazy cabbies avoid lawsuits from crazier passengers in New York? “Cabs shouldn’t pick up women.” Duh. [New York Daily News] * Obamacare might be dead […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 02.01.11

    * I wish my creepy landlord spied on me. I’d be $326,000 richer after paying off my law school loans. [FloriDUH / Sun-Sentinel] * Why deal with civil unions in Illinois before massive budget issues? Because the gays know how to plan a party, so kiss that deficit goodbye. [Chicago Tribune] * Halle Berry is […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 01.31.11

    * Lawyers, just as an FYI, downgrading from a Porsche to a Beamer won’t make you look poor. [New Jersey Law Journal] * Representing Porsche and then punching another lawyer in the head? That’s another story. [Times-Tribune] * Repeal this, bitch. The Ninth Circuit has politely flipped the DOJ the bird over its request to […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 01.21.11

    * How does it feel to get laughed at by the Supreme Court? Ask AT&T’s lawyer. He shouldn’t feel bad, though, it was nothing personal. [Washington Post] * “Michael J. Devereaux and has earned a reputation in New York’s legal and business community for excellence.” And sextortion. Don’t forget the sextortion. [New York Post] * […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 01.19.11

    * Twenty six states hate health care Obama. This law might be more screwed than someone with a pre-existing condition. [Los Angeles Times] * Handcuffed, blindfolded, beaten, and begging to be deported. I think the Justice Department forgot the safe word. [Mother Jones] * Thomas Jefferson School of Law has a great connection to paleontology. […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 01.07.11

    * If you’re a famous pill-popper, you can now blame your shadiness on privacy needs. Judges will totally feel bad for you and let you off the hook. [Los Angeles Times] * Match.com wants you to know that it’s okay to look. What they don’t want you to know is that you’re looking for love […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 01.06.11

    * Anyone want to buy a piece of toilet paper for $200K? On second thought, don’t, it’ll probably chafe your ass. [NetNet / CNBC] * Dead sexy. This girl’s New Year’s Eve joy ride allegedly ended in a post-mortem strip search and photo shoot. [Fox News] * Jersey restauranteurs aren’t fans of BYOB liquor laws. […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 01.05.11

    * This Kentucky attorney is filing a new brief against the TSA, but not the kind that you’d expect. [Cincinnati Enquirer] * There used to be a street in Chicago named after Rahm Emanuel, but it was changed because nobody crosses Rahm Emanuel and lives. [Clout Street / Chicago Tribune] * Who wants to plug […]

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  • Facebook, Hair, Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 01.04.11

    * Hey baby, your placenta or mine? Four nursing students may have aborted their careers due to oversharing on Facebook — and now one of them is suing. [Wall Street Journal] * Like sh*t through a goose: a woman claims she now has digestive problems because she got to second base with Donald Duck. [Washington […]

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  • Morning Docket

    Morning Docket: 01.03.11

    * For just pennies a day, you can outsource your legal work to a lawyer who doesn’t even know what a penny is. [Los Angeles Times] * They might have terk your jerbs, but the Republicans are going take their schooling and birthright citizenship. [New York Times] * Oh no, Joe, say it ain’t so! […]

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