B for Beauty

* What happens if a Supreme Court clerk violates the Code of Conduct and leaks information to the press at the behest of a justice? At worst, he’d probably be forced to wash dirty socks from the SCOTUS morning exercise class. [National Law Journal]

* “[T]he great expectations when he was elected have not come to fruition.” Making judicial nominations wasn’t a high political priority, so President Barack Obama will be ending his term with just 125 lower-court appointments in the federal judiciary. [New York Times]

* If there’s anything that Paul Ryan’s good at, it’s soliciting money from lawyers and Biglaw firms. Alston & Bird tops the list of legal campaign contributors, with Patton Boggs in a close second. [Am Law Daily (sub. req.)]

* Apparently the female reproduction system shuts down to prevent conception upon rape. This improbable tidbit from a man who sits on the House Committee on Science, Space, and Technology. [Wall Street Journal]

* But a great way to take some of the heat off of the “legitimate rape” dude is to break news about another Congressman’s nude swim in the Sea of Galilee while in Israel. Excellent work on this distraction. [POLITICO]

* What crisis? Despite a steep decline in applicants, the average law school’s tuition will climb by more than double the rate of inflation this fall. It’s really heartwarming how they put students first. [National Law Journal]

* Customs agents in Los Angeles seized 20,457 pairs of faux Christian Louboutins that would’ve been worth approximately $18M. For this heinous crime of fashion, the offending shoes will undergo a trial by fire. [CNN]

* Karma sure is a Blitsch. Matthew Couloute, the alleged lawyerly Lothario who got slammed by his exes on LiarsCheatersRUs.com, is now being slammed by someone else: his soon-to-be ex-wife. [New York Post]

* Beauty school dropout, no pube hair trimming days for you! Seventeen female plaintiffs have alleged that a cosmetology instructor subjected them to less-than-sanitary lessons in a federal suit. [New York Daily News]

In recent months, we’ve covered quite a few stories about attorneys from Texas with a certain je ne sais quoi — we’ll call it “flair.” Today, we’ve got some positive news from the Lone Star State, straight out of Texas Tech University School of Law, an institution known for “keepin’ it real.”

Although the school is ranked at No. 101 by U.S. News, just on the cusp of the traditional second and third tier, a tipster notes that “one tiara is better than any tier.” In exciting news, over the weekend, a beautiful rising 3L at Texas Tech Law was crowned as the new Miss Texas 2012.

We know, we know: pics or it didn’t happen.

We aim to please, so of course we’ve got the pictures — yes, the pageant included a swimsuit competition — as well as an interview with this law student turned beauty queen.

Let’s check out the new Miss Texas 2012, shall we?

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You’ve heard about lawyers who schedule depositions at Dunkin’ Donuts, but you’ve probably never heard about lawyers who get their nails and their briefs polished at the same time.

It looks like the latest trend for professional women in New York is the “manicure meeting,” a time when participants must sit and listen to each other, instead of sitting and pretending to listen to each other (while at the same time endlessly following the Bill Urquhart directive to CHECK YOU EMAIL).

But how did the manicure meeting come into existence? And more importantly, is this feasible for the women of Biglaw?

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Have you ever watched America’s Next Top Model? We have (but only because of the lawyerly competitors). In recent years, the show has featured a number of plus-size women, with one of them winning the competition in 2008. Many critics have referred to these women as “fat,” wondering if these curvy girls could really stand a chance in the modeling world. But they weren’t actually fat, or even plus-size — realistically speaking, they were quite average. They just didn’t fit the so-called modeling mold.

So what happens when your run-of-the-mill model, a woman who has been called “very skinny, almost anorexically skinny,” is deemed too fat to model by her own agency? This is apparently what happened to the winner of Holland’s Next Top Model, who decided to sue over it.

Who is this skinny-fat model, and what does she look like? More importantly, how did she fare in court? Read on for all of this and more, including some slightly-NSFW pictures (not nude, but racy)….

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Our law student is hotter.

When you think of Oklahoma, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? For some it’s a Broadway musical, for others, it’s agriculture, and for others still, it’s football. But what about beautiful, intelligent women?

Today, we’ve got a story for our readers about a law student with some really big… brains. A tipster notified us about this sexy Sooner and the double life she leads: she’s a second-year law student, but in her free time, she’s a model who’s worked at some of the finest breastaurants in the business.

Who is this lovely law student, and which law school does she attend? More importantly, what does she look like? Semi-NSFW pics, or it didn’t happen….

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Readers, we know what you must be asking yourselves: fashion law? Is that similar to unicorn law? No. Unlike unicorn law, and contrary to public opinion, fashion law actually exists.

In the past, we’ve written about lawyers and law students who have violated multiple fashion laws. We’ve even profiled a lawyer who specializes in fashion law. But we’ve never given you the scoop on what it’s like to be an insider in the business of beauty.

Earlier this week, the New York City Bar Association’s Committee on Fashion Law hosted an event that featured in-house attorneys from some of the country’s most prominent cosmetic brands — companies like Coty, Avon Products, Elizabeth Arden, and Revlon.

So, what’s it really like to be an in-house attorney working in the beauty and fashion industry? Will you get to flex your copyright and trademark muscles? Is it really as glamorous as it all seems?

Read more at Fashionista….

Deborah Rhode

I don’t wear makeup, nor do I wish to spend 20 minutes applying it.

Deborah Rhode, professor at Stanford Law School and author of The Beauty Bias: The Injustice of Appearance in Life and Law (affiliate link), commenting on the results of a recent study funded by Procter & Gamble, which concluded that women who wore makeup were considered more competent.

Somewhere in America, another man who has been embarrassed by an overpriced manicure is clapping (albeit carefully, so that he doesn’t chip his nail polish).

Norris Sydnor III, a 43-year-old Maryland man, is suing his nail salon for $200,000 after being charged $10 for a manicure, when women beside him were being charged only $9 for the same service. A judge issued an injunction on June 15 which ordered the salon to stop charging men more than women. A trial is set for July 21.

When I first read about this lawsuit, I was jealous, because my manicures usually cost $15. I want a $9 manicure, and I don’t want to have to drive to Maryland to get one. My jealousy, however, turned to rage when I found out that Sydnor’s lawyer, Jimmy Bell, is comparing his client to Rosa Parks.

Is this guy seriously suing over one dollar? And is his lawyer actually comparing him to one of the revolutionaries of the civil rights era? The answer to both of those questions, sadly, is yes, and I’m pissed off about it. In fact, I was so pissed off that I actually did some research about this lawsuit. And boy, am I glad that I did…

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Ed. note: Have a question for next week? Send it in to advice@abovethelaw.com.

pls hndle copy 2.jpgATL,
I was wondering whether I should get/admit to getting plastic surgery.
My issue is that if I was in L.A., I would have done it already, but Chi-town is different, and I want my co-workers to take me seriously notwithstanding the potential surgery.
Too Sexy for My Face

Dear Too Sexy for My Face,
At approximately 8:43 a.m. on November 1, 2001, in an office on Central Park South, Dr. Michael Evan Sachs punched me in the nose with his scalpel. Five days after his precision beating, I removed the bandages to reveal a magnificent elf shoe perched in the middle of my face. Going into the surgery, I hoped that a new nose would solve all my problems. Needless to say, I was not disappointed.
There’s nothing inherently shameful about plastic surgery; some of us were simply born monsters and require surgery to address the situation. The only shameful thing about the whole ordeal is hatching some ludicrous story to explain away your new feature(s) or banking on the fact that your colleagues aren’t observant people and don’t live for this sort of shit. If you show up at work with two Christmas hams stuffed in your shirt or half of your nose hacked off and still pale despite your “Costa Rica trip,” your colleagues will notice, mainly because they aren’t morons. And because they’re tactful professionals, they won’t confront you about it, they’ll just tear you to shreds behind your back. Keeping quiet about it doesn’t make you look discreet, it makes you seem ashamed. If you remove the shame from the equation, the vicious gossip loses its sting. There’s not really anything further for people to discuss about your surgery if you’ve already told them everything yourself.
Stop being corny and worried about whether your colleagues will think you’re vain. Of course you’re vain if you’re getting cosmetic surgery, and there is no sense in wasting time or energy disabusing yourself or coworkers of the truth. Be true to yourself, even the plastic parts.
Your friend,
Elie objectifies us all, after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Pls Hndle Thx: Too Sexy for My Law Firm”

Andrew Cuomo small Andy Cuomo Attorney General New York.JPGIt’s not often that the worlds of law and fashion intersect. There’s much more overlap between the worlds of law and finance, ably covered by our colleagues at Dealbreaker.
But an investigation by New York Attorney General Andrew Cuomo into the practice known as “astroturfing” offers us this opportunity to give a shout-out to the glamorous world of beauty and fashion. Read more (and comment) over at our sister site, Fashionista.
Cuomo’s Beauty Crackdown [Fashionista]

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