Bad Ideas

New York Lawmakers Want to Ban Anonymous Commenting. I Wish I Were Kidding.

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A large portion of the strenuous life of bloggers consists of cruising various news sites, looking for some tidbit ridiculous interesting enough to merit a couple hundred words. You do this long enough, and you wind up getting picky pretty quickly. So, last night, when I clicked over to Wired, it was surprising in and of itself that when I saw the following story I literally just stared at the screen, slack jawed, for close to a minute.

That’s how ridiculous this proposed legislation coming out of New York is. The only thing I can say is that if this bill somehow managed to become law, the Above the Law commentariat would not be happy at all…

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LSAT Tutor Improperly Claimed He Got Three Perfect Scores; The Internet (And a Competitor) Get Very, Very Angry

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We don’t cover the goings-on over at Top Law Schools very often. It’s such a vibrant online community that one could devote an entire second site to meta-coverage of TLS. But over the last couple of weeks, a scandal of sorts has been unfolding. It is unusual enough that we figured it’s worth talking about.

An LSAT tutor by the name of Dave Hall has, for some time, promoted his business over at the TLS forums. He conducts most of his teaching over the internet, and he appears to have a fairly solid fan base on the site. Recently, he landed in some pretty hot water when his longstanding claim of receiving three perfect LSAT scores turned out to be untrue.

The site erupted in conspiracy theories, harsh criticism, and allegations of forging documents. In the midst of the hullabaloo, another tutoring service sued Hall for unfair competition.

Who knew the dreary world of test prep services could be so dramatic? Well, we spoke to Hall about the situation he’s found himself in. The story is not quite what you might expect….

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Potential NFL Rookie Is About To Make The Biggest Mistake Of His Life By Going To Law School

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Andrew Sweat

If you know Cleveland Browns rookie free agent Andrew Sweat, please send him this post. Tell him to drop me a line. Let me help this man avoid making what could be the biggest mistake of his life.

Sweat, a linebacker for the Ohio State Buckeyes, went undrafted in last month’s NFL draft. He later signed as a rookie free agent with the Browns. Now, instead of attending camp and trying to make the team, Sweat has decided to give up on his NFL career and attend law school instead.

Not even a very highly ranked law school. More like the Cleveland Browns of law schools.

I can’t know if Sweat’s decision is being partially motivated by all the media attention focused on the long-term health consequences of playing in the NFL. But I’d bet all the money in my pocket that Sweat has not been paying attention to the media coverage of the long-term professional and financial damage that can be done by going to law school…

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Lawyer of the Month: April Reader Poll

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April showers are supposed bring May flowers, but in the law world, April just showered us with a bunch of ridiculous lawyers acting like complete a-holes. One can only hope that May’s crop of nominees for the Lawyer of the Month contest brings us some more worthy competitors.

Drunken hotties? We’ve got ‘em. Nasty note writers? We’ve got those, too.

Let’s check out our nominees for April’s Lawyer of the Month competition….

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Lawyer of the Day: Criminal Defense Attorney Accused of Offering ‘Pro Boner’ Assistance to Female Inmates

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Depending on which state you’re licensed in, you may have to do a certain number of pro bono service hours in order to keep up with your ethical obligations. In general, doing pro bono work is a great way to get that happy feeling deep down inside.

But one lawyer in Georgia may have a different idea about how to achieve that sense of inner nirvana. He’s allegedly more interested in getting serviced pro boner than offering pro bono services.

That being said, let’s meet our Lawyer of the Day, a man who stands accused of trading contraband for peep shows from prisoners at the local jail….

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Kid Posts Take Home Exam Question On Message Board Looking For Answers, Finds Only Ridicule

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It’s finals period at many law schools around the country. Here at Above the Law, that means we can expect our inbox to get very entertaining. Pressure + law students + internet = loads of fun.

Well, it’s not just “pressure” that makes some law students wilt during finals period. There is no accounting for plumb stupid.

But today, we’ve got a story that is both stupid and unethical. A student at a top 14 law school reportedly posted a question from his Constitutional Law exam on a message board. He apparently posted it during the take home.

Yes, Virginia, it’s still cheating even if you do it online.

Or should I say: “Yes, Durham”???

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During Finals, Even The Toilet Paper Can Offer A Moment Of Clarity

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Isn't this what the toilet paper looks like at your law school?

Shouldn’t Bar/Bri or somebody sell toilet paper with property rules on it so people could take an easement on the throne? Perhaps one could adversely possess the toilet in an open, hostile, and notorious manner?

Sorry, I don’t usually go for toilet humor, but students at Case Western Reserve University School of Law have inspired me. Somebody at Case has been using TP in very interesting ways.

But the toilet paper isn’t trying to save your GPA, it’s trying to save your soul…

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SCOTUS Clerkship Application FAIL

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It is the dream of many a young attorney to appear in front of the Supreme Court of the United States and argue the most important legal cases of the day.

To achieve career success like that of, say, Carter Phillips, who has argued dozens of cases in front of the nine, is a lofty aspiration, to say the least.

But there are other ways of appearing in front of a Supreme Court justice that might leave you with the bitter taste of bile in your mouth. At least one law student knows what we mean by that, quite literally….

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Ladies, It’s Time to Get Back in the Kitchen Where You Belong

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Or at least that’s what one Biglaw firm seems to think.

Over the weekend, lady lawyers got a serious case of the vapors when word got out that a firm that’s had its fair share of bad press was busy promoting a cooking class for one of its women’s initiatives programs.

Yes, a cooking class — because nothing says “I’m a successful attorney” quite like the ability to serve masterfully prepared hors d’oeuvres (bonus points if the cooking is done while barefoot and/or pregnant).

It’s almost enough to make these women wish they were Lathamed….

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Law School Contemplates Offering Dumbest LL.M. Ever

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From time to time, we have an opportunity to opine on LL.M. programs. I think they’re pretty much all worthless (tax LL.M. notwithstanding), but law schools make a lot of money from offering the programs.

There’s a whole industry involved in making you think that just about any LL.M. degree can help you in your career. And, if you don’t already have a job, you want to believe that there’s something simple you can do to improve your situation. Hey, it only costs money.

In the battle between common sense and greedy law schools, desperate job seekers are the losers. But let this be our final battle. If anybody signs up for this proposed LL.M. program, we can officially say that law schools can sell anything….

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When Anonymous Commenting Goes Real Wrong

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People always ask the Above the Law editors, “What kinds of people leave such horrible comments on your website?” And we always say, “Regular people, the ones you work with or socialize with.”

Most internet commenters are regular people who, under the Invisibility Cloak of cyberspace, feel free to say whatever disgusting/ridiculous/illogical thing that pops into their heads.

Lest anyone think the phenomenon is unique to our website, please think again. For better or worse, trolling is an inevitable part of online media. Most of the time, it’s best to just ignore it. Once a while, however, anonymous online commenting may signify something larger and more pernicious.

Case in point: our inbox was flooded over the weekend with the emerging scandal of a prosecommenter (yeah, you read that right) in New Orleans. This is what happens when a federal prosecutor takes his case to the interwebs instead of the court. Bad times…

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Want To Work for a ‘Legal Baller’?

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If so, and if you happen to be a “[y]oung attractive hip female,” keep reading….

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