Hey, are you studying for the Bar Exam right now? BOO! Mwahaha. Just kidding. Look, if it makes you feel any better, your fate is probably already sealed. You’ve probably already done enough to pass this test next week, or when the results come back you’re going to be one of those people who makes ridiculous excuses for your poor performance.
So I’d spend most of this weekend just trying to get your head right, instead of trying cram in just a little more criminal procedure.
Of course, nobody actually taking the bar next week is going to listen to that advice. I tried to comfort a friend named Fred about the upcoming exam and he said: “I can’t recall the taste of food, nor the sound of water, nor the touch of grass. I’m… naked in the dark, with nothing, no veil between me and the wheel of fire! I can see him with my waking eyes.”
Letting your mind mix with the movies is not unusual at this stage of bar preparation. One kid really put his heart into it: not into studying exactly, but into coming up with an awesome Batman inspired hypo that he posted on Facebook…
Well, here we are, just one week ago until those fateful days. How are Nathan, Jeanette, and Andrew doing? Well, understandably they feel a little under the gun.
Our Bar Review Diarists all seem to have their own last-minute procrastination tools: Nathan went to a music festival, Jeanette watches bad television, and Andrew continues making far-out pop culture references. All perfectly normal, perfectly healthy….
Staci here. The bar exam is right around the corner, and fear is starting to set in — fear of not being able to cram enough law into your head, fear of confusing necessary information, and the worst fear of all, the fear of failure.
But for all the Adderall addicts out there, these fears don’t seem to exist. Not sure about your mastery of a particular MBE topic? Just pop another pill and study for eight hours straight. Problem solved! (Note that we do not condone using study drugs to get ahead of the curve on the exam.)
If you’re not a chronic pill popper, not to worry, because Mr. Bar Exam has got some advice for you about the “brain foods” that you can eat to improve your memory and concentration….
We only have two weeks left until the test. It’s about that time: our columnists’ brains are fried. They have been studying so long it seems they may have forgotten the most basic of non-lawyerly communication skills.
Let’s check in with Jeanette, Nathan, and Andrew as they compare their lives variously to Groundhog Day, feverishly come up with mnemonic devices, and transliterate show tunes into bar exam songs.
Staci here. Last weekend, hundreds of bar exam studiers crowded into the Javits Center to take BAR/BRI’s practice MBE for the New York bar exam. How did that turn out? Not so great, because apparently the average score was rather low. You can imagine how badly people are freaking out if their score was worse than the average.
And this might sound sick, but in addition to their practice MBE scores, some people are also worrying about their social lives, or lack thereof. But not to worry, because Mr. Bar Exam has got some sage advice for you on both fronts….
We’ve reached July, and there is less than a month until the test. Does this qualify as the home stretch? How are our esteemed Bar Review Diarists doing?
Well, they are working hard and doing what they can to not lose their minds (as bar review studiers are perhaps wont to do). Let’s check in with Jeanette, Nathan, and Andrew as they continue stumbling through the bar exam desert….
Staci here. As a frequent bar exam studier, I can tell you that the routine gets really old, really quickly. A day in the life of your average bar exam studier goes something like this: Wake up. Class. Library. Study. Cry. Drink. Rinse. Repeat. It’s a terrible, terrible time in law school graduates’ lives, and unfortunately there’s not much that can be done to avoid the epic monotony.
But in the meantime, there are other important things to focus on, like the upcoming practice MBE. How can you balance your studies without freaking out? Let’s see what Mr. Bar Exam has to say….
Are we there yet? Is it almost time to take the test yet? NO. There are still several week to go, and our Bar Review columnists are simultaneously working hard to stay motivated, and also straining to not get frustrated with the ridiculousness that the studying entails.
Let’s check in with Nathan, Jeanette, and Andrew, who are getting advice from strangers, navigating a never-ending parade of graduation parties, and starting to see hallucinations of bar exam questions in real life….
It's their world and we're all just playing in it.
* This is a great article on why the Supreme Court doesn’t leak, while more important institutions, like our national security apparatus, leak like a freaking sieve. [New Republic]
* Most law professors think the Affordable Care Act is constitutional. Most law professors think the Supreme Court will overturn the ACA anyway. ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED? [Bloomberg]
* And now for some SCOTUS thoughts from the amazingly amorphous Mitt Romney. Look at his works in equivocation, ye mighty, and despair. [Washington Post]
* You know, I don’t know how they afford this stuff, but having an inalienable right to “paid vacation” really feels like the kind of European invention we should be emulating. Good ideas can come from anywhere, folks. [Legal Blog Watch]
* Letting students sit for the bar exam after their second year but then making them come back to school for an even more obviously useless third year is a great way to make somebody have a total mental dissociative break. Just imagine calculating how much money you’re being forced to waste while you sit there in a 3L seminar called “Law and Ceramics.” [Faculty Lounge]
* Oh, I like this. The little Democrat in me can’t help but like this: a “global” financial transaction tax. Mmm… there’s nothing like the smell of global redistributive fairness. [Overlawyered]
* Jonathan Turley seems hurt that Ann Althouse and other conservative academics acted in a way that shows “we have lost the tradition of civil discourse in this country.” Yeah, umm, Professor Turley, perhaps you didn’t read the footnotes, but here on the internet we don’t have a tradition of civil discourse. We do have a tradition of ad hominem attacks, hyperbole, and pictures of cats. [Jonathan Turley]
In a land that is right here and in a time that is right now, a technology has arisen so powerful that it can replace basic human document review. Is it time to bow down before our new robot overlords?
First, here’s a little story about me: my life in the legal world began as a paralegal. My first case was a GIANT patent infringement case that was already six years old and had involved as many as five companies, multiple US courts, the ITC and an international standards committee. I knew nothing about any of this.
On my first day, my supervisor (a paralegal with at least eight other cases driving her crazy) sat me down in front of a Concordance database with a 100,000+ patents and patent file histories. “Code these,” she said. I learned that “coding”, for the purposes of this exercise, meant manually typing the inventor’s name, the title of the patent, the assignee, the file date, and other objective data for each document. I worked on that project – and only that project – for at least the first six months of my job. After a week or so, time began to blur.
What I know, in retrospect and with absolutely certainty, is that as time began to blur, so did my judgment. So did my attention to detail. If you could tell me that I did not make at least one mistake a day – one inconsistent spelling, one reversed day and month, one incorrectly spaced title – I frankly would need to see your evidence. I would not believe it. The human mind is trainable but it is not a machine.
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We currently have a number of active openings for associate roles at US and UK firms in HK / China, Singapore and two new in-house openings. As always, please feel free to reach out to us at firstname.lastname@example.org in order to get details of current openings in Asia, as well as to discuss the Asia markets in general and what we expect for openings later this year. Our Evan Jowers and Robert Kinney will be in Beijing the week of March 25 and Evan Jowers will be in Hong Kong the week of April 1, if you would like to meet them in person.
The US associate openings we have in law firms are in the usual areas of M&A, cap markets, FCPA / white collar litigation, finance, and project finance. The most urgent of our top tier (top 15 US or magic circle) law firm openings in Asia (among many other firm openings that we have in Asia) are as follows:
• 2nd to 5th year mandarin fluent M&A associates needed in Beijing and Hong Kong at several firms;
• Korean fluent 2nd to 4th year cap markets associate needed in Hong Kong;
• 2nd to 5th year Japanese fluent M&A associates needed in Tokyo;
• 4th to 6th year mandarin fluent cap markets associate needed in Hong Kong;
• 2nd to 4th year M&A / cap markets mix associate needed in Singapore.
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