Books

The U.S. News Best Law School rankings are aimed at prospective students, not law school administrators...

If you think that the liberal writer and the conservative justice have nothing in common, think again....

* If anything, baseball stadiums need less netting to prevent fans from catching foul balls. And if your six-year-old gets clocked in the head by a batted ball, it should be a lesson to wealthy fans in great seats to pay attention to the goddamn national pastime instead talking on your cell phone or watching the scoreboard or doing whatever non-baseball activity that distracted you from the 2-2 count with the lefty up at bat. [Legal Blog Watch] * Pop quiz, law professors. What do you do? [Volokh Conspiracy] * Here’s a great review of Mark Hermann’s book: Inside Straight, that focuses on Hermann’s use of the commenters in his material. This will provide excellent research for my own project: How I Became An Affirmative Action Walrus. [Simple Justice] * Don’t you love how the Michigan Law walk-out on Rob Portman is now actually a bit of a thing in the VEEPstakes? [Gawker] * It’s been a while since I studied commercial paper, but I’m pretty sure SpongeBob Squarepants coins aren’t going to pass muster. [Dealbreaker] * Ohio tries to further regulate fracking, but efforts to frustrate fracking f**k-ups feel futile. [Fulbright Fracking Blog] * Morrison & Foerster elects new firm leadership. [Thomson Reuters News & Insight]

* Kristen Saban has already moved to dismiss the suit filed by her former sorority sister stemming from their alleged sororitastic catfight. [WSFA] * Massage parlor busted in prostitution sting: a victory for human rights. Said massage parlor/brothel shares a building AND A SIGN with local law firm: hilarious. Of course there are pics. Do you even need to ask? [KREM] * Speaking of sex for money, Canada no longer offers visas for foreign strippers, escorts, or massage parlor workers. [Newser via Legal Blog Watch] * “I lost the Casey Anthony case. Vote for me for State Attorney!” Does the state of Florida realize the rest of the United States only keeps it around for comedic relief? [Daily Beast] * Missy Elliot is suing a car dealership that, she says, has not delivered her Lamborghini as agreed to. Man, that car dealer might be in trouble, because she’s a b*tch. See, Missy got more cheese. Back on up while she rolls up her sleeves. [Jalopnik] * I really don’t want to make this joke, but I feel like I have no choice: in San Francisco, two drunk guys walking around naked would not only not get arrested, but no one would even bother giving them a second look. [Legal Juice] * A state judge in Pennsylvania ruled that discovery of private content on Facebook is only “minimally intrusive.” In other words, if you still hadn’t heard, the “private” stuff you put on Facebook is really anything but. [CPR Law Blog] * More praise for the new book from our in-house counsel columnist Mark Herrmann. Nice work! [Class Action Blawg; Law and More] * Seton Hall Law professors are organizing a mini-golf tournament. It’s called networking, folks. [Lincoln ESQ.]

* What if — gasp — we rewrote the U.S. Constitution today? Take a look at this discussion once you’ve picked up your shattered originalist jaw from the floor. [Room for Debate / New York Times] * Kim Dotcom’s extradition hearing has been postponed until next spring. Maybe this will allow him more time to throw bodacious pool parties. [Threat Level / Wired] * A photo of $211,223.04 that Matthew Inman of the Oatmeal raised for charity. Hopefully this means that the Oatmeal/Charles Carreon lawsuit circus is finally leaving town. [The Oatmeal] * “Bada da da daaah… I’m loving it! Now give me my Big Mac or I’ll shoot you in the face.” [Legal Juice] * A San Francisco restaurant finds an creative way around California’s new foie gras ban. Force-fed duck liver 4Lyfe! [Inside Scoop SF] * The Supreme Court Term feels like a distant memory, but now’s a good time to look back on it with added perspective. Courtesy of MoloLamken, here’s a great guide to the big business cases of the Supreme Court Term just ended. Download or print it, then read it at your leisure. [MoloLamken (PDF)] * A nice review of Inside Straight columnist Mark Herrmann’s new book. (The ATL commenters even get a shout out. Boo yah!) [Legal Writing Prof Blog]

Mark Herrmann just might have some shocking, scandalous news... maybe...

A retired Skadden partner "downsized" to a $3 million penthouse. It's a tough life, but somebody's got to live it.

* Another year, another survey that shows prospective law students care more about the U.S. News Law School Rankings than anything else when applying to law school. In fact, it’s the exact same number from 2010. Kids are dumb. [Kaplan] * Everybody is worried about what will happen when computers replace attorneys. I’m much more interested in what will happen when computers replace hookers. [The Atlantic] * If watching our Congress ask idiot questions of Jamie Dimon doesn’t make you feel like we need vastly more intelligent Congresspeople, maybe watching them fawn over Jamie Dimon will do the trick. [Dealbreaker] * I really hadn’t thought of this — in addition to your huge educational debts, your parents are most likely out there spending your inheritance. I swear, if I ever spend money on more education, it’s going to be on a post-apocalyptic survivalist class. [Law and More] * Former TSA lady gropes current TSA lady after inappropriate groping from TSA. [Threat Level / Wired] * In real life, unlike Monopoly, a bank error is never really in your favor. [Legal Blog Watch] * Do the Republicans have an abortion problem? [New Yorker] * Happy Birthday, Lat! Check out the very cool gift (affiliate link) that he received in the mail today — signed by one of the authors. [Twitpic via Twitter]

Justice Scalia and legal writing guru Bryan Garner have written a new book. What's it all about?

Want to escape to the heartland? Check out the lovely home of a former Biglaw partner and general counsel, which is now on the market -- for a very modest price....

* In a Supreme Court decision split across gender lines, prosecutors can now get a do-over on criminal charges without double jeopardy, even if an otherwise deadlocked jury unanimously rejected them. [New York Times]

* And yet another day ended without a verdict in the John Edwards campaign finance trial, but the jury asked to review every exhibit in the case. The former presidential candidate must feel like he’s being punk’d. [CNN]

* The DOJ found that two prosecutors in the Ted Stevens case committed reckless professional misconduct punishable by unpaid time off. Looks like they’ll be getting an extended Memorial Day break. [Blog of Legal Times]

* Hot on the heels of Obama’s announcement in support of gay marriage, yet another California judge has found that DOMA is unconstitutional (along with a provision of the tax code). [Poliglot / Metro Weekly]

* Occupy Wall Street is suing for $48K over the destruction of the group’s “People’s Library” after their eviction from Zuccotti Park. But let’s get real, who wants used books that reek like patchouli and pot? [Bloomberg]

* More than one million “de facto spouses” in Quebec may soon be automatically married by the state against their will. Imagine how much fun it’ll be to get a divorce from someone you never actually married. [Slate]

* Two waitresses who claim they were fired for complaining about their former employer’s “no fatties” policy will get to bring their $15M lawsuit before a jury. Hopefully Peter Griffin isn’t a juror. [Law & Daily Life / FindLaw]

A Bay Area judge allowed a defendant out on bail on condition that he read daily and compose book reports. That's some creative judicial thinking!

Is lawyer humor a generational thing?

Business meetings: We have them all the time, and people misuse them. How can we fix this?

* California is cutting prisons. That’s step one. Step two is to shuttle all the prisoners to Los Angeles. Step three involves a series of earthquakes… [McClatchy] * Private equity billionaire Stephen Schwarzman isn’t into 50 Shades of Grey (affiliate link). But David Lat apparently is. I dunno, if you are going to bother with that kind of stuff, you might as well hit Brazzers and get it over with. [Dealbreaker] * I’m all for making sure that the Violence Against Women reauthorization prevents violence against women, not annoyances against women, or criticism against women. [The Volokh Conspiracy] * Speaking of violence against women, I never blame the victim, but dating gun-toting dumbasses rarely helps matters. [Legal Blog Watch] * @chrisdanzig: Stop bullying Obama @realjonlovitz. Leave him alone. Leave Obama alone! [Huffington Post] * What do Vladimir Putin and former Dewey partner John Altorelli allegedly share in common? [New York Post]

The "Inside Straight" column is being turned into a book. And some of your words might appear in it!

What type of music does celebrity lawyer Paul Clement enjoy listening to? The answer might surprise you.

Why did Tucker Max wait so long to start spreading the news about his Planned Parenthood donation fiasco? Maybe it’s because he was scamming us all along….

Ed. note: This post is by Will Meyerhofer, a former Sullivan & Cromwell attorney turned psychotherapist. He holds degrees from Harvard, NYU Law, and The Hunter College School of Social Work, and he blogs at The People’s Therapist. His new book, Way Worse Than Being A Dentist, is available on Amazon, as is his previous […]

* How many friend requests did these firms just get? Fenwick & West and Simpson Thacher are the Biglaw stars of Facebook’s S-1 filing for its $5B initial public offering. Like. [Am Law Daily] * The prosecution is expected to make its arguments today in Julian Assange’s appeal of his extradition from the U.K. to […]