Documentarian Michael Moore would have us believe that everyone in the Great White North is friendly and loving, leave their doors unlocked, and have no need for guns. Well, there are definitely some crazy, violent types residing in Canada. Like the Greyhound bus killer. And Ontario’s former attorney general.

Michael Bryant, a Harvard LLM graduate and youngest AG in Ontario’s history, had a minor collision with a 33-year-old bike courier, who then made the unwise decision to grab onto Bryant’s Saab. From the New York Times:

[P]olice received reports of a Saab convertible racing past the fashionable shops of Bloor Street with a man clinging to its side. Two construction workers doing repairs along the road told CTV, a Canadian television network, that the car accelerated, its tires squealing, before veering into oncoming traffic on the left side of the street.

The workers said that the motorist repeatedly mounted the sidewalk and drove near lampposts in what seemed to be an attempt to brush off the man hanging onto the side.

One of the workers said the driver was “yelling pretty loud and he sounded very, very angry.” The other worker said, “He meant to knock him off.”

Several witnesses said that the clinging man flew off of the car after striking a mailbox.

Sheppard — the bike messenger — did not survive the incident, and Bryant is now charged with criminal negligence in his death. Many media outlets have pointed out that as attorney general, Bryant championed laws making Canadian roads safer, namely banning street racing.

But what they don’t point out is that sometimes bike messengers are really crazy and scary. But that doesn’t justify slamming them up against things on the road and killing them. Just punch annoying cyclists in the face. It’s okay to do in New York.

Canadian Politician Charged in Death [New York Times]
Former attorney general says he’s innocent [Associated Press]
Driver Punches Cyclist in the Face After Blocking Bike Lane [Gothamist]

Have you noticed that every time we run a story about the legal market in Canada there are a bunch of commenters telling us how great things are for lawyers in the great white north? Well, now we know why. The American Lawyer reports that the Canadian government has been pitching in to help Canadian and American law firms:

According to records obtained by The Lawyers Weekly, the Canadian government spent a record $57.1 million on outside law firms in the 2008-09 fiscal year. It’s the most Canada has ever paid out to private law firms in one year and represents a 34 percent increase from legal fees paid in 2007-08. (All expenditures have been converted from Canadian dollars at the rate of $1 Canadian = $ 0.936 U.S.)

Weil, Gotshal & Manges led the pack of outside legal advisers with $7.7 million in billings.

That is some change I can believe in. When global warming fully kicks in Canada is going to be awesome.

Why the jump in government work for outside counsel? The answer is something so obvious that liberals and libertarians have been talking about it for years.

Details after the jump.

Six impressive lawyers headline our survey of this week’s NYT wedding pages. Even more impressive is that four of them are still clinging to Biglaw jobs — assuming, of course, that bad news does not await any of our returning honeymooners.

Here are the finalists:

1. Neda Karamouz and Stephen Vander Stoep

2. Danielle Cohen and Bradley Friedman

3. Leslie Tobin and Nathan Ostrander

Click on the link below to get the story on these newlyweds’ degrees, jobs, and china patterns.

When the economy was better, we had a career alternatives for lawyers series, for those in Biglaw looking to dabble in something new. Since idle job searches have given way to desperate ones, we’re running a new series: “Can’t find work?” It’s aimed at offering options to those shut out — or forced out — of Biglaw. If you have suggestions for the series, email us with “Can’t Find Work” as the subject.

So far, we’ve suggested volunteering or starting your own firm. One ATL reader has a novel idea: “writing the Alberta Bar.” He pointed us to Where’s a Lawyer When You Need One?. The MacLeans article suggests that Canada has a shortage of lawyers due to a dearth of law schools:

People call her family law practice in Edmonton all day long, trying to find a lawyer to hire, but there aren’t any available. “We can’t even call them all back. We’re too busy,” says Miller, a collaborative family lawyer and mediator. “It’s really problematic. Even if someone has an emerging situation, or court pending, sometimes you just have to say, ‘Good luck, sorry. We’re not taking any more clients.’ “

Miller’s office isn’t the only one fielding desperate calls. In Edmonton and Calgary, family lawyers are refusing to take on new cases, keeping closed client lists just as a family doctor would, says David Percy, dean of the University of Alberta law faculty. “We send out emails seeing if other lawyers are taking clients,” Miller says, but even if there are some available, “within two weeks, they’re booked up.” While Alberta’s boom has aggravated the situation, other parts of the country report they’re facing a lawyer shortage, too, especially rural areas.

Unemployed ones, here’s what you need to get started. No visa required!

Caveat: family law may be booming in Canada, but we have heard news of layoffs at firms in the Great White North. The Legal Post reports that “layoffs in the Canadian legal community are picking up steam,” but that it’s not as bad as in the US of A:

[Canada won’t] see the same scale of layoffs as in the U.S. legal community. There, law firms can fire lawyers without severance and they tend to ramp up and use more juniors to leverage firm profitability. Canadian firms don’t do that to the same extent, so when the market slows, they’re not as lawyer-heavy.

A tipster weighs in on Canadian stealth layoffs, after the jump.

Prominent New York litigator Marc Dreier — founder and managing partner of Dreier LLP, former head of litigation for Fulbright & Jaworski (NY), and former litigation partner at Rosenman & Colin — was arrested in Toronto on Tuesday. The arrest was carried out by Canadian law enforcement.

The alleged offense appears to be financial in nature, with sources mentioning money laundering and misuse of escrow funds as possible charges. The Ontario Teachers Pension Fund and Fortress Investment Group may be involved in some capacity.

The effect of Dreier’s arrest on the firm that bears his name is unclear, but certainly not good. Sources report that some firm escrow accounts have been frozen by law enforcement authorities. Emergency partnership meetings were held Wednesday and today. (This may explain why Marc Dreier and a firm spokesperson did not immediately return our calls seeking comment.)

Marc Dreier lives well, with a fabulous Manhattan apartment rumored to rent for $50,000 a month, plus a place out in the Hamptons. “He lives the life of Greek billionaire tycoon, but he doesn’t make that much money,” says a former employee.

Dreier may not be a Greek billionaire tycoon, but Dreier LLP has been quite successful. According to its firm profile, since its founding in 1996, Dreier has grown to include more than 250 attorneys in six cities. The firm has had a number of high-profile clients, including billionaire developer Sheldon Solow and controversial book publisher Judith Regan (whom the firm later sued, claiming she skipped out on legal fees).

The firm’s holiday party was scheduled to take place tonight at the Waldorf. Not surprisingly, the festivities have been canceled. On one social networking site, a former Dreier employee wrote: “[xxxx] is wondering how he could work for two law firms (Milberg Weiss and Dreier) where both firms’ lead partners were arrested…. Sad commentary on life.”

Update (1:40 AM): Some addenda and corrections:

1. Escrow accounts haven’t been frozen; they’re just short some cash — a lot of cash. One number being bandied about: $38 million.

2. The firm may not be able to make its next payroll, on December 15. There is only $300,000 in the payroll account, and the next payroll is for $2.6 million.

3. Fortress Investment Group is not involved.

4. The holiday party was canceled by an email sent out at around 5 p.m.

Further Update (6:35 PM): Actually, we were right the first time. Fortress Credit Corp., the entity involved in this matter, is a subsidiary of Fortress Investment Group, according to Am Law Daily.

We’ll keep you posted. If you have info to share, feel free to email us. Thanks.

We previously wrote about pro se litigant Julio Mora, who asked the members of the Florida Supreme Court to “kiss his a**hole every time the justice[s] will retire going to their den.” The requested relief was denied, and Mora was sanctioned.

Everyone thinks of Canadians as darn so “nice” — but defendants up there can get saucy too. From the Halifax Chronicle-Herald:

A psychiatric assessment has been ordered for a homeless man who dropped his pants in a Halifax courtroom Friday and invited the judge to perform oral sex on him.

Motion denied. If only he had appeared before this judge.

Joel David Arseneau, 40, was being arraigned in Halifax provincial court before Judge Barbara Beach on two charges of breaching probation or court orders when he let his pants fall to the floor, displaying his underwear.

Sheriff’s deputies hustled Mr. Arseneau out of the courtroom. As they were taking him downstairs to the holding cells, they received word that Judge Beach was prepared to proceed with the arraignment as long as the defendant was willing to keep his pants up.

Glad to hear they have some standards of courtroom decorum up in Halifax.

Hopefully Mr. Arseneau was wearing boxer shorts. Briefs come perilously close to male Speedos.

Man drops his pants in court [Halifax Chronicle-Herald]

Earlier: Pro Se Litigant of the Day: Julio Mora
If the Court Has Gone Down on You, Is Recusal Required?

* Calling all cougars — and the young studs who love them. If you’re a single female who earns more than $500,000 a year (e.g., a Biglaw partner), you should check out this event. [DealBreaker]

* Canadian lawyers are horndogs, too. [Legal Blog Watch]

* “Though I did not think Judge Kopf owed me anything, I was not about to refuse a beer from a federal judge.” [Sentencing Law & Policy]

* Hillary Clinton as Tracy Flick? [Slate TV via Althouse]

* Survivor winner Yul Kwon, with whom we went to law school, contemplates a congressional run. Go Yul! [Washington Examiner]

In an homage to the start of the NHL conference semifinals today, the Lawyer of the Day is James Creighton. Creighton, a Canadian lawyer in the late 1800s, helped found and popularize modern ice hockey while he was a law student at McGill University in Montreal. Here is his stub bio from Wikipedia:

James George Alywin Creighton (Born: 1850 in Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada - Died: 1930) was one the men originally responsible for the early popularization of ice hockey. Creighton developed the game from a similar game known as shinney in Halifax, where (according to some historians) it was developed out of an Irish game called hurley. In 1873 Creighton moved to Montreal to work and eventually attended McGill University, graduating in 1880 with a law degree. There, on March 3, 1875, the first organized game of ice hockey was played and the game’s popularity grew significantly. He practised law with a firm in Montreal. In 1884 Creighton moved to Ottawa to become a law clerk in the Canadian Senate. He formed a team called the Rideau Hall Rebels, and became friends with teammates William and Arthur Stanley, sons of then Canadian Governor General Lord Stanley.

Creighton would happy to know that his sport has been taken over by the American Southeast (the last two Stanley Cup Champions are the Carolina Hurricanes and the Tampa Bay Lightning). Fortunately for you hockey purists out there, the Southeastern teams have already lost this year, and Canada has two chances (Vancouver and Ottawa) to take the Cup back.

[Insert pro forma “dumb Canadians” joke here.]

(And if you’re a plaintiffs’ lawyer who would love to turn this into a class action, you’re too late — a class action lawsuit was filed last week.)

Woman Sick After Eating Recalled Pet Food [Canadian Press]
Class action suit filed against Menu foods [CNN]

Former media magnate Conrad Black is currently on trial in federal court in Chicago. Lord Black (at right) stands accused of fraud, racketeering, tax violations, obstruction of justice, and money laundering — serious stuff. He’s being defended by Edward Greenspan, one of Canada’s most colorful trial attorneys.

Greenspan — who went to law school with Black, by the way — can already claim the distinction of being “among Canada’s most famous lawyers.” And now “Fast Eddie” can add a new prize to his mantle: ATL Lawyer of the Day!!!

Greenspan recently got benchslapped in open court by a judicial hottie — and he clearly deserves some recognition for this achievement. For the gory details, we refer you to our big sibling, DealBreaker.

Congratulations, Mr. Greenspan! We look forward to more antics from you as the trial progresses.

Conrad Black Defense’s Routine Needs Tweaking [DealBreaker]
Où est Monsieur Black? [DealBreaker]

We previously issued a request for any and all information, however trivial, about Gera Grinberg — the mysterious Sullivan & Cromwell associate who worked closely with Aaron Charney, plaintiff in Charney v. S&C. We received a few responses.

The tidbits we received are rather insignificant. But considering how secretive Gera Grinberg appears to be — neither we nor the many MSM reporters on the scene have managed to dig up anything major on him — we regard these factoids as a minor coup.

The answer to the question “What’s Gera Grinberg really like?” is a more closely guarded secret than the identity of Valerie Plame. Okay, bad example; but you get the point. Anyway, here are our five factoids:

1. People who have worked with Gera Grinberg describe him as “a nice guy.” Normally this wouldn’t be worth mentioning. But considering the high a**hole quotient in S&C’s M&A group, it’s significant.

2. Gera lives in a luxury apartment development in Jersey City’s Hudson River waterfront district — a relatively easy commute to S&C’s downtown offices.

3. Grinberg went to school in Canada — Kwantlen University College in British Columbia, followed by the University of British Columbia Faculty of Law — but he was born in Eastern Europe (Ukraine, upon information and belief).

4. Gera is heterosexual, and he has — or at least he had (we don’t know the current status of the relationship) — a girlfriend. Said girlfriend is also a lawyer; we don’t know where she works.

5. As far as we know, Gera Grinberg is still on paid leave from Sullivan & Cromwell — and apparently remains on the payroll, since he’s still on the S&C website.

(Recall that when Aaron Charney was finally fired by S&C, well after he filed his pro se lawsuit, his bio was removed from the firm website faster than Alexandra Korry can hurl a stapler.)

Are these earth-shattering revelations? Hardly. But considering Gera Grinberg’s status as International Man of Mystery, we deserve credit for unearthing even these measly scraps.

If you have any more information about Gera Grinberg to add, you know where to reach us. Thanks.

Gera Grinberg bio [Sullivan & Cromwell]

Earlier: Prior ATL coverage of Gera Grinberg (scroll down)

According to the recent lawsuit filed by Aaron Charney, Sullivan & Cromwell thinks that Canadians are “irrelevant.”

We have a different view of our neighbors to the north. We think Canucks are horny. And pretty damn funny.

This music video, Promiscuous Firm, is from the 2007 University of Alberta Law Show. And it’s far more entertaining — and well-produced — than any video we’ve seen from a U.S. law school’s annual show or roast.

(Yes, even the Tim Wu video.)

Here’s the clip. It’s great from about 1:30 onwards (or 3:00 if you’re watching “backwards”):

Best double entendre, from the attractive female hiring partner (around the 2:20 mark):

I’m a big firm, I can handle myself
But if I have an opening, I may need your help.

Indeed.

Promiscuous Firm [YouTube]

If Aaron Charney’s lawsuit against Sullivan & Cromwell is to be believed, some S&C lawyers think that Canadians are “irrelevant.”

Feel free to debate the relevance in Canadians in the comments. One thing that can be said for them, though, is that their lawyers have pretty good sex scandals.

From an article in the Toronto Star, by the provocatively named Tracey Tyler (who is a guy for all we know):

The former head of the governing body for Ontario lawyers has been suspended from practising for 60 days after admitting to a sexual affair with a client. George Hunter, 59, offered an emotional apology to his colleagues, family and ex-lover yesterday after pleading guilty to professional misconduct.

The irony here is too rich. Maybe all those years of administering slaps on the wrists to lawyers who improperly slept with clients got Hunter thinking, “Maybe I should give this a whirl?”[FN 1]

The relationship ended abruptly after Hunter asked X.Y. to meet him at an Ottawa restaurant, where he informed her that during the time they had been sexually involved, he had also had affairs with two other women….

In a move that might be worthy of entry in the annals of unromantic gestures, Hunter, just before disclosing those affairs, presented X.Y. with a copy of section 2.04 of the law society’s Rules of Professional Conduct.

It deals with conflicts of interest between lawyers and clients. Hunter wanted X.Y. to acknowledge that she had read it….

And THIS is why George Hunter is ATL’s Lawyer of the Day. Say what you will about Hunter, but the man was a LAWYER — to the bitter and embarrassing end.

[FN1] We say “improperly” because, as noted by the Globe and Mail, “[t]here are no professional or statutory rules in Canada which prohibit lawyers from having sexual relations with clients. [There are simply] conflict of interest codes which restrict lawyers from sexual relations with clients without informed consent and when the relationship might harm the client’s interests.”

In this case, Hunter admitted to misconduct. So there’s no claim that his affair — or the two other affairs he had while having affair #1 — were above board.

Sex with client sinks top lawyer [Toronto Star]
Ex-Law Society official suspended for affair with client [Globe & Mail]
Law Society of Upper Canada investigates former Treasurer [The Lawyers Weekly]
George D. Hunter bio [Borden Ladner Gervais]

We’ve been running the same still photo of Aaron Charney, the plaintiff in Charney v. Sullivan & Cromwell, over and over again. You’re probably sick and tired of seeing his mug (appealing though it may be).

But now we have more to offer you. If you’d like to see and hear an animated Aaron Charney, to make your own judgment of his credibility, you’re in luck.

Aaron Charney has given an on-air interview to Report on Business Television, Canada’s leading business news television channel. The segment was titled “Aaron and Goliath.” Check it out here (around the 44th minute of the broadcast).

It’s quite interesting. And, of course, they go into the subject of anti-Canadian animus.

We’d like to hear your thoughts on the video. Please place them in the comments. Thanks.

SqueezePlay [RobTV.com (video)]

Earlier: Prior ATL coverage of Charney v. Sullivan & Cromwell (scroll down)

Are you a gay law student or lawyer? Are you thinking about possibly working at the New York powerhouse law firm of Sullivan & Cromwell?

Before you apply to S&C, you might want to first check out this complaint, filed today in the New York Supreme Court (a trial court, despite the misleading name).

Allegations of discrimination against gays AND Canadians (there’s a difference); a headshot of the handsome plaintiff; and a link to the full complaint. All this and more awaits you, after the jump.

We tend to think of Canadians as such softies progressives. They have universal health care. They allow same-sex marriage. They don’t have the death penalty, and their criminal justice system is kinder and gentler than ours.

At least most of the time. Sometimes individual judges go off the reservation. Last year, a judge in Canada instructed a jury “to retire to the jury room… and then to return to the court with a verdict of guilty.”

Now we get this story, via Criminal Review, a Canadian criminal law blog:

There are jury instructions, and then there are jury instructions. Shades of Krieger (comment).

The accused had been charged with robbery and abduction of a child after hijacking and then driving off in the complainant’s car with the complainant’s child still strapped in the back seat. Apparently the trial judge thought this was enough to demonstrate the offences proven “as a matter of law.”

Not surprisingly, the appellate court saw things a little differently. From their opinion, ordering a new trial:

After the trial judge charged the jury, the jury returned with a question. It could be inferred from the jury’s question that they were concerned that [defendant] Maharaj was not aware of the baby in the car and that he did not have the requisite intention to commit the offences of abduction. However, the trial judge instructed them that “intention is proven,” thereby removing this element of the offence from their consideration.

Trial by jury isn’t the only way to run a criminal justice system. But if you’re going to bother with a jury, and drag citizens’ asses into court for it, you might as well give them something to do while over there (besides the crossword).

R. v. Maharaj [CriminalReview.ca]
R. v. Maharaj [Court of Appeal for Ontario]

Earlier: Criminal Justice, Canadian Style

* Thou shalt not kidnap your child to keep her from getting married. [CNN]

* This really happened? [CNN]

* Supreme Court takes antitrust case involving investment banks. [New York Times]

* Specter introduces legislation designed to blunt the effects of the Thompson memo. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Same-sex marriage still legal, eh? [Reuters via Yahoo!]

At the White House:

* On the heels of Christopher Oprison and Cheryl Stanton, former Wilmer Hale partner Paul Eckert joins the White House Counsel’s Office.

Lateral Moves:

* Nicholas H. Politan, to Gibson Dunn & Crutcher (NY), from Bingham McCutchen, where he served as co-head of the project and structured finance group.

(Wild guess: He’s the son of former federal judge Nicholas H. Politan (D.N.J.).)

* IP litigator Duane David-Hough, to Fish & Richardson, from Ropes & Gray (NY).

A few more moves, plus links, after the jump.

* A rather innocuous profile of New York’s new first lady, ex-attorney Silda Wall Spitzer (who was an up-and-coming corporate superstar at Skadden, but aren’t they all). She was previously married to a Harvard Law classmate for 29 days. Another HLS classmate, Jim Cramer, thinks she’s pretty, and the journalist probably does not understand the notion of billable hours. [New York Times]

* They’re much stricter about using office services for personal use up north. [The Globe and Mail]

* A headbutt is fined $15,000, and a groin-kneeing $25,000. If I were a pro athelete, I’d say that was an extra $10,000 well spent. [Seattle Post-Intelligencer]

* You can still stand firm and refuse to hand over your taxes. After all, you have balls and they don’t. [Washington Post via TaxProf Blog]

The United States and Canada are playing “hot potato” with sex offender Malcolm Watson. Here’s the latest development in the story (which we’ve been following):

An American teacher allowed to serve probation in Ontario for a misdemeanour sex offence was never “exiled” to Canada as was widely reported, the U.S. judge who approved the deal said yesterday.

Even before hearing a motion seeking to amend Malcolm Watson’s probation terms, Judge Thomas Kolbert made a point of addressing the political firestorm ignited by reports that a U.S. sex offender had been “banished” to Canada.

“This court never banished nor exiled Mr. Watson to Canada,” Judge Kolbert said.

Nevertheless, because of the resulting media uproar, the prosecution filed a motion seeking to amend Watson’s probation terms — to make him do his probation in Erie County, New York. The motion is under submission; the parties have three weeks to provide the judge with more information.

How does Mr. Watson feel about possibly having to serve out his sentence in the United States?

Outside the court, defence lawyer Tom Eoannou warned that if Mr. Watson is forced to stay in the U.S., he might yet force a trial.

So Watson hates us. He’s a Canadian, all right.

Sex Offender Not ‘Exiled’ to Canada, Judge Says [Canada Press via How Appealing]

Earlier: Canada to U.S.: Please Send Your Pervs to Mexico
Because Canada Is Suffering from a Pervert Shortage