Career Alternatives

Career Alternatives: An Attorney Chef? That’s So Crazy It Just Might Work

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We get a lot of emails about bad attorney jobs posted on Craigslist. Most of them are sad, but in a dull, non-newsworthy, way. Occasionally something particularly outrageous comes our way, like the Legal Baller or an ad possibly written by a doomsday cult.

But rarely do we see the Craigslist posting that appears fairly absurd on first glance, but then, the longer you look at it, makes you start to wonder, “Hey, that might just be pretty awesome.” Keep reading for a job posting from earlier this week that might interest attorneys who like their justice served hot, with a side of sweet potato fries…

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Why Didn’t a Lawyer Think of This?

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What did we do in a world before we could find out if Tree Wardens had their own logo in fewer than two seconds?

Usually only people who run for president like Mitt Romney are allowed to run for office despite not having a job. Down ticket, you usually have to be “a something” before voters will take you seriously. This morning, there was a nice story on Am Law Daily about an associate, Justin Wagner, who is taking a leave of absence from Weil to run for New York State Senate.

That’s how it’s supposed to work: have job, pause job, ask the people to elect you to another job.

Well, one Massachusetts woman is turning that on its head, and I’m not talking about Elizabeth Warren….

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Caption Contest Winner: You Have to Sing for Your Supper

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Last week, we asked our readers to submit possible captions for this photo:

Over the weekend, you voted on the finalists, and now it’s time to announce the winner of our most recent caption contest….

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Caption Contest Finalists: You Have To Sing for Your Supper

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Earlier this week, we asked readers to submit possible captions for this photo:

Let’s have a look at what our readers came up with, and then vote on the finalists….

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Caption Contest: You Have To Sing for Your Supper

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We admit it. We have a certain fondness for poking fun at organizations like the Law School Admission Council, the folks who help run the law school show. Because, as you all know, it has been getting harder and harder to make a successful living with a law degree. That’s why we are excited, courtesy of a Chicago tipster, to have visual evidence of a new and innovative money-making use for the Law School Admission Council, or at least some of the organization’s giveaway swag.

The subject of this photo is not necessarily a lawyer, but let’s just say he is music to our ears.

Here’s the photo for our latest caption contest….

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Is A Law Degree Still The Best Way To Get Into Politics?

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Going to law school worked out great for this guy.

And now we come to the real reason I, and so many others, went to law school: I wanted to go into politics. Before I was married, before my father’s name recognition spiked, before I was in debt, before I realized I had no talent asking people for money, I thought elected office was in my future and a law degree was an important credential.

Don’t act like I’m the only one. For as long as anybody can remember, a training in law has been viewed as a good foundation for an eventual career in politics. Even if you never practice, it makes sense that a person who would make laws would have a fundamental understanding of how laws work. A law degree also suggests a certain respect for the rules, a useful quality for those who would be in charge of the rules. In the modern era, law has been the best “career” for would-be politicians to start out in, and historically only military service has been a more common way to elected office.

But maybe that’s all changing? Catherine Rampell of the New York Times has a great piece showing that while lawyers are still the dominant profession among our senators and congresspeople, there are fewer former lawyers running Washington than there have been for a generation.

So, you know, just add one more way in which law school isn’t as valuable as it used to be…

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Career Alternatives for Attorneys: Truck Driver

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Gainful employment nine months after graduation, FTW.

We cover the gloom-and-doom in the legal job market quite well here at Above the Law. But there are happy stories out there too — and not just for the top graduates of top law schools.

This is the story of Fred (not his real name; he asked to remain anonymous). Fred graduated in 2011 from a well-ranked but not super-elite law school — a top 50 school, but not a top three, top six, or even “T14″ school. He was not at the top of the class, nor was he on the law review. Many of Fred’s similarly situated classmates are unemployed or underemployed, drifting from one contract-attorney or paralegal-type job to another.

Fred is much better off than many of them. He has a job that he enjoys. He works for two weeks, followed by two weeks of vacation. He makes somewhere between $60,000 and $100,000 a year, with the exact amount depending on how much he wants to work. And if things go according to plan, in a few years he could be earning $250,000 a year (or more).

Right now some of you are dying to know: What does Fred do, and how can I get this job?

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Maryland Law’s Response Highlights Career Services ‘Expertise’

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Yesterday, we brought you news of a job opportunity that is currently available on the University of Maryland School of Law’s Symplicity job bank. When we first wrote about the listing, we called it a “career services nightmare.” After all, the job had more to do with orange parking cones than the law.

As it turns out, the powers that be at Maryland Law weren’t very happy that Above the Law called them out. Instead of hanging their heads in shame for trying to sell a job as a parking garage manager to its students, the career development office issued a vigorous defense of this exciting opportunity in vehicular supervision and coordination.

The email was written by the assistant dean for career development herself. What did she have to say?

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Maryland Law’s Tuition Is Down, But So Is the Quality of Its Job Listings

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Back in December 2010, we reported that tuition at the University of Maryland School of Law (now known as the Francis King Carey School of Law) would not be subject to the four percent hike for the 2011-2012 academic year that was thrust upon the rest of the programs doing business at the university’s Baltimore campus.

It was rumored that the law school’s dean, Phoebe Haddon, fought valiantly to keep tuition from rising due to students’ hefty debt loads and the “impact of the economic downturn on the legal employment market.” At the time, we gave Maryland Law major kudos for protecting its students from tuition increases. Now, we wonder if a just little more tuition money would have prevented this career services nightmare.

As it turns out, even students who attend a top 50 law school are in danger of landing awful jobs, especially when the career development office is offering up gems like this one….

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A Model Law Student: This Sexy Sooner Hits the Books Hard

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Our law student is hotter.

When you think of Oklahoma, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? For some it’s a Broadway musical, for others, it’s agriculture, and for others still, it’s football. But what about beautiful, intelligent women?

Today, we’ve got a story for our readers about a law student with some really big… brains. A tipster notified us about this sexy Sooner and the double life she leads: she’s a second-year law student, but in her free time, she’s a model who’s worked at some of the finest breastaurants in the business.

Who is this lovely law student, and which law school does she attend? More importantly, what does she look like? Semi-NSFW pics, or it didn’t happen….

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Is Your Career Services Office This Lazy?

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Insert face of law school student above.

Instead of hiring a new professor to teach Cross-Cultural Comparison of Masturbatory Prohibitions, I want law schools to start paying six-figure salaries to the people they hire to work in their career services offices. I want U.S. News to include the number of CSO professionals and money spent on CSOs as data points in their law school rankings. I want deans to start asking rich alumni if they would like to donate to help fight mental disability and extreme laziness in career services offices.

Because honestly, the lack of effort put in by career services professionals at the nation’s law schools really seems to be out of hand. Maybe they’ve just been collectively beaten down by the years of terrible job prospects and the throngs of students in need of help. Maybe they believe that there really is nothing they can do, and they are significantly more worried about protecting their own jobs than finding jobs for eager law students. Maybe the lack of institutional support and respect for their efforts makes them feel like second-class citizens whenever the Professor of Impractical Studies That Serve No Clients walks into the room.

I don’t know why we’re here, but when you can’t even trust your CSO to effectively cull Symplicity to remove stupid and insulting job prospects like the ones below, it’s time to change the entire approach to law school career services….

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Congratuations to the 2012 Presidential Management Fellows Finalists

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Here at Above the Law, we try to notify our readers about job opportunities for law students and lawyers. Some of these positions are less desirable and some are more desirable, but hey: in this economy, a job is a job.

(At least as long as it pays. Some jobs don’t, of course.)

Back in the fall, we reminded you about the application deadline for the Presidential Management Fellows Program (PMF). In case you’re not familiar with the PMF program, check out the official website.

Now we bring you an update about the program….

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