Man, it’s been so long since I actually had to read every comment in search of T-shirt worthy wit and humor that I almost forgot how much I hate some of you guys. I can’t wait till my vacation when I get a week away from you guys and I can just sit in bed and roll around in my “too Harvard degreez.”
Do you know anybody who has called a lawyer based on a subway ad?
Like, I know these clients must exist. There are too many lawyers who advertise on subways for the effort to be useless. So there must be people who read these signs and think, “I should take that number down.”
It’s a good thing for Above the Law. Subway lawyer ads make for great caption contests. Remember this one for something called the Beasley School of Law?
This next ad makes for a good caption contest and a good concert promotion….
* In America, we’re trying to get official recognition for gay marriage. In Scotland, they’re trying to get official recognition for weddings performed by Jedi Knights. Please, by all means, proceed to stroke each other’s lightsabers over this exciting nerd news. [Volokh Conspiracy]
* Oh my god, this is something I’m definitely going to have to sit down and read, it looks so salacious and — oh. *eyeroll* This just in from the subtitle letdown department…. [Overlawyered]
* A political consultant in Nebraska apparently got himself fired because he called Sen. Danielle Conrad a C-U-Next-Tuesday on his Facebook page. That was way harsh, Tai. [Jezebel]
* Click here to listen to Professor Brian Tamanaha and Dean Lawrence Mitchell talk about rethinking the future of legal education. Tamanaha thinks the tuition is too damn high, whereas Dean Mitchell simply thinks that “life is expensive.” Not even kidding, he really said that. [Associate's Mind]
* At Target, you can definitely expect more and pay less, but that’s probably because your money’s allegedly being stolen out of the cash register. [Legal Juice]
* And just because I love just about everything that Lindsay Lohan does because she’s the hottest of all messes, here’s a timeline of her mug shots ranked in order of her sex appeal. I love that we live in a world where such a thing actually exists! [Gawker]
– Lindsay Lohan, muttering under her breath in frustration during her court appearance yesterday after her lawyer, Mark Heller — a man who was previously scolded by Judge James Dabney for being “incompetent” as to California law — kept speaking even though the starlet had already directed him to shut up, numerous times.
(Don’t believe us? We’ve got the video to prove it.)
April’s right around the corner. Earlier today I finalized my taxes for last year. It’s never a pleasant task, but at least I had a better go of it than Stephen Baldwin.
Baldwin, the youngest of the Baldwin brothers, ran headlong into a mess of money troubles over the years and responded by ducking out on his taxes. To be precise, $350,000 worth of New York state taxes.
Now, according to his lawyer, the actor has reached an agreement with prosecutors that may not “restore” him, but is certainly better than the alternative…
Another day, another paternity suit for a basketball legend, and this time, it’s some regular old baby mama drama (not this delusional “LeBromination” business). Apparently Michael Jordan is the latest NBA star to fall prey to a scandalous request for a paternity test. Of course, this is nothing new for His Airness — he’s had to deal with several such allegations from women claiming they dribbled his balls.
But in this iteration of what would likely be the most-watched Maury Povich episode of all time, thanks to the wonders of the internet, we’ve got a teenager with a video message plea for more Twitter followers, and also for his alleged father to take a more active role in his life….
Okay, we can all stop worrying. Lindsay Lohan’s new attorney Mark Heller is pretty sure he knows how to “fix” the actress and he’s written a letter to the prosecutors extolling his power to succeed where all others have failed. And it involves establishing the “Lindsay Lohan Foundation.” I’m eagerly awaiting the mission statement for that organization.
The judge is not pleased with Heller’s letter. The exact term used in reports of the judge’s reaction is “pissed.” Pissing off the judge within the first month on the case. Hey, Lindsay, maybe Heller isn’t the best choice for representation. I mean, who is this guy?
Mark Heller’s decades-long legal career is described by observers as publicity-seeking and erratic.
Oh, wait. So maybe this is actually a match made in Heaven to work with LiLo….
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The holiday season is upon us, and yet again, you have no idea what to get for the fickle lawyer in your life. We’re here to help. Even if your bonus check hasn’t arrived yet, any one of the gifts we’ve highlighted here could be a worthy substitute until your employer decides to make it rain.
We’ve got an eclectic selection for you to choose from, so settle in by that stack of documents yet to be reviewed and dig in…
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