Celebrities

* There’s been a changing of the guard at Sidley Austin. Carter Phillips, one of our nation’s preeminent appellate advocates, is now the sole chair of the firm’s executive committee after a one-year stint as co-chair. Congrats! [The Recorder]

* You should really try to make the most of your summers during law school, even after your first year. Because duh, in case you weren’t aware, it’ll probably help you to get a job later on. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News & World Report]

* It looks like the trolls attorneys behind Prenda Law got benchslapped in the worst of ways — complete with a multitude of Star Trek references. We’ll likely have more on this later today. [Ars Technica]

* The California Supreme Court just ruined everyone’s high, because it ruled that cities and counties can ban medical marijuana dispensaries. Smoke ‘em while you’ve got ‘em, stoners. [Associated Press]

* Justin Bieber is being sued for copyright infringement, along with his musical mentor, Usher. Tween girl mob: ASSEMBLE! Defend your pop idol’s honor; after all, he just needed somebody to love. [Reuters]

I dunno. Some old pilgrim?

Zach Galifianakis, while acting in a Game of Thrones game show sketch on Saturday Night Live, in response to a visual-clue question from Jaime Lannister (Nikolaj Coster-Waldau) that asked Galifianakis to identify Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg by name.

(If you’re interested, you can watch the clip from this episode, after the jump.)

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With finals underway and graduation just a few weeks ahead, law students are left with only two things to bitch and moan about: their job/debt situations, and their commencement speakers. Law school graduation is supposed to be a day that will forever be etched in people’s memories; they don’t want to remember that they were seething with rage or slumping their shoulders in disappointment. They just want to be happy.

But apparently the lawyers of the future are incapable of that emotion. In the past, soon-to-be law grads have gotten so pissy about their law school’s selection of speaker that they’ve written open letters, donned protest buttons, and even organized commencement walkouts.

We’ve heard from several of our readers regarding their schools’ speaker picks, and students from a certain high-ranking law school (but not T14, at least in our own rankings) are REALLY unhappy….

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Jose Canseco

hey buddy I also think waterboard and shoot but scalia was clear in hamdi dissent that citizens get due process.

– Former MLB player and self-confessed juice head Jose Canseco, explaining to Jack Welch, the former CEO of General Electric, via Twitter the reason why Dzhokhar Tsarnaev shouldn’t be treated as an enemy combatant.

James Franco

Gossip blogs are frankly not the most accurate sources upon which to base one’s due diligence.

Jura Zibas of Wilson Elser, one of James Franco’s lawyers, noting in a court filing that an attempt to serve her client at an address gleaned from an online celebrity gossip site was laughable.

(As it turns out, the address was wrong, and Franco’s lawyers successfully had the case dismissed.)

Legally Blonde is a movie that inspired many a ditzy sorority girl to apply to law school — obviously the appeal of wearing a pink power suit to court was just too great for them to resist. Let’s face it: whether you like it or not, Elle Woods has become an icon of sorts for a generation of women who never realized that they could be smart and pretty at the same time. For that reason (among many others), she was able to make it to the Final Four of our Fictional Lawyer Madness competition.

Is all people see when they look at you blonde hair and big boobs? Then it’s highly likely that you, too, can get into Harvard Law on a whim! What, like it’s hard?

Unfortunately, there are some legal issues that not even women like Elle Woods can talk themselves out of, and we’ve got a potpourri of disorderly conduct allegations for you to feast your eyes upon….

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* With the capture of Boston bombing suspect Dzhokhar Tsarnaev, many legal questions are being asked, like if he’ll be Mirandized, where he’ll be tried, and if he’ll be considered an enemy combatant. [New York Times]

* Thanks for kicking this keg, Mr. Baer: the Department of Justice and Anheuser-Busch InBev have settled their antitrust differences with respect to beer brewery’s planned acquisition of Grupo Modelo. [Legal Times]

* Which firm has a “generous tuition reimbursement” program? And by “generous,” we mean 100% of law school tuition, which is awesome. We may have more on this later today. [Capital Business / Washington Post]

* Stan Chesley, the “master of disaster,” is retiring — not because he wants to, but because he’s disbarred in Kentucky and surrendered his Ohio license before the state could take it from him. [WSJ Law Blog (sub. req.)]

* California may soon follow in New York’s footsteps when it comes a pro bono mandate before bar admission, but the New Jersey Bar Association has an active hit out on the idea. [National Law Journal]

* In an effort to avoid a trial that would’ve lasted longer than their sham marriage did in the first place, fauxlebrity Kim Kardashian and NBA player Kris Humphries settled their divorce last week. [Reuters]

* Morris Kramer, an M&A pioneer and part of Skadden’s “Fab Four,” RIP. [DealBook / New York Times]

Last week, we asked readers to submit possible captions for this photo:

You then voted on the finalists. Now it’s time to announce the winner of our caption contest….

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Man, it’s been so long since I actually had to read every comment in search of T-shirt worthy wit and humor that I almost forgot how much I hate some of you guys. I can’t wait till my vacation when I get a week away from you guys and I can just sit in bed and roll around in my “too Harvard degreez.”

Earlier this week, we asked you for possible captions for this photo:

One commenter already figured out my nefarious plan: “This is an April Fool’s trick to see how many of us know Justin Bieber songs…” But most of you fell for it….

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I bet he gets tons of clients.

Do you know anybody who has called a lawyer based on a subway ad?

Like, I know these clients must exist. There are too many lawyers who advertise on subways for the effort to be useless. So there must be people who read these signs and think, “I should take that number down.”

It’s a good thing for Above the Law. Subway lawyer ads make for great caption contests. Remember this one for something called the Beasley School of Law?

This next ad makes for a good caption contest and a good concert promotion….

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