We’re about to take all take a poll, and how you answer this poll will once and for all determine whether or not you are a good person.
I’m serious. You can lie on the poll if you want to, but you’ll always know how you truly felt. If you go one way, you are a good person. If you go another way, you are a soulless bastard. I offer no third option.
Although this revolves around a common legal situation, you don’t even have to be a lawyer to take and learn from this test poll.
There was a bomb threat this morning at the Fulton County Court complex. The threat was deemed credible enough to place the courthouse on lockdown for an hour this morning. But the court has reopened and everybody appears to be safe. The Atlanta Journal Constitution reports:
The sheriff’s office issued a “shelter in place” order at 11:41 a.m., directing everyone to interior rooms that are away from windows, [Fulton County Superior Court spokesman Don Plummer] said.
Fulton sheriff’s deputies, along with other law enforcement officers used bomb sniffing dogs to inspect the three-building complex, Plummer said.
Authorities believe the threat was made to disrupt a gang trial taking place at the courthouse today…
No, we didn’t forget about our little caption contest. But we almost did, due to the paucity of entries. The runaway winner: Schopenhauerian, our “celebrity commenter” here at ATL.
Here is his — or her? — winning entry, to accompany the photo shown above:
Meet legal supergeniuses Emily and Mandy, the youngest clerks in the history of the Supreme Court.
After earning her JD from Harvard Law summa cum laude, Emily previously clerked for Judge Kozinski. Mandy, first in her class at Stanford Law, served in the office of Solicitor General Paul Clement and went on to clerk for Judge Luttig. Emily’s interests include comparative constitutional law, baton twirling, 18th century German literature, and roller skating. She has also written extensively on all aspects of international arbitration law. Mandy specializes in federal jurisdiction and statutory interpretation, and is the world’s leading authority on “My Little Pony” collectibles.
What clinched it for us: the “My Little Pony” shout-out. We have a weakness for all things MLP.*
And Schopenhauerian gets bonus points for the superior graphics skills demonstrated in this photoshop masterpiece:
Yes, ladies, he really is this handsome. Sorry, he’s taken. From left to right: Professor William Birdthistle; Mark Schneider, an AUSA in Chicago; Ninth Circuit Judge Diarmuid O’Scannlain; Brian Murray (OT 2002/Scalia); Deputy Assistant Attorney General Jonathan Cohn (OT 2000/Thomas); Carol Murray (we think); Cindy Zmijewski Demers (in profile); Ryan W. Bounds, of the Office of Legal Policy (and the Office of Sartorial Counsel).
For those of you who don’t like eye candy (of the admittedly blurry kind), you’ll be happy to know that this is the last in our series of photo essay posts about the historic Pioneer Courthouse, in Portland, Oregon. The prior installments can be accessed here (scroll down).
The latest batch of pictures, showing former O’Scannlain law clerks on a judge-led tour of the renovated Pioneer Courthouse, appear after the jump.
The Ninth Circuit seal, in the Pioneer Courthouse library.
This post is the third in a series of photo posts, built around pictures we took when we attended the O’Scannlain law clerk reunion in Portland, Oregon, last weekend. The first two posts, which provide background on the reunion and the historic Pioneer Courthouse, appear here and here.
Our two earlier posts focused primarily on the public areas of the building. This post takes off where the last two left off, containing pictures of Judge Diarmuid O’Scannlain’s chambers, plus more pictures of visiting law clerks touring the premises. Happy viewing!
This post is continued from The Pioneer Courthouse: A Photo Essay (Part 1). For background on this glorious historic courthouse, located in the heart of Portland, Oregon, we refer you back to that post.
For additional pics, skip ahead to the jump.
The festivities of the O’Scannlain law clerk reunion weekend, held in honor of Judge Diarmuid O’Scannlain’s20th anniversary on the Ninth Circuit bench, began on Friday night with a reception in Judge O’Scannlain’s chambers. They’re located on the third floor of the beautiful Pioneer Courthouse (see above), in downtown Portland, Oregon.
The Pioneer Courthouse, a national historic landmark, is the oldest federal building in the Pacific Northwest, as well as the second-oldest federal courthouse west of the Mississippi. First built in 1875, it recently reopened to the public after an extensive renovation and seismic upgrade. (Earthquakes make us glad we live on the East Coast.)
After the jump, some photographs of this magnificent building (along with visiting law clerks, who ain’t too shabby themselves). This is the first post in a multi-part series — ’cause these photos take forever to upload, and we didn’t want to keep you waiting for hours. Enjoy!
Saline? Silicone? Bronze? Or none of the above?
In response to this post from yesterday, we received the following emaill:
I think you’ve misrepresented the caryatids in the foyer of the Pioneer Courthouse — I believe they’re cedar rather than bronze.
Frequently we just correct errors within the original post (so please refresh your browser right before emailing us about a typo or other mistake). But we felt this correction was worth highlighting given the importance of the subject matter.
In addition, we learned a new word from this email: caryatid. From context, we guessed that “caryatids” was a highfalutin term for “tits.”
But we were wrong. It’s actually an architectural term referring to “[a] supporting column sculptured in the form of a draped female figure.” How about that? A nice bit of trivia, sure to make it into a future Judge Boggs clerkship application quiz.
A challenge for the bored: Work “caryatid” into your next conference call.
(About to chastise us for not relying upon the Oxford English Dictionary? Please buy us an online subscription to the OED before lodging your complaint. Thank you.) Caryatid [The American Heritage Dictionary of the English Language] Earlier: Lady Justice: They’re Real, and They’re… Spectacular!
This impressive bronze bust statue occupies the foyer of the Pioneer Courthouse, in Portland, Oregon:
If John Ashcroft were still Attorney General, however, it might look more like this: Correction: It appears that we were wrong about those breasts being bronze. Please see here. Sorry about that!
“We’ve voted to deny the petition for a writ of mandamus. NOW can we have our milk and cookies?”
We had a delightful time this past weekend in Portland, Oregon, where we attended Ninth Circuit Judge Diarmuid O’Scannlain’s law clerk reunion, in celebration of his 20th anniversary on the bench. We’ll be blogging about the festivities — and posting photographs from them — over the next few days.
We’ll kick things off with this photo of us (see below), which taken in the library of Portland’s Pioneer Courthouse. As you might have guessed, our provocative pose is an homage to America’s hottest ERISA lawyer, Professor Bruce Wolk.
Please enter suggested captions in the comments. We’ll declare a “winner” of the contest, and highlight other personal favorites, later today (or tomorrow, or whenever we get around to it).
We currently have a number of active openings for associate roles at US and UK firms in HK / China, Singapore and two new in-house openings. As always, please feel free to reach out to us at asia@kinneyrecruiting.com in order to get details of current openings in Asia, as well as to discuss the Asia markets in general and what we expect for openings later this year. Our Evan Jowers and Robert Kinney will be in Beijing the week of March 25 and Evan Jowers will be in Hong Kong the week of April 1, if you would like to meet them in person.
The US associate openings we have in law firms are in the usual areas of M&A, cap markets, FCPA / white collar litigation, finance, and project finance. The most urgent of our top tier (top 15 US or magic circle) law firm openings in Asia (among many other firm openings that we have in Asia) are as follows:
• 2nd to 5th year mandarin fluent M&A associates needed in Beijing and Hong Kong at several firms;
• Korean fluent 2nd to 4th year cap markets associate needed in Hong Kong;
• 2nd to 5th year Japanese fluent M&A associates needed in Tokyo;
• 4th to 6th year mandarin fluent cap markets associate needed in Hong Kong;
• 2nd to 4th year M&A / cap markets mix associate needed in Singapore.
In a land that is right here and in a time that is right now, a technology has arisen so powerful that it can replace basic human document review. Is it time to bow down before our new robot overlords?
First, here’s a little story about me: my life in the legal world began as a paralegal. My first case was a GIANT patent infringement case that was already six years old and had involved as many as five companies, multiple US courts, the ITC and an international standards committee. I knew nothing about any of this.
On my first day, my supervisor (a paralegal with at least eight other cases driving her crazy) sat me down in front of a Concordance database with a 100,000+ patents and patent file histories. “Code these,” she said. I learned that “coding”, for the purposes of this exercise, meant manually typing the inventor’s name, the title of the patent, the assignee, the file date, and other objective data for each document. I worked on that project – and only that project – for at least the first six months of my job. After a week or so, time began to blur.
What I know, in retrospect and with absolutely certainty, is that as time began to blur, so did my judgment. So did my attention to detail. If you could tell me that I did not make at least one mistake a day – one inconsistent spelling, one reversed day and month, one incorrectly spaced title – I frankly would need to see your evidence. I would not believe it. The human mind is trainable but it is not a machine.
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We’re about to take all take a poll, and how you answer this poll will once and for all determine whether or not you are a good person. 
Continue reading “Best (Or Perhaps Worst) Courtroom Entrance In The World”
