After driving her SUV the wrong way down a freeway, famine victim reality TV star Nicole Richie was arrested yesterday for driving under the influence (Vicodin and pot, allegedly). Perhaps she’s gearing up for “The Simple Life: Behind Bars”?
Seriously, though, we doubt Richie will do any prison time. She’s in the capable hands of Howard L. Weitzman, a prominent criminal defense lawyer who has represented oodles of celebrities over the years (e.g., John De Lorean, Michael Jackson, Ozzy Osbourne, and even O.J. Simpson (briefly)).
And this cloud has a silver lining. Now that she has a DUI arrest on her record, Nicole Richie is eligible for a state court judgeship.
Speaking of state judges and DUI arrests, our reader poll is now over. We asked you:
Who acted more stupidly? Judge Patrick Young, for driving under the influence, with a senior colleague as a passenger? Or Chief Judge Jan Fiss, for getting into the car with an inebriated colleague, and then trying to empty his tinnie by the side of the road?
* A unanimous Supreme Court overturns a Ninth Circuit ruling in a criminal (habeas) case. In other news, this morning the sun rose from the east. [New York Times; Washington Post]
* Enron’s Jeff Skilling may get to pass “Go” on his way to jail after all. [WSJ Law Blog]
* BCS vs. the Electoral College: Is the controversy over Florida or Michigan playing Ohio State the college football version of Bush v. Gore? Or perhaps that was the LSU/USC split of 2003-04? [National Journal via MSNBC]
* “Float driver in S.C. Christmas parade charged with drunken driving.” [AP]
* Christmas trees are back up in the Sea-Tac airport. Rabbi Elazar Bogomilsky has said he won’t file a lawsuit. But if somebody else does, the Seattle airport authorities will have to throw in a menorah, a Kikombe cha Umoja, and a snowman. [Seattle Times]
Finding it hard to buckle down for final exams? Check out this motivational poster, from a 2L at Fordham Law School:
That’s the “stick” approach: fail your classes, lose the lucrative Biglaw gig.
From UVA Law School, TJ offers up a “carrot”: recipes for fun legal-themed drinks. Treat yourself to a delicious Rule 12(b)(6) — AFTER you’ve survived your exams. Create your own custom poster [Motivator] These come AFTER [TJ's Double Play]
Judges don’t have enough fun. Overly concerned with “judicial decorum,” they don’t let down their hair very often. They try to hide the reality that, beneath their robes, they’re ordinary people just like the rest of us. Perhaps they fear that this truth might undermine their legitimacy.
But a pair of Illinois state court judges may have taken things too far in the “fun” department:
A judge driving with his boss was charged with drunken driving after a wreck that sent another motorist to the hospital, and the other judge was seen by an officer pouring out a can of beer, police said.
St. Clair County Circuit Judge Patrick Young, 58, was handcuffed and arrested and charged with drunken driving after the Sunday crash, about 20 miles from St. Louis. He refused a sobriety test, authorities said.
Another officer, Jeffrey Sheary, reported seeing Young’s passenger, Chief Judge Jan Fiss, 64, pour out an open beer can on the road and try to hide it in his coat.
If the allegations are true, who acted more stupidly? Judge Young, for driving under the influence, with a senior colleague as a passenger? Or Chief Judge Fiss, for getting into the car with an inebriated colleague, and then trying to empty his tinnie by the side of the road?
* In Breathless, Michel (played by Jean-Paul Belmondo) remarks that the women of Sweden, despite their reputation, are pretty much like women everywhere: there are indeed many pretty ones, but most are plain or ugly. So you can understand why these two busted Swedish cops kept records of the former. [AP via MSNBC]
* Harold and Maude, the sequel — but even creepier. [PhillyBurbs.com]
* Justice really rained on this guy’s parade. [Greenville Online]
* Girls, what do you think position 13 is? (Yeah, you should watch this until the punchline.) [De Novo]
* I once innocently ordered a Strawberry Tsunami at Jamba Juice just days after the December 2004 tsunami. I’m dumb that way. Anyway, this smoothie has long been taken off the menu, but you should still proceed with caution when ordering anything with strawberries. [Los Angeles Times]
* I can’t help but use the phrase, “Who’s your Daddy?” whenever I can do so in total earnestness. [People]
* You have a right to a jury trial, whether you want it or not. [Atlanta Journal-Constitution via How Appealing]
* Santa’s big behind is gonna make kids want to drink beer?. [CNN]
* Now my case is at the Supreme Court, and I know why; because I got high, because I got high, because I got high… [WSJ Law Blog]
* It’s sad when otherwise good people get sucked into the seedy underbelly of the Arizona bingo scene. [MSNBC]
* Nice try, Jane, but a little too late to get your job on the Intelligence Committee back. [Jurist]
A tipster sent us this Craigslist posting, with a query: “I wonder if this gets expensed to clients?”
National law firm with large Los Angeles offices seeks a Barista!!!
Huge law firm with an in-house coffee bar. The hours are Monday-Thursday from 8:30-5:30. You will receive full benefits, parking, etc. Time and a half if overtime is needed.
The firm is looking for someone bright and quick! If you have experience at a coffee shop or other food services company that is a plus. A college student or recent college graduate who is looking for a job 4 days a week would be perfect!
Ivy league caliber firm with top benefits, super casual dress and fun environment.
Please email a formal resume in WORD format. All inquiries 100% confidential.
It’s a brilliant idea on the part of the firm. Keep your associates as heavily caffeinated as possible — and allow them to get their fix without even leaving the building.
Anyone know what firm is in the market for a barista? Update: Based on the comments thus far, Quinn Emanuel is the leading suspect. If this is correct, what happened to their last barista? (Did he or she get promoted to associate, after claiming to have passed the bar?) BARISTA – at Large Law firm [craigslist]
The former, actually. But when it shows up in next year’s Yale Law School course catalog, don’t say we didn’t warn you.
Personally we find beer kinda gross — bitter and foul-tasting. But for those of you who enjoy this beverage, check out this conference, taking place later today at the University of Oregon law school:
It’s not all malt and hops – Oregon’s brewers face an array of legal issues from intellectual property law to fundamental constitutional questions.
The 2006 Law of Beer Symposium features panelists from Oregon’s Rogue Ales and the former director of Oregon Brewer’s Guild.
It takes place on Thursday, November 16 at 7:00 P.M. in Room 110, Knight Law Center, 1515 Agate Street in Eugene. The event is sponsored by the Law and Entrepreneurship Student Association.
The IP angle we can understand, but we’re not sure about the Con Law perspective. Granholm v. Heald was about the interstate shipment of wine, not beer. South Dakota v. Dole isn’t really about beer, but about the drinking age more generally (and the spending power). And we don’t think the wheat being grown in Wickard v. Fillburn was destined to be turned into hefeweizen.
But we haven’t thought a lot about this or researched the subject. Please feel free to enlighten us as to the “fundamental constitutional questions” implicated by chugging an ice-cold Heineken. The Law of Beer [University of Oregon School of Law] Beer Symposium Today at Oregon [TaxProf Blog]
On Friday night, we saw Borat at our local movie theater. We found it hilarious for the first fifteen minutes, before it turned repetitive. That said, there were some impressive set pieces in the second half of the film, such as the hotel room wrestling match.
(We viewed Borat on the recommendation of one of the Elect, and we spotted another in the theater. Supreme Court clerks: They’re just like us!)
If you’d like to know more about how the film was made, including who was in on the joke and who wasn’t, check out this Guide to Borat, from Salon (via How Appealing). According to Salon, most of the people who interacted with Sacha Baron Cohen in the movie were NOT in on the joke.
Commenting on “Lexytime” — our prior post about Borat, concerning two fraternity brothers who are suing the film’s producers — Tortious Malfoy wrote:
If you had seen the movie you would know why they’re suing: they went on a racial rant about how they wish they could still own slaves, women were nothing, and alot of other hostile stuff. Don’t think they’ll be getting much love in the South anytime soon, especially considering the movie’s reach.
Actually, if Borat’s portrayal of the South is even halfway accurate, we think that the plaintiffs might be embraced by southerners (e.g., the people at the rodeo, the gun store owner, etc.).
Having seen Borat, we actually have the opposite reaction to what Tortious Malfoy predicted: We are LESS sympathetic to the fraternity brothers’ lawsuit against 20th Century Fox and One America Productions. The frat boys are recorded drinking, watching porn, and spewing racist and misogynistic statements. And now they’re upset because, among other things, they thought that the movie would only be screened in Europe? Please.
Furthermore, we agree with this commenter at the WSJ Law Blog. In vino veritas. If the frat boys come across as racist and misogynist, well, maybe there’s a reason for that.
We also note that the frat boys’ lawsuit is counterproductive, due to the Robert Steinbuch effect. By filing a lawsuit, the plaintiffs are only highlighting the actions and statements of theirs that they did not want exposed to public view.
The impoverished Romanian villagers who are now thinking about suing over Borat are far more sympathetic than the frat boys. Regardless of the legal merits of the contemplated action, Cohen and the production companies might as well throw some money in the villagers’ direction, especially in light of Borat’s financial success.
A bunch of poor, exploited Romanian villagers are sure to arouse some public sympathy. Especially this man:
Mr Tudorache, a deeply religious grandfather who lost his arm in an accident, was one of those who feels most humiliated. For one scene, a rubber sex toy in the shape of a fist was attached to the stump of his missing arm – but he had no idea what it was.
Borat was number one again at the box office this past weekend, taking in another $28.3 million. Surely Cohen and Fox can afford to do something nice for the villagers. Like buying Mr. Tudorache a fist dildo made of glass, not rubber.
* The plaintiff frat boys are represented by the very handsome Olivier Taillieu. Here’s an excerpt from his unintentionally amusing bio:
[Olivier clerked] for the Honorable A. Wallace Tashima on the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit, one of the most prestigious and sought-after clerkships in the country. Following his clerkships, he entered private practice as a litigator in the Intellectual Property and Technology Department in the Los Angeles office of O’Melveny & Myers, LLP, one of the top 15 law firms in the country as ranked by revenue by The American Lawyer.
In response to our last post about Aquagirl — the Clearly Goatlips Cleary Gottlieb summer associate who stripped down to her underwear and dove into the Hudson River, at a summer associate event — one of you wrote:
Aquagirl was in my bar review class, for the Virginia bar exam. But she is NOT on the list of those who passed the July 2006 VA bar exam. Did she not take the exam? Or did she fail?
There is also the issue of character and fitness. Does jumping in a river render you unfit to practice in the Commonwealth? I trust that Above the Law will find out for us all.
We’re inclined to answer this reader’s query with a “no.” If a single instance of poor, alcohol-clouded judgment were enough to preclude bar admission, then nobody would be left in practice. So please, Virginia bar examiners — give Aquagirl a break.
(Yes, we’re biased — we are big fans of Aquagirl, whom we have declared “magnificent.” And we want to see her succeed in the legal profession, which needs more colorful personalities.)
Update: We’re not alone in wishing Aquagirl well. One of you writes: “She’s actually a really sweet girl, so I hope it’s just that they held her app for C&F (and thus still has a chance of being admitted), and not that she didn’t pass the exam.”
If you can enlighten us about the fate of our favorite summer associate ever — she’s tied for first with this young lady — please drop us a line.
We currently have a number of active openings for associate roles at US and UK firms in HK / China, Singapore and two new in-house openings. As always, please feel free to reach out to us at asia@kinneyrecruiting.com in order to get details of current openings in Asia, as well as to discuss the Asia markets in general and what we expect for openings later this year. Our Evan Jowers and Robert Kinney will be in Beijing the week of March 25 and Evan Jowers will be in Hong Kong the week of April 1, if you would like to meet them in person.
The US associate openings we have in law firms are in the usual areas of M&A, cap markets, FCPA / white collar litigation, finance, and project finance. The most urgent of our top tier (top 15 US or magic circle) law firm openings in Asia (among many other firm openings that we have in Asia) are as follows:
• 2nd to 5th year mandarin fluent M&A associates needed in Beijing and Hong Kong at several firms;
• Korean fluent 2nd to 4th year cap markets associate needed in Hong Kong;
• 2nd to 5th year Japanese fluent M&A associates needed in Tokyo;
• 4th to 6th year mandarin fluent cap markets associate needed in Hong Kong;
• 2nd to 4th year M&A / cap markets mix associate needed in Singapore.
In a land that is right here and in a time that is right now, a technology has arisen so powerful that it can replace basic human document review. Is it time to bow down before our new robot overlords?
First, here’s a little story about me: my life in the legal world began as a paralegal. My first case was a GIANT patent infringement case that was already six years old and had involved as many as five companies, multiple US courts, the ITC and an international standards committee. I knew nothing about any of this.
On my first day, my supervisor (a paralegal with at least eight other cases driving her crazy) sat me down in front of a Concordance database with a 100,000+ patents and patent file histories. “Code these,” she said. I learned that “coding”, for the purposes of this exercise, meant manually typing the inventor’s name, the title of the patent, the assignee, the file date, and other objective data for each document. I worked on that project – and only that project – for at least the first six months of my job. After a week or so, time began to blur.
What I know, in retrospect and with absolutely certainty, is that as time began to blur, so did my judgment. So did my attention to detail. If you could tell me that I did not make at least one mistake a day – one inconsistent spelling, one reversed day and month, one incorrectly spaced title – I frankly would need to see your evidence. I would not believe it. The human mind is trainable but it is not a machine.
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After driving her SUV the wrong way down a freeway, 
