Damn it, you got a summons in the mail. That sucks, dude. You have to go to court. No one wants to go to court. Ugh, that sucks so hard.
You know what? Screw that, you’re not gonna go to court. In fact, you have a much, much better idea. You’re gonna sit home and do what you do best. You’re gonna do the thing that probably got you into this mess in the first place.
The good people at Morrison & Foerster could abbreviate their name to “Morrison” or “Foerster” or even “M&F.” That’s what most Biglaw firms would do. But Morrison & Foerster morphs into “MoFo,” and these MoFo-ers just embrace it. They recruit with it. For a group of lawyers, they’re positively laid-back.
But we didn’t know that they were this laid-back. Tucked away in the otherwise mind-numbingly boring “Financial Services Report: Spring 2014″ are two full paragraphs of weed jokes. Drug talk! In a quarterly report! What the hell is going on with these motherf***ers?
These are just right for Hefner, Guccione & Flynt LLP.
* How high can your heels be for a job interview? [Corporette]
* If you think your client is committing securities fraud, the Supreme Court has good news! Sarbanes-Oxley’s anti-retaliation protection extends to Biglaw associates. [Whistleblower Protection Law Blog]
* Here’s more on today’s Chevron ruling from the perspective of the energy community. [Breaking Energy]
* The California Bar eJournal is running a poll asking the question, “Do you believe that the law school you attended prepared you to practice law?” The results may surprise you! (Shhh! No they won’t.) [Survey Monkey]
* An accused killer asks to withdraw his guilty plea by calmly explaining to the judge that he was high as a kite when he pleaded guilty and that his lawyer was busy boning the prosecutor. He earns an A for effort on that one. [Albany Times-Union]
* Chris Christie’s former campaign manager, Bill Stepien, appears to be the target of a federal investigation. It’s a bad time to be in Christie’s orbit. [Bergen County Record]
* Third time’s the charm! Kevyn Orr, Detroit’s Emergency Manager, is making his third bid to authorize a giveaway to the banks settle a massive derivatives deal that played a big role in Detroit’s financial woes. The judge overseeing the case rejected the prior proposals and may do the same again since the new deal grants UBS and Merrill Lynch a release from liability for the events surrounding a billion dollar deal. [Demos]
* Kerry Kennedy beat her DUI charge in no small part due to the testimony of the toxicology expert. [The Expert Institute]
* Police tried to hide their use of a cell phone tracker from the courts. Apparently the manufacturer asked them to. Oh well, if a corporation wants privacy violations kept quiet, that’s different. [ACLU]
* A follow-up from an oldie but goodie, the judge who changed a baby’s name from “Messiah” to “Martin” based on her personal religious beliefs received a public censure. Perhaps fittingly, the censure was less critical of changing “Messiah” than changing it to “Martin.” I mean, that’s just cruel. [Huffington Post]
I am on record as an optimist when it comes to the internet. The free flow of information on the web, including but not limited to websites like Above the Law, helps people make better decisions about their lives and careers (and also entertains, a value that shouldn’t be ignored).
As this season of Archer reminds us, it’s hard to get started in the drug trade. Which is why it would help a ton if a prospective drug dealer had some sort of experience with the trade. And it would also help if one had a job that could shield them from suspicion.
Like maybe being a lawyer for the police department?
* As if law schools aren’t charging enough, they also absolutely ravage students on casebook prices. It doesn’t have to be this way. [PrawfsBlawg]
* Who’d have thought it would be this hard to define a pig? [Modern Farmer]
* If you aren’t following DLA Piper’s boss Sir Nigel Knowles on Twitter, then… you’re lucky. [Legal Cheek]
* The vice president of the Constitutional Accountability Center weighs in on Judge Wright Allen’s marriage equality decision from the perspective of a gay, married Virginian. [Pilot Online]
* See, it’s not just lawyers who get annoyed when TV doesn’t live up to the realities of the profession. Political communications professionals can get pretty irked by House of Cards. [Ditto Public Affairs]
* A circuit judge just seized control of a lower court’s docket, setting restrictions on a judge’s ability to hear domestic violence cases after finding a repeated pattern of improperly blowing off these matters. It may be the Benchslap-Heard-Round-the-Nation since the slapped jurist is also the president-elect of the American Judges Association. [Detroit Free Press]
* A lawyer who sold 2200 pounds of marijuana can’t practice in Minnesota any more. That’s a metric tonne, by the way. Jeez, now I sound like Thomas Corwin Mendenhall. [Minneapolis Star-Tribune]
* If you can use Craigslist to commit crime, you can use it to solve crime. Awesome. Now, if you can use Craigslist to spark a race to the bottom in legal wages, can you use it to reverse that trend. No. [Legal Juice]
* And if you think it’s tough for young lawyers to find a job here, then was a U.K. firm really asking prospective lawyers to invest money in the firm in exchange for a job? [Legal Cheek]
* McGruff the Crime Dog wanted to take a bite out of crime… with a grenade launcher. [CBS Houston]
* How to keep yourself productive. I’m very intrigued by this browser add-on she mentions… [Corporette]
* This may come as a shock, but Glenn Greenwald is troubled by the Obama administration’s legal justification for killing American citizens overseas via drone. [The Guardian]
* The Careerist’s Vivia Chen interviewed David during LegalTech. You can watch it at this link. [Law Technology News]
* Did you see The Daily Show take on a recent trend in election law? Professor Rick Hasen did. And the video is embedded below… [Election Law Blog]
I didn’t know Phillip Seymour Hoffman, the gifted and apparently bedeviled actor who died of a heroin overdose this week. I have, however, known more than one friend who died from the same drug. They were middle class, suburban guys, honors students, active in their churches and communities. They would now be in their mid- and late-thirties, had they lived. But they didn’t live.
Even as a growing number of states begin the process of piecemeal decriminalization of marijuana, hard drugs like heroin remain another matter. Many people from both sides of the political spectrum agree that our marijuana laws ought to be radically reformed. I’ve written before about the economics of legalization. Civil libertarians, both right- and left-leaning, argue that prohibition offends principles of personal autonomy. Pot, though, is relatively safe — no more dangerous by most metrics than alcohol or tobacco, for however much that means. The fact that, as a general rule, people don’t die from smoking weed makes decriminalization an easier sell for legal reformers.
Heroin, on the other hand? The Drug Enforcement Administration reports that 3,038 people died of heroin overdoses in 2010, the last year for which the DEA has published statistics. A federal survey suggests that 335,000 people used heroin in the U.S. in the past month. (Compare this to an estimated 19.1 million pot users in the same time span, with nary an overdose among them.) Even when an overdose doesn’t kill, the addiction often leaves the user with an abysmal quality of life. Heroin addiction is also a perniciously treatment-resistant dependency. Abstinence rates for recovering opiate addicts are about 10 percent after one year.
Opioid replacement therapies like methadone offer one possible avenue for recovery from heroin addiction, but they are fraught with a lot of their own problems. Under federal law, methadone must be administered primarily at heavily regulated clinics often located in seedy neighborhoods. Also, methadone is a maintenance drug — instead of using heroin daily, an addict uses methadone daily for the long term. Furthermore, methadone carries its own alarming rate of overdose.
Ibogaine, a Schedule I drug in the United States, is available in many other countries, including Canada, South Africa, the Netherlands, Mexico, Norway, and the U.K. among others, where it is used to treat addiction. Unlike methadone, ibogaine is not a maintenance therapy: addicts typically experience relief after one or two doses. Its efficacy rate is reportedly extremely high. So, why isn’t this potentially life-saving anti-addiction drug available in the United States?
Who’s to blame for the legal unavailability of ibogaine?
Is the internet good or evil? Well, neither — the internet, just like the information you find on it, is really what you make of it. Some people use information for good purposes, and some use it for bad.
Here at Above the Law, we tend to see the internet as a force for good. We use our bandwidth on the web to entertain and to educate. Our view is that, in general, more information is good. With more information, people can make better choices about their lives and careers. Should I go to law school? If so, which law school? And what about law firms? Which firms are the best places to work?
But you can use the internet for anything, really. For some folks, to quote the popular song from the musical Avenue Q, The Internet Is For Porn — and so much more, from the shady to the downright illegal….
Ed. note: The Asia Chronicles column is authored by Kinney Recruiting. Kinney has made more placements of U.S. associates, counsels and partners in Asia than any other recruiting firm in each of the past six years. You can reach them by email: [email protected].
Since late last year, things have been booming in Hong Kong / China in cap markets, especially Hong Kong IPOs. M&A deal flow has recently been getting a bit stronger as well. Although one can’t predict such things with any certainty, all signs are pointing to a banner entire 2014 for the top end US corporate and cap markets practices in Hong Kong / China. This is not really new news, as its been the feeling most in the market have had for a few months now and things continue to look good.
The head of our Asia practice, Evan Jowers, has been in Hong Kong for about 10 days a month (with trips every other month to both Shanghai and Bejing) for the past 7 months, and spending most of his time there meeting with senior US hiring partners at just about all the major US and UK firms there, as well as prospective candidates at all associate levels and partner levels, and when in the US, Evan works Asia hours and is regularly on the phone with such persons, as our the other members of our Asia team. Our Yuliya Vinokurova is in Hong Kong every other month and Robert is there about 5 times a year as well. While we have a solid Asia team of recruiters, Evan Jowers will spend at least some time with all of our candidates for Asia position. We have had long standing relationships, and good friendships in some cases, with hiring partners and other senior US partners in Asia for 8 years now.
The evolution of relationships between the genders continues. Currently, in law firms, there is an interesting conundrum; balancing the desire for a gender-blind workplace where “the best lawyer gets the work and advances” and the reality of navigating the complicated maze created by the fact that, in general, men and women do possess differences in their work styles. These variations impact who they work with, how they work, how they build professional connections and how organizations ultimately leverage, reward and recognize the talents of all.
Henry Ford sat on his workbench and sighed. A year earlier, he had personally built 13,000 Model Ts with his own hands. Fashioning lugnuts and tie rods by hand, Ford was loath to ask for help. Sure, there were things about the car that he didn’t quite understand. This explains the lack of reliable navigation systems in the Model T. But Ford persevered because he knew that unless he did everything, he could not reliably call these cars his own.
“Unless my own personal toil is responsible for it, it may as well be called a Hyundai,” Ford remarked at the time.
The preceding may sound unfamiliar because it is categorically untrue. And also monumentally stupid. Henry Ford didn’t build all those cars by hand. He had help and plenty of it. Almost exactly one hundred years ago, Henry Ford opened up the most technologically advanced assembly line the world had ever seen. Built on the premise that work can be chopped up into digestible pieces and completed by many men better than one, the line ushered in an age of unparalleled productivity.
Today, an attorney refers business because he can’t do everything the client asks of him.
There are three reasons why this is way dumber than a made-up Henry Ford story…