DUI / DWI

  • 6th Circuit, DUI / DWI, Gay, Gay Marriage, JPMorgan Chase, Law Schools, Non-Sequiturs, Patents

    Non-Sequiturs: 11.06.14

    * The Sixth Circuit, in an opinion by Judge Jeff Sutton, just upheld four states’ bans on same-sex marriage. Next stop, SCOTUS? [BuzzFeed] * JPMorgan Chase really doesn’t want people to hear this woman’s story. [Rolling Stone] * Dating site busted for sharing users’ STD info. [Slate] * If you’re opting for a life of crime, dream bigger. [Legal Juice] * There’s a patent on filming yoga classes. So class, you’re going to transition from “downward dog” to “shameless patent troll.” [Lowering the Bar] * The continued existence of Thomas Jefferson School of Law has spawned so many good lines. The Times compared the school to Dracula. Now Steven Harper describes it as “throwing furniture into the fireplace to keep the house warm.” [TaxProf Blog]
  • Bar Exams, Barack Obama, Biglaw, Celebrities, Crime, DUI / DWI, Eric Holder, Law Schools, Morning Docket, Sarbanes-Oxley / Sarbox / SOX, SCOTUS, Supreme Court

    Morning Docket: 11.06.14

    * “Perhaps Congress should have called this the Sarbanes-Oxley Grouper Act.” Based on the justices’ reactions during oral argument, it seems like SCOTUS isn’t taking the bait in the Yates case. [WSJ Law Blog]

    * It seems that President Obama still hasn’t made a decision on who he wants to replace Eric Holder as attorney general. Maybe the results of the midterm election made him change his mind. [Legal Times]

    * Jay Z may have 99 problems, but this champagne deal ain’t one because Cooley helped to seal the deal. If Armand de Brignac is good enough for Queen Bey, it’s good enough for this Biglaw firm. [Am Law Daily]

    * Students at the University of South Dakota School of Law are wondering whether they’re receiving a good legal education considering they’re being trained to pass the “easiest [bar] in the nation.” [The Volante]

    * Kenneth Desormes of Connecticut was charged after trying to eat the results of his breathalyzer test. He may be the same Kenneth Desormes who tried to get his law school to admit to fraud. [Hartford Courant]

  • Banking Law, Drinking, DUI / DWI, Events, Football, Jed Rakoff, Law Schools, Non-Sequiturs

    Non-Sequiturs: 11.04.14

    * If you’re a law student in Philadelphia or D.C., come hang out with us this week. RSVP to tomorrow’s Philly event here. [Above the Law] * Or RSVP to Thursday’s D.C. trivia night here. [Above the Law] * Judge Jed Rakoff explains exactly why innocent people plead guilty for all those people who don’t believe it. Well, the people who don’t believe it probably don’t read the New York Review of Books, but maybe John Oliver will have Judge Rakoff on so this can go viral. [The New York Review of Books] * The sex, lies (about polygamy), and videotape article from this morning raises another important issue I’d missed: the heightened stigma faced by women with substance abuse issues. [Law and More] * 10 thoughts on business development. Don’t do what the guy in the last story did. [Medium] * Adjunct law professor threatens to quit. Law school dean surely replies, “You must not know ’bout me.” [Chronicle of Higher Education] * Georgia state legislature has the novel idea to punish the people who exploit student athletes as opposed to only the athletes themselves. Too bad that doesn’t apply to the universities. [The Legal Blitz] * Five years after New York State required banks to negotiate in “good faith” with homeowners facing foreclosure, the Second Department approved a sanction for banks that ignore this obligation. The 2009 law created the “good faith” obligation but contained no remedy for violations. That left trial judges without guidance as to how to proceed when faced with an intransigent bank. [WiseLaw NY]
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  • DUI / DWI, Election Law, Law Schools, Non-Sequiturs, Pornography, Pro Se Litigants, State Judges, Television, Trademarks

    Non-Sequiturs: 10.27.14

    * After being temporarily suspended as part of “Porngate” for trafficking in “highly demeaning portrayals of members of various segments of the population, including women, elderly persons, and uniformed school girls,” Seamus McCaffrey retires from the Pennsylvania Supreme Court. [Philadelphia Daily News] * A group of women lawyers in Miami has called for NBC to cancel Bad Judge because it “depicts a female judge as unethical, lazy, crude, hyper-sexualized, and unfit to hold such an esteemed position of power.” Indeed there’s no place for depicting women judges that way on TV. Especially when Miami is perfectly capable of depicting them that way in real life. [Crushable] * Epic trademark infringement. [Legal Cheek] * Crazy pro se guy slapped down in Canada. [Lowering the Bar] * While almost everyone else is seeing lower applications, USC Law saw a 5 percent bump. [USC Gould School of Law] * Stanford and Dartmouth in hot water over election law charges in Montana. Apparently piercing the imaginary veil of non-partisanship in judicial elections is the problem and not the whole idea of judicial elections in the first place. [Montana Standard]
  • Biglaw, Boutique Law Firms, Celebrities, Drugs, DUI / DWI, Education / Schools, Law Schools, Morning Docket, SCOTUS, Supreme Court

    Morning Docket: 09.30.14

    * “[T]he ‘superstar’ model of Supreme Court advocacy marketing is prevailing”: recent Supreme Court litigation has been dominated by Biglaw and boutiques, and five of them handled about half of last term’s cases. [WSJ Law Blog]

    * It’s not a “done deal” yet, but Albany Law School is in serious talks with the University at Albany to form an affiliation by the end of the year. There’s been no word on whether Albany Law would remain a stand-alone school under the yet-to-be inked arrangement. [Albany Business Review]

    * The dismissal of lawsuits concerning allegedly deceptive employment statistics at several Chicago-area law schools was affirmed by an Illinois appeals court. ::insert sad trombone here:: [National Law Journal]

    * If you’re still thinking about applying to law school for some reason, you might find these tips on what not to write in a personal statement to be useful. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News & World Report]

    * Amanda Bynes, one of our favorite fading starlets who was already on probation, was arrested this weekend on a DUI charge after stopping her car in the middle of an intersection. [Los Angeles Times]

  • Antonin Scalia, Drinking, DUI / DWI, Fashion, Federal Judges, Food, Non-Sequiturs, Sexual Harassment

    Non-Sequiturs: 09.12.14

    * Mexican drug cartels are moving beyond shipping cocaine and are starting to grow the stuff too. As long as they stop hijacking lime shipments and driving up margarita prices. [Vocativ] The prosecutor who admitted Ray Rice into a pre-trial intervention program (and there are pros and cons to that decision) specifically denied the same option to a working single mother of two who didn't realize her out of state gun permit wasn't accepted. She was offered a 3+ year prison deal. Because, you know... prosecutors. [Huffington Post] * If you’re planning on getting arrested in New Orleans — and who isn’t? — don’t get arrested at night. [The Times-Picayune] * A federal judge is accused of sexual misconduct with a clerk. I had to check twice to make sure this wasn’t just a plot point in David’s upcoming book (affiliate link). [Waco Tribune-Herald] * Defense lawyer allegedly drives drunk… to the courthouse. [Indianapolis Star] * The complex legal tapestry of sandwiches. [The Atlantic] * “Mathew Martoma’s Parents Raise Some Good, Less Good Points.” [Dealbreaker] * If you were interested in the mélange of issues surrounding privilege, whistleblowing, and litigation finance, here’s a primer. [LFC360] * Jimmy Kimmel asked some New York Fashion Week attendees about Justice Scalia. Hilarity ensues. Video embedded below… [YouTube]

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  • Basketball, Copyright, Death Penalty, DUI / DWI, Intellectual Property, Non-Sequiturs, Sports

    Non-Sequiturs: 04.30.14

    * Donald Sterling may be banned from the NBA, but the recording that placed him on the outside looking in was captured illegally per California law. [The Legal Blitz] * If the NBA owners agree — as expected — to force Sterling to sell the Clippers, it could cost his heirs over $100 million. Let’s feel sorry that megamillionaires might be slightly less megamillionaires. [Slate] * The inimitable Charles P. Pierce with more on the horrifically botched execution in Oklahoma last night. Overlooked in the horror was the constitutional crisis that preceded it — where the very authority of the state supreme court was called into question. [Esquire] * After getting his client acquitted of molesting a child while drunk, a lawyer managed to get arrested for DWI, hours after the verdict. Amazing. [St. Louis Post-Dispatch] * The conservative argument for copyright reform. Seriously, at this point there’s no political philosophy in favor of lengthy copyright terms, so why can’t we change this? Oh, right. Media companies have tons and tons of money. [R Street] * UVA Law funds the first jobs of a bunch of its grads. David Lat weighs in. [C-Ville] * This story could just as easily be entitled “I’m a young Biglaw associate who lives in Williamsburg.” [McSweeneys]
  • Drinking, DUI / DWI, Fashion, Legal Ethics, Non-Sequiturs, Trademarks

    Non-Sequiturs: 04.25.14

    * Okay, law students! How far would you go for silence in the library? [Legal Cheek] * An attorney was suspended for two years for beating up girlfriend who he began dating while she was still a client. But the real punishment seems to be the extensive text message communications attached to the decision. It’s like a teacher making you read the note you were passing out loud in front of the whole class. Cringeworthy clinginess. [The Oklahoma State Courts Network] * Lawyer’s alleged drunken air rage diverts a trans-Atlantic flight to Dublin. Because if you have a potentially quarrelsome drunk, dropping him off in Ireland is the right answer. [Irish Times] * Aeropostale is suing H&M over the phrase, “Live Love Dream.” Maybe what they save on originality they pass along to the consumer. [Fashionista] * This is how all trials should end. [Condé Nast Collection] * The wrongfully accused — like the people bullied into pleading guilty to crimes they didn’t commit — are given a raw deal in more ways than one. [Policy Mic] * Woman arrested after she called the crime lab posing as a court employee and tried to get her evidence destroyed. Well, it was worth a try. [The Times-Picayune]
  • Biglaw, Celebrities, Drinking, DUI / DWI, Law Schools, Layoffs, Morning Docket, Murder, Prisons, SCOTUS, Sentencing Law, Staff Layoffs, Supreme Court, Tax Law

    Morning Docket: 04.16.14

    * Noah “Kai” Newkirk, the protestor who disrupted Supreme Court arguments in February, was sentenced to time served and barred from the court. Don’t worry, we’ll get you all the SCOTUS clerk news you need, cutie. [Associated Press]

    * “There are still a lot of firms out there hoping the good old days are going to return, and are finally coming to the realization that that isn’t going to happen.” More on Biglaw layoffs. [Am Law Daily]

    * Yet another law school gets its rating downgraded by Moody’s. As a standalone school with “substantial declines in JD enrollment,” Vermont Law’s outlook is now negative. Sad trombone. [Moody’s]

    * Jason Bohn, the heavily indebted law school grad once profiled by the New York Times, was convicted of murdering his girlfriend last month, and now he’s been sentenced to serve life in prison. [New York Post]

    * “Is the Tax Code really 70,000 pages long?” No, not really. We wonder who started the rumor that it was so long, because in reality, it’s only about 2,600 pages long — which is still way, way too long. [Slate]

    * It appears that the apple doesn’t fall too far from the tree with this celebrity family. Lindsay Lohan’s mother, Dina Lohan, pleaded guilty yesterday to drunken driving and speeding charges in New York. [CNN]

  • DUI / DWI, Legal Ethics, Non-Sequiturs, Pornography, Tax Law, Technology

    Non-Sequiturs: 03.10.14

    * Spring break is here for many students, and I know what they’re all thinking: what are the tax implications? [TaxProf Blog] * Man files suit because his adult son is addicted to video games. Well, with games like South Park: Stick of Truth coming out, who can blame him? [IT-Lex] * Former Sandusky attorney under investigation for misappropriation of client funds. At least he’s only alleged to have showered himself with money. [The Patriot-News] * Here’s a lesson in the value of knowing the law: DUI charges against a Chicago judge dismissed. Or maybe it’s more accurate to say, “the value of knowing the law needed to beat the rap after you’ve been arrested for totally forgetting the law.”[Checkpoints] * Business development needs to be everyone’s responsibility in a law firm. Well, at the very least, it needs to be somebody’s responsibility. [The RelSci Web] * Harvard Law professor seeks help writing regulations for the legalization of marijuana in Jamaica. Wait? It’s illegal in Jamaica? [HLS Administrative Updates]
  • Drugs, DUI / DWI, Law Schools, Non-Sequiturs, SCOTUS, Sex, Supreme Court

    Non-Sequiturs: 03.04.14

    * How high can your heels be for a job interview? [Corporette] * If you think your client is committing securities fraud, the Supreme Court has good news! Sarbanes-Oxley’s anti-retaliation protection extends to Biglaw associates. [Whistleblower Protection Law Blog] * Here’s more on today’s Chevron ruling from the perspective of the energy community. [Breaking Energy] * The California Bar eJournal is running a poll asking the question, “Do you believe that the law school you attended prepared you to practice law?” The results may surprise you! (Shhh! No they won’t.) [Survey Monkey] * An accused killer asks to withdraw his guilty plea by calmly explaining to the judge that he was high as a kite when he pleaded guilty and that his lawyer was busy boning the prosecutor. He earns an A for effort on that one. [Albany Times-Union] * Chris Christie’s former campaign manager, Bill Stepien, appears to be the target of a federal investigation. It’s a bad time to be in Christie’s orbit. [Bergen County Record] * Third time’s the charm! Kevyn Orr, Detroit’s Emergency Manager, is making his third bid to authorize a giveaway to the banks settle a massive derivatives deal that played a big role in Detroit’s financial woes. The judge overseeing the case rejected the prior proposals and may do the same again since the new deal grants UBS and Merrill Lynch a release from liability for the events surrounding a billion dollar deal. [Demos] * Kerry Kennedy beat her DUI charge in no small part due to the testimony of the toxicology expert. [The Expert Institute] * Police tried to hide their use of a cell phone tracker from the courts. Apparently the manufacturer asked them to. Oh well, if a corporation wants privacy violations kept quiet, that’s different. [ACLU] * A follow-up from an oldie but goodie, the judge who changed a baby’s name from “Messiah” to “Martin” based on her personal religious beliefs received a public censure. Perhaps fittingly, the censure was less critical of changing “Messiah” than changing it to “Martin.” I mean, that’s just cruel. [Huffington Post] * More on Mayer Brown’s uncomfortable lawsuit against a city for erecting a WWII memorial. [The Careerist]
  • Attorney Misconduct, Biglaw, Celebrities, DUI / DWI, Environment / Environmental Law, Fenwick & West, Law Schools, Legal Ethics, Morning Docket, Real Estate, SCOTUS, Supreme Court

    Morning Docket: 02.25.14

    * SCOTUS seems divided over its greenhouse gas regulation case. Just remember, justices, there’s “no such thing as greenhouse gas,” and if you think there is, you can “go f@ck yourself and die.” [Legal Times]

    * DLA Piper, Fenwick & West, and William Fry are advising on the King.com (aka Candy Crush) IPO. Cool. Know that the public will refuse to invest until those damn chocolate blockers go away. [The Lawyer]

    * “Guys like them are the reason people hate lawyers.” When your lawyers do you this badly, you end up living in one of their homes as part of a settlement. Of course this happened in Florida. [Sun Sentinel]

    * If you’re in the market for an apartment, we hear Brooklyn Law School just sold a bunch of its student housing to a real estate developer. Per the dean, the school is now so small the apartments were unnecessary. Yikes. [Brooklyn Daily Eagle]

    * Amanda Bynes took a plea deal on her DUI charge. She’ll serve three years of probation and pay a fine. Maybe when she’s done, she’ll pull a Lohan and appear naked in a movie. Young men can hope. [CNN]