DUI / DWI

Law License Plates: Defenders Unite

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Our last post on law-related vanity license plates was on Tuesday. We received so many great photos that we couldn’t resist writing another one this week. We are always looking for more, so if you’re a fan of the Law License Plates series, please send in your photos via email (subject line: “Vanity License Plate”).

So, on Tuesday, we wrote about Massholes. Today, we’re writing about a different kind of a-hole: criminal and DUI defense attorneys. These submissions came to us from Texas and Ohio. While these states are far apart, they seem to have one thing in common. Defense attorneys in both states are making straight cash, homey.

After looking at these plates (and the cars they’re attached to), you may want to consider changing your practice group….

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Judges Behaving Badly? A Slew of Lurid Allegations

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Ex-Judge Thompson: not looking well.

Oh goodness. Today is shaping up to be “Misbehaving Judges Day” here at Above the Law.

One judge, new to these pages, is accused of a serious crime: rape. And supposedly there’s a video of the alleged act.

A second judge (or former judge), who should be familiar to many of you — Donald Thompson, aka the “penis pump” judge — has been hit with fresh criminal charges.

Let’s look at the allegations against the two men….

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Biglaw Alternative: Getting Drunks Off

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It’s a dirty job, but someone’s gotta do it. Most lawyers would cringe at the thought of spending their entire careers trying to find loopholes that will release drunk drivers back onto the streets. After all, drunk drivers are one of the few life forms more despised than lawyers.

Southern drunks are in luck, however, because Cerbone DUI Defense are not most lawyers. In fact, the father and son Cerbone team has taken on the job with relish, building an entire DUI defense empire in Savannah, Georgia.

It’s not really surprising that Savannah would need some good DUI lawyers. This is the city that throws the second largest St. Patrick’s Day celebration in the world. I can also confirm from personal experience that it is one of the few remaining places in the country without an open container law. There is really no shortage of alcohol-related fun to be had in Savannah.

Enter the Cerbone team, stage right. They are waiting around day and night, right outside the police station, to take your case when things get out of hand. You’ll be so happy that they get your case thrown out that you won’t even mind when they use your full name and share the details of your drunken escapades to drum up more business…

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Law License Plates: Don’t Drink and Drive (With This License Plate)

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Based on the overwhelming number of submissions we’ve received — please don’t be offended if yours doesn’t make the cut — it seems you’re enjoying our recent series on legally-themed license plates. You can send in your photos via email (subject line: “Vanity License Plate”).

Here’s one license plate we received that’s not explicitly law-related. But the reader who submitted it described it as “a DUI lawyer’s worst nightmare.”

You should not drink and drive — especially if this is your license plate….

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Judge of the Day: Maryland Judge Must Submit to a Breathalyzer Twice a Day, But Still Keeps His Job

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Mmm... lunch.

When I first got this job, I thought that it might be a good idea for me to hook up a Breathalyzer to my laptop to prevent me from posting drunk. Then I realized people enjoy this site more when at least one of us is drunk, and so I sacrifice my liver for you fine readers.

Of course, making internet pronouncements about which law schools should be avoided is one thing; it’s not like I’m sitting on a bench wearing a black robe and banging a gavel. I’m not a judge (or a driver), only my shrink needs to know how many Bloody Marys it takes before I feel like dealing with commenters.

In short, I’m not Judge W. Kennedy Boone III, a Washington County Circuit Court judge in Maryland. In November 2009, Judge Boone got into a car accident where his BAC was .18 — twice the legal limit in the state of Maryland. In March he pleaded guilty to a DUI. And now the Maryland Commission on Judicial Disabilities is making him submit to a Breathalyzer twice a day when he goes to work.

So yeah, Maryland can’t trust the guy to remain sober for an entire work day, but as long as he can prove that he’s sober he is allowed to be a judge, with power over people’s lives…

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Drinking While Riding Your Burro Is Still Legal!

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Legal Blog Watch has a perfect Friday story up on its pages. Two men were arrested for riding animals while drunk. One guy was on a mule, the other was on a horse.

But when they got to the police station, the county attorney determined that the animals did not fall within the definition of “a device in, on or by which a person or property is, or may be, transported or drawn on a highway,” to trigger a DWI arrest. And so the men were released.

OF COURSE this happened in Texas…

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Another Lesson in How Not to Handle a Traffic Stop

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Based on our earlier coverage of traffic stops, here are some dos and don’ts for the next time you get pulled over:

Now that we’ve covered the basics of traffic stops, let’s move on to the advanced course….

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Lawyer of the Day: Anne Bremner – ‘I’m famous… You can’t arrest me.’

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Anne Bremner

A Seattle reader brought a remarkable tale to our attention. He sent along some links about prominent attorney Anne Bremner and her recent brush with the law, along with this commentary:

Anne is a high-profile lawyer — at least here in the Northwest. She is a legal analyst for lots of broadcast media outlets. There is lots of hubris here, so I immediately thought of Above the Law.

Does Anne Bremner view herself as “above the law”? On the night that she was arrested for drunken driving, she allegedly said all sorts of things to various police officers, including but not limited to the following:

  • “I will sue your ass.”
  • “I’m famous. It’ll be bad for you guys.”
  • “You can’t arrest me. I represent Seattle and King County. You are making a mistake.”
  • “I represent you guys. Come on, take me home.”

Sounds like a charming lass, doesn’t she? Let’s get to know her a little better….

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Another Reason You Should Never Blow

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Not that we’re in the business of giving free legal advice, but there are a few things every lawyer should know. Lawyers should know how to handle a traffic stop, for instance. They should know how to handle cops who shout slurs at you from across the street. And of course, lawyers should never snitch.

Some of these lessons come as a shock to laypeople, and even some lawyers who didn’t pay enough attention during Criminal Procedure. But high on the list of things that trained attorneys should never do is submit to a breathalyzer test. You don’t need to be a DUI defense attorney to know that you don’t blow.

The unwritten rule isn’t there to protect drunk drivers (okay, it kind of is there to protect drunks who operate high-speed killing machines); it’s also there to protect innocent people who don’t want to get caught up in the criminal justice system.

An article in today’s Washington Post underscores the point: the breathalyzer simply cannot be trusted, and juries can’t be trusted to know that…

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Northwestern SBA President Now In Trouble With the Real Police (UPDATE: Charge Dismissed)

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CORRECTION AND UPDATE (12/6/2010): We are advised as follows by a knowledgeable source: “There was never a charge of ‘fleeing’ the police or anything of the sort. Todd was, in fact, ‘pulled over’ while parked in the parking lot of his hotel and the only charge against him, driving under the influence, has been dismissed.”

We’ve had quite a bit of fun around these parts with the Northwestern Student Bar Association’s role as PC Police for the entire Northwestern Law community. You’ll remember that the Northwestern SBA admonished students for using “any racial or sexual epithet[s]” around exam time — e.g., “that exam raped me.”

But now tipsters report that outgoing SBA president Todd Belcore is in trouble with duly recognized officers of the law, and it’s got nothing to do with his language:

[O]n a school trip to MS, Todd Belcore was arrested for DUI and fleeing from the police. The people on the trip were warned not to discuss the arrest to avoid the news getting to you guys.

Getting hemmed up on a DUI in Mississippi? That is so gay.

Various Mississippi sheriffs’ departments declined to talk about the incident, but additional sources confirmed the reports….

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Jersey Shore’s Snooki Charged in Connection with Teen’s Death

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Now here’s something from RadarOnline that I think we can believe:

Jersey Shore star Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi was criminally charged for selling booze to minors at a party at her house — a party that ended with the tragic drunk driving death of one of her classmates, RadarOnline.com has uncovered in a blockbuster exclusive. Snooki was one of three people charged in connection with the 2004 death of teenager Michael Truncali, a RadarOnline.com investigation revealed.

Truncali crashed his vehicle and died driving home from a party at Snooki’s house. His BAC was .18 at the time of the accident.

RadarOnline actually talked with Michael Truncali’s parents, who were understandably upset….

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Lawyers of the Day: Worst Scam Ever

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lawyers-gone-bad.jpgA bunch of North Carolina lawyers have been busted for a scam they were running in the Johnston County courts. They “schemed to make drunken driving cases disappear,” reports the News & Observer.
Two lawyers, Chad Lee and Lee Hatch, have lost their law licenses and are heading to prison for four years. Two more, Jack McLamb and Vann Sauls, are on probation for three years. A former prosecutor who allegedly aided in the plot, Cindy Jaeger, still faces charges.
And all five are suffering the embarrassment of running a scam that didn’t seem to really benefit them in any way.

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