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  • Biglaw, Deaths, Dewey & LeBoeuf, Fashion, Fashion Is Fun, Food, John Edwards, Law Schools, Morning Docket, New Jersey, Shoes, Trademarks, Trials

    Morning Docket: 05.01.12

    * Dewey really need to keep coming up with punny headlines about D&L’s painful probe? Pass the lube, ’cause you better believe we dew! Steven Davis, the firm’s former chairman, has hired Barry Bohrer, a white-collar criminal lawyer. [WSJ Law Blog]

    * “Of course all of that money for my baby mama is legal. I… uh… checked with my lawyers. Um, yeah. Just get the money in.” Cheri Young gave some pretty damning testimony yesterday during the John Edwards campaign-finance violations trial. [CNN]

    * As if you didn’t have enough to worry about during finals, Law School Transparency has come out with a new clearinghouse that includes employment outcomes, salaries, and student debt loads. [National Law Journal]

    * “I do not own a color. I own a specific color in a specific place.” Christian Louboutin was seeing red when he responded to interview questions over his trademark infringement suit against Yves Saint Laurent. [Fox News]

    * Remember that Nutella class action suit? Ferrero settled, and you can cash in if you bought their delicious hazelnut crack during the relevant time period. Needless to say, they owe me $20. [American Thinker]

    * Richard Bellman, the lawyer behind New Jersey’s “Mount Laurel doctrine,” RIP. [New York Times]

  • Airplanes / Aviation, Biglaw, Death Penalty, Dewey & LeBoeuf, Drugs, Food, Morning Docket, Nude Dancing, Wal-Mart

    Morning Docket: 04.26.12

    * Dewey need to take a look at the Biglaw industry in general before more firms implode? Hell yes, says an author who’s written on the economics and management of law firms. [DealBook / New York Times]

    * Wal-Mart was served with its first shareholder suit over its alleged bribery scandal, because the only thing on rollback this week is the price of the company’s stock shares. [Reuters]

    * Does diplomatic immunity give you a free pass for getting handsy with the maid? Guess we’ll see next week, when a judge rules on DSK’s motion to dismiss his civil suit. [New York Daily News]

    * As long as you’ve got money, the TSA will totally look the other way if you’ve got suitcases filled with drugs. Vibrators, on the other hand, are simply out of the question. [Bloomberg]

    * As of yesterday, Connecticut became the seventeenth state to kill the death penalty. But not so fast, death row inmates. You still get to die. Isn’t that nice? [CNN]

    * Franchise agreements be damned, because even judges can understand that sometimes, you just need to eat a delicious sandwich while you’re getting a lap dance. [KTVN]

  • Bail, Fashion, Fashion Is Fun, Fast Food, Food, Insider Trading, Intellectual Property, Morning Docket, Pornography, Prostitution, Trademarks

    Morning Docket: 04.20.12

    * George Zimmerman will appear before Judge Kenneth Lester Jr. today to request bail. What kind of evidence will the prosecutor have to present for bond to be denied? [Miami Herald]

    * Should prostitution be legalized? 70% of our readers think it should be (and not just because it’d mean they’d be employed nine months after graduation). But let’s get some more input from others on this topic. [Room for Debate / New York Times]

    * “Bring me Solo and the Wookiee. They will all suffer for this outrage.” Rajabba the Hut seems to have had a second Goldman Sachs tipper. Say hello to Rajat Gupta, who has pleaded not guilty. [Bloomberg]

    * Counsel in the Gucci v. Guess trademark case wrapped up their closing arguments in court yesterday. It’s generally not a good thing when the judge interrupts you to question your late filing. [Businessweek]

    * Uh, apparently there’s a legal battle concerning intellectual property having to do with a Three Stooges porn parody. I personally shudder to think of how Curly is portrayed. [Hollywood, Esq. / Hollywood Reporter]

    * After taking a blow from that fake beef lawsuit, Taco Bell’s sales are up thanks to its Doritos taco. Because getting your fingers covered in orange crap totally makes up for the “taco meat filling.” [Washington Post]

  • Attorney Misconduct, Baseball, Fast Food, Food, Legal Ethics, LSAT, Money, Morning Docket, New Orleans, Sex, Television, Trials

    Morning Docket: 04.19.12

    * Judge Jessica Recksiedler has disqualified herself from overseeing George Zimmerman’s murder trial. Stepping up to fill in as ringmaster for this media circus is Judge Kenneth R. Lester Jr. [Washington Post]

    * Oh joy, new fee hikes associated with law school! Administrations of the LSAT are going down, down, down, so of course the price to take the test no one wants to take anymore is going up, up, up. [National Law Journal]

    * Trying to win at all costs has its consequences. Just ask the New Orleans prosecutors who are now facing bar complaints for allegedly railroading defendants into harsh convictions. [Slate Magazine]

    * Hopefully this lawsuit’s descriptions of the rotten chicken that was allegedly served to customers are enough to make you never eat at Kentucky Fried Salmonella again. [Huffington Post]

    * “Housekeeping, you want me jerk you off?” Ex-MLB player and housekeeper aficionado Lenny Dykstra was sentenced to 270 days in jail after a conviction for lewd conduct and assault. [Bloomberg]

    * Instead of gold, everything Charlie Sheen touches turns into a lawsuit. The producer for his FX comeback series, “Anger Management,” has been sued by another show producer for $50M. [New York Daily News]

    * G’day, mates! This just in: if you’re on a business trip down under, you’re entitled to workers’ compensation for any sexual injuries that may occur “during the course of employment.” [Daily Telegraph]

  • Animal Law, Food, Non-Sequiturs, SCOTUS, Supreme Court, Technology, Women's Issues

    Non-Sequiturs: 04.18.12

    * I will never feel bad about making a typo ever again. [WSJ Law Blog] * Hey law school students, get your hack on! [Huffington Post] * Ann Romney doesn’t want to hear it, but there is a difference between working and working a paying job. [The Careerist] * Should lawyers try journalism? I mean, sure. The job market in the industry is similarly crummy, and journalists make way less money than everyone except baristas and document reviewers. But it is a fun time, and it seems like most lawyers were journalism majors anyway. Go for it… [ Law and More] * The Romney camp drops a bomb: Obama had a dog as a kid. Oh, wait. I misread that. Obama ate dog as a kid. Clearly, people who didn’t have the moral fortitude at six years old to reject the food their parents gave them are unfit to be president. [New York Post] * Man, the presidential race is just at an apex of intellectualism today. Voters in Iowa just received a fundraising letter from Rick Santorum (who dropped out of the race, in case you just got out of prison), in which he wrote that Mitt Romney “truly frightens” him. Congratulations Rick, now you know how the rest of us felt about you. [ABC News] * If you haven’t reserved your .xxx domain name yet, there is still time. They ain’t cheap, but I’m pretty sure ElieMystal.xxx is still available. Hell, who am I kidding. BikeDudeRomance.xxx probably is too. [Law Technology News]
  • Barack Obama, Biglaw, California, Department of Justice, Dewey & LeBoeuf, Eric Holder, Facebook, Fast Food, Food, Law Schools, Morning Docket, Partner Issues, Texas

    Morning Docket: 04.05.12

    * “I think that you know what the president said … was appropriate.” While the DOJ scrambles to meet Judge Smith’s memo deadline, Attorney General Eric Holder is busy defending Obama’s con law faux pas. [CNN]

    * Six more partners have fled from Dewey & LeBoeuf, bringing the grand total of partner defections to at least 46 since January. Good Lord, somebody needs to get this firm a freakin’ tourniquet. [Wall Street Journal]

    * Facebook filed a motion to dismiss Paul Ceglia’s ownership claims, but he isn’t going anywhere soon. Ceglia’s got two months to submit expert reports as to the authenticity of his fake contract. [Associated Press]

    * Joe Jamail, America’s richest practicing lawyer, donated his $3M law library to TSU’s Thurgood Marshall School of Law. Now students can learn more so they don’t have to sue over being graded on a curve. [Fox]

    * McDonald’s doesn’t have to worry about its G-rated Happy Meal toys in California anymore. It’s that XXX-rated lawsuit over a former employee’s “Filet-O-Fish” that the company’s really got to keep an eye on. [Reuters]