Funny Headlines

In these highly charged political times, you tend to hear the term “nanny state” thrown around quite a bit. Whether it’s the mayor of a major US city lovingly playing psy-ops with citizens on vices like cigarettes and soda, or an otherwise sane nation keeping its citizens safe from the horrors of accurately depicted street view maps, the general impression is that the government in question doesn’t think enough of its own people to allow them to live out their lives as they choose. And, while a simple stroll down the street might cause me to have some sympathy with their premise, most of us tend not to believe that our governments should be in the business of social-engineering our free choices (even though that’s essentially the business they’re in).

But sometimes a nanny state action moves beyond the mildly frustrating and into the realm of the hilarious. Reader btr1701 writes in about one such instance, in which the government of Sweden is engaging in some manner of performance art on the silliness of over-regulation by the government.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Sweden Insists On Fire Alarms On Hotel Made Of Ice”

UPDATE (5 PM): Sigh. According to the Smoking Gun, the “poop tattoo” story — reported by The Sun and picked up by Drudge, among many other outlets — is full of crap. But it was fun while it lasted, no?

Some people love tattoos, other people hate them. I’m one of those “other people.” I have no idea why people would want to turn their bodies into coloring books. But if people want to permanently decorate themselves, then by all means, go right ahead.

Besides, if people weren’t so obsessed with inking their bodies, we wouldn’t have awesome lawsuits like this one to talk about. Here’s some background information before we get into the heart of this case:

Boy, a tattoo artist, meets Girl. Girl is a nerd who has a thing for Narnia. Boy and Girl fall in love. Girl decides that in addition to Narnia, she has a thing for Boy’s best friend. Girl cheats on Boy, thinking Boy is none the wiser. Girl asks Boy for a Narnia tattoo. Boy finds out Girl’s dirty secret, and begins to plot his revenge….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Love Hurts, Especially When Your Boyfriend Gives You a ‘Tatt-poo’”

Does the copy editor of the DuPage Daily Herald, like Professor Jeffrey Rosen, think that Justice Antonin Scalia “is a huge dick”?
If so, it would make sense. Animus towards Justice Scalia might explain this amusingly salacious headline:
Woman Tied to Scalia Headline Above the Law.GIF
This innocent little headline, just seven words long, makes it sound like Justice Scalia has a mistress. Who’s a lush. And a criminal.
It’s an impressive feat, in its own way.
Woman tied to Scalia faces DUI charge [DuPage County Daily Herald]
Earlier: Justice Scalia’s Daughter Joins the Ranks of Paris Hilton, Nicole Richie, and State Court Judges


A nice bit of understatement, from the sober New York Times:
duke accuser contradicts herself.jpg

Does she contradict herself?
Very well then
She contradicts herself
She is large, she contains multitudes.

Of accounts of the alleged rape. Plus, a baby.*
Duke Accuser Contradicts Herself [New York Times]
* We realize that the alleged victim no longer “contains” a baby, since she recently gave birth to a baby girl. We took some liberties with the facts, for the sake of our snarky quip. Call it poetic license.

No really, it does! The National Law Journal tells us so:
National Law Journal Largest Firms Hire Elite Schools.jpg
Now where’s our Drudge siren gif?
Largest law firms hire from elite schools [National Law Journal]