Immigration

Teresa and Joe Giudice

Teresa and Joe Giudice, famous for their roles on the Real Housewives of New Jersey, have entered guilty pleas in their federal bank fraud case.  Media outlets are reporting that Teresa faces 21 to 27 months and Joe is facing 37 to 46 months.

The plea agreement reached is not one with a sentence specified.  In reality, the sentencing range is a suggested sentence under the guidelines; the court is free to sentence them up to the maximum of 50 years. Of course, it is highly unlikely that either Joe or Teresa would be sentenced to 50 years.  My prediction is that Teresa gets probation and Joe gets two to three years.

But Joe has a bigger problem….

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* Dewey know which D&L defendants did the perp walk of shame before their arraignment yesterday? Three of the ex-executives! Even Steve Davis, who quit his job as in-house counsel to Ras al Ghul Khaimah of the UAE last week. [Am Law Daily]

* It’s about half and half when it comes to states that have filed briefs with the Tenth Circuit in support of or against the rulings striking down gay marriage bans in Utah and Oklahoma. Sadly, not everyone can be as fabulous as we’d like. [National Law Journal]

* Abortion clinics are closing their doors in Texas thanks to new legislation, and the total number of clinics in the state come September will be six. Let the Mexican medical tourism commence. [New York Times]

* Illegal immigrants can’t practice law in Florida, says the state’s Supreme Court, but they can in California. Good thing there’s eleventy billion law schools there to accommodate them. [Miami Herald]

* Webster Lucas, the fellow suing McDonald’s over an alleged race-based napkin denial that’s since prevented him from working, has sued fast food joints before. He’s a “vexatious litigant.” [NBC Los Angeles]

The first rule of state court is: you do not talk about state court.

* Foreclosure attorney Bruce Richardson alleges that Hogan Lovells partner David Dunn hit him with a briefcase in front of a court officer. That’s how they roll in state court. (Expect more on this later.) [New York Daily News; New York Post]

* From cop killer to nomination killer: Mumia’s the word that stopped Debo Adegbile’s nomination to lead the Justice Department’s Civil Rights Division. [Washington Post]

* In happier nomination news, congratulations to former Breyer clerk Vince Chhabria, as well as to Beth Freeman and James Donato, on getting confirmed to the federal bench for the Northern District of California. [San Francisco Chronicle]

* It’s been a good week for amicus briefs. Congrats to Professors Adam Pritchard and Todd Henderson for getting the attention — and perhaps the votes — of several SCOTUS justices. [New York Times]

* How a Cornell law student got her father to foot the bill for half of her pricey legal education. [ATL Redline]

* As I predicted, the Ninth Circuit’s ruling in United States v. Maloney didn’t sweep the alleged prosecutorial misconduct under the rug by granting the government motion without comment. [The Atlantic]

* RACEISM™ alert: federal prosecutors allege that deputies to a North Carolina sheriff accused of racial profiling of Latinos shared links to a violent and racist video game. [Raleigh News & Observer]

* Speaking of mistreatment of Latinos, a recent Third Circuit decision spells good news for some immigrant communities. [Allentown Morning Call]

* Sarah Tran, the law professor who taught class from her hospital bed, RIP. [Give Forward]

* Baseball is trying to ban home plate collisions, because why have any aspect of the sport be exciting? Here’s an exercise in statutory interpretation featuring the new rule. [PrawfsBlawg]

* Former judge forced to resign at age 40 under a gathering cloud of sexual harassment allegations now collects $65,000 a year in pension. And it looks like he may be claiming “sex addiction” as a disability. Bravo. [WDSU]

* Should legal writing professors be treated like nurses? [Dorf on Law]

* The world’s top Bitcoin exchange, Mt.Gox, just shut down, and millions of real dollars worth of fake money is missing. I’m excited to see the bevy of Libertarian Bitcoin fanatics who praise the decentralized “new Gold standard” and publicly trash its critics explain this one. [Valleywag]

* Are bar associations moving online? [Law Sites]

* Forget your cell phone, the feds have been spending millions to warrantlessly collect your very breath. [Jalopnik]

* Twitter account posting every frame of Top Gun lands user in the danger zone. [IT-Lex]

* Our own David Lat did some speculating about who the next Supreme Court justice might be. [Ozy]

* That hope that the government would deport Justin Bieber? Here’s why that just isn’t legally going to happen. Video after the jump… [Bloomberg Law]

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It’s time for the State of the Union again, which means it’s time to gather around the TV and thoughtfully discuss the future of the country play a sophomoric game based on the events that we expect to unfold over the course of the evening.

Remember to follow your Above the Law editors covering the speech via Twitter. See @ATLblog@DavidLat@ElieNYC@StaciZaretsky, and @JosephPatrice.

Now, on to the game….

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* Kanye West sent out a cease and desist letter to the makers of Coinye, a Bitcoin alternative with a mocking, parody image of Kanye. This whole Bitcoin thing may be incredibly stupid, but these poor entrepreneurs are going to have to junk all their work just because they shamelessly stole the artist’s image. I guess it’s back to their electronic currency based on a busted-up parody of Kim Kardashian, which they call “Khloe.” [Ars Technica]“>Ars Technica]

* The FBI classified Juggalos as criminals and the Insane Clown Posse has gone ahead and filed a federal suit. And who better for the New York Times to consult about this case than our own Juggalo Law! [New York Times]

* Justice Kagan once again performed her civic duty and showed up for jury duty today. Unfortunately, this report doesn’t explain what book she brought with her to kill time, which is the best part of people-watching at jury duty. [Washington Post]

* For those that think we always focus on the negative, here’s a nice narrative about lawyers who really help people. [XO Jane]

* How do you deal with a blazer that just won’t button? Advice from our occasional contributor. [Corporette]

* A group of Vietnamese fishermen sued a Texas lawyer alleging that he falsely claimed to represent thousands of deckhands to get rich serving on the committee of attorneys representing victims of the BP oil spill. BP’s just happy someone might come out of this looking worse than they do. [Miami Herald]

* Sergio Garcia, the newly-minted California lawyer and not the racist golfer, says he’s looking to a future as the governor of California. [Fox News]

* The judge who sentenced a convicted rapist to a month in jail is retiring. Don’t let the door hit you on the ass on the way out! [USA Today]

* Clients don’t grow on trees. So what are you gonna do about that? Huh? I’m talking to you! [At Counsel Table]

Edward Snowden

* Now that a federal judge has ruled against the NSA’s domestic spying program, maybe government prosecutors will cut Edward Snowden some slack — or maybe haha, yeah right. [WSJ Law Blog]

* On that note, the ACLU is appealing the other federal ruling that says the agency’s activities are constitutional. The NSA will let you know what the Second Circuit’s decision is this spring. [Guardian]

* Alas, Judge Shira Scheindlin knew from the get-go that her stop-and-frisk ruling would be contested, and she even warned the lawyers involved that they ought to consider a jury. [New York Times]

* “How do you say, ‘I’m married, but not really? I’m divorced, but not really?’” Thanks to Utah’s same-sex marriage ruling, unhappy gay couples who married in other states are rejoicing over the fact that they can finally get divorced. [Deseret News]

* Facebook, a social network that constantly changes its privacy settings to make your life less private, is being sued over its alleged interception and sharing of messages with advertisers. Shocking. [Bloomberg]

* It goes without saying that Sergio Garcia is having a happy new year. The California Supreme Court ruled that the undocumented immigrant will be able to legally practice law in the state. ¡Felicitaciones! [CNN]

Can you name this man? He’s Obama’s Kenyan uncle. Who are we kidding, better question: Can you point to Kenya on a map?

* Alabama fan allegedly shot despicable front runners who liked the Tide and the Heat for not being distressed enough after Alabama’s loss. When reached for comment, LeBron tightened his Yankee cap and yelled Roll War Eagle Tide. [USA Today]

* A couple of Illinois lawyers got disbarred for beginning inappropriate sexual relationships. One began an affair with a teen he’d prosecuted. It’s good to see people still look up to Dan Fielding. [Legal Profession Blog]

* Obama’s Kenyan Uncle will not be deported. We need him to stay and do a job no American wants to do.. fix Healthcare.gov. [Associated Press]

* Kaplan has agreed to make a number of changes to increase access for disabled students in a settlement arising from the request of a deaf student to get a sign language interpreter. Now figuring out the bar exam will be… slightly easier. [Daily Business Review]

* White males successfully argue that they shouldn’t even have to listen to a black woman talk about race, even if she’s their professor in “communications.” [Raw Story]

* Munger Tolles brings back the former ambassador to Australia as a partner. “That’s not a cognizable claim. This is a cognizable claim.” [Law 360 (sub. req.)]

* David and Elie appeared on CNBC’s Power Lunch today to talk about bonuses that they’re not getting. Video embedded after the jump…

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* The newest edition of the Supreme Court coloring book is out! Christmas has come early if your kid reads Babar and Curious George with originalist intent as racist, colonialist tracts. [Lowering the Bar]

* The Young Conservatives group at the University of Texas has canceled its intended “Catch an Illegal Immigrant” contest amid a firestorm over discrimination vs. free speech. Now Cartman can go back to class. [NPR]

* The Title IX Network is filing lawsuits against universities that allegedly mishandle sexual assault claims on campus. I mean, if the government isn’t going to do its job, someone has to step in. [Jezebel]

* An individual has no expectation of privacy in an online dating profile. They should also have no expectation of a fulfilling relationship. [IT-Lex]

* What is the duty of a sports franchise to protect spectators from flying hot dogs? Asking for a friend… [The Legal Blitz]

* Real Simple Magazine’s December Book Club nominees are out and the list includes Helen Wan’s The Partner Track (affiliate link). The winner will be determined by online voting and closes Sunday, Nov. 24 at 11:59 PM EST, so please go to this link and vote for The Partner Track! [Real Simple]

* Popehat has a site store now. As of now they don’t sell branded mitres, which seems like a damn shame. [Popehat]

* The Obama administration is supporting a ban on unlocking cellphones while publicly supporting unlocking. First they came for unlocking and I didn’t speak out because I didn’t need to unlock my phone. Then they came for Angry Birds and there was no one left to speak for me. [Slate]

* Dean Frank H. Wu discusses the Jimmy Kimmel controversy. It’s not a funny piece, but neither is Jimmy Kimmel. [Huffington Post]

Chief Judge Alex Kozinski

Conservative and libertarian judges on the Ninth Circuit — yes, they exist — have been showing the East Coast a lot of love lately. Last month, my former boss, Judge Diarmuid O’Scannlain, delivered the Joseph Story Distinguished Lecture at the Heritage Foundation (an excellent speech that you can watch here). Later this week, Judge O’Scannlain and one of his colleagues, Judge Carlos Bea, will make appearances at the Federalist Society’s National Lawyers Convention.

And yesterday, the ringmaster of the Ninth Circuit himself, Chief Judge Alex Kozinski, delivered a talk at Yale Law School entitled “The Immigrant Experience and Judging.” He spoke to a packed house in YLS’s largest classroom.

Here are some highlights from his remarks….

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