Judging from tips we receive and comments we read when we post about affirmative action, it seems that a whole lot of white guys in Biglaw feel disenfranchised by all this "diversity" talk. They complain when law firms have special scholarships for minorities, "diversity networking forums" for various groups, and, worst of all, cocktail parties for the gays.

If you're an angry white male lawyer, and if you work in Chicago, you might want to attend this event:

White Men and Diversity: A Candid Dialogue

Tuesday, May 20, 2008
12:00 - 1:30 p.m.
The Offices of Katten Muchin Rosenman LLP
Chicago, Illinois

The Committee on Racial and Ethnic Diversity, in conjunction with the Chicago Committee on Minorities in Large Law Firms, will host a panel discussion entitled, White Men and Diversity: A Candid Dialogue on Tuesday, May 20 from 12:00 - 1:30 p.m.

This interactive panel discussion featuring William Von Hoene, Jr. (Executive VP, General Counsel, Exelon Corporation), Robert Yates (Editor, Chicago Lawyer) and Lawrence Gray (Partner, Locke Lord Bissell & Liddell) and moderated by Dr. Arin N. Reeves will begin a candid dialogue on white men’s perspectives on diversity efforts, the ways in which they feel included in and excluded by diversity initiatives in the legal profession, and insights on ways in which white men can become and stay engaged in creating a more diverse legal profession.

The emphasis on "candid" dialogue is intriguing. Does Katten expect its white males to show up and spout politically incorrect statements? White Males of Katten: don't take the bait! They're waiting to escort you from the building the moment you question why women and minority lawyers always get staffed on matters for certain clients. (Answer: It's because the clients demand it, which explains pretty much everything in Biglaw.)

In all seriousness, White Males of Katten, we'd counsel against an excess of "candor" at said event. Complaining bitterly about how diversity initiatives are screwing you over won't put you on the fast track to partnership. Just work hard and keep your mouth shut. Or get a sex change AND claim lesbian status (which would double your diversity value, while still allowing you to get with women).

As for the panel's exploration of "ways in which white men can help create a more diverse legal profession," here's one answer: THEY CAN LEAVE.

P.S. We expected this event to be open to the public, since it is up on the web, co-sponsored by the Chicago Committee on Minorities in Large Law Firms, and featuring non-Katten panelists. But we contacted Katten and learned that, sadly, it's not. If you work at another firm, dialogue candidly on your own time.

UPDATE / CORRECTION: As it turns out, this event IS free and open to the public. We received this correction, from a Katten representative:

The White Men & Diversity event about which you inquired is a Chicago Committee on Minorities in Large Law Firms event that is being hosted by Katten. The event is open to the public, and there is no charge for the event. Please let me know if you have further questions about this event. Thank you.

White Men and Diversity: A Candid Dialogue [Katten -- Committee on Racial and Ethnic Diversity]

No wonder the producers of The Bachelor are so eager to have a lawyer as the Bachelor. With their impressive educational pedigrees and generally high incomes -- even non-top-tier law grads earn more than the average American -- lawyers are a desirable demographic. And relying upon the contestants to keep lawyers watching might not be a smart idea, since legal eagles keep getting shot down on the show.

From a tipster (a distinguished law professor, which goes to show that even geniuses enjoy trashy TV shows):

[O]n last night’s season premiere of the Bachelor, both of the law students were sent home in the first cut. The Phoenix Suns dancer stayed.

I only caught the beginning, when they were all being introduced, and I noticed the two law students – couldn’t figure out for sure what schools they were at. I’m guessing this show was taped over the summer, so this may have been their substitute for a summer associateship. In hindsight, a bad decision....

I was on the phone the rest of the time, and only learned later that they were both cut. They were decent-looking, though, so I wonder if it was their winning law school personality that made the difference...

We agree. The eliminated contestants -- Juli, 24, of Chicago, and Natalie, 25, of Duncanville, TX -- are quite comely. We're guessing they go to non-top-tier law schools, which have hotter students.

We don't watch The Bachelor; we prefer to spend our trash TV time on Gossip Girl. But if you saw the season premiere, and paid more attention than our tipster, we welcome your thoughts on why the law students got cut.

Update: From another source:

"Not sure what law school Juli attends (I believe it's Michigan, but I don't have confirmation on that), but I CAN confirm that she was a summer associate at Katten's Chicago office. She left partway through the summer to film the show, and she STILL got an offer. True story."

Hopefully she left Katten early enough to avoid having her ass grabbed.

Season Premiere: Episode Recap [The Bachelor (ABC)]

Earlier: Here's One Way To Escape from Biglaw

Last week we told you about a fellow at Katten Muchin Rosenman in Chicago, who managed to achieve the impossible feat: he got fired from a summer associate gig. This is even more impressive than merely getting "no-offered" at the end of the summer. We wrote:

1. A summer associate in the Chicago office of Katten was fired earlier this month (believed to be the week of July 9, 2007).

2. His employment was terminated because (a) he allegedly engaged in inappropriate sexual conduct with female summer associates, variously described as "repeatedly smack[ing] the asses of female summers" or "playing grab ass with female summers," and (b) he allegedly made racially insensitive jokes, in front of multiple attorneys.

In the wake of this story, a reader sent us this message:

Apparently, the WSJ Law Blog "Rules of Etiquette" for summer associates need minor revision. Here are my suggested changes.

You can check out the new and improved etiquette handbook, after the jump.

Yesterday we wrote about a former summer associate in the Chicago office of Katten Muchin Rosenman. He was fired earlier this month, after he allegedly (1) made racially insensitive remarks and (2) engaged in inappropriate physical contact with female summer associates.

With respect to the first allegation, it's claimed that he first made a racist comment to another summer associate. When she got angry, he supposedly told her he liked "angry black women."

(Hmm... What's he doing for the rest of the summer? We hear that Shanetta Cutlar is hiring.)

With respect to the second allegation, it's claimed that the ex-SA "repeatedly smack[ed] the asses of female summers" or "play[ed] grab ass with female summers." What was he thinking? This is obviously unacceptable.

(Silly summer. Ass-grabbing is for partners!)

Read the rest, after the jump.

Hey kids, guess what? It IS possible to get fired from your cushy summer associate gig!

You need to try hard -- really hard. It's even harder than passing the bar exam.

But it's not impossible. This summer has already claimed at least one victim. Multiple sources advise that a summer associate in the Chicago office of Katten Muchin Rosenman was recently canned.

Read the dirty details, after the jump.