Kids

cockfighting cock fights rooster Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpg* According to a lawsuit filed by fellow blogger David Oscar Markus, you have a First Amendment right to cocks on the internets. [Althouse; Volokh Conspiracy]
* In other odd legal news from Florida, Holland & Knight has discovered a new practice area: “suing Little League back to the Stone Age.” [St. Petersburg Times via Deadspin]
* Still more Florida weirdness. Avoid wearing black in this judge’s courtroom. [Daily Business Review]
* Speaking of fashion, should federal judges be provided with clip-on ties? Sadly, it might mark a style improvement for many. [Underbelly]

baby babies kid kids day care child care Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgWe continue our series of posts about perks/fringe benefits provided by legal employers. In prior posts, we covered technology allowances and gym memberships.
Today we’re all about the children. Let’s talk about… child care benefits!
As reflected on the NALP website, here are some of the options that law firms offer:

1. Child care subsidy

2. On-site day care

3. On-site emergency day care

4. Lactating paralegals to breastfeed your infant

We say: As long as rats aren’t eating your kids, it’s all good.
So, what child care benefits does your employer provide (if any)? Please discuss, in the comments. Thanks.
Earlier: Even Worse Than the Cadwalader Bed Bugs?

Phillip Pilie Phillip R Pilie Philip Pilie Philip R Pilie Phil Pilie Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgMany of you are studying for bar exams at the end of this month. You read ATL while procrastinating — and perhaps you feel guilty about it.
But you shouldn’t. There are far worse ways to procrastinate.
Like using the internet to set up trysts with underage females — who turn out to be undercover detectives. This email was forwarded to us yesterday:

From: [UGA Law grad]
Date: Jul 10, 2007 1:32 PM
Subject: Another great moment for UGA Law!
To: [Various other UGA Law alumni]

Philip Pilie… a graduating 3L this past May. See these links.

More background, from a tipster:

Guy in question was studying for the Louisiana Bar Exam before he got picked up [for computer-aided solicitation for sexual purposes and attempted indecent behavior with a juvenile].

He was a Georgia Law ’07 grad, with a job lined up at Baker Donelson (a big firm for the city) in New Orleans. All of that is obviously not going to happen now.

Kicker is this: If you Google his online handle, it comes up with forum posts for a bunch of fashion sites. In one he gives lengthy fashion advice…

Read more about the Prada Predator, after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “A Bad Way To Procrastinate While Studying for the Bar”

Al Gore III mugshot mug shot marijuana pot Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgIf you’re driving 100 miles per hour, but in a hybrid vehicle, can you still get pulled over? Unfortunately for Al Gore III, yes. From Reuters:

The 24-year-old son of former Vice President Al Gore was arrested for drug possession on Wednesday after he was stopped for speeding in his hybrid Toyota Prius, a sheriff’s official said.

Al Gore III — whose father is a leading advocate of policies to fight global warming — was driving his environmentally friendly car at about 100 miles per hour on a freeway south of Los Angeles when he was pulled over by an Orange County sheriff’s deputy at about 2:15 a.m.

Speed limits suck. Why can’t we institute a system of “speeding offsets,” like the market for carbon offsets? Grandmothers in Boca Raton, who consistently drive 10 miles under the speed limit, could supplement their incomes by selling the right to speed. Who needs Social Security?
After the traffic stop, things only got worse for young Al. From the New York Daily News:

Deputies then searched the car, and Gore faced an inconvenient truth when they allegedly found a small amount of pot and mind-altering pills – Xanax, Valium, Vicodin and Adderall.

“He does not have a prescription for any of those drugs,” [a sheriff's spokesman] said.

Finally, we loved this little detail:

Al the 3rd lives in Los Angeles and works for GOOD magazine, which describes itself as “media for people who give a damn.”

If this arrest is BAD for Al’s career at GOOD, we hear they’re accepting résumés over at High Times.
Al Gore’s son busted for drugs in hybrid car [Reuters]
He’s our li’l eco-maniac! [New York Daily News]
Al Gore’s Son Busted! [TMZ via Jezebel]

Rachel Brand Rachel L Brand Above the Law blog.jpgOkay, working at the U.S. Department of Justice may not be a party these days. But the recently announced, imminent departure of Assistant Attorney General Rachel L. Brand — her last day at the DOJ’s Office of Legal Policy is July 9 — had nothing to do with recent controversies (contrary to some insinuations).
As tout le monde in D.C. legal circles knows, the fabulous Brand — known to some as the Prom Queen — was planning to step down for some time. The reason? She and her husband, Deputy Assistant Attorney General Jonathan Cohn, are expecting a baby boy next month.
The lede of this Reuters report, while technically accurate, is therefore misleading. Thankfully, the Washington Post was more accurate:

[T]he Justice Department announced that Rachel Brand, assistant attorney general for legal policy, is resigning….

Justice officials said she plans to leave July 9 and stay at home with her first child, due this summer.

Brand, who worked on the renewal of the USA Patriot Act last year and the confirmation of two Supreme Court justices in 2005, is not known to have played a direct role in the U.S. attorneys’ removal.

“[N]ot known to have played a direct role” — maybe because she didn’t? If she had, rest assured that Chuck & Friends would have invited her over to Capitol Hill for a televised chat.

[D]epartment officials have said that Gonzales’s former chief of staff, D. Kyle Sampson, asked her whether she might want to replace a Michigan prosecutor who was forced out. Though interested at first, Brand did not apply for the job.

Yes, Brand shrewdly did not throw her hat into that ring. As we previously noted:

In declining to be considered, Rachel Brand showed the excellent judgment that has taken her so far, so fast. Had Rachel Brand replaced Margaret Chiara, she would have been the victim of a mainstream media pile-on. The New York Times editorial board would have derided her as a Bush Administration political hack with no prosecutorial experience (albeit a hack with impeccable academic credentials, including Harvard Law School and a Supreme Court clerkship with Justice Kennedy).

So what’s next for Rachel Brand (in addition to a bouncing baby boy)? She’s rumored to be meeting with various private law firms — and any of them would be lucky to snag this young legal superstar.
Brand has devoted the past six and a half years of her career to government service. She leaves the Bush Administration even more highly esteemed, on both sides of the aisle, than when she came in. This is no small feat, given the controversies that have shaken the DOJ, as well as the highly partisan atmosphere currently prevailing here in Washington.
We congratulate Rachel Brand on her successful leadership of the Office of Legal Policy, and we wish her the best of luck in her future endeavors — including motherhood!
(Disclosure: We’d mention that we are friendly with Rachel Brand, but we know from past experience that many of you don’t like such disclaimers, which come across as shameless name-dropping. So we won’t.)
Correction: An earlier version of this post erroneously identified Jonathan Cohn as Deputy Attorney General, rather than Deputy Assistant Attorney General (his correct title).
Assistant Attorney General Rachel Brand Announces Departure [U.S. Dept. of Justice (press release)]
Bush Is Told to Justify Executive Privilege [Washington Post]
DOJ Loses Brand [The BLT: The Blog of the Legal Times]
Seventh official quits Justice Department [Reuters]
Justice Department Official Resigns [Associated Press]
Earlier: Rachel Brand: The Prom Queen Stays Out of Trouble

kids schoolkids black white schoolchildren Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgFrom the opinion of Chief Justice John “Sordid Business” Roberts:

“The way to stop discrimination on the basis of race is to stop discriminating on the basis of race.”

From Justice John Paul Stevens’s dissent:

“John, John, John, you don’t even — you’re glib. You don’t even know what Brown v. Board of Education is. If you start talking about school integration, you have to evaluate and read the research papers on how schoolchildren are affected by racial segregation. That’s what I’ve done. Then you go and you say that no member of the Court at the time of Brown would have agreed with today’s decision.”

Enough quoting from the opinions. How should we react to this ruling?

1. Let the wailing and gnashing of teeth begin!

2. Brown v. Board has been eviscerated!

3. American schoolchildren will soon be getting after-school milkshakes at lunch counters with Robert Bork!

(Note to diner owners: Keep those floors dry — or at least have a warning sign up while you’re mopping. If Judge Bork slips and falls, he WILL sue your ass.)
Court strikes down school integration plans [SCOTUSblog]
Schools Must Ignore Race in Placing Pupils, Justices Say [Associated Press]

rats rat mouse mice DOJ day care Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgWorking as a lawyer for the U.S. Department of Justice offers many advantages over toiling as a law firm associate. Greater responsibility. Better hours. Nicer bosses (with some exceptions).
But working for the DOJ has disadvantages too. Lower pay. Less support staff. No Aeron chairs working pens.
And maybe rats snacking on your toddler. From a tipster:

Cadwalader may have bed bugs, but the Justice Department’s child care center has rats. The center is… managed by a board of directors, mainly middle aged DOJ lawyers.

Here’s an email making the rounds. My favorite line is “They will stay upstairs for play the rat of the day.”

Check out the email, after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Even Worse Than the Cadwalader Bed Bugs”

* So what’s the solution here? Let another state’s appellate court hear the appeals? [AP via Kane County Chronicle via How Appealing]
* Come on, you can get the man a bond hearing earlier than three weeks from now. They’re killing me with this; let him go, damnit! [Atlanta Journal-Constitution]
* Mississippi sues State Farm for bad faith. [Jurist]
* Texas is uncharacteristically deliberate about executing somebody. [CNN]
* What is it with lawyers and sports tickets? [WSJ Law Blog]

Teacher Sues Kids Over Teddy Bear Movie Above the Law abovethelaw blog.JPG
Teacher sues kids over teddy bear movie [CNN]

Miss Connecticut International Above the Law blog.jpg* It is my calling to keep people’s self-esteem in check when out of wack with reality. And to yet again point out the dangers of using MySpace if you’re over 21 or not a musician. I am also in a pissy mood today. [Gawker]
* The recent approval of a pill that stops menstruation has sparked much non-legal discussion on legal blogs, but I really just wanted to show you these funny stuffed tampons. [Law and Letters]
* Kids do the darndest things! A child-director, a lawsuit — and, of course, Kevin Bacon. [UPI]
* Claims of anorexia are just code for “Damn, she looks good!” and subsequent lawsuits code for “We need some free press” and “Don’t hate me because I’m hot.” But Keira, in life as in Star Wars, you remain the mere handmaiden to the Queen of Naboo. [Yahoo! News]
* If my boss asked me if he had a chance of eatin’ good in my neighborhood, I’d file a complaint as well. Unless he were hot, in which case I’d tell him to wait until after my wax. [Rockford Registrar Star]
* Old mothers, teen mothers, gay mothers… Just keep them out of high schools, please. End of PSA. [New York Times]

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