* If it’s not in the URL, get rid of it. [Law.com]
* Pedophiles are upset to learn that the 12-year-old they’ve been “violating” is actually 29. Another example of how TV and movies featuring twenty-something actors as smooth-faced teenagers warps reality. [AP via MSN]
* …and the con. [La Shawn Barber’s Corner]
* If it’s not in the URL, get rid of it. [Law.com]
- Asians, Blogging, Crime, Dewey Ballantine, Education / Schools, Free Speech, Job Searches, Kids, Non-Sequiturs, Old People, Politics, Racism, Rank Stupidity, Romance and Dating, Sex
* Too soon, Daily Princetonian, too soon. And what’s more, you budding SNL-writers are so completely unfunny that you might consider law school instead. Dewey Ballantine would probably hire you. [IvyGate Blog]
* Retiree sick of junk mail claims that (literal) poo-slinging is constitutionally protected. [AP via Forbes]
* If only Jason were just a tad younger, they’d be just another couple of happy, teenage parents. [Sheboygan Press]
* But we’ll always have YouTube. [ValleyWag]
* Want to do more than just blog? Ernie is looking for a freelance legal researcher. Sounds like a great gig if you like that kind of thing. (I obviously don’t, or I wouldn’t be putting this out for all of you to see.) [Ernie the Attorney]
- Abortion, Crime, Drugs, Education / Schools, Food, Kids, Mergers and Acquisitions, Non-Sequiturs, Sexual Harassment, Television
* Another high-profile discrimination case, but this time in the world of haute cuisine. Daniel Boulud’s defense? He’s an immigrant himself — we bet the whole “Freedom Fries” anti-French sentiment really hurt. [New York Times]
* A gentleman should not be required to excuse himself for European civility. [AP via Lowering the Bar]
* I have never smoked pot. As long as people dating me or coming to my stand-up gigs are high, the banter will undoubtedly seem witty and the jokes uproarious, and I’d rather be lucid enough to savor such fleeting moments. [TalkLeft]
* My mom once gave me cash to use on an SAT-prep course. I secretly used it on a Gucci dress. But I still got into my first choice college
* Families blame MySpace for enabling teenage irrationality, sexual perversion and poor parenting. They long for the days they could just plunk their kids in front of the TV without consequence. [Associated Press]
* So you think MTV doesn’t respect its audience? Well, it has just acquired RateMyProfessors, so I guess it’s assuming someone in that demographic actually cares about school and their future and stuff. [TaxProf Blog]
People celebrated Martin Luther King Jr. Day in different ways. Some attended remembrance services for the slain civil rights leader. Some participated in public service projects.
And some tried to get busy with adolescent girls:
A criminal defense lawyer was arrested after a sheriff’s deputy found him naked with a 14-year-old girl in a courthouse conference room, authorities said Tuesday.
Larry Charles, 49, has been charged with solicitation, attempted statutory sexual assault and related counts, said Lt. Dan Bagnell of the Police Department’s Special Victims Unit.
A sheriff’s deputy making his rounds in the Criminal Justice Center on Monday afternoon looked into a lawyers’ conference room on the third floor and discovered Charles and the girl, Bagnell said.
This reminds us of the story of Kweku Hanson. But at least he had the decency to wait until the girl turned 16.
Attorney Found Naked In Courthouse With 14-Year-Old [NBC10.com (Philadelphia)]
Earlier: What’s a Little Kiddie Porn Between Friends?
- Adoption, Angelina Jolie, Deaths, Federal Judges, Food, Intellectual Property, Job Searches, Kids, Money, Non-Sequiturs, Pets, Supreme Court Clerks, Television, Trademarks, Violence
* It’s that time of the year, when you yet again resolve to no longer be an attorney. You have one more chance to make this same futile resolution when Chinese New Year rolls around. [The Complete Lawyer]
* Any food substance that sustains armies and people still living in Y2K bunkers deserves nothing less than a full-on defense of its rights. You go, Hormel. [Likelihood of Confusion]
* Healthy parenting or affirmative action?
I We wonder if little Shiloh will turn out like that other token biological celebrity offspring, Satchel Ronan Seamus (or just another needy, rich, hot girl, whose mommy never loved her). [Hot Gossip at MSN Entertainment]
* Darwinism resurfaces, and thank God, because I really hate tiny dogs. [St. Petersburg Times]
* Bonus season may be behind us, but we still have money on our minds. [May It Please the Court]
* I am open to all genres of TV shows, as you may know. But this? Almost makes me long for the days of Ally McBeal. [QuizLaw]
Four years ago, the “Gifties” of Beaubien School lost in the principal’s office. Then, this class of gifted eighth-grade students lost in U.S. district court.
Undeterred, Thursday the group went before one of the highest courts of the land, arguing their principal violated First Amendment free speech rights when he punished them for wearing T-shirts with the word “Gifties” on them.
“There’s a certain point when you have to stick up for your rights,” said Michael Brandt, one of 24 gifted students who sued their principal and the Chicago Board of Education. His mother, Irene Dymkar, is representing the students in the class action lawsuit.
At oral argument, Judge Richard Posner sounded unsympathetic to their cause:
“Why do people bring lawsuits for such trivialities?” Judge Richard Posner, a notoriously tough jurist, asked Dymkar during a three-judge hearing of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the 7th Circuit Thursday. “Have they been harmed, these ‘Gifties’?”
“Trivialities”? C’mon, Judge Posner — have a heart! Surely you, a genius among geniuses, should be sensitive to the plight of “gifties.”
Chicago Public Schools lawyers say Kotis was protecting the kids from possible attacks by regular education students. They argue there were tensions between the groups and Kotis had outlawed the word “gifties,” as well as “tards,” used to refer to regular education students….
The gifted students claim there was no safety issue.
We admire the appellants’ chutzpah. It takes guts to label your classmates “tards.”
But we question their assertion that there was no safety issue. They might as well have worn T-shirts reading, “I’m a nerd. Please beat the crap out of me.”
Kids pit principle vs. their principal [Chicago Sun-Times via Overlawyered]
T-shirt battle before Seventh Circuit [Overlawyered]
It would have been a felony.
1. The girl who was criminally charged for peeing on herself was a special education student. What’s the point of being “special ed” if you can’t moisten your panties with impunity?
2. Is this more or less egregious than arresting a 12-year-old girl for eating a French fry in the D.C. Metro?
Pa. girl, 12, charged with disorderly conduct for wetting pants in school [AP via Drudge Report]
Ansche Hedgepeth’s French Fry [Balkinization]
- 5th Circuit, Alice Fisher, Contests, Department of Justice, Enron, Eugene Scalia, Fabulosity, Gregory Coleman, Gregory Garre, Jeffrey Fisher, Kevin Newsom, Kids, Litigators, Neal Katyal, Paul Clement, R. Ted Cruz
We love lists: the Forbes 400, the U.S. News college and law school rankings, or Washingtonian magazine’s list of 40 top lawyers under 40. We love lawyers — which is good, since we spend all day writing about them. And we love fabulous things.
So you can imagine our delight upon seeing this feature from The American Lawyer: The Young Litigators Fab Fifty. It’s a list of 50 top litigators from around the country, all under the age of 45, whom the magazine “expect[s] to see leading the field for years to come.”
You can check out the list here. Regular readers of ATL will recognize many of these youthful luminaries. Here are some highlights:
– Latham & Watkins partner Sean Berkowitz,* the former prosecutor who rose to fame durring the Enron case;
– Paul Clement, the U.S. Solicitor General (who was very nice to us);
– Weil Gotshal partner Gregory Coleman and Texas Solicitor General R. Ted Cruz, two top Texas lawyers (and possible Fifth Circuit nominees);
– Assistant Attorney General Alice Fisher, the delectable DOJ diva;
– Jeffrey Fisher, of Davis Wright & Tremaine, SCOTUS lefty litigator extraordinaire (he’s a Bleeding Reinhardt and former JPS clerk);
– Deputy Solicitor General Gregory Garre, Chief Justice Roberts’s former l’il buddy (from his Hogan & Hartson days);
– Professor Neal Katyal of Georgetown Law, the “Paris Hilton of the Legal Elite”;
– Alabama’s Solicitor General, Kevin Newsom (amusing story about him here); and
– Eugene Scalia, the Gibson Dunn partner and fabled ERISA hottie (and son of Nino).
On the whole, it’s an excellent list. We can think of a few questionable omissions (and a few dubious selections). But with something this subjective, reasonable minds will differ.
Congrats again to the Fab Fifty!
* Does anyone know if Sean Berkowitz and Bethany McLean, the Fortune reporter who covered Enron, are still an item?
The Young Litigators Fab Fifty [American Lawyer]
The five-year-old had a better excuse.
(In all seriousness, we have nothing against solo practitioners. And one could argue that, if anything, Biglaw attorneys are more likely to engage in sexual harassment than solo practitioners.)
School accuses 5-year-old of sex harassment [Herald-Mail]
Attorney Censured for Pinching Secretary [New York Law Journal via ATL]
* I have been remiss in not updating you on the legal woes of the blogger everyone loves to hate. And if you still think
* Professor Volokh expresses his indignation at an entire generation of selfish bastards. Holla. Also cf: this for proof that academics may have too much time on their hands. [Volokh Conspiracy]
* The high school’s zero-tolerance policy for weapons may ironically save this senior (at right) from getting his ass kicked. And keep alive a glimmer of hope that he will not die a virgin. [New York Times]
* I think people who take LSAT prep classes or 1L Boot Camp before law school are lame. So you can guess what I think about law students who buy other students’ outlines, and for that matter, the students who sell their outlines (who might not be so cash-strapped had they not taken the LSAT prep classes or 1L Boot Camp in the first place). [The Conglomerate]
* I think this is funny, and rest assured, the baby is okay. But I still feel like someone is going to be sued, especially if the baby ends up growing a different set of genitals. [AP via Forbes]