Above the Law

Recent Headlines from Above the Law

 

First, some good news: law students are starting to feel like the market has normalized. This year’s law revue submissions contained less of the “Oh Noes, Sweet Jobs Are Gone” parodies that have dominated the contest in previous years. This year was actually full of people whose greatest life tragedies apparently involved getting onto/not getting onto law review. The “new normal” is normal.

The bad news: videos about people getting onto/not getting onto law review are generally boring. Dear lord, every prospective law student and their mothers talk about wanting “practical training” and “clinical experience,” but the minute they get into law school they become obsessed with getting the most impractical résumé builder around. There wasn’t one “client” or clinical experience to be found in this year’s submissions. That should tell you a lot about the difference between what law schools say they’re teaching, versus what they’re actually teaching.

Anyway, we’re doing the worst of the worst at 3:00 p.m. on Good Friday. Joe Patrice says not to worry, we’ll have something better for you in about three days…

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Law Revue Video Contest 2014: Dishonorable Mentions”

‘We’re all going to be Free Speech lawyers for underprivileged!’

* This law school will only accept students who want to be lawyers for the “right” reasons. In other words they’re admitting everyone because literally no admissions essay ever says, “I want to be a lawyer so I can make bank covering up a Ponzi scheme.” [Huffington Post]

* Chelsea Clinton is pregnant. Do you ponder how this will impact Hillary’s 2016 plans? Then you’re stupid or sexist or both. [The Baffler]

* Sexually harassing unpaid interns with the full protection of the law was fun while it lasted in New York. [Slate]

* Mark Herrmann shows you how to write articles that are not only boring but that actually deter anyone from trusting you as a lawyer. [The Young Lawyer / ABA]

* How do you deal with political talk in the office? Booze helps. [Corporette]

* More on the wackadoo pro se legal theory that having fringe on an American flag merits an automatic dismissal. [The Volokh Conspiracy / Washington Post]

* The rent is too damn high! [Lawyers, Guns & Money]

* Remaining calm when your client can’t. [Katz Justice]

* Lawyer makes cookies out of vegetables. It sounds gross to me, but I’m willing to try anything once. [Globe & Mail]

Ed. note: This is the latest installment in a series of posts from the ATL Career Center’s team of expert contributors. Today, Sunny Choi of Ms. JD interviews lawyers who have found their passion by leaving the law.

Fact: The law isn’t for everyone. Fiction: You have to practice law if you’re a law school graduate.

Sometimes, you just have to leave the law completely and follow the road less traveled in order to find your true passion. I’ve interviewed two former attorneys who were brave enough to venture into the unknown and in the process, discover their passions outside of the law.

MEE-JUNG JANG (New York, NY)

1. What is your current occupation or line of work?

I’m the founder/CEO of a tech startup called Voncierge.com.

2. Did you practice any law after graduating, and if so, where and what did you practice?

I practiced corporate and IP law at Cleary Gottlieb in Manhattan for about two years.

3. What made you decide to completely leave the law and pursue a startup?

Continue reading at the ATL Career Center…

I am writing to share some great news about Florida Coastal School of Law’s latest bar passage results released this week. Out of the 11 law schools in the state, Coastal Law’s bar passage rate of 72.9% is ranked in the top 5…

Nicole C. Schumer, the Assistant Director of Admissions at Florida Coastal Law (an ATL March Madness Final Four school), struggling to find the positive.

Finishing 5th out of 11 is a solid “Gentleman’s ‘D’” for the jewel of the Infilaw crown, but Schumer is intent on slathering lipstick all over this pig by hailing it as a “top 5″ achievement. Let’s help her out. Out of 11 Florida law schools, Florida Coastal is Number 1 in graduate underemployment! Number 1!

(Keep reading to see the whole press release.)

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Law School Is Mediocre And Proud”

In this economy, lawyers are being forced to roll up their sleeves and learn new tricks of the trade. Some have even taken up the practice of Door Law — they’ll take any case that walks through the door. Other lawyers have expanded their horizons to offer services that are wholly unrelated to the law. Desperate times call for truly desperate measures.

Check out this advertisement — if you can even call it that — for a lawyer who really seems willing to do just about anything for a buck…

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Caption Contest: The State Of The Legal Profession In One Sad Graphic”

Keith Lee

Email sucks.

Actually, let me clarify that. Email is a fast, open platform that has universal adoption and has changed the world. It’s convenient and probably how 99% of the people reading this conduct their client communications. But email client programs suck. Most of them are horribly designed and have morphed into unwieldy, user-interface nightmares, mostly due to the broken way most people use them.

If you’re like the vast majority of people, your inbox is a source of work. It’s also highly likely that you also treat it as a storage/repository of work. You begin to attempt to organize it. You start flagging things, creating folders, and soon you’re using your inbox as a task management system. Which is horribly inefficient, and not at all what your inbox is designed for. Furthermore, you’ve likely got your email client set to fetch and notify you on some ridiculous schedule, like every five minutes. Meaning that it’s quite possible that you never get more than five minutes into a task before being interrupted!

Stop. Just stop it….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Your Inbox Is Out Of Control; Time To Take It Back!”

Judges can be really picky about courtroom attire. Some think women dress like ignorant sluts (they were probably showing elbows). Others hate ascots and comfortable shoes. On the other hand, apparently some let lawyers wear rented costumes. Judges are gods and goddesses of their domain and lawyers have to be ready to adhere to the whims of the bench.

Even if the judge’s whims are ridiculous.

Like this judge who got bent out of shape just because a male lawyer was having a pants off dance off in her courtroom….

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “This Lawyer Tossed From Court Just Because He Didn’t Wear Pants”

A few states are still wrapped up in the “knockout game” panic, despite there being very little evidence that it’s even a thing, much less something that can’t be handled by existing assault laws. But since no panic can be allowed to escape unlegislated, sweaty-browed legislators are pushing bad, broadly-written bills in order to put an end to this scourge, one that lies somewhere between “vodka tampon” and “jenkem” on the scale of believability.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Lawmakers Push ‘Knockout Game’ Bill, Citing Various ‘Feelings’ As Evidence Something Must Be Done”

We among the chattering classes give short shrift to the effects of those opinions we espouse. Take, for instance, gay marriage. This website was one of many that advocated fairly passionately in support of legal gay marriage. In a vaccum, of course, this was a sound position to take on the matter. In a vacuum, everything just sounds like “VVVRRRRRRGGGRRRRRRRR-WWWWWWWOBBLEOBBLEVVVVRRRRR!!!!”

But we do not live in vacuums, do we kids? No. Our floors are filthy. And so it is that gay marriage is now legal and heterosexuals are forced to break big rocks all day, waiting for the day that their homo overlords stop with the disco dancing and the fornicating. This is the bed we’ve made.

I suppose I should get to the sporting point of this discursion before I lose the 3 or 4 people who read these posts. Of late, the internet and even this small cyber space have beaten up on the NCAA something fierce. The organization — full of sports and money, signifying nothing — is a convenient target for scorn. And the recent drive to unionize the Northwestern football team, covered on this site and others, has galvanized into a sort of fait accompli about the end of amateurism, that traveshamockery of Orwellian gobbledygook. But if the Northwestern football players were successful in their legal fight, what would that really mean? What would the world of college sports look like if the jocks finally avenged their tragic defeat depicted in the non-fiction film Revenge of the Nerds?

Let’s talk powerful athletes…

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “NCAA Stupidity Not Limited To Bureaucrats”

Something like this is a no-no in several states.

* Leonard M. Rosen, one of the name partners of Wachtell Lipton Rosen & Katz, died earlier this week. Our very own Managing Editor David Lat once sat three doors down from this respected restructuring maven. Rest in peace. [Bloomberg]

* A judicial ethics board has recommended that this judge be removed from the bench because she once “sold out her clients, her co-counsel, and ultimately herself.” Oh Flori-duh, you give us so many reasons to <3 you. [Sun Sentinel]

* Gov. Christie named Dean Patrick Hobbs of Seton Hall Law as ombudsman for New Jersey’s executive branch. Congrats, but looks like Seton Hall may need a new dean. [New Jersey Law Journal]

* A woman working in retail was put on four months of forced maternity leave when she was four months pregnant. She’s due after her forced maternity period is up. Of course she’s suing. [Los Angeles Times]

* ICYMI, here’s a list of all of the fine states in America where blowjobs are illegal, but necrophilia is a-okay — or “anti-blowjobs, corpse-sex-friendly states,” as Adam Weinstein ever so eloquently puts it. [Gawker]

  • Fall 2013 OCI Schedule

    from the firm

    8/5: University of California, Berkeley
    8/14: Washington University
    8/16: Harvard Law School
    8/16: University of Michigan
    8/19: John Marshall
    8/20: University of Colorado, Boulder
    8/22: Northwestern University
    8/23: Loyola University
    8/29: University of Chicago
    9/3: University of Denver, Sturm College of Law
    9/3: IIT Chicago-Kent
    9/10: University of Illinois at Urbana Champaign

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