Law Schools

A roundup of funny legal stuff from around the Internet to help you burn away the last few hours of Friday.

Actual tuition reduction at a major law school!

What makes a good teacher?

* As a public service, here’s a very good guide about what criminal activities should NOT be talked about on Facebook. [Slate] * It’s getting to that time of year when law students’ minds turn from finals preparation and towards the violent overthrow of the government. [McSweeney's] * Finally, the full story on how reporter T.J. Quinn eavesdropped on Barry Bonds’s grand jury testimony without violating any laws. Go New York Daily News lawyers. [Deadspin] * There allegedly was a female soldier prostitution ring at Fort Hood, lead by the unit’s sexual assault prevention officer. Now watch as somebody uses this to argue that women shouldn’t be in the military. [Gawker] * Winners from Detroit’s bankruptcy filing include lawyers, don’t really include Detroit. [Am Law Daily] * Here we go — proof that the internet is racist is coming. [Forbes] * Rutgers-Camden Law has been fined and censured for allowing applicants to use something other than the LSAT without asking the ABA nicely if it could do so first. This is what the ABA cares about. Those are the questions they had for Rutgers. What was left off the list of ABA inquiries: Rutgers-Camden’s favorite color? [ABA Journal]

Is the Michigan bar exam too hard, or are students in Michigan too dumb?

Ed. note: We’ll return to our normal publication schedule on Monday, December 2. We hope to see you at our holiday happy hour on Thursday, December 5 — for details and to RSVP (to this free event with an open bar), click here.

* Even in a post-nuclear world, Republicans can still block certain judicial nominees. [New York Times]

* A prominent Toronto lawyer has gone missing — and so, allegedly, has $3 million in client trust funds. [Toronto Star]

* Dewey see legal fees in the future for Stephen DiCarmine and Joel Sanders? Well, a $37 million lawsuit won’t dismiss itself. [Law360 (sub. req.)]

* Congratulations to Matthew Layton, the new managing partner of Clifford Chance. [The Lawyer]

* And congratulations to Ralph Pellecchio and Jim Wernz, who were married by none other than Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg — who even helped them write their vows. [Talking Points Memo]

* Sure, let’s have the whole “is now a good time to go to law school?” debate again. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Especially if you’re a minority, since white people are losing interest in law school. [Am Law Daily]

* Congress can’t even get its act together about real guns, so perhaps it’s no surprise that limits on fake guns are set to expire soon. [New York Times]

* Harry Potter was convicted of obstruction of justice. Just because you’re a wizard doesn’t mean you’re above the law. [Daily Utah Chronicle]

Ed. note: Happy Thanksgiving! We will resume our normal publication schedule on Monday, December 2. We hope you have a wonderful holiday, and we thank you for your readership. * O.J. Simpson is going to be staying in prison longer. The search for the real killers suffers another setback. [Fox News] * Sriracha-gate continues. A federal judge has ordered a partial shutdown of the plant. [Slate] * Lawyers are destroying American society. Because the Romans also had a glut of law school grads when the Republic fell. Or something. [Bloomberg BusinessWeek] * A federal government lawyer who mastered the stock market and lived a frugal life has given some $56 million to the University of Washington School of Law. Go ahead and hold your breath for that Washington tuition decrease. [Seattle Times] * UNC professors are questioning the motives of a public records request targeting the new director of the law school poverty center. Which isn’t naked intimidation at all. [Chronicle of Higher Education] * A couple weeks ago Professors Alan Dershowitz and Sanford Levinson debated Professor Eugene Volokh and David Kopel. The former argued that the Second Amendment has outlived its usefulness. Based on minds changed, they won. The debate video is embedded past the jump… [Intelligence2 Debates]

This law school sale isn't a bad thing, but it shouldn't be confused with real reform.

* Oh baby (or the lack thereof): the Supreme Court has decided to take on two of the cases asserting religious challenges to the Affordable Care Act’s contraception coverage mandate. [Blog of Legal Times]

* “[H]e has a Rolodex like a Ferris wheel.” Delaware’s Supreme Court Chief Justice is retiring from the bench to join Potter Anderson & Corroon, where that Rolodex will come in handy. [Wall Street Journal]

* Italian prosecutors think Amanda Knox should be convicted of murder (again) and given a 30-year sentence in a retrial she’s not even there for. This kind of sounds like it’d be a double-secret conviction. [CNN]

* With fall finals right around the corner, law students can take comfort in the fact that next week they’ll be soothed by therapy dogs — ones that’ll need therapy after dealing with law students. [WSJ Law Blog]

* If you’re considering applying to law school against all odds, you should determine when the right time to apply would be. Don’t listen to your parents, listen to your gut. [Law Admissions Lowdown / U.S. News]

* If you haven’t heard, the Beastie Boys are having a copyright fight with toymaker GoldieBlox over a parody of the song “Girls” that’s been used in a commercial. Fair use? Decide after the jump. [NBC News]

* Santa Claus arrested for sexually harassing an 18-year-old elfette. She started getting suspicious when he kept looking at her and proclaiming “Here Cums Santa Claus.” [The Smoking Gun] * Atlanta jury questionnaire lists “slave” as an occupational option. There’s a lot of outrage, but they were just covering their bases — a potential could have just moved there from Mississippi. [11 Alive] * Speaking of juries, a long-time prosecutor ends up on a jury and sums up the 10 things he learned from his jury experience. [Texas Evidence] * The Second Circuit’s decision to remove Judge Scheindlin from the stop-and-frisk case was bad enough — especially since it was an unprecedented overreach for a circuit panel when no one requested her removal — but its true cost is in chilling justice down the road, when judges start to look over their shoulders for fear that an activist appellate panel is out to get them. [WiseLawNY] * Interesting question: what do you wear under a 3/4-sleeved blazer? I’d wear a T-shirt that says, “I give 3/4 of a damn today,” but most lawyers would disagree. [Corporette] * Apple hired CPA Julie Davis as a damages expert in its case against Samsung. Whatever she was paid, it wasn’t enough — the jury singled out Davis as the reason they awarded Apple $290 million. [The Expert Institute] * Remember when we talked about how much the government profits off your law school debt? Well, the totals are in, and the government pulled down $41.3 billion off you this year. [USA Today] * In the spirit of funny flowcharts, here’s a decision tree to help make that decision about going to law school. Image after the jump… This came to us courtesy of a 2L at a T14 law school who asked to remain anonymous (click for a larger version of the image):

* You’d think that when discussing major reforms to the patent system, the director of the USPTO would be there, but you’d be wrong. You’d also be wrong if you thought we had a director right now. [National Law Journal]

* Welcome to the future of Biglaw: Allen & Overy has realized that it’s a waste of money to keep hiring in a weak market, so the firm is recruiting its alumni to serve as contract attorneys in times of higher legal demand. [Legal Week]

* Dean Gregory Maggs, the interim leader of George Washington University Law, is being lauded for increasing first-year enrollment by 22 percent in a time of crisis. Excellent work, sir. You flood that job market. [GW Hatchet]

* Just because you have a law degree doesn’t mean you’re “entitled to rise up and become partner.” Getting a job in the new normal involves having a good attitude and social graces. [WSJ Law Blog]

* Ladies, if you get pregnant after a fling with an Olympic medalist and move out of state, please know your “appropriation of the child while in utero [will be deemed] irresponsible, reprehensible.” [New York Times]

* GTL stands for “Gym, Tan, Laundry,” but the owner of these Jersey Shore nightclubs thinks it stands for “Gym, Tan, Lawsuit” — thanks to losses uncovered by its insurer in the wake of Hurricane Sandy. [Newark Star-Ledger]

A law school grad explains why he's been so stupid with money.

The fight of an expert report turns ugly when the defense charges that a prestigious law professor lifted large sections off Wikipedia.

The school-by-school breakdown of the New York bar exam results is out. Let's take a look!

* In November, Supreme Court justices engaged in the “totally unnecessary” practice of releasing 41 pages of nondecision opinions. In all fairness, we can’t really blame them for enjoying hearing themselves speak. [National Law Journal]

* These D.C. Circuit judges of differing political viewpoints “disagreed less than 3 percent of the time” over the course of two decades. Please, keep arguing about the court’s “ideological balance.” You’re accomplishing lots. [New York Times]

* With more tie-ups than ever before and another record broken, 2013 is officially the year of full-blown law firm merger mania. Query how many more we’ll be able to add to the already huge list of 78 by the end of December. [Am Law Daily]

* Speaking of which, Baker Hostetler is merging with Woodcock Washburn, an intellectual property firm with a name that sounds like the aftercare instructions for a painful sex toy injury. [Philadelphia Inquirer]

* Of course a fired ADA’s scandalous emails landed on BuzzFeed. This is one more embarrassing chapter in the Brooklyn District Attorney’s Office’s terrible, horrible, no good, very bad year. [New York Times]

* It’s amazing how things can change in a year. In 2012, New York bar pass rates for in-state schools fell. In 2013, they’re up — except for one school, which is way down. Which one? [New York Law Journal]

The ATL editors record their real-time reactions to the Team Sander story.

* Paramount is flexing its legal muscles to stop producers from making a sequel to It’s a Wonderful Life. Wait, Hollywood is trying to stop a mindless and unnecessary sequel? Where was this Paramount when they greenlit Kingdom of the Crystal Skull? [Indiewire] * Are you a “young, outgoing lawyer[] and recent law school grad[]” looking for your big break? Because it looks like a TV show may want to talk to you. [Get Entry Level Attorney Jobs] * Remember the woman who accused the Duke Lacrosse team of rape? She was convicted of second degree murder today. Yikes. [The Expert Institute] * This is an awesome program: a number of lawyers are helping first responders prepare wills for free. [KEZI] * Overzealous IT guy who tried to keep everyone at work locked out of the system because “he was the only person capable of running the network” is going to jail. If you’ve ever dealt with some form of this guy, this story is like a dream come true. [IT-Lex] * A majority of students say that a two-year law school program would make them more likely to go to law school. This is the best argument against a two-year program ever. [Valley News Live] * Full-time jobs will exceed the number of law school grads by 2016. Except this assumes the number of legal jobs holds steady, which is a hell of an assumption when demand for legal services is still in decline. [Tax Prof Blog] * A company’s lawyer had secret communications with a judge and ultimately secured a multimillion dollar verdict. The Mississippi Supreme Court frowned on that behavior. [Cleveland Plain-Dealer] * For the 50th anniversary of the assassination of JFK by Fidel Castro the Mafia LBJ ALF Lee Harvey Oswald, here’s a look at just how difficult it is to kill chief executives these days. [Vocativ]

If you had a career services budget, hopefully you'd spend it better than these folks.

Is ignorance an excuse for racism?

Congratulations to this Georgetown 2L on her game show success!