Yesterday, as part of our series on clever — or, at least, interesting — business cards, we shared with you the card for Adam Reposa, Texas “lawyer/winner.”
Reposa’s card included his stats in terms of cases won. As one commenter pointed out:
Must be a pain to update your business cards every time you win a case. Lucky for him the victories seem few and far between.
It turns out Reposa has a second, evergreen card:
He offers advice to prospective clients on the card’s flip side…
Texas attorney Adam Reposa is not shy about singing his own praises. The man registered with the State Bar as “Bulletproof,” after all. He’s not jailproof, though. He was slapped with contempt of court charges for making the “jerk-off gesture” within sight of the judge, and sentenced to 90 days in prison.
After we posted our call for lawyerly business cards, someone sent Reposa’s along:
I’ve attached a copy of Texas attorney Adam Reposa’s business card — a friend of mine got it at a bar last year. I’m not sure if it’s clever — it probably violates 4 or 5 Texas Rules of Professional Conduct — but it is hilarious.
Check out the flip side of the card, which is just as egregious….
Many job seekers would love to work as lawyers for the federal government but haven’t had luck landing a position. Openings for attorneys on USAJOBS attract hundreds of applicants. In light of massive law-firm layoffs and the relative stability of government employment, high demand for federal jobs is unsurprising. You have to be a positively brilliant lawyer to land a government gig these days.
Or not. If you’ve applied to the U.S. Department of Justice without success, ask yourself: Do I have a normal or above-normal IQ?
If you do, you might be… overqualified. From a Justice Department job posting (emphasis added):
The Civil Rights Division encourages qualified applicants with targeted disabilities to apply. Targeted disabilities are deafness, blindness, missing extremities, partial or complete paralysis, convulsive disorder, mental retardation, mental illness, severe distortion of limbs and/or spine.
Quips former DOJ lawyer Ty Clevenger: “Having worked there, I think CRD has plenty of mentally retarded lawyers already. Mostly in supervisory positions.”
Says another tipster who brought this to our attention: “I understand how you can have a few missing limbs or be partially paralyzed and still be a trial lawyer, but someone with an IQ less than 70?!?!!?”
Recruiting mentally retarded lawyers to litigate civil rights cases for the DOJ may take the expression “good enough for government work” too far. But, in fairness, there is a caveat to all of this….
When we reviewed Morrison & Foerster’s new website yesterday, a commenter advised us to check out the firm’s career page for those who think they might have “that MoFo mojo” (in the words of the firm).
The commenter was amused by MoFo’s comparing new lawyers to pigeons, and its advice on how to avoid being “@$%#@! Pigeonholed.” We were amused, though, by its assessment of “what makes a whole lawyer” and how to be successful as a new associate at MoFo.
If you’ve ever felt like Biglaw just saw you as a beast of burden, MoFo confirms it, using a cow to illustrate the various cuts of a good lawyer:
Intellectual curiosity is important and is, sensibly, the flavor found in the cow’s head. What does MooFo ascribe to the rump?
Morrison & Foerster has fully embraced the moniker MoFo. And now the firm appears to be embracing a WTF theme for its website.
MoFo rolled out the new website recently. Tipsters say the new site took years and many dollars to create. The design budget is rumored to be $1 million. (We’ve asked the firm to comment on the cost, but it has not responded.)
The site, however, doesn’t look like a million bucks. Multiple readers have checked it out and sent us emails like this one:
It looks like someone hacked their site, or that they delegated web design (and authorship) to a 13-year-old kid learning HTML. Truly dreadful.
Most Biglaw websites are pretty staid. MoFo is seriously rocking the Biglaw boat with this redesign. There are mind games, sound effects, and optical illusions. We give you a tour after the jump.
Longtime Above the Law readers will be familiar with Peter “P’Ta Mon” John, aka “The Thugs’ Lawyer.” We named him a Lawyer of the Day back in 2007, for his aggressive advertising campaign touting himself as “The Thug’s Lawyer” (along with the catchy slogan, “No Evidence — No Conviction!”). We mentioned him again in 2008, when he started offering a $500 “Expungement Special” (which perhaps the good Professor Jones availed himself of).
Well, Peter John is back in the news again — and not for positive reasons this time. From the Baton Rouge Advocate:
Peter Q. “P’Ta Mon” John, who advertises himself as “The Thugs Lawyer,” was indicted Thursday on charges that he conspired to have attempted murder charges against two local rap music executives dropped….
An East Baton Rouge Parish grand jury Thursday accused John, 39, 11110 Boardwalk Drive, of conspiring with Moore, Demond Eames and Carter to commit perjury in the civil cases and obstruct justice in the criminal case.
In an interview with ATL, Peter John explained his “thugs’ lawyer” ad by saying, “Look, I am close to the streets.” Did he perhaps get too close to the streets?
Right before the holidays, we wrote a heartwarming story about child porn and stumbled across the website of Lindeman, Alvarado & Frye, a Texas criminal defense firm with a variety of sexual crimes practice groups.
We wrote an Adventures in Law Firm Advertising post about the firm because of its disturbing taste in stock photos. For example, we thought this image for a kiddie porn defense practice group was highly questionable:
Apparently, the photos did not stay up long after our post. The Texas Lawyer wrote on Friday about the firm’s learning a lesson from ATL:
Above the Law noted that a photo of a pigtailed girl accompanying Lindeman, Alvarado’s description of its Child Sexual Assault & Internet Solicitation of a Minor Defense Practice was a “little off.” The blog also pointed out a photo of a troubled-looking woman wrapped in a robe illustrating the firm’s Rape and Sexual Assault Defense Practice; one of a hand over the mouth of a young girl to illustrate the firm’s Family Violence Defense Practice; and a photo of a suitcase filled with white packages illustrating the firm’s Interstate and International Drug Charges Defense Practice.
The stock photos in question were added to the firm’s Web site in April by FindLaw, which Lindeman, Alvarado had hired to revamp and expand the firm’s site, Lindeman says. Lindeman, Alvarado partner Charles B. “Brad” Frye says the project cost the firm about $30,000.
We think Lindeman may be entitled to a refund. An ATL reader sent the firm a link to our post, and the firm e-mailed Findlaw to get the photos taken down. Since it was the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, they didn’t remove them from the site until Monday, Nov. 30.
Not that it matters. We still have the screen shots. Plus, we discovered one more photo — thanks, Google cache! — that may be the worst of them all….
Adventures in Lawyer Advertising is a recurring feature here at Above The Law, where we highlight, um, noteworthy advertising by lawyers and law firms.
Last week, we brought you questionable imagery from a Texas criminal defense firm. (They’ve since removed those photos — thank goodness for screen shots.) The newest addition to this series is an injury and accident firm in Missouri: Brown & Crouppen.
In a series of YouTube videos, the “three high powered lawyers” act out their conversations before heading to trial. A memorable line: “I love the smell of insurance company sweat in the morning.”
Our favorite of the three videos after the jump.
When Chintan Panchal decided to leave a global BigLaw partnership to start his own firm, he could only hope that he would face the high-quality problem of firm building that many had cautioned him about. Focused on the uncertainty surrounding of a new firm launch, he decided to tackle staffing needs, IT challenges, and financial planning requirements after he had built up his legal practice.
Panchal Associates LLP–a corporate/finance and outside general counsel boutique–was quickly off to a great start. Clients and matters were flying in the door, and Chintan soon had a team of lawyers and staff with a variety of operational needs. To continue building an excellent team and provide them with a competitive benefits package, to expand his physical presence to include a European practice and additional partners, and to scale his operations and IT capabilities to support this growing enterprise brought with it demands of time, money, and expertise. Chintan knew he needed help.
“With the assistance of NexFirm, we have upgraded the capabilities of our firm to meet, and in some cases exceed, the standards we were used to at our former BigLaw firms. Operationally, we can now attract and service clients we didn’t have the bandwidth to support in the past, and continue to build our team with the best and brightest legal talent in the industry,” said Chintan Panchal, adding “It has worked out quite well in our case; NexFirm is an essential partner for us.”
The holiday season is upon us, and yet again, you have no idea what to get for the fickle lawyer in your life. We’re here to help. Even if your bonus check hasn’t arrived yet, any one of the gifts we’ve highlighted here could be a worthy substitute until your employer decides to make it rain.
We’ve got an eclectic selection for you to choose from, so settle in by that stack of documents yet to be reviewed and dig in…
Ed. note: The Asia Chronicles column is authored by Kinney Recruiting. Kinney has made more placements of U.S. associates, counsels and partners in Asia than any other recruiting firm in each of the past six years. You can reach them by email: firstname.lastname@example.org.
We currently have a very exciting and rare type of in-house opening in China at one of the world’s leading internet and social media companies. Our client is looking for an IP Transactional / TMT / Licensing attorney with 2 to 6 years experience. The new hire will be based in Shenzhen or Shanghai. Mandarin is not required (deal documentation will be in English) but is preferred. A solid reason to be in China and a commitment to that market is required of course. This new hire will likely be US qualified (but could also be qualified in UK or other jurisdictions) and with experience and training at a top law firm’s IP transactional / TMT practice and could be currently at a law firm or in-house. Qualified candidates currently Asia based, Europe based or US based will be considered. The new hire’s supervisors in this technology transactions in-house team are very well regarded US trained IP transactional lawyers, with substantial experience at Silicon Valley firms. The culture and atmosphere in this in-house group and the company in general is entrepreneurial, team oriented, and the work is cutting edge, even for a cutting edge industry. The upside of being in an important strategic in-house position in this fast growing and world leading internet company is of the “sky is the limit” variety. Its a very exciting place to be in China for a rising IP transactional lawyer in our opinion, for many reasons beyond the basic info we can share here in this ad / post. This is a special A+ opportunity.
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