Lawyer of the Day

Do Canadian Lawyers Have Potty Mouths?

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If you say bad words, these people will come and your wrists will never be the same.

The Law Society of Upper Canada has its panties in a twist. Apparently there are a few lawyers up there who have been exhibiting “uncivil behavior,” and the society wants it to stop.

I know what you are thinking: Isn’t everybody in Canada nice (except for Scott; he’s a dick)? Well, it would seem that we have been misled. Once they get their legal training, it seems that Canadian lawyers can be every bit as foul-mouthed and inappropriate as the most snarling trash talker we can find from Wisconsin.

And sure, while most people who do not have a stick genetically grafted up their butts find language issues to be trivial, the good people of the Law Society of Upper Canada demand that action be taken!

What has them all up in arms?

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Lawyer of the Day: Las Vegas Drug Prosecutor Arrested for… Drugs

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Paris Hilton

Maybe it’s time for us to have a national conversation about legalizing drugs. It’s interesting to see how many folks in charge of enforcing and administering our nation’s drug laws seem to have drug problems themselves.

We all recall the sad story of former federal judge Jack Camp. After years of sending offenders off to prison for narcotics offenses, ex-Judge Camp pleaded guilty to drug offenses of his own. He was sentenced to 30 days in prison — less time than what Paris Hilton got.

And speaking of Paris Hilton, it seems that one of her former prosecutors — a top drug-crime prosecutor in Las Vegas — was just arrested.

For what? For drugs….

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February Lawyer of the Month: We’re Starting To See A Pattern Here

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Whoops. Even though the polls closed about a week ago, we forgot to announce our Lawyer of the Month for February.

So let’s get to it. Who is Above the Law’s latest honoree?

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Is the Florida Foreclosure King Abdicating? David J. Stern Will Close His Law Firm

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Back in September 2010, we bestowed Lawyer of the Day honors upon David J. Stern, aka Florida’s “Foreclosure King.” We noted Stern’s rise into the ranks of self-made millionaires, despite not having attended some fancy first-tier law school. (Stern graduated from the South Texas College of Law, a fourth-tier school.)

We marveled at Stern’s wealth: a $14 million mansion here, a $7 million condo there, Ferraris and Porsches galore, and a 130-foot, $20 million yacht. We noted that Stern, thanks to the success of his booming foreclosure-law practice, was “running financial circles around all those Stanford and NYU law grads who wound up as Biglaw partners.”

Alas, in the past few months, David Stern’s fortunes have taken a turn for the worse….

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Would-Be-Lawyer of the Day: Don’t Put ☺ in a Court Filing

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Here’s some good news for lawyers who enjoy blogging or instant-messenger services like Gchat. It’s right in the headline of this here National Law Journal story: Smiley face, snark, don’t render law grad unfit to practice.

Many of us get snarky in our personal writing, and many of us employ emoticons in email messages or Gchat exchanges. As litigators well know, sometimes a cold transcript doesn’t adequately convey tone. For this reason, I’ve even seen federal judges use winking smiley-face emoticons in email messages.

But you shouldn’t use smiley faces in documents you file with the court — even the super-icky courts that hear traffic appeals (yes, they exist). This is a lesson that Marilyn Ringstaff, a 2006 graduate of John Marshall Law School, learned the hard way….

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Lawyer of the Month: February Reader Poll

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On Twitter, somebody told me that “February is the Monday of months.” So true. For such a short month, February just drags on and on and on. Maybe it does make sense to dump Black History Month in February, because the month is like the freaking Middle Passage, bringing us to the tyranny of hay-fever season.

In any event, now that it’s over, let’s take a look back at the lawyers who made news in the month of February and ask you to pick a Lawyer of the Month. Just like last month, there are no specific criteria — just vote for the lawyer or lawyers you think most deserve the title.

Let’s get to this month’s nominees….

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Why People Don’t Like Lawyer Tenants

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Gene Hackman as Lex Luthor

Oh, condominiums. To own your own box of air in the sky, subject to the terms and conditions of your neighbors and building managers. Lex Luthor always had this right: either you own land or ponces wearing underwear on the outside can swoop in and ruin your good time.

We’ve got a couple of lawyer/condo issues floating around, so let’s tackle them together. We’ve got a Miami judge who allegedly likes to kick in doors to her own unit. And we’ve a New York lawyer who wants satisfaction over 109 missing square feet…

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January Lawyer of the Month Restores Faith in Humanity

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Thank you, Above the Law readers. The results are in for January’s Lawyer of the Month, and I can happily report that I do not write for an audience comprised solely of heartless, cynical d-bags.

Seriously, I’m going to be able to talk to my mother about what I do for a living for a whole week.

In a month that had some worthwhile competitors, one lawyer stood out above the rest…

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Lawyer of the Month: January Reader Poll

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As many of you know, one of our running features here at Above the Law is Lawyer of the Day. We don’t literally name one every day, but we like to keep you informed of the famous and infamous lawyers of the world. At the end of the year, we give you guys an opportunity to vote for a Lawyer of the Year.

Apparently you guys like to vote on lawyers, so why limit the experience to once a year? Above the Law has decided to let you crown a lawyer every month. We’ll pick the nominees (going forward, feel free to submit nominees to us at tips@abovethelaw.com, and you’ll vote for the most deserving. There are no specific criteria — just vote for the lawyer or lawyers you think most deserve the title.

Let’s get to this month’s nominees…

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Lawyer of the Day: The Foreskin Restorer

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Gone baby gone.

It’s been pretty slow here at the Above the Law circumcision law desk. So slow, in fact, that Lat has considered putting me on another assignment: “There’s just not enough news surrounding the intersection of foreskin and the legal community. While I appreciate your enthusiasm for the amusing dong beat…I don’t know if the financials can possibly justify keeping you on.”

Every time he starts in on this speech, I have to break out a photo of 16 vaguely ethnic kids that I claim to take care of. This happens at least twice a week.

So you can imagine how excited I was to find this fascinating tale that might shock and amaze you. It’s the story of a full-time lawyer and part-time exhibitionist named….

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