Lawyer of the Day

Lawyer of the Day: Seth Zimmerman

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box for mailing Above the Law Legal Blog.JPGWe’ve all done it: Use of office resources for personal purposes. Maybe you take the occasional personal call on your office telephone. Maybe you used the work fax machine to receive a one-page tax document from your accountant. Maybe you took some paperwork home with you one night, along with an office-issued ballpoint pen, and later used that pen to take down your mother’s chicken casserole recipe, as she read it to you over the phone.
If it’s de minimis use, then it’s okay. But this might have been, um, de maximus:

According to court records, while an attorney in the FTC’s Bureau of Competition, Seth Zimmerman used his office’s Federal Express account to send Redskins tickets to eBay bidders….

The FTC says he cost the federal government $1,938. FedEx also says it lost $3,880 due to the discount shipping rate given to the federal government. According to the plea agreement, Zimmerman also profited by charging each buyer an additional $12 fee for the FedEx delivery.

Two grand strikes us as a sizable sum. But there is room for argument. Zimmerman might respond: “Come on, feds, lighten up! Isn’t that just, like, three Pentagon toilet seats — not even the padded kind?”
So how was the fraud detected? Was an elaborate investigation required?

In August 2004, investigators at the Office of Inspector General for the FTC were contacted by people complaining that tickets they bought from Zimmerman on eBay were never delivered.

What could have been some difficult Internet sleuthing was made easier because Zimmerman used his FTC e-mail address to set up his eBay account. The inspector general subpoenaed records from eBay showing that Zimmerman had been buying and selling tickets on the site since 2001.

Seth, it’s called Gmail. Try it, you might like it.
(Yes, we know: even if Zimmerman had used Gmail, if he used it from his work computer, messages could still be traced back to him using his IP address. But at least then the investigators would have WORK a little to uncover his identity, instead of having it served up on a silver platter.)
Penalty Box: FTC Lawyer No ‘Overnight Sensation’ [Legal Times (pass-through link) via NYLawyer.com]

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Lawyer of the Day: Robert Wayne Hallock

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man in suit grabbing cash.jpgYou’re a partner at the Chicago powerhouse law firm of Kirkland & Ellis, which generally ranks as the most profitable non-New York Biglaw firm in the country. But you decide that a six- to seven-figure income isn’t enough for your needs. So you do this:

1. Sell fraudulent certificates of deposit for $1.8 million.
2. Set up a bank account in the name of an LLC in Florida for the money.
3. Hire somebody to use the money to buy cashiers checks.
4. Proceed to blow hundreds of thousands of dollars on a girlfriend, a wedding, a honeymoon, and his Barrington, IL. lifestyle.
5. Leave the money off your tax return.

This is the scheme hatched by former K&E partner Robert Hallock. Not surprisingly, it didn’t work:

A Chicago-area attorney was convicted of tax evasion in federal court Wednesday for attempting to hide more than $1 million from the IRS. Robert W. Hallock, 62, a former partner at Kirkland & Ellis, was convicted in a bench trial of earning some $1.8 million in 1997 from the sale of fraudulent certificates of deposit.

Hallock funneled the money through a Florida bank account and used it to buy two cars, a truck and nearly $145,000 in jewelry, said Atlanta-based U.S. Atty. David Nahmais, whose office handled the case. He also gave $150,000 to his girlfriend and her parents, prosecutors charged.

Hallock sounds like a criminal and a moron. But he does get points for cojones and creativity. Here’s what he argued at trial:

[Hallock] argued that since [he] was obligated under the UCC to repay the money, he did not have any income — in his words, “a good faith belief, even if crazy, negates willfulness.”

Leave it to a tax lawyer to come up with an argument like that.
Former Kirkland & Ellis Partner Convicted of Tax Evasion [TaxProf Blog]
Bad Barrington Barrister Busted [Roth & Company, P.C.]
Chicago-Area Attorney Convicted of Tax Evasion [Chicago Tribune]

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Above the Law Lawyers of the Day: Kirk McCormick and James Murphy

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Thanks to all of you who are already sending in tips to our inbox. Keep it up! The good-natured fun of ATL isn’t possible without your help. So go ahead, email us something interesting or amusing.
One of you kindly drew our attention to this lawyer advertisement, which is our basis for awarding Colorado Springs plaintiffs’ lawyers Kirk McCormick and James Murphy our coveted Lawyer of the Day prize.
It seems like the advertisment has been around for a while. But we haven’t seen or read about it before today, so we’ll pass it along to you (via parenthetical statement):
jesus saves christian law firm.jpg
Tony Sciascia of Parenthetical Statement is offended:

I saw this print advertisement for lawyers in a Colorado Springs phone book. It immediately made my mouth agape, shocked and horrified by either such bigotry or such blatant pandering to the Focus on the Family geared residents of the Springs.

What do you think? Is this legal? Is it ethical? Perhaps not — but even if it’s neither of those, it’s certainly tacky and speaks volumes of the persons who would create such divisive, insulting advertising.

We’re less upset. We wouldn’t want to be represented by you anyway, McCormick & Murphy.
For personal injury work, we hire only Jews.*
jesus saves [parenthetical statement]
McCormick & Murphy, PC [actually, not very "PC" at all]
* The same goes for M&A work. (Disclosure: We used to work here.)

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Above the Law Lawyer of the Day: William DiSalvatore

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William Disalvatore Above the Law.JPGThe lawyers who get accused of professional misconduct are often solo practitioners, or partners in tiny firms you’ve never heard of. So it’s refreshing when a Biglaw partner gets nailed on ethical charges. And it’s especially refreshing when the lawyer involved was once named by the National Law Journal as one of the country’s top litigators under 40.
His name? William P. DiSalvatore. His firm? Prestigious powerhouse WilmerHale (New York office). His inappropriate conduct? Uh, how much time do you have?

A former rising star in the intellectual property practice of WilmerHale has resigned from the bar after admitting to a litany of misconduct, including falsifying expense reports, forging client signatures and assigning associates to perform “pro bono” work for friends and family….

In his affidavit, Mr. DiSalvatore admitted to misconduct of unusual breadth. He said he had falsified credit card receipts to claim reimbursement from his firm for $109,000 in personal expenses. He also said he forged client signatures on a consent to joint representation and on a conflict waiver. He also admitted misleading a client into believing an appellate brief was still at the draft stage when it had already been filed.

Wow, that’s quite impressive. And there’s more. Check it out after the jump.

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Above the Law Lawyer of the Day: Joseph Caramagno

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joseph caramagno joe caramagno Above the Law Legal Blog.JPG

Lawyer of the day? Hell, let’s give Joseph Caramagno the whole week:

After a lawyer due to defend a man against a kidnapping charge showed up to court late and smelling of booze last week, a Clark County District Court judge ordered the attorney to take a Breathalyzer test in open court, then declared a mistrial when the test confirmed her suspicions.

In a remarkable exchange captured by the courtroom’s video camera, District Judge Michelle Leavitt ordered defense attorney Joseph Caramagno to submit to the test after she smelled alcohol on his breath.

The result indicated that Caramagno’s blood-alcohol level was 0.075. In Nevada, it is illegal to drive with a blood-alcohol level of 0.08 or higher.

C’mon, Judge Leavitt, lighten up! The practice of law isn’t that hard. Defending a guy against kidnapping charges is much easier than driving — especially if the car’s a stick-shift.
And that’s not all; the story gets even better. Here’s a three-word teaser: black halter top. Check it out, after the jump.

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