Lesbians

Ed. note: Have a question for next week? Send it in to advice@abovethelaw.com

ATL:

I am a 2L at Columbia and I am deciding amongst Cravath, Davis Polk, Debevoise (Elie should chime in now), Paul Weiss, and Sullivan & Cromwell.

I am getting married in December so I would love to work at a family-friendly firm. Like Elie, I’m a raging liberal, and I heard Paul Weiss seems to fit that bill. On the other hand, I want to be at a firm with plenty of lovely women. I am bi and my soon-to-be hubby doesn’t mind if I taste a woman’s sweet nectar. Plus I simply cannot live without a pair of supple breasts in my life. (My man is ripped so no manboobs for me.) I met many cute associates at Davis Polk too and I remember an ATL article that mentions the great number of hotties at DPW.

So many choices! Can you help me out?

— Paradox of Choice

Dear Paradox of Choice,

Nice try, but this question’s a flame because nobody uses the term “sweet nectar” unless they’re (1) referring to the drink Odysseus used to get the Cyclops drunk and poke his eye out, or (2) a copywriter at Cosmo. Nevertheless, we’ll answer it because it’s slim pickings around here this week, and it’s better than another snooze-alert “should I quit law school?” question.  Of course you should quit law school. Don’t be ridiculous.

Let’s break down these firms…

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Just because it’s Saturday doesn’t mean you can escape document review — or at least talking about document review.

A liveblog of the Lavender Law panel on e-discovery, after the jump.

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Liveblogging of this interesting panel about judicial nominations at the National LGBT Bar Association’s Annual Lavender Law Career Fair and Conference, after the jump.

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We’re here at the National LGBT Bar Association’s Annual Lavender Law Career Fair and Conference, attending a great panel about relationship recognition (aka marriage equality aka same-sex marriage).

You can access the liveblog after the jump.

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Judge Sidney Thomas

The three-judge motions panel — consisting of Judges Edward Leavy, Michael Daly Hawkins, and Sidney Thomas — has issued a stay pending appeal in Perry v. Schwarzenegger, the case in which Judge Vaughn Walker (N.D. Cal.) struck down Proposition 8’s ban on gay marriage in California.

More about the ruling and a link to the order, after the jump.

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Chief Judge Vaughn Walker (N.D. Cal.), who struck down Proposition 8’s ban on gay marriage in California, has denied a motion to stay his judgment pending appeal. This means that same-sex marriages in California can start immediately after August 18 at 5 PM, assuming the Ninth Circuit doesn’t grant a stay.

UPDATE (3:45 PM): No immediate gay weddings — see court order below (after the jump). Judge Walker denied a full stay pending appeal, but he did enter a stay of his judgment until August 18, 2010, at 5 PM PDT. This will give Prop 8 proponents time to appeal to the Ninth Circuit…

UPDATE (4:25 PM): Do they have standing to defend Prop 8 on the merits in the appellate court? There is a rub here. Read more after the jump.

A link to the court order and excerpts, after the jump.

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Alleged shoplifter Shannon Marketic, in happier times.

* Congratulations to the best LGBT lawyers under 40! Check out the list — perhaps you know some of them? [National LGBT Bar Association]

* Speaking of gays in the law, if you’re obsessing over Judge Vaughn Walker’s sexual orientation, stop it. Just stop it. [Huffington Post]

* First Rudolph Giuliani’s daughter gets busted shoplifting beauty products, and now the same thing happens with a former Miss USA. The lesson: beauty products are way too expensive. [CBS / Crimesider]

* You think legal outsourcing is only going to affect the lives of junior associates? As Larry Ribstein explains, it’s very likely that outsourcing will lead to a fundamental change in the way we regulate lawyers and law firms. [Forbes]

* The only person who can get away with acting like Judge Judy is Judge Judy. [Bad Lawyer]

* Ann Althouse thinks peep-toe shoes are just fine — and has fabulous taste in shoes herself, by the way. [Althouse]

* How come all of the top philanderers are men? That’s just sexist. [Law and More]

How is everybody doing this day after bigotry was dealt a setback? Based on an Above the Law reader poll, about 80 percent of you think that Chief Judge Vaughn Walker (N.D. Cal.) did the right thing when he struck down California’s Proposition 8.

So gay people in California may soon be able to engage in the lovely “sh** or get off the pot” conversation that dominates the life of every guy who has been dating the same girl for more than a couple of years. Yay, congratulations!

But are gays and lesbians really sure they want marriage equality? After the cake, the reception, and the honeymoon, there are a bunch of… obligations that attach to marriage. Just look at New York. We don’t even have gay marriage here, and yet same-sex partners will find themselves on the hook for all sorts of things…

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Our typical Lawyer of the Day is an attorney you’ve never heard of, from a firm you’ve never heard of. It’s highly unusual for LOTD honors to go to a pair of legal titans, two of the nation’s leading litigators: Ted Wells (pictured) and Marty Flumenbaum, the co-chair and former chair, respectively, of the celebrated litigation department at Paul Weiss.

It appears, however, that the honors are deserved. The New York Law Journal reports:

A New Jersey judge has sanctioned two firms, Paul, Weiss, Rifkind, Wharton & Garrison and Lowenstein Sandler, for pursuing a “frivolous” and “ridiculous” legal claim on behalf of billionaire Ronald Perelman against his 85-year-old ex-father-in-law [Robert Cohen]….

Superior Court Judge Ellen L. Koblitz ruled that Perelman’s attorneys should have known that the claim was unsupportable. “No competent attorney could have missed the frivolous nature of this promise claim once the unhelpful testamentary documents were received,” Koblitz said in ordering the sanctions last Wednesday. “There was no legal or factual basis for the plaintiffs to proceed with their amended complaint given the evidence they had and the state of the law in New Jersey.”

Ouch — quite the stinging benchslap. The Garden State hasn’t seen such a slugging since the first season of Jersey Shore.

And other marquee names got dragged into this mess — a pair of high-powered lady lawyers, in fact….

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So you’ve been laid off. What do you do? There are so many options: sulk; cry; send out résumés; try to sell your degree; spend time in the Above the Law comments section, complaining about your deadbeat firm…

Or you could take your 2009 Porsche Cayman S on a road trip across America. That’s what a laid-off sixth-year associate did when she got canned by her prestigious AmLaw 20 firm. The associate from an East Coast office is keeping her identity under wraps, so we’ll call her Porschia.

The “double ivy league educated corporate lawyer” started a blog about her adventures, called Driving with Gusto, which has beautiful photos of spacious skies, amber waves of grain, and purple mountain majesties.

While the Porsche is a manual, we wouldn’t say she drives stick. Porschia is a lesbian, and so there are many fun tales of hot girl-on-girl action from across the fruited plains…

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