Music

X-Summers: The Bruised Booze Cruiser

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X Men small X Summers X Summer Associates Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgLabor Day has come and gone. But even though summer is unofficially over, we still have a few summer associate stories for you.
We heard lots of rumors about the Chicago summer who, as described by one source, “got decked by a girl” after a firm-sponsored, Fourth of July boat cruise. According to one version of the story, he showed up to work the next day black and blue.
After poking around, we’ve assembled what we believe to be a fairly reliable account of the incident. The black-and-blue part isn’t true, but the general outlines of the story are accurate:
1. Superhero name: The Bruised Booze Cruiser
2. Special power(s): Improvised musical composition; ability to take it on the chin, from a member of the fairer sex.
3. Summered: Kirkland & Ellis, Chicago, summer 2007
4. Claim to fame: From our tipster:

After the Fourth of July boat cruise, one of the summers tied one too many on. At the after-party, while passing a drink to a friend, he stuck it right across the face of a girl standing nearby.

Understandably annoyed, the girl said something sort of snarky. He responded by a signing an improvised song to her, which went something like, “Fat bitch, fat bitch, you are such a fat bitch.”

After he went on for about a minute, she decided she had had enough of his ditty. She emptied her drink over his head — then socked him in the jaw.

Awesome. We’re applying the “You Go Girl” tag to this post.
Find out the Booze Cruiser’s fate, both medically and professionally, after the jump.

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Weird Al Song Becomes Tort Reform Anthem

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From the National Examiner:

The American Tort Reform Association has posted Weird Al’s “I’ll Sue Ya” on its Web site, suggesting that the tune be “adopted as a theme song by America’s personal injury lawyers.”
“It’s been awhile since I’ve personally kept up with Weird Al’s work, but it’s nice to know he hasn’t lost his genius,” ATRA director of communications Darren McKinney said.
“Like all good comedy, Weird Al builds on a foundation of truth,” he added.

What foundation of truth, that there are too many lawsuits in this country, or that Korn sucks?
Check out the music video for Weird Al’s tune after the jump.
Related:
American Tort Reform Association
“Weird Al” Yankovic

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Lawyer of the Day: Peter ‘P’Ta Mon’ John

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If the Nixon Peabody song were lawyer advertising — which, of course, it is not — it would be the best lawyer advertisement ever.
And this, which a helpful reader emailed to us, would be second best:
ONeal Legal LLC Peter John Peter P'Ta Mon John JD MBA Above the Law blog.JPG
In case you can’t read the fine print at the bottom — which offers some helpful tips on staying out of trouble with the law, but which should NOT be construed as legal advice — here’s a close up:
ONeal Legal LLC 2 Peter John Peter P'Ta Mon John JD MBA Above the Law blog.JPG
Right now you’re probably thinking: This CANNOT be for real.
But it is, dear readers, it is. We confirmed the authenticity of this advertisement with Mr. Peter John himself.
You can check out our short interview with him, after the jump.

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Everyone’s A Winner – Again!

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Best Week Ever Nixon Peabody Above the Law blog.jpgCongratulations to Nixon Peabody. All of the “winners” at that venerable law firm are winners once again. VH1′s Best Week Ever just named the firm’s non-theme-song song its Favorite Jam of Summer ’07!
We kid you not. See here:

“Everyone’s a Winner at Nixon Peabody” is officially our Favorite Jam of Summer 07! The type of tune that makes you want to get out the Bartles & James, brush n’ braid your long gray hair, tear off your stirrup pants and miniature horse cardigan, and make out with your 77-year-old husband on a nude beach somewhere in Pueto Vallarta.

You can read the full post here. Once again, congrats to NP!
Ladies and Gentlemen, It’s Never Too Late for a Hot Summer Jam, Courtesy of Blood-Sucking Law Firm [Best Week Ever]

Nixon Peabody ThemeSongGate: A Synopsis

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Nixon Peabody LLP horrible theme song Above the Law blog.jpgRight now some of you are probably thinking: “Enough already about Alberto Gonzales and Michael Vick! Isn’t there anything else you can write about?”

Of course. Let’s go back to the story of Nixon Peabody, and its ridiculous law firm theme song!

(In preemptive response to those of you who are sick and tired of this story: relax. It’s on its last legs. But if the New York Times writes about us, of course we’re going to acknowledge it. Capice?)

For those of you were on vacation last week — and we know many of you were, based on all the “Out of Office AutoReply” messages we received — you missed a fun story here at ATL.

But don’t worry. If you don’t have time to read our voluminous coverage of the Nixon Peabody theme song, here are some cheat sheets.

You can read this New York Times story, by Michael de la Merced, which nicely summarizes the saga. Or this post, by Peter Lattman, over at the WSJ Law Blog.

Best of all, for those of you who can watch videos — some of you can’t, ’cause you don’t have a private office — check out this awesome video. It appeared over the weekend, but we’re reposting it, because many of you don’t visit ATL on the weekend (and it would be a shame for you to miss it).


Unauthorized Enjoyment of Song Irks Law Firm [New York Times]
Everyone’s a Winner at Nixon Peabody! [WSJ Law Blog]
Re: Nixon Peabody [YouTube]

Nixon Peabody ThemeSongGate: This Story Has Legs

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Please see the short parody video posted below. Is this a casebook-ready example of “fair use,” or what?
To ChurchHatesTucker, who produced the video: You are a genius and a god.
(Please note that we had no hand in making this video. ChurchHatesTucker acted sua sponte, after reading this Techdirt story.)
Update: Blawg Review, quoting from Nixon Peabody’s own Copyright & Internet Law Glossary, explains why the video is fair use over here.

Re. Nixon Peabody [YouTube]

Nixon Peabody ThemeSongGate: A Linkwrap

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Nixon Peabody LLP horrible theme song Above the Law blog.jpgSadly, the humorless crew over at Nixon Peabody has had their fabulous law firm song — which, mind you, is NOT a theme song — pulled from YouTube. See here.
Even if it’s gone from YouTube, you can still access “Everyone’s A Winner” as a plain-vanilla MP3 file. Just click here. We incorporate by reference all of our prior commentary on the song.
This memorable tune will also live on in the blogosphere. Numerous fine websites and blogs picked up on the story of the Nixon Peabody song controversy. Here are a few links:
1. Law Firms, the Blogosphere, and Unexpected Attention [Volokh Conspiracy (Orin Kerr)]
2. That ridiculous Nixon Peabody “theme song” was for real [Daily Intelligencer / New York Magazine]
3. Wow. Big law is so lame. With a capital “L” [Legal Antics (Nicole Black)]
4. Nixon Peabody Throws Fantastic Tantrum: Threatens Blogger Over Leaked Song [Keeping Up With Jonas]
5. Blogger contends posting silly leaked law firm song is fair use [ZDNet (Denise Howell)]
6. Everyone’s a Winner (or, Friday Music Blog) [PrawfsBlawg (Liz Glazer)]
7. Sorry, but no one involved is a winner [IPTAblog (Andrew Raff)]
8. Best/Worst Law Firm Song. Ever. [the (non)billable hour (Matt Homann)]
9. OMG…The Worst Song Ever [Two Guitar Heroes and a Cat]
10. Everyone Is A Winner At Nixon Peabody [The Dish Daily]
11. Nobody Is Above the Law [Galley Slaves (Jonathan Last)]
If you know of a link that’s missing, feel free to email us, and we can add it. Thanks!
Update: Additional links:
12. Sure, your firm just gave you a $25k raise, but do you have a theme song? [Sophistic Miltonian Serbonian Blog]
13. Law Firm Going Crazy to Keep Its Corporate Song Off the Internet [The Startup Lawyer]
14. Law Firm Freaks Out That Ridiculous Corporate Song Leaked Out To Blogs [Techdirt]
15. Re. Nixon Peabody [YouTube (ChurchHatesTucker)]
Everyone’s A Winner at Nixon Peabody (mp3 file)
Earlier: Prior ATL coverage of Nixon Peabody (scroll down)

Nixon Peabody ThemeSongGate: An Update

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Nixon Peabody LLP horrible theme song Above the Law blog.jpgOur most recent post about Nixon Peabody — which has a song, but NOT a theme song — is about to scroll off the ATL front page. And we couldn’t allow that, now could we?
So here’s an update. A few brief points:
1. Some of you have described a fabulous video that accompanied “Everyone’s A Winner at Nixon Peabody.” Sadly, we’ve never seen this video. If you have a copy, please send it to us.
2. We received the song, from multiple sources, as an MP3 file. It was being widely disseminated by email (“FW: FW: FW:”). As far as we know, it was not sent to us by a disgruntled ex-Winner (contrary to the quasi-paranoid speculation of NP brass).
3. As of now, the song remains on YouTube. It has been viewed almost 14,000 times and garnered several accolades, including #26 – Most Viewed (Entertainment) and #11 – Most Linked (Entertainment).
4. In case the song gets yanked from YouTube, you can now access it directly on ATL, as an MP3 file. Just click here. Enjoy!
5. Some of you have inquired into the identities of the NP representatives with whom we spoke yesterday. These individuals expressly asked not to be identified by name (quelle surprise), and we agreed to that request. But we can tell you that they were in-house reps, not external PR people. One is a firm spokesperson, and one works on the business side of the firm. As far as we know, neither is a lawyer.
We haven’t heard more from the firm since yesterday afternoon’s phone call. If we do hear from them again, rest assured that we will let you know.
Everyone’s A Winner at Nixon Peabody (mp3 file)

Non-Sequiturs: 08.23.07

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Linda Greenhouse 6 New York Times Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpg* The best argument for immigration reform: qualified (i.e., hot) fashion models are being kept off American runways. [Fashionista]
* What rating does ATL get — e.g., G, PG, R, etc. — using this tool? To give you context, NBS is a PG-13. [Nasty, Brutish & Short]
* What blogs does Linda Greenhouse read? [My Times ("Journalist's Picks") via Romenesko]
* What blogs do judges read? [May It Please the Court]
* And what blogs should they read? [Blawg Review]
* Speaking of judges, here’s our Judge of the Day — possibly offensive, and wrong on the law too. [AP via NYT]
* The Weekly Standard’s Jonathan Last, on the Nixon Peabody non-theme-song: “Some things you just can’t un-hear.” [Galley Slaves]

Nixon Peabody: This Is Not a Love Theme Song

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Nixon Peabody LLP horrible theme song Above the Law blog.jpgWe’ve been in touch with representatives of the Nixon Peabody law firm about the musical composition that we posted (mp3) and wrote about this morning. First they sent us a statement by email:

“This song was put together in celebration of Nixon Peabody’s Fortune 100 ‘Best Places to Work’ recognition. Nixon Peabody aims to be the best law firm to work with and the best law firm to work for. Fun is not prohibited here.”

Fair enough. But then we spoke with two firm spokespersons by telephone. They called us.

It wasn’t a very “[f]un” conversation. They weren’t happy campers. Even if they may be winners, since “everyone’s a winner at Nixon Peabody.”

this is not a pipe this is not a theme song Nixon Peabody NP Above the Law blog.jpgThey emphasized that the song was internal to the firm and is protected by copyright. They also insisted that it is NOT a “theme song” — in any way, shape or form.

They demanded to know who sent the song to us. We informed them that we don’t reveal our sources, unless served with a subpoena (and maybe not even then — a Judy Miller-style jail stint might be good publicity for ATL).

They asserted copyright over the song and asked us to take it down, from our site and from YouTube. We stated our view that posting and commenting on the song constitutes fair use. It also falls within our newsgathering mission as a media organization.

We explained that our site is all about law firms and the legal profession. They said: “We know what you’re about.”

They claimed the person who leaked this song is “in a fight” with Nixon Peabody, and menacingly stated that they (meaning NP) “don’t intend to let this thing lie.” We informed them that we have no desire to get involved in the firm’s purported dispute with this unnamed individual. And that’s where we left things.

More thoughts after the jump.

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Someone Deserves To Be Shot Over This

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Nixon Peabody LLP horrible theme song Above the Law blog.jpgThe horror! The horror! Multiple sources have forwarded us the MP3 of the frightening Nixon Peabody “theme song,” which is now making the rounds by email.
We didn’t receive it directly from a source at the firm, so it’s theoretically possible that it’s fake. We have contacted Nixon Peabody for comment and will let you know if and when we hear back from them. But in the meantime, we’re inclined to agree with this tipster:

“I wanted to believe it wasn’t real, but it’s so professional. Hard to believe that this wasn’t the product of a misguided recruiting effort and wasted bonus dollars.”

Update (12:05 PM): We’ve been in touch with a Nixon Peabody spokesperson about the song (which is real). We’ll be posting a statement from the firm shortly.
On the musical merits, the song itself is just as horrific as the idea of a law firm theme song. Yes, we miss the eighties, but not this much. The lyrics include such gems as “Everyone’s a winner at Nixon Peabody” (the chorus) and “It’s all about the team, it’s all about respect, it all revolves around integri-tee yeah.”
Check it out for yourself below. But we’re warning you: even though the Nixon Peabody anthem is dreadful, it’s as catchy as HPV. If that “everyone’s a winner” chorus gets stuck in your head for the rest of today, don’t blame us.
But if you’re a plaintiff’s lawyer who wants to file a class action against Nixon Peabody, on behalf of all listeners who do get earworm from this song, please include us in the plaintiff class. Thank you.
(The reason the screen says “Digital Media Converter Trial Version — Please Download” is because we converted the mp3 file to video using a free trial of this file conversion program.)
Update / Correction (2:55 PM): This song is NOT a “theme song.” It was prepared for internal use only, and it was sent to us without the firm’s prior knowledge or consent. The firm objects to all non-internal use of the song. More details here.
Further Update: The YouTube link below is now dead, but you can access the MP3 by clicking here. Or better yet, check out this awesome video.

Everyone’s A Winner at Nixon Peabody [MP3 file]
Nixon Peabody theme song [YouTube]

Sentencing Reform: Dancing Will Set You Free

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We’re guessing you’ve all seen this video of 1,500 Filipino prisoners dancing to Michael Jackson’s “Thriller.” It has been discussed all over the blogosphere and MSM. E.g, Gawker; Concurring Opinions; Times of London.
(We’re just surprised that sentencing guru Doug Berman — who, by the way, moderated a great panel on the federal sentencing guidelines at the recent ACS convention we attended (and will write about later) — hasn’t weighed in on this innovative approach to criminal punishment.)
In case you haven’t seen it, here’s the clip:
Cebu Philippines Filipino prisoners prison inmates dancing Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpg
Pretty cool, eh? Professor Charles Nesson of Harvard Law School quipped, “I want to meet the warden.”
Well, Professor Nesson, we can help. As it turns out, Byron Garcia — the prison official who came up with this idea, and uploaded the video clip to YouTube — is our uncle!
You can read our correspondence with Tito Byron, after the jump.

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