Law school commencement speakers have a tough gig, coming up with original pearls of wisdom for people who already know it all. We wish this year's crop of speakers luck! The TaxProf Blog has a list up of the chosen few here (also available after the jump).

ATL has a top ten list for you, with the reason he or she made the cut. In no particular order:

1/2/3. Stephen Breyer, at American University / Samuel Alito, at Catholic University / Stephen Breyer, at Northeastern

Breyer- 2. Alito- 1. The rest of SCOTUS- 0.

4. Jerry Springer, at Northwestern

For the ability to generate a comment clusterf*ck. Our question: Will there be midgets?

5. Timothy Finchem (Commissioner of PGA Tour), at UVA

Maybe he'll offer golf swing advice. That's probably more useful than the usual commencement speech wisdom.

6. Scott Turow (legal novelist), at Loyola-New Orleans

As suspenseful as his novels are, we bet he can craft an exciting graduation speech.

7. Sandra Day O'Connor, at William & Mary

As good as a sitting justice? Maybe better, since she can spill more dirt.

8. Ted Turner, at Baltimore

Perhaps the CNN founder will talk about how Nancy Grace has changed the face of justice reporting. Her report on an 18-month-old forced to smoke a marijuana pipe. Wow. Inspirational.

9. AG Michael Mukasey, at Boston College

No Founder's Medal for you!

10. Ohio AG Mark Dann, at Case Western

We hope he rolls up in the "Sunshine Express," his SUV with flames down the side. And brings his trouble-making posse.

Law School Commencement Speakers [TaxProf Blog]

Over the past few months, a number of you have written to us about A Lawyer Walks Into a Bar. It's a critically acclaimed, independent documentary film about lawyers and the legal profession.

The movie made the rounds on the film festival circuit earlier this year, and now it's out on DVD. Here's a brief synopsis:

A Lawyer Walks Into a Bar... is a celebration of the law and triumph over adversity that follows 6 future lawyers of all ages and backgrounds as they undertake the rigorous and excruciating California Bar Exam while also dealing thematically with certain hot button issues in our profession. The [themes of the film] include, among other things, stress, big firm economics, substance abuse, law as a calling, frivolous litigation, bar exam economics, women in the law and other threads that you can likely intuit.

These subjects are all near and dear to the hearts of ATL readers. And there's stuff in the film that ties into this week's special theme, non-top-tier law school graduates:

The cast members run the gamut, from a former Marine who has taken and failed the California Bar Exam 41 times, to top and middle graduates of the Loyola and UCLA Law Schools, to a Latina activist from East L.A. who attended a non-accredited law school, to other diverse and interesting people.

Sadly, the film was produced before the rise to fame of Loyola 2L. But it features other legal celebrities, such as Alan Dershowitz, Scott Turow, and Nancy Grace -- all of whom appear in this short clip:

Some of our favorite films are documentaries -- e.g., Spellbound, Capturing the Friedmans -- and some of our favorite people are lawyers. We haven't seen A Lawyer Walks Into a Bar yet, but we intend to; it looks like it's right up our alley. Exciting stuff!

A Lawyer Walks Into a Bar [official website]
A Lawyer Walks Into a Bar [trailer]
A Lawyer Walks Into A Bar [Amazon]

* New Jersey politics: Never a dull moment. [Wall Street Journal via Instapundit]

* Did Nancy Grace go too far in her grilling of Melinda Duckett? [MSNBC via Andrew Sullivan; Crime & Federalism]

* If you royally piss off a judge with a recusal request, which he denies, can you try to get him recused again? [New York Times via DealBreaker]

* Congrats to Andrew Sullivan and Glenn Reynolds. [Andrew Sullivan]

* Man with "suspicious package" arrested outside Supreme Court building. Write your own punchline -- it's Friday after 5, we're outta here. [SCOTUSblog]

Celebrity sighting columns are a staple of gossip magazines and gossip blogs. E.g., Gawker Stalker, Wonk'd, Judicial Sightations. So, in this spirit, we proudly present The Eyes of the Law -- your source for all the legal celebrity sightings that are fit to print (and a few that aren't).

Since we don't get out that much -- we get an electrical shock if we stray ten feet from our keyboard -- we need your help. We'll need you to make the sightings and submit them to us, by email (subject line: "Sighting"). Then we'll publish them on the internet, for all the world to enjoy. (We've already received a few; keep 'em coming!)

A few tips and guidelines to help you in your celeb-spotting:

(1) When you make a sighting, please be as observant as possible. How was the person looking -- hot, or not? What were they wearing? What kind of mood were they in? Were they alone, or with others?

(2) On a related note, digital photographs to support your sighting are especially welcome. A thousand words, etc.

(3) A true "sighting" requires seeing the personality outside of their natural habitat -- and preferably doing something that one might not expect them to be doing. So sightings of federal judges in courthouses and law school deans in the halls of their schools don't count. But we welcome sightings of judges or deans at, say, a baseball game -- or, better yet, a nudie bar.

Here are the types of people who qualify as sighting subjects in our book:

(1) any federal judge (but we're talking Article III here -- no bankruptcy or magistrate judges, ick);

(2) any member of a state's highest court;

(3) a state court judge from a lower court, but only if they're notorious for doing the kinds of things that state court judges are known for doing (e.g., using a penis pump on the bench, facilitating the escape of a violent felon, etc.);

(4) famous practicing lawyers, like David Boies, Ted Olson, Mark Geragos, or Ben Brafman (if you have to explain who they are, they're not famous);

(5) prominent law school deans, like current Yale dean Harold Koh, current Harvard dean Elena Kagan, and former Stanford dean Kathleen Sullivan;

(6) well-known law professors, like Laurence Tribe, Lawrence Lessig, Lani Guinier, or Anita Hill (no, your first-year legal writing instructor doesn't count); and

(7) law-related television personalities, like Judge Judy Sheindlin, Nancy Grace, or Jeffrey Toobin.

This list is not exhaustive; we may have overlooked certain categories of legal eagles that we'd like you to spot. But it gives you a good idea of the kinds of people we're interested in.

So enough idle chatter; get to it. Rustle up some juicy sightings, and submit them to us forthwith, by email. Much thanks!