An ATL reader sent along this holiday-themed photograph from the career services office of his top 20 law school. The picture struck us as perfect for a caption contest.
Same rules apply as always: Submit possible captions in the comments. We’ll choose our favorites — with preference given to those with a legal / law school bent — and then let you vote for the best one.
Please submit your entry BY NOON ON FRIDAY, and we’ll bring you our finalists on the eve of All Hallow’s Eve. Thanks!
* TP-ing is still an effective deterrent. [Going Concern]
* Could getting braces hurt a 1L’s job prospects? It’s hard to say, since there are no jobs for 1Ls anyway. [Corporette]
* Proskauer partner Jon Oram, a rising star of the sports law bar (and Lat’s law school classmate), was heavily involved in the sale of the Chicago Cubs. Oram’s a Yankees fan, so maybe some of that winning karma will rub off on Chicago’s lovable losers. [National Law Journal]
* Why is Shyne wearing an HLS T-shirt? [Baller Status]
* Is the 7th Circuit the coolest? [Blackbook Legal]
* Can you get in trouble for saying that creationism is religious, superstitious nonsense? [Bell & Bar]
* Body shots taken a bit too far. [Litination]
Ed. note: Have a question for next week? Send it in to [email protected].
Should I be paranoid about pictures from Halloween being posted on Facebook? Some people don’t have their profiles set to private, and I’m worried it will come up in a Facebook or Google search (eek!). Maybe I’m being too paranoid? I don’t know.
Planning on Going as a Slutty Nurse
Dear Planning on Going as a Slutty Nurse,
What’s so amazing about Halloween is that it’s the one day a year when you get a glimpse into the inner workings of other peoples’ minds. Everyone has an inner costume, and Halloween
Purim is when it’s socially acceptable to wear it outwardly. There is a kernel of truth behind every disguise, which is why Prince Harry’s Nazi costume a few years ago was so disturbing. You can’t possibly wear a Nazi costume unless you’re at least 1/4th Nazi. In Halloween, Veritas.
Your fear of Halloween pictures showing up on Facebook really sounds as if you’re afraid of others seeing the real, slutty nurse you. A vixen. A healer. An unoriginal. This year, I considered going as Sheryl Weinstein or Blanket. Surely those costumes speak volumes.
As I’ve said repeatedly in these Pls Hndle posts (we’ve been at this for over a year, btw!), you have to be yourself, no matter what the cost. That’s why I left the law. That’s why I subscribe to Dog Fancy. If you want to be a slutty nurse, be one, Facebook and Google footprint be damned. Live free or die hard.
This semester we have received several warnings from our Internet service provider that copyrighted movies and TV shows are being downloaded illegally via our wireless network. The Information Technology office is now ascertaining who is doing this. Once we have names of the individuals involved, we intend to give them to the copyright holders for enforcement purposes.
This stance proved unpopular with BLS students, as well as ATL readers. In a poll, about 75 percent of readers answered “yes” when asked, “Should Brooklyn Law School do more to protect its students from being sued for illegal downloading?”
It seems that Brooklyn Law School has had a change of heart. Check out the email that went out this afternoon, plus selected reader comments, after the jump.
Faithful Coca-Cola drinkers can laugh about this one. PepsiCo is having a rough month, reports the National Law Journal. PepsiCo’s purified water brand, Aquafina, has cost it a pretty penny.
Charles Joyce and James Voigt of Wisconsin sued PepsiCo earlier this year for stealing their idea of bottling and selling purified water. They claim that they had confidential discussions with distributors about the idea in 1981 and that the distributors passed those trade secrets along to Pepsi. It sounds like a bit of a ridiculous lawsuit; PepsiCo calls their accusations “dubious.”
But the Wisconsin men won. They won big. They won $1.26 billion dollars.
How did they win? By default judgment. PepsiCo’s lawyers never responded to the complaint, and the judge awarded the Wisconsin plaintiffs a default judgment.
Why did the Pepsi people never respond? Meet PepsiCo legal secretary, Kathy Henry.
Prominent Houston attorney John O’Quinn was one of two men who died this morning when their SUV slammed into a large tree on Allen Parkway after the driver apparently lost control, police said. …
It wasn’t immediately clear whether O’Quinn or the other, still-unidentified victim was driving.
O’Quinn is a huge name in Texas and around the country. He made his mark in PI work:
O’Quinn, who made his fortune largely in personal injury cases, most notably in successful breast implant cases in the early 1990s, was a local philantrhopist. He gave money to the Harris County Children’s Assessment Center, the Houston Council on Alcohol and Drugs and various Texas Medical Center institutions including St. Luke’s Hospital, which has a tower bearing his name.
Kaye Scholer has announced that its incoming first year associate will still be starting in January. All of them. But there is a catch. Kaye Scholer will split the class into two groups of full time associates. One group will work for the firm’s paying clients and get paid the normal first year starting salary. The other group — roughly half of the class — will work exclusively with the firm’s public interest group and will make $60,000.
Above the Law spoke with Kaye Scholer managing partner Barry Wilner about the program. He emphasized that the firm wanted to invite everybody in its first year class to start at the firm because the class is “excellent.” But he acknowledged that the demand for legal services isn’t what it used to be. Instead of sending half of its class back out on the street to look for public interest work, Wilner wanted to put them to work under the umbrella of Kaye Scholer’s pro bono efforts:
It’s incredibly difficult to get public interest work in this environment. … It’s a good thing from the standpoint that the firm is providing excellent public interest training and mentoring.
Wilner also told us that the public interest associates would still have access to all of the training other first year associates have, and they would be eligible for full firm benefits.
Associates weren’t asked to volunteer to be in the public interest group. Wilner said that the firm had to make difficult decisions about how to split the class. Practice group preference was one factor. But Wilner also said that because the incoming class was strong across the board, some amount of arbitrariness also played a role.
After the jump, incoming associates in the public interest group weigh in.
Don’t you love it when a firm cares so much about associate development that it’s willing to cut associate salaries? That’s what Foley Hoag is doing; the firm announced today that it was slashing salaries, in part to help associate development and recruitment. Here’s a screen shot of the firm wide memo (click to enlarge):
How does cutting salaries help the firm recruit new associates and maintain current associates?
In any event, check out the rest of the memo and tipster reports on how deep the cuts actually are after the jump.
A quick word of thanks to this week’s advertisers on Above the Law:
- American Bar Association
- The Atlantic
- Kinney Recruiting
- Lateral Link
- Soul Calibur 4 PSP
- University of Massachusetts, Amherst, Isenberg School of Management
Way back in the day — I’m thinking circa 1,000 AD — most problems could be solved through an exchange of food. It was a simpler time when disputes were settled without interrogatories, and transgressors made restitution with meat and mead.
With that in mind, I applaud Joliet Judge Robert Livas and his truly old-school sentence. The Chicago Tribune reports:
The local legal community has been abuzz since Associate Judge Robert Livas accepted the Jamaican-style chicken from Darrius Logan this month over an objection from a prosecutor. Logan, 24, pleaded guilty last year to misdemeanor battery and criminal trespass charges after an incident in Joliet.
Rivas now claims he didn’t intend to convert Logan’s community service sentence into a chicken run. But I bet his court staffers are happy with the result.
More details after the jump.
* Former Lawyer of the Day Adam Reposa, who was held in contempt for making the ‘jerk off’ gesture in sight of a judge, is still contemptible. [Texas Lawyer via Blogonaut]
* The first openly gay U.S. attorney gets to work in Washington State. [Associated Press]
* Kwame Kilpatrick is suing the attorney who turned the former Detroit mayor’s sext messages over to the Detroit Free Press. [Detroit News]
* Fresno judge forces nine pot shops to shutter pending the outcome of a zoning law court battle. [Associated Press]
* Former Judge of the Day Robert “Don’t-Park-in-My-Spot” Nalley pleads guilty to taking the air out of a court cleaner’s tire. [Washington Post]
* Are judges cracking down on data breaches? [Storefront Backtalk]
If you’ve been waiting for bar results in the “M” states of Massachusetts and Michigan, your wait is over. We’ve been inundated with emails like this one:
Long time reader, first time caller. Just letting you know that letters for the MA Bar Exam went out today. (I passed!!!)
Congratulations! You have established that you are not an idiot:
Massachusetts bar results were received in the mail today. You are retarded if you failed.
Meanwhile, in the Midwest, Michigan bar results are out:
Michigan July 2009 bar results have been released to examinees. I got mine today. But are there any jobs for those of us who passed?
Good question. Times may be tough for Colorado law grads (even taking into account this correction), but Michigan comes in FIRST when it comes to high unemployment.
Michigan’s unemployment rate may largely reflect the troubles of the car companies. But might the auto industry and the legal industry share some things in common?
Feel free to crow about your bar exam passage, bemoan your bar exam failure, or discuss legal employment conditions in Massachusetts and/or Michigan, in the comments.