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Harry Pregerson Judge Harry Pregerson Above the Law.jpgOr at least a big benchslap upside the head, courtesy of the Supreme Court. Per Orin Kerr:

A lot of people have talked about the Supreme Court’s small docket; Judge Harry Pregerson of the Ninth Circuit is actually doing something about it. He handed down an opinion today in Carrington v. United States that has “Destination: One First Street” written all over it.

Read the rest of Professor Kerr’s devastating critique here. Howard Bashman also doesn’t think highly of the opinion.
Professor Kerr concludes by quoting George Will: “[t]here should be two Supreme Courts, one to reverse the 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals, the other to hear all other cases.” Will’s article was about a “Reinhardt special.” But as Carrington shows, Judge Stephen Reinhardt isn’t racking up reversals all by himself; he gets by with a little help from his friends.
One final note: Carrington gave Judge Consuelo Callahan, the luscious Latina sometimes mentioned as a possible Supreme Court nominee, the opportunity to write an impassioned, high-profile dissent. Judge Callahan should be grateful to Judge Pregerson for giving her the chance to develop conservative street cred. If she gets nominated to the SCOTUS someday, she should thank Judge Pregerson at her investiture.*
(We’d be curious to hear what Professor Doug Berman, sentencing guidelines guru, thinks of Carrington.)
Update: Professor Berman weighs in. Interesting! Are the conservatives now guilty of putting their policy preferences ahead of the letter of the law?
* Best correction ever, from Slate: “Our article originally identified Consuelo Callahan as Consuela Callahan.”
Because, you know, all Latinas in the state of California are named “Consuela.” They’re all maids. And they’re all played by Lupe Ontiveros in the movies.
Carrington v. United States [Volokh Conspiracy]
Carrington v. United States (PDF) [Ninth Circuit via How Appealing]

stack of bills cash money.jpgThis morning’s news is that Shearman & Sterling announced bonuses that match Milbank. We haven’t confirmed this yet, but we have no reason to doubt it, since it’s what everyone else is doing. If you have a memo, please send it our way.
While we were over at Greedy NY, our eye was caught by this plaintive post:

I hope this year of bonus numbers causes a revolt. But it wont. Because, lets face it we are all total dorks. The guys that never got dates, that got beat up in the playground. Thats why we sit here and take this beating and just gripe about it. As much as we hate bankers, they have the chutzpah to step up and do something about being wronged. We go into law because its a “safe” profession, the one where we are “guaranteed” a job.

Seriously, if you went to a top 5 law school as I did, if you compared the student bodies of our law school and the business school, the B-school students were better looking, more confident. The law school students, on the other hand, were total geeks. The partners know this, since they themselves are dorks and losers and make a living out of getting yelled at by 25 year-old bankers and as such there will be no Revenge of the Nerds this year (or any other year). So lets stop talking as if we are hard.

Whether you agree or disagree, it’s one of the most well-written and thoughtful postings we’ve read in a while (although, to be sure, the standards for message-board discourse aren’t set very high). If you have any reactions, please feel free to add them in the comments.
Shearman announced this morning [Infirmation / Greedy NY]
No revenge of the nerds [Infirmation / Greedy NY]

Morning Docket: 12.14.06

* The feds and the ACLU wrangle over a classified document. Is such use of the grand jury subpoena creative, or improper? [New York Times]
* A Swift (& Co.) crackdown: federal raids on meatpacking plants in six states result in over 1,200 arrests on immigration charges. [Associated Press]
* MoveOn and those Swift Boat Veterans get fined. [New York Times]
* “Seventh Circuit reinstates claim asserting that … members of the plaintiff classes have bought products or services from some of the defendants that they would not have bought had the defendants not concealed their involvement in slavery.” [How Appealing]
* Girls Gone Wild guy gets community service for filming underage women. [MSNBC]
* “College Student Gets Mother-in-Law to Co-Sign $10,000 Loan to Buy Apple Computer, Has $7,800 DOI Income When He Repays Only $2,200 After Taking High-Paying Job at Microsoft.” [TaxProf Blog]
* A British police inquiry rejects conspiracy theories concerning the death of Princess Diana, concluding that the 1997 car crash was a “tragic accident.” [Associated Press]
* Does anyone know if “ABV D LAW” is taken? [WSJ Law Blog]

dna lab laboratory Above the Law.jpgThings that make you go hmmm:

DNA testing in the Duke lacrosse rape case found genetic material from several males in the accuser’s body and her underwear — but none from any team member, defense attorneys said in court papers Wednesday.

The papers were filed by attorneys for the three lacrosse players charged, Reade Seligmann, Collin Finnerty and David Evans. They complained that the information about DNA from other men was not disclosed in a report prosecutors provided earlier this year to the defense.

The testing was conducted at a private laboratory for the prosecution.

“This is strong evidence of innocence in a case in which the accuser denied engaging in any sexual activity in the days before the alleged assault, told police she last had consensual sexual intercourse a week before the assault, and claimed that her attackers did not use condoms and ejaculated,” the defense said.

Two reactions:
1. We haven’t read the papers in question, and we don’t know the discovery timetable set in this case. But at first blush, this DNA information sure sounds like evidence that would be subject to disclosure under Brady v. Maryland. When was the prosecution planning on getting around to sharing it?
2. “[G]enetic material from several males,” but none from any of the defendants? ICK. Deeply troubling. And we apologize if you find this gauche or un-PC of us, but we can’t help wondering: Exactly how many is “several”?
Lawyers: DNA Not Linked to Duke Athletes [Associated Press via Instapundit]
Earlier: The Duke Rape Case: The DNA Evidence

stack of bills cash money.jpgAs you can see from the time of our first post of the day, we’ve been in front of our computer for about twelve hours. Our eyes hurt. And we’re hungry.
We need to stand up. Maybe we’ll be really daring and leave our apartment.
Hence this open comment thread. Some of the biggest Biglaws — Cravath, Sullivan & Cromwell, Paul Weiss — have already announced their bonuses. But if Skadden comes along and blows the top off the bonus market while we’re gone, please post it in the comments (along with a link to your source).
We’ll follow up when we return. Thanks.
P.S. We realize this is unlikely. First, Skadden will probably do what everybody else has done, and match the market bonuses (as set last week by Milbank). Second, based on the buzz over at Greedy NY, it seems that a Skadden announcement will probably come tomorrow.
Earlier: Prior ATL coverage of bonuses (scroll down)

Hole Celebrity Skin Above the Law.gifWe’ve been so obsessed with law firm bonus developments that we missed the happy news earlier this week about Courtney Love, one of our most favorite celebrities.
At long last, Love’s legal troubles are behind her. From the music news website liveDaily:

A judge terminated Courtney Love’s probation and dismissed three misdemeanor charges against the singer Monday (12/11), ruling that Love had successfully battled her substance-abuse problems.

Love, 42, sobbed as Los Angeles Superior Court judge Rand Rubin pronounced the ruling that effectively wiped her legal slate clean, according to an Associated Press report.

“Thank you for not taking me into custody,” Love reportedly said in court. “Thank you for giving me an opportunity. You’ve been a good, fair judge. Sorry for crying.”

After the hearing, her lawyer, Howard Weitzman, made this statement:

“Courtney stepped up to the plate, turned her life around and is on the road to releasing her new record and hopefully getting hired to act in films. I’m happy I could help.”

Right now we’re feeling all warm and fuzzy inside. Wonderful news, just in time for the holidays. Congratulations to both Courtney Love, for getting her life and career back on track, and Howard Weitzman, for obtaining such an excellent result for his client.
(Will Weitzman be able to do the same for Nicole Richie? We shall see…)
P.S. We’re not being saracastic in describing Love as one of our favorite celebrities. Her tabloid exploits have led people to overlook the fact that she’s a phenomenally talented singer and actress. Just listen to Celebrity Skin, one of our favorite albums, and Live Through This, which Rolling Stone and Time have both declared to be one of the greatest albums ever (and correctly so).
And don’t forget Love’s remarkable star turn as Althea Flynt in The People vs. Larry Flynt (for which she was nominated for a Golden Globe). It would be great to see her return to acting.
Judge ends Courtney Love’s probation, charges dropped [liveDaily]
Courtney Gets a “Hole” Lotta Love in Court [TMZ.com]

Non-Sequiturs: 12.13.06

* This is beautiful and noble. Painting with your butt — or, rather, using your butt as a type of giant rubber stamp — not so much. [Richmond Times Dispatch]
* Not all law students are holed up in the library 24/7, but it’s clear that cramming has taken a lot out of Legal Bachelor’s game. [Chicks Dig Law Students]
* Hmmm. I actually agree with Scalia here. (Well, if you are the inspiration for a Christmas season movie starring Will Smith, you could raise a kid on nothing but love and hope.) [Crime & Federalism]
* Your words-of-the-day: racewalker, Hooman, and the universal favorite, law school gunner. And to think I’ve been out of law school for only a few years. [Urban Dictionary]
* We should remind Evel Knievel that Jesus didn’t sue. And while we’re on the subject, why do I know who Evel Knievel is? [Likelihood of Confusion]

stack of bills cash money.jpgThe latest news is that Morrison & Foerster’s New York office has matched the market bonuses. We’ve checked with our MoFo sources, and this is accurate.
So consider it CONFIRMED. Specific numbers, after the jump.
Earlier today, a reader made this comment:

“Why don’t you just call up all the firms now, instead of waiting for the rumors to appear one by one, so we can get this over with?”

Not a bad idea, given the “Chinese water torture” aspect to tracking bonuses. The only rub is that not all firms have necessarily decided on what they’ll be paying — at least in theory. Rumor is that the Cravath memo wasn’t issued until after the Cravath partnership met. So it’s (theoretically) possible that some firm might pay out above-market bonuses.
But as a practical matter, yes, it’s true: Everybody is probably just going to match market.
In light of all the parallel conduct, maybe there’s an antitrust issue here. But whether you can even get discovery on it depends upon the ruling in Bell Atlantic v. Twombly, currently pending in the Supreme Court.
Is “Associate Bonus Watch” less suspenseful than a Hitchcock film? Yes. Is the bonus-tracking game effectively over? Pretty much.
But ABW has been great for our traffic. And who knows, maybe there will be a surprise or two. So we’ll keep following the “news,” even if it consists of every other firm falling into line, until all the top Biglaw shops have announced.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Associate Bonus Watch: The Fat Lady Is Losing Her Voice”

Golden Gate Bridge San Francisco Eumi Choi Eumi Choi Above the Law.jpgWe enjoy reading your comments. Well, some of them. See, e.g., here, here, and here.
But some we find rather mystifying. Like this comment on How Yummy Is Eumi?, our profile of high-powered federal prosecutor Eumi Choi, First Assistant U.S. Attorney for the Northern District of California (San Francisco).
Commenter “Barbara” wrote:

This post, like the SF Weekly article it references, was planted by a group of disgruntled (and racist) former and current AUSAs who constitute the best-coordinated insurgency outside of Iraq. They are a group of uppity Caucasians hell-bent on controlling the U.S. Attorney’s Office. They hate Eumi because she is Asian — and ergo, is not one of them.

Note how this posting focuses on Eumi’s race. Many of the insurgents’ private talk about Eumi is also borderline racist — e.g., referring her as “Dragon Lady.” Interestingly, these insurgent AUSAs who now whine about having to “follow directions” were themselves the most autocratic dictators around during the Shapiro/Mueller administration, when THEY were in power.

Even more interesting is how very little anyone discusses the impoverished morals of the insurgent AUSAs. Four of them had affairs with other AUSAs while married to other people. One of the harshest critics of Eumi and Kevin Ryan left his pregnant wife for another AUSA. Everyone is so fascinated by the fact of a powerful Asian female being under attack that nobody — least of all the legal press, which is incapable of anything other than acting as a mouthpiece for the disgruntled — has paid any heed to the fact that the Caucasian stonethrowers are themselves living in brittle glass houses.

We don’t understand this commenter’s ire towards our post. We praised Eumi Choi as a “tough, smart, no-nonsense” prosecutor, as well as a “strong Asian woman.” We also described her as “fabulous” and “yummy.” What part of that was unclear?
(Also, for the record, we’re Asian ourselves — and were raised by a mom who’s a lot like Eumi Choi. So we obviously have no problems with powerful Asian females or Asian lawyers in positions of power.)
Despite our issues with this comment, we did enjoy the dirt it dished out — especially the allegations of extramarital affairs galore. The U.S.A.O. for the N.D. Cal. sounds as incestuous, fractious, and trashily dysfunctional as “Melrose Place.”
If you have more juicy gossip about the U.S. Attorney’s Office in San Francisco — concerning Eumi Choi, her adversaries, or the battles going on between them — please do share with us.
(Hint to people who want to buy us a Christmas gift: the first season of “Melrose Place” is now out on DVD.)
Earlier: How Yummy Is Eumi?

musical chairs 2 Above the Law legal blog above the law legal tabloid above the law legal gossip site.GIFIt has been a while since our last round-up of notable moves within the legal profession. So there’s a lot to report today:
Law Firm to… Prison?
* Former Milberg Weiss name partner Steven Schulman resigned from the firm to pursue “new ventures.” The most important of these “ventures” will surely be fighting federal charges of making illegal payments to plaintiffs in past cases.
Law Firms to In-House:
* Securities lawyer Stephen Cutler is leaving his partnership at WilmerHale to become general counsel of J.P. Morgan Chase & Co., the banking giant. From a tipster who works in securities law: “This is a big deal.”
Colleagues of Cutler described the JP Morgan gig to the WSJ Law Blog as a “once-in-a-lifetime” opportunity. Translation: Who wouldn’t want to make mid- instead of low-seven-figures?
* Another WilmerHale departure: J. Kevin McCarthy is taking over as top lawyer of the Cowen Group, an investment bank.
Government to Private Sector:
* Former New Jersey Chief Justice Deborah Poritz joins the Princeton office of Drinker Biddle & Reath, as of counsel. She stepped down from the New Jersey Supreme Court in October, after reaching the mandatory retirement age.
Government Promotion:
* David Nocenti, current counsel to New York Attorney General Eliot Spitzer, will become counsel to the governor effective January 1.
Academia-Biglaw Alliance:
* Harvard Law School Professor Laurence Tribe, the renowned constitutional scholar and SCOTUS litigator, is entering into a consulting arrangement with Akin Gump.
Akin Gump is developing a Supreme Court practice. Earlier this year, they added young SCOTUS superstar Tom Goldstein to their line-up.
Lateral Moves:
* Securities-enforcement lawyer Chuck Davidow, to Paul Weiss (DC), from WilmerHale.
Another loss for WilmerHale — on top of the previously reported departure of Paul Eckert for the White House Counsel’s Office.
Why are so many partners leaving WilmerHale? A Hillary Clinton administration is still two years away.
* IP lawyer Joseph Gioconda, to DLA Piper (New York), from Kirkland & Ellis.
* Corporate lawyer Eric Lerner, to Kramer Levin, from Katten Muchin Rosenman.
* Tax lawyer Thomas Giegerich, to McDermott Will & Emery (NY), from Dewey Ballantine (about to merge with Orrick to form Dewy Orifice).
New Partners:
* Bryan Cave: Eleven new partners. Names here.
Due to the sheer number of links today, we’ve placed them after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Musical Chairs: 12.13.06″

Marissa Cooper Alex The OC girl girls lesbian kiss.jpgNo, we’re not talking about that time on “The OC” when Marissa Cooper (Mischa Barton) shared a girl-on-girl kiss with Alex (Olivia Wilde). Rather, we’re referring to a civil rights case currently pending before Judge James Selna, in the Central District of California.
From the L.A. Times (via How Appealing):

Two high schoolers are caught kissing on campus.

Ordinarily, such an incident would garner little attention. But for Charlene Nguon, a smattering of kisses and hugs stolen after school and in between classes led to detention, suspensions, a transfer and a lawsuit.

The reason? That’s what a federal judge in Santa Ana will soon decide.

Nguon says it’s because she was kissing a girl. Ben Wolf, who was then principal of Garden Grove’s Santiago High School, says that’s not the case at all. He insists the problem was that, regardless of whether it was a girl or boy, Nguon continued the kissing despite repeated warnings to knock it off.

And that’s just the tip of this salaciously sapphic iceberg.
Check out the rest, after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Lawsuit of the Day: Lesbians in the OC”

R Ted Cruz Above the Law.jpgMany of you, especially those of you about to deposit Biglaw bonus checks, will update your résumés at the start of the new year. It’s a common time to jump to a new job, or to start looking for one. In the first few weeks of 2007, expect departure memos to go around like the flu.
But what do you want to do next? Fellow law geeks, your attention please. The man with good taste in chocolate has two positions open in Texas’s Office of the Solicitor General (OSG).
OSG regularly handles high-profile, politically sensitive cases in the U.S. Supreme Court. Most recently, it successfully defended the Texas redistricting plan, defended the Ten Commandments monument on the Texas capitol grounds, and resisted efforts by the International Court of Justice to order reconsideration of U.S. death penalty jurisprudence.
It also regularly participates as amicus in cases in which the State has an interest. Since 2003, OSG has filed over 50 Supreme Court briefs. And, for three years running now, in 2003, 2004, and 2005, the Texas SG’s office has won the National Association of Attorneys General (NAAG) award for Best Supreme Court Brief.
More details about this exciting opportunity, after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Ted Cruz Is Looking for a Few Good… Appellate Lawyers”

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