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Homer Simpson Doh Above the Law AboveTheLaw blog.jpgEarlier this week, we created an open thread for the sharing of on-campus interview screw-ups. We then picked out a few favorite tales from the thread, and asked you to vote for the best (or worst?) of the bunch.
Here are the results:
interview idiocy poll results.jpg
You can read the winning story by clicking here.
Many of you seemed to enjoy the horror stories — and they’re informative, too, providing lessons about behavior to avoid. But don’t put too much weight on them. As one commenter observes:

[The problem with these stories] is that they presume that the stupid act in question was the sole reason the person didn’t get a callback. Not everybody at OCI gets callbacks. Plenty of people who don’t do one stupid thing in an interview don’t get callbacks. I suspect that these stories of stupidity are actually rationalizations for rejection.

See also this comment:

People who think they got rejected because they accidentally dropped a business card on their way out are deluding themselves. They tell themselves these bullshit tales of woe because if you think you got dinged because you dropped a business card, then next time you can tuck it into your portfolio tighter. And then you’ll SURELY get the offer! But the truth – that you are getting rejected because you are a mediocre student at a [mediocre] law school who should have tried to get a job at a mutual fund instead of spending $200,000 to learn about community property – that’s a lot harder to fix.

Loyola 2L, we missed you.
So, readers, what do you think? Are interview bloopers irrelevant because there may be other, less conspicuous reasons for not getting a callback or offer (e.g., you just didn’t stand out)? Or are they irrelevant because the hiring process is so “paper driven,” i.e., all about your transcript, resume, and law school ranking?
Earlier: OCI Bloopers By Students: Selected Stories (and a Poll)
OCI Bloopers By Students: Share Your Horror Stories

Thelen LLP new logo.jpgLoeb & Loeb announced the addition of two new partners to their New York office, Kenneth A. Adler and Steve A. Semerdjian. Both partners are Thelen refugees.
As you may have heard, Thelen is limping. Not Lehman Brothers limping (Dealbreaker has the latest on Lehman’s desperation). But Thelen clearly needs something positive to happen for them.
We’ll get back to piling on in the near future, but as Adler and Semerdjian cruise away in their lifeboat, we’re forced to wonder how much partner defections actually mean to working associates.
Not that Thelen is hiring anybody, but if they were would you avoid Thelen because Adler and Semerdjian left the firm? Conversely, are there people out there who are thinking “I wasn’t going to take that call-back with Loeb, but now that Adler and Semerdjian are there, sign me up baby!”
loeb loeb.gifPartner defections mean a lot to partners. But how much of that rain really trickles down to the associate level? Thelen’s troubles were obvious long before partners started floating away. Somehow we can’t see Loeb associates having a truck party just because profits per partner might go up thanks to the new acquisitions.
We’ll see when the bonuses come out if Loeb’s additions are anything more than Thelen’s subtractions.
Earlier: Prior ATL coverage of Thelen

The clash of cougars and pigs in a club in southern California has led to a $1 million lawsuit against G4, a “male-interest” cable station. Three women (who do not divulge their ages in the complaint) claim G4 Media filmed them, without their consent, for a show segment called “The Great Cougar Hunt.” The show defines “cougars” as “sexually cunning 35+ females on the hunt for a much younger energetic male.”
From Courthouse News Service:

Christine Torres and Charnette Hildreth say they were celebrating Tammi Tary’s birthday at the Chapter Eight dance club when an employee of defendant G4 Media asked if he could videotape them. The women say they refused…
Eight months later, the women say, they discovered “The Great Cougar Hunt” on G4’s cable station. The video portrayed their birthday party as a group of “older women” looking for younger men at a “world famous cougar hot spot.”
According to the complaint, the video describes “cougars” as the “easiest, most ravenous” prey for younger men.
The women say they were “not attempting to meet or ‘hunt’ younger men.” They say they do not even date younger men.

Spike TV has the offending clip here:

We think the XY contingent may want to consider filing a class action suit against the show for defamation of the male gender. The jerky show hosts are not likely to inspire much sympathy from a judge and jury… unless they’re all taken from the cast of Swingers.
‘We’re Not Cougars,’ Women Say in TV Suit [Courthouse News Service]
The Great Cougar Hunt [Spike]


stripper pole justice.JPG In some strip clubs down-under, you can get a lot more than you pay for.

A bucks night reveler told police he had lost some of his manhood after a female stripper allegedly raped him with a sex toy. … The best man told police he felt violated when stripper Linda Naggs rode him like a horse and penetrated him with a dildo at the party in September last year, the Melbourne Magistrates Court heard on Tuesday.

But the thing is that the “best man” and his friends were being total jerks. I’m not saying he “deserved” it, but it couldn’t have happened to a better guy.
There are counter allegations that the “victim” was drunk and abusive, and coked out of his mind. After the alleged sodomy, the men allegedly took the stripper out back and beat her up.
In short, the guys were massive tools. One almost hopes that the offending sex toy was dipped in some sort of burning napalm substance before it was used.
The stripper claims she is not guilty. She told the police:

[S]he did not believe there was penetration. But she said the man had thrust back, causing her to fall to the ground.

That’s right, Mr. Stripper-beater thrust back. I don’t know about any of you, but the last time I received a surprise colonoscopy, I moved forward.
The alleged victim said:

I feel that my manhood has dropped a bit.

Sorry mate, but your manhood “dropped” the moment you thought it was cool to taunt, berate, and then assault a stripper, undoubtedly ruining your best friend’s bachelor party. The homophobic overreaction simply proves the point.
Bucks party stripper to face trial [National Nine News]

ice cube nwa police juries.JPGO.J. Simpson is set to stand trial, but this time the jury is all white (“So it’s all right,” says Chris Rock).
But let’s dig beyond identity politics for a moment.
Over at Deliberations they’ve posted a study that looks at jury issues based on jurisdiction, instead of ethnic origin. The study compares juries from urban districts to suburban ones. One can argue that splitting jury pools in this way is “code” for making a black-white distinction, but once the jurisdiction is picked it becomes harder to voir dire yourself into a conviction/acquittal.
The study finds urban juries to be “softer” on crime than suburban juries. D’uh. What is interesting is why there is this split.
Apparently, urban juries don’t trust the police, while suburban juries do.
Isn’t this a point that makes a lot of sense? Regardless of your race, if you live in a big city most of your interaction with the police involves them hassling you, your friends, and your rights. A tourist breathes a sigh of relief when they are walking down a dark alley and a patrol car rolls by. A city dweller avoids the stupid alley altogether, unless they are doing something that requires the privacy of dark, dank urban escapes.
Tempting fate after the break.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading ““F(*& The Po-lice” — NWA”

Sarah Palin Alaska Governor Sarah Palin hottie.jpg* New York criminal defense lawyer Robert Simels has been spending too much time with the bad guys. He was arrested yesterday for trying to “eliminate and neutralize witnesses” in a drug-trafficking case. [Bloomberg]
* Judge sides with the Federal Election Commission, putting the muzzle on The Real Truth About Obama. [Associated Press]
* The jury is seated in O.J. Simpson’s kidnapping and robbery trial. Opening arguments start Monday. We wonder if his attorneys are feeling pressure to come up with something as snappy as the “if the glove don’t fit…” line. [CNN]
* A Florida attorney’s tale of lawyerly ethics, attorney-client privilege, and a hidden body. [St. Petersburg Times]
* Sarah Palin’s first big interview. [New York Times]

Yammer twitter law firms new bully toy.pngJust to be clear, I substantially agree with Futurelawyer on the abject horror of twittering. If God wanted people to have Twitter pages he wouldn’t have made sphincters; there are some things that should be kept inside until the appropriate time.
Given that, it is disturbing that Yammer took home the top prize at TechCrunch50. Yammer brings Twitter to internal corporate communications. TechCrunch claims that 10,000 people and 2,000 organizations signed up for the service Monday, the day it launched.
Firms already have associates on the short electronic leash known as the BlackBerry. Many firms internally IM. What possible good could come from bringing this Yammer thing into the workplace?
From Yammer’s website:

Yammer is a tool for making companies and organizations more productive through the exchange of short frequent answers to one simple question: “What are you working on?”

As employees answer that question, a feed is created in one central location enabling co-workers to discuss ideas, post news, ask questions, and share links and other information. Yammer also serves as a company directory in which every employee has a profile and as a knowledge base where past conversations can be easily accessed and referenced.

Excuse me while I go to the bathroom, get a coke from the fridge, take a drag, stare longingly out of the window, and go back to blogging after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Yammer Wants To Bring Twitter To Your Firm”

Kanye west smashes stomps.JPG* Trial lawyers think the discovery process is broken. Don’t worry first year associates, nobody listens to silly trial lawyers. [BLT: Blog of the Legal Times]
* Some people like to use plagiarism detection software to figure out which briefs SCOTUS justices find persuasive. We’d like to use it to make fun of lazy SCOTUS clerks. [The Conglomerate via SCOTUSblog]
* This story includes four words that should never be in the same sentence. I’ll jumble them up because I don’t want to flippantly scar people for life: home, tape, sex, nursing. [How Appealing]
* Not everybody can go to a top 50 law school. Find out which schools outside of the top 50 have the most “productive” faculty. [Brian Leiter's Law School Reports]
* Anger Management. Look into it, Kayne West. [Gawker]

DLA Piper logo Above the Law blog.jpgWe received some chatter this week about DLA Piper shortening their summer program. Interviewees on the east-coast have been told that the program would be only 10 weeks long, as opposed to the 11 or 12 weeks they were expecting.
DLA Piper spokesperson Jason Costa assured us that scaling back was not a reaction to the downturn in the economy:

2/3rds of our summer programs were already ten weeks long. Some were a little bit longer and some were a little bit shorter. About a year ago we decided we were going to standardize most of our summer programs to a ten week term, which impacted a couple of offices on the east coast. The result is that all of the summer programs are going to be over by early August.

Costa went on to say that the change was made to so they could be finished with their summer program by the time OCI starts in late August.
More about the 2009 summer class after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “DLA Piper: Summer Program to Run 10 Weeks Long For All Offices”

sept11 013.jpgWarning: This post strays from the snarky and strictly legal. The seventh anniversary of September 11 begs for a bit of solemnity after all. We were on the scene of the tribute today in Zuccotti Park in downtown Manhattan, next to the World Trade Center site.
Among those gathered in the park was Cheryl Shames of Long Island. Her brother, Andrew Zucker, then 27, was one of the five lawyers from Harris Beach who died in the collapse of the second tower on September 11, 2001.
Zucker worked as a volunteer fireman before going to Cardozo Law School. After a job as an assistant district attorney in the Bronx, he joined Harris Beach. He had started there August 2001.
According to his sister, Harris Beach hired a private investigator to evaluate the office’s response to the emergency. The investigator determined that Zucker’s “fireman instincts” helped save the lives of the seven Harris Beachers who managed to escape.
Just a little remembrance. We’ll return to the snark shortly.

champagne glasses small.jpgAfter two weeks of political chatter over John McCain’s vice-presidential pick, one burning question remains: Will Bristol Palin’s wedding announcement run in the New York Times? If it does, dear readers, it may mark the first time a self-described “f–kin’ redneck” appears in that space. Be assured that LEWW, after stretching to find a legal angle, will cover it with the breathless snark you demand.
As is usually the case, all three of our weddings this week were officiated by Rabbis. So you may safely assume that there are no rednecks, and no pregnant brides. Just silky smooth prestige. Here are the finalists:

1.
Sara Aronchick and Scott Solow

2. Betty Luther and Benjamin Siracusa
3. Annie Kaufman and Tad Fallows

More about these couples, after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Legal Eagle Wedding Watch 8.31: Enchan-Tad”

bc lsa cruise drinking.jpgTomorrow, the law students association at Boston College Law School will host its annual Boston Harbor boat cruise. Most law schools in the greater Boston area do some version of this. I’ve been on many, though I remember none.
But I guess it’s exactly that kind of drunk boat behavior that the BC cruise team are sick of. A tipster sent along sternly worded email in advance of tomorrow night’s festivities:

Unfortunately, over the past several years, we have had some troubling incidents on the boat cruise that have marred this event. These incidents were all caused by excessive alcohol consumption.

Is there any point to being on a boat in the middle of Boston Harbor unless you intend to consume alcohol excessively? It’s not like you can fish, swim, or gamble. What else are you supposed to do?
The email goes on to list specific incidents that have “marred” the boat cruise in the past:

One year, a law student was detained and arrested by the State Police while trying to board the boat while intoxicated. A few years ago, the boat was forced to return to port shortly after leaving dock because of a seriously intoxicated student on the cruise. Last year, there was a fight between two law students and one sustained a serious, and possibly permanent, injury.

As our tipster aptly put it, “I’m still trying to figure out if this was meant as a warning or an advertisement.”
Tickets are still available!
The full email is reprinted after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Stop Screwin’ Around. You Guys Screw Around Too Much”

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