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Monopoly Go Directly To Jail Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgFrom The BLT, shortly before 2:00 p.m.:

From Emma Schwartz, inside the courtroom:

Scooter Libby’s stable of legal thoroughbreds failed him. Moments ago Judge Reggie Walton ruled that Libby does not get bail pending appeal. It’s jail time.

Update / clarification: Libby wasn’t taken into custody today. It will take at least six to eight weeks for the Bureau of Prisons to determine where Libby will be imprisoned and to set a reporting date for him to show up to prison.
No. Bail. [The BLT: The Blog of the Legal Times]
Judge Won’t Delay Libby Prison Term [Associated Press via Washington Post]

Eyes on the Prize Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgWouldn’t it be nice if a kind reader were to nominate Above the Law in this contest?
We realize ATL isn’t always a laugh riot. But c’mon, folks — it’s a competition for most amusing LEGAL BLOG.
(We’re reminded of Justice Breyer’s recent quip, in which he compared being the funniest Supreme Court justice to being the tallest dwarf.)
Top 10 Funniest Law Blogs [Legal Antics]

If you’ve been feeling bad for Jin Nam and Soo Chung, the dry cleaners sued by crazy-ass pseudo-judge ALJ Roy Pearson for $54 million — over a pair of pants — now you can help:
Custom Cleaners Defense Fund Soo Chung Jin Nam Chung Chungs Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.JPG
As for what’s going on in the case, Marc Fisher has this update in today’s Washington Post. The trial is over; expect a ruling from Judge Judith Bartnoff sometime next week.
Wearing Down the Judicial System With a Pair of Pants [Washington Post]
Custom Cleaners Defense Fund [official website]

popcorn microwave popcorn Seattle Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgAt our former law firm, the making of microwave popcorn was strictly prohibited. Marty Lipton didn’t like the hallways smelling like a movie theater. As we previously observed, “When you’re trying to close a billion-dollar deal, a sudden hankering for a 32-ounce Coke can be very distracting.”
So… Is the City of Seattle about to follow suit? Details here.
City of Seattle may ban microwave popcorn [ via Drudge Report]
Earlier: Fun With Internal Memos: Submissions, Please

King Spalding LLP logo Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgFirst, King & Spalding is now on the $160K salary scale in Washington, DC. We hear that the associates back in Atlanta, who have not seen any raise action, aren’t happy campers. Memo after the jump.
Second, with respect to the rumor that Hogan & Hartson has raised salaries for its lower-hours track, we’d appreciate it if someone would send us confirmation and/or a memo. Thanks.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Nationwide Pay Raise Watch: Two D.C. Developments”

We’re nearing the end of graduation season. Sadly, we received hardly any responses to our request for examples of odious graduation gifts. This was the best one:

Worst graduation gift ever: My dad asking me why I only came second in my class and not first. And then no gifts!

If that’s not a recipe for several years of therapy, we don’t know what is.
Nina Totenberg NPR Georgetown Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgDue to the lack of submissions, we have picked out our own worst graduation gift: Nina Totenberg as your graduation speaker.
Because Nina Totenberg, the distinguished legal affairs reporter for NPR, is one of the country’s most celebrated journalists, one would expect graduates — especially law school graduates — to appreciate her as a speaker. But La Totenberg didn’t win many fans with her recent Georgetown commencement address.
Here’s a less-than-favorable review of her speech, from a 2007 graduate of Georgetown University Law Center:

I worked very hard, for an extended period of time, to graduate from law school. For better or worse, it represents one of the great achievements I will have in life. And her speech seemed as if she wrote it on the cab ride over from NPR.

I’m disappointed that Totenberg chose to be so lighthearted during what I feel is, for lack of a better word, a “solemn” occasion. It was so lighthearted that it wasn’t even cogent! Ask me how I really feel, right?

I have heard nothing but negative reviews from [my classmates]….

(If you’d like to check it out for yourself, click here to access a webcast. Enjoy.)
Update: This commenter makes a good point. We’ve heard a number of tales about Nina Totenberg’s diva-licious behavior — and we’d love to hear more. Please send them to us by email, and perhaps we’ll do a more detailed write-up on her. Thanks.
2007 Georgetown Law Center Commencement Ceremony [Georgetown University Law Center (webcast)]
Nina Totenberg bio [National Public Radio]
Earlier: Worst Graduation Gifts: Submissions, Please

upper midwest mid west Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgWe welcome your suggestions of legal markets to cover in our grand tour of these here United States. We won’t necessarily adopt them (and we can’t cover every single market in the entire country). But we do appreciate your recommendations, which we often follow.
A recent commenter had this idea:

How ’bout the upper midwest in one shot (Milwaukee, Minneapolis, Detroit and maybe Cleveland)?

We previously covered Cleveland as part of our Ohio post. But we are happy to devote today’s post to the Upper Midwest.
How does one define the Upper Midwest? Apparently there’s some disagreement. Per Wikipedia:

The Upper Midwest is a region of the United States with no universally agreed-upon boundary, but it almost always lies within the US Census Bureau’s definition of the Midwest and includes the states of Minnesota and Wisconsin, as well as at least the Upper Peninsula of Michigan.

The Upper Midwest often includes the rest of Michigan, Iowa, Indiana, Illinois, and sometimes extends further southwest to include Missouri, east to Ohio, and sometimes west to North Dakota and South Dakota, and the parts of Montana east of the Rockies.

We’ll adopt the definition that includes Minnesota, Wisconsin, Michigan, Iowa, Indiana, and Illinois. This includes the cities of Milwaukee, Minneapolis, Detroit, and Indianapolis (but not Chicago, which we cover extensively as part of our national coverage).
With this definition in mind, please discuss associate compensation at Upper Midwest law firms in the comments. Thanks.
Upper Midwest [Wikipedia]
Related: Open threads focused on Denver, Hartford, Philadelphia, Seattle, New Jersey, Phoenix, Atlanta, Charlotte, Ohio, Miami.

* It’s hard out here for a suburban, country club dwelling, former porn star pimp. [Atlanta Journal-Constitution]
* And by “reshape” we mean “slowly eliminate altogether.” [New York Times]
* House closes VT gun background check loophole. [Jurist]
* Only difference is, once I get my pants on, I make gold records! [CNN]
* It’s also hard out here for a disabled, middle-aged, drug-dealing pimp. [Atlanta Journal-Constitution]

Fried Frank Harris Shriver Jacobson LLP Abovethelaw Above the Law blog.jpgHey everyone, remember those things called clerkship bonuses? After a long period of radio silence — the most recent news was from before Memorial Day — we have more information to share.
We just got off the phone with a Fried Frank spokesperson, who informed us as follows:

1. The firm has raised its clerkship bonus to $50,000.

2. This bonus doesn’t change depending upon whether you have one or two years of clerkship experience. (Most of the firm’s clerks join the firm from one-year clerkships.)

Are you aware of any recent clerkship bonus announcements that we haven’t mentioned in these pages? If so, please email us (subject line: “Clerkship Bonus”). Thanks.

wedding cake marriage Abovethelaw Above the Law legal blog.jpg* ATL readers, meet Modern Bride of the Year, future defender of battered women. [Modern Bride; lots of "In Defense of"s in Slate's Wedding Report] [FN1]
* I hate to repeat myself and every other local politician, but what do you expect from New York City public school teachers? (I mean, what does it say when an atheist donates millions to help the needy send their kids to parochial schools?) [CBS News]
* Even highly evolved, quietly progressive Sweden is not immune to the realities of displacement. [New York Times]
* Feel free to direct your anger at me, but foie gras is a traditional part of my family’s Christmas spread. I blame over- and mass-production for the spectacular extent of bad press. How would you feel if turkey were outlawed? And what happened to the veal controversy? I’m glad I don’t live in Chicago. [Fox News]
* Paris has famously vowed not to act stupid anymore, but she should put her money where her mouth is. Sadly, Tehran will probably nix the idea of The Simple Life: Behind the Burqa. [CNN]
[FN1] Brides and grooms-to-be, please forgive me for this gratuitous laugh at your expense. But I can’t help myself, and somehow I am comforted that such sentiment does not spring from bitterness or a Gawker-esque superiority/inferiority complex. I’m just in a state of utter disbelief that earnestness seems genetically intertwined with blondeness and nasality.

Aaron Charney 2 headshot Aaron B Charney Aaron Brett CharneyRoughly three weeks have passed since the last substantive development in Aaron Charney v. Sullivan & Cromwell. What the heck is going on right now?
Sadly, not much. Lavi Soloway brings us this update.
(Normally we’d be quite excited about the dirt that can be expected to surface during the discovery process. But we fear the parties will be more discreet than we might like.)
Aaron Charney v Sullivan & Cromwell: Parties Move on to Discovery Phase [Lavi Soloway]
Earlier: Prior ATL coverage of Charney v. Sullivan & Cromwell (scroll down)

AutoAdmit xoxohth Anthony Ciolli Above the Law blog.JPGThe blogosphere is ablaze with discussion of the AutoAdmit lawsuit. We collect and summarize the commentary in this linkwrap.
(We read all the blogs, so you don’t have to! You can thank us later.)
1. Students File Suit Against Ex-AutoAdmit Director, Others [WSJ Law Blog]
If you haven’t done so already, read this post first. It contains the most detailed factual background about the case. You can also access the Complaint itself by clicking here (PDF).
2. Yale law students sue over “the scummiest kind of sexually offensive tripe” at AutoAdmit [Althouse]
Professor Ann Althouse has her doubts about this lawsuit:

So this is the 21st century? Where courts award punitive damages for offensive words and pictures? Isn’t “the scummiest kind of sexually offensive tripe” exactly what we always used to say people had to put up with in a free country? Man, that was so 20th century!

3. Suing Autodmit [Instapundit]
Professor Glenn Reynolds — who kindly links to our post, by the way — largely agrees with Professor Althouse. He sarcastically observes: “Stuff that offends dumb hicks in the heartland is constitutionally protected. Stuff that offends Yale Law Students must be stamped out!”
More links, after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “More on the AutoAdmit Lawsuit: An Update on Doe v. Ciolli”

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