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associate bonus watch 2007 law firm Above the Law blog.jpgKIRKLAND & ELLIS LLP
M E M O R A N D U M
TO: Firmwide Associates
cc: Firmwide Partners
FROM: Associate & NSP Compensation Committee
RE: Year-End Bonuses
______________________________________________________________________
Several New York-based firms recently announced their 2007 bonuses. Please be aware that we intend to continue our practice of paying year-end bonuses in December. As in the past, we expect that those bonuses will be competitive in each of the markets in which we are located, and that they will continue to reflect our historical, meritocratic approach. Thank you for your continued hard work and dedication.

sex toy cornucopia pornucopia Above the Law blog.jpgYou can find the weirdest s**t on Craigslist:

I’m creating a proposal for a downtown performance art show based on US sex laws – the quirkier the better. There are many lists online of these laws, but it’s really hard to find the actual statute or case number. In some cases, they either don’t exist or are changed to sound funny but the actual law is not so strange. Like, if its illegal to bring an animal into a public space, you could say that porcupines are not allowed at the opera but then neither is a dog. So much for your funny porcupine law.

The strength of the show is based on the truth – like the real Texas law where having 7 or more sex toys in your possession is “intent to distribute”. I’m looking to see if some defunct laws ever existed – like the supposed Florida law that banned unmarried women from parachuting on Sundays.

If you even understand what I’m going for and have access to a law library (online or brick&mortar), please contact me.

Cheers,
Gabrielle

Our tipster writes: “I’d take it on myself, but I’m not sure how I’d bill it. I know Loyola 2L is pretty hard up; perhaps he could use the extra bucks. Plus, something tells me Gabrielle’s gotta be hot (Roissy would surely agree).”
Gabrielle: you might want to drop Howard Bashman a line. He is a recognized authority on sex toys (as a legal if not practical matter).
Update: A diligent associate at a bonus-bestowing firm recommends A Guide to America’s Sex Laws, by no less an authority than the eminent Judge Richard Posner.
But this sex law compendium might come with a big red flag over it, in the wake of Lawrence v. Texas. The diligent associate points out: “Note that it’s out of date, coming as it did in the Bowers era.”
RESEARCH – Strange Laws for Performance Piece (Lower East Side) [Craigslist]

associate bonus watch 2007 law firm Above the Law blog.jpgAll the beautiful people over at Davis Polk can still afford their gym memberships and spa treatments. DPW just matched market in terms of bonuses.
Davis is paying the standard year-end bonuses, topping out at $65K, and special bonuses, to be paid on November 26. Bonuses for counsel will be determined individually.
Memo after the jump.
Earlier: Associate Bonus Watch 2007 archives (scroll down)

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Associate Bonus Watch: Davis Polk Matches”

Jan Crawford Greenburg 3.jpgOne of our favorite Supreme Court reporters, the fabulous Jan Crawford Greenburg, gave a speech at Harvard Law School today. But she didn’t tarry in Cambridge:

Not sure what is going on, but JCG just finished giving a speech at HLS and said that:

a) She was turning around to go back to Washington immediately (this was not her original plan) and that the folks in DC had actually wanted her to turn around and catch the next shuttle back right away this morning after she landed.

b) We should be sure to watch the news tonight.

Not sure if there is anything to this, but checking Drudge and everything else there don’t seem to be any legal headlines going on. So the whole thing just seemed sort of weird.

Sure, I guess a few hundred bucks is nothing to ABC News, but the whole thing just seemed sort of odd. So I thought I’d throw it your way in case there were any other rumors flying about.

Correction / Update: We’ve been advised that the foregoing information actually came from the remarks introducing Jan Crawford Greenburg, not from the speech of JCG herself, and was mentioned only by way of explaining why the event was being cut somewhat short (with a planned lunch cancelled).
Has anyone heard anything? Nothing over at JCG’s blog, Legalities, hints at the reason for her rapid return to Washington.
Might Jan Crawford Greenburg’s hasty retreat back to DC be related to the embattled nomination of Michael Mukasey as Attorney General? Maybe Mukasey will give her an exclusive interview, in which he will declare waterboarding “not cool”?
Your speculation, informed or otherwise, is welcome in the comments.
P.S. On the subject of Mukasey and waterboarding, see this editorial cartoon.
Mukasey Mulls Waterboarding [The Illustrated Daily Scribble]
Bush Moves to Save Mukasey Nomination [New York Times]
Open Thread — The Nomination of Michael Mukasey [WSJ Law Blog]
Mukasey Confirmation Unlikely as Sen. Kennedy Joins Opposition to President’s AG Nominee [Blogonaut]

short bus shortbus special education Washington DC Above the Law blog.jpgWhile you wait for more bonus announcements to trickle in, check out a benchslap from the nation’s capital. The Washington Examiner reports:

Furious over the city’s “stunning ignorance” of the crisis facing its special-education system, a federal judge has given the District of Columbia one week to come up with a cost-fixing schedule — or face contempt charges.

In an unusually caustic order, U.S. District Judge Paul L. Friedman has ordered State Superintendent Deborah L. Gist and schools Chancellor Michelle Rhee to come up with a policy for setting rates with the thousands of private schools and vendors with which it does business.

Judge Friedman had especially harsh words for the city’s counsel:

“The defendants’ response demonstrates a stunning ignorance of the history of [the] litigation and the operative orders issued by this court,” the judge wrote. “The only plausible explanation is that the attorneys whose names appear on the signature page … must not have read it. …”

Lighten up, Your Honor. Lots of people sign stuff they didn’t draft, or even read. They’re called partners.
(And reading court filings is overrated. Just ask Chief Judge Jacobs.)
Judge sets deadline for special ed plan [Washington Examiner]
Earlier: Chief Judge Dennis Jacobs: Not Running for Student Body President

associate bonus watch 2007 law firm Above the Law blog.jpgPaul Weiss has matched. The year-end bonuses top out at $65,000 (like Debevoise and Simpson, and unlike Cravath).
The special bonuses will be paid out on November 21.
Bonuses for counsel TBD.
Earlier: Associate Bonus Watch 2007 archives (scroll down)

D Kyle Sampson Kyle Sampson Kyle D Sampson Kyle Samson Above the Law blog.jpgOf all the characters in the U.S. Attorney firings drama, Kyle Sampson, former chief of staff to former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales, was not our favorite. When he testified on Capitol Hill, he was earnest, sweaty, and decidedly non-fabulous — unlike Monica Goodling, who took the Senate Judiciary Committee by storm with a dazzling performance.
But even though his government service ended inauspiciously, Sampson has done just fine for himself. From the Salt Lake Tribune:

Three Washington lawyers with Utah ties – including the chief of staff to former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales – are joining the food and drug practice at the firm Hunton & Williams.

D. Kyle Sampson, a Cedar City native, was Gonzales’ chief of staff at the Justice Department until he resigned amid a controversy over the firing of eight U.S. Attorneys, a move that spawned congressional investigations. Sampson, who compiled the list of attorneys who were fired, testified for hours before House and Senate committees in public hearings and private interviews.

Before joining the Justice Department he was an Associate Counsel to the President at the White House, was director of personnel for the Bush administration, and was an aide to Sen. Orrin Hatch on the Judiciary Committee. He is a graduate of Brigham Young University and Chicago University law school.

We wonder if the Mormon Mafia had a hand in his hiring. They are to the legal world what the Gay Mafia is to fashion!
Sampson, ex-aide to Gonzales, joins law firm [Salt Lake Tribune]

D Kyle Sampson Kyle Sampson Kyle D Sampson Kyle Samson Above the Law blog.jpgOf all the characters in the U.S. Attorney firings drama, Kyle Sampson, former chief of staff to former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales, was not our favorite. When he testified on Capitol Hill, he was earnest, sweaty, and decidedly non-fabulous — unlike Monica Goodling, who took the Senate Judiciary Committee by storm with a dazzling performance.
But even though his government service ended inauspiciously, Sampson has done just fine for himself. From the Salt Lake Tribune:

Three Washington lawyers with Utah ties – including the chief of staff to former Attorney General Alberto Gonzales – are joining the food and drug practice at the firm Hunton & Williams.

D. Kyle Sampson, a Cedar City native, was Gonzales’ chief of staff at the Justice Department until he resigned amid a controversy over the firing of eight U.S. Attorneys, a move that spawned congressional investigations. Sampson, who compiled the list of attorneys who were fired, testified for hours before House and Senate committees in public hearings and private interviews.

Before joining the Justice Department he was an Associate Counsel to the President at the White House, was director of personnel for the Bush administration, and was an aide to Sen. Orrin Hatch on the Judiciary Committee. He is a graduate of Brigham Young University and Chicago University law school.

We wonder if the Mormon Mafia had a hand in his hiring. They are to the legal world what the Gay Mafia is to fashion!
Sampson, ex-aide to Gonzales, joins law firm [Salt Lake Tribune]

associate bonus watch 2007 law firm Above the Law blog.jpgJudicial clerkships. Year-end bonuses. Two great tastes that go great together.
We received some inquiries about whether clerks who leave law firms to go off and clerk might receive some kind of partial or prorated year-end bonus. It struck us as a rather obscure topic, of interest to only a small group of people.
But then the subject came up repeatedly in the comments to yesterday’s Debevoise bonus news. A reader pointed out that “with the end of salary match, this could be a question that could somewhat influence the choices of potential experienced clerks.”
So we’ve decided to write about it. From a tipster:

I am a federal clerk and my co-clerk, who worked at Kirkland & Ellis in NY for a year prior to his clerkship, was recently told that he will be paid the bonus he would have received had he not left to clerk. In other words, he will receive the pro-rated amount from Jan. 2007 to Sep. 2007 (8 months worth of 35K) even though he no longer works at K&E. This payment is NOT contingent on him returning to the firm after his clerkship.

This strikes us as highly unusual — and quite generous on Kirkland’s part. We don’t know about the mechanics or the exact timing of this payment, but we’d suggest to the lucky clerk that he talk to his judge to make sure this doesn’t raise any issues.
A little more, after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Clerkship Bonus Watch: Year-End Bonuses for Clerks Who Left Biglaw?”

jack o lantern pumpkin halloween.jpgSometimes the partners don’t like it if you gorge yourself on “their” candy. But yesterday was different. We hope you had a Happy Halloween!!! (And that you’re not too hungover from last night’s partying.)
How did your firm celebrate this spooky occasion? Seyfarth Shaw went all out:

Halloween treats were served in a mock coffin. The menu included blood-red cupcakes decorated with bleeding fangs and bats to be washed down with Jones soda in limited edition ghoulish flavors (Lemon Drop Dead, Strawberry Slime, and Gruesome Grape).

And you thought paying $145K was scary enough!
Please share amusing Halloween anecdotes — partners in crazy costumes, conference rooms converted into haunted houses, etc. — in the comments. Thanks.
P.S. For your reading pleasure, here’s a Halloween-themed link, from yesterday’s WSJ Law Blog: The Legal Implications of Throwing Eggs. Executive summary: think twice before TP’ing that partner’s mailbox.
Update: The Department of Justice got into the Halloween spirit:

Despite the travails of the Department, our emergency response and preparedness staff are on the job. No, I’m not referring to providing assistance to wildfire-torn California. I’m talking about dressing your children in flame-retardant Halloween costumes and ensuring your home is well lit to ” to prevent injuries to little ghosts and goblins.” Our tax dollars at work! (See email sent out to DOJ employees below.)

The email appears after the jump.

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “So How Was Your Halloween?”

* Jury thinks that idiots from Kansas church doth protest too much at funeral; $10.9 million for father of killed Marine. [Baltimore Sun via How Appealing]
* Justice department fails in prosecution of its (former) own. [New York Times]
* Senate Judiciary to vote on Mukasey next Tuesday. [ Jurist]
* Execution back to Cali – I don’t think so. [Jurist]
* Some lateral benchslappery in Georgia. [Atlanta Journal-Constitution]

associate bonus watch 2007 law firm Above the Law blog.jpgWe have to hit the road; we’re going out of town. So this is the last you’ll hear from us in a little while. If you have new bonus announcements to pass along, please email us, or note them in the comments to this post. We will follow up when we return.
But there’s no need to tell us about the Simpson Thacher & Bartlett bonus announcement. We already have it, and we’ve reprinted it after the jump. Thanks!

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Associate Bonus Watch: Simpson Thacher!!!”

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