Quote of the Day

An anonymous lawyer in New York City

I’m not sure I’d recommend that a young person go into law.

When I was starting out, it was more of a profession, and your worth was determined by the service you provided. Now it’s become more of a business, and your worth is determined by the fee you’re able to collect.

– An honest lawyer who happened to be passing through Grand Central Terminal in Manhattan when he was photographed by Brandon Stanton of Humans of New York.

(Do you agree with him? Feel free to sound off in the comments.)

Jason Bohn

The victim was a young woman who fought for her life until she was overcome by the defendant. He has justly been held accountable for his actions.

– Queens District Attorney Richard Brown, commenting on Jason Bohn’s recent conviction on first-degree murder charges in the death of his girlfriend. Bohn, a graduate of the University of Florida College of Law, was profiled in the New York Times in an article about the perils of law school.

Johnny Weir

It is a private matter I do not wish to discuss.

– World bronze medalist Johnny Weir, in comments made outside of a New Jersey Municipal Court following his appearance before a judge on a domestic violence charge. Weir allegedly bit his husband Victor Voronov’s ear one month before the Winter Games in Sochi. Voronov is a graduate of Georgetown Law. The charge was ultimately dismissed, but not before a judge told Weir what a “nice hairdo” he had.

Rachel Canning

My parents have rationalized their actions by blaming me for not following their rules. They stopped paying my high school tuition to punish the school and me and have redirected my college fund, indicating their refusal to afford me an education as a punishment.

Rachel Canning, the Catholic schoolgirl from New Jersey who’s suing her parents for her high school and college costs (plus her lawyer fees). Canning claims her parents abandoned her after she moved out of their home in October.

Nicor Gas claims that all customers recorded heard a ‘warning’ before being recorded, and ‘consented’ by remaining on the line after the warning was given. But under the law, any consent only gave Nicor Gas a right to record, not to divulge or use the recordings. Any ‘consent’ they got from customers that permitted them to record was for the limited purpose of internal quality assurance – not for divulgence to outside parties, and certainly not for use in public court proceedings

Adam Levitt, a lawyer with Grant & Eisenhofer, in a class action filed against Nicor Gas, a natural gas distributor in northern Illinois. Nicor had a plan. They were so proud of using their recordings of customers in their defense. Too bad Illinois has an Eavesdropping Act that prohibits that. D’oh!

You basically dropped trou. You showed your rear end to this court. You acted like a fool in this courtroom.

– Chief Judge Jim Roberson of the Alamance County District Court, scolding defendant Jonathan Lee Gaddy after the 19-year-old pulled down his pants in court following a hearing on an underage drinking charge. Roberson had twice before instructed Gaddy to pull his pants up to his waist. After Gaddy pulled his pants down to his knees, Roberson sentenced him to a 10-day stay in the county jail for his contempt of court.

I wasn’t surprised at all. I’ve lost so much of my health trying to prove this connection. As a journalist, I felt satisfied. I could finally prove the theories I had put forward. As a man, I felt I had been lied to. I was holding in my hand proof. It was the feeling of a scientist who has proven his theory with evidence.

– Serhi Scherbyna, the editor of The Insider, upon the discovery of documents revealing what he called “irrefutable proof” linking a coal trading enterprise that won billions in government contracts to the company that managed the Ukrainian presidential estate. These documents, discovered in the abandoned residence of the deposed prosecutor general, Viktor Pshonka, included an early draft of a Skadden Arps report marked up by Ukrainian officials pushing for even more sympathetic treatment of the trial against Prime Minister Yulia V. Tymoshenko.

Lisa Kudrow

You really in real life bear no relationship to the character Phoebe, right?

Mark Baute, attorney for Scott Howard, while cross-examining “Friends” star Lisa Kudrow on the witness stand earlier this week. Baute accused Kudrow of “pretending to be dumb” and acting like her well-known character, Phoebe Buffay, during her testimony.

(Howard served as Kudrow’s manager during her time on the show, and claims he’s owed more than $1.7 million in residuals. A jury returned a verdict in Howard’s favor today.)

You can take your analogy and shove it right up your [expletive], judge.

Kenneth Conley, a convicted bank robber, at his sentencing for having masterminded a daring escape from the Chicago MCC in 2012. Judge Gary Feinerman could only respond with a “thank you,” making this a rare “defendant-slap.”

The term “daring” is no understatement when it comes to this escape. Conley and his accomplice cut a hole in a concrete wall and then used a rope fashioned from bed sheets and dental floss to scale down the prison’s outer wall in the middle of the night.

(If you’d be scared scaling a two-story wall suspended only by dental floss, check out a picture of the wall they actually scaled down.)

double red triangle arrows Continue reading “Prison Escapee Tells Federal Judge To Stick It”

Are porn stars’ rights deserving of strict scrutiny?

[W]hat I ask for is simple. I, like all other sex workers, want to be treated with dignity and respect. I want equal representation under the law and within societal institutions. I want people to acknowledge our humanity.

Lauren A., a freshman at Duke University, defending her decision to perform in pornography to fund her education. In her personal manifesto, posted on xoJane, she rejects her categorization as a “bimbo” and a “whore,” and envisions a world in which sex workers will enjoy the equal protection of the laws.

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