Any trial judge with the Gall to benchslap the Supreme Court has a serious set of cojones.

Accordingly, Judge Richard Kopf (D. Neb.) -- who sent beer to Professor Doug Berman, as recently noted -- is our Judge of the Day. See links collected below.

We agree with Tony Mauro: Judge Kopf's irreverent "top 10" list of lessons learned from the high court's sentencing jurisprudence is "a provocative jaw-dropper that may get Kopf scratched off the holiday card list at the Supreme Court."

Judge Kopf's "Top Ten" take on SCOTUS sentencing work [Sentencing Law and Policy]
The Top Ten Things I Learned from Apprendi, Blakely, Booker, Rita, Kimbrough, and Gall (PDF) [Sentencing Law and Policy]
Federal Judge's 'Top 10' List Takes On Supreme Court's Sentencing Decisions [Legal Times]
Richard G. Kopf bio [Federal Judicial Center]

Unlike yesterday -- and by the way, we'll keep the reader poll open for a few more hours -- today we have no difficulty picking our Lawyer of the Day. Hollywood lawyer James Jackson maltreated his Filipino maid. We do not like it when you mess with our peeps.

From the AP (via Law.com):

A former Hollywood studio attorney and his wife were sentenced Monday for abusive treatment of their Filipino maid in a case federal prosecutors said "amounts to modern-day slavery."

James Jackson, the former vice president of legal affairs at Sony Pictures, was ordered to perform 200 hours of community service and pay a $5,000 fine. His wife, Elizabeth, was sentenced to three years in prison after her attorneys unsuccessfully pleaded for her to receive home detention.

These Hollywood types are ruthless (we've watched "Entourage"). Studio lawyers make Biglaw partners look like social workers. Consider the treatment alleged by the former maid in her civil suit against the couple:

[Former maid Nena] Ruiz claimed in her civil lawsuit that Elizabeth Jackson regularly slapped her and pulled her hair. She also said she was forced to sleep on a dog bed and was given three-day-old food to eat even as she was expected to clean and provide fresh fruit to the Jacksons' pets. The Jacksons only paid her $300 for her work....

See? Studio lawyers are meaner than law firm partners. At least associates get paid $160K for their suffering.

Happily, Nena Ruiz ultimately made out quite well. She was awarded $825,000 in damages by the jury that heard her case.

P.S. In fairness to Mr. Jackson, it appears that much of the abuse was perpetrated by his wife. In her allocution, Elizabeth Jackson told the court: "In my life I have always tried and strived to do the right thing. I failed in this case." Um, yeah.

P.P.S. A tipster observes: "Is it just me, or have these modern-day slavery stories been popping up a lot lately? See here."

Former Sony Pictures Lawyer and Wife Sentenced in Forced Labor of Filipino Maid [AP via Law.com]
Hollywood couple sentenced in Filipino maid 'slave' case [AFP via Philippine Inquirer]
In Pictures: Long Island Slaver Family On Facebook [Gawker]

* NRA defends the rights of hurricane victims to shoot at the National Guard keep guns. [AP via How Appealing]

* French "aid" workers sentenced to eight years of hard labor in Chad "orphan" case. [Jurist]

* Apparently if you're a rapper you can show up at court when you damn well please. [Athens Banner-Herald]

* If you feel guilty about it, at least you can take comfort in the fact that you've helped set up an appeal. [CNN]

* Bush administration seeks greater power over promotions of military lawyers. [Boston Globe via How Appealing]

* Saudi king pardons rape victim who had been sentenced to 200 lashes (for being alone with a man at the time of the attack). [AP via New York Times]

* Limited effects of recent SCOTUS sentencing decision? [Chicago Tribune]

* CNN's guide to Mitchell report players. [CNN]

* Law Blog's guide to Sen. George Mitchell (including a funny story of a minor faux pas). [WSJ Law Blog]

* Poll suggests support for individual rights reading of Second Amendment. [CNN]

* Comcast v. NFL Network dispute produces another lawsuit. [Sportsline]

Yes, we are aware that Michael Vick was sentenced to 23 months imprisonment, for his involvement in a dogfighting conspiracy. We took note of the sentencing in Morning Docket.

We really aren't that into sports, and we weren't planning on saying much about the Vick sentencing. But it appears that some of you would like to talk about it, so here's a post for doing so.

Here are articles from the AP and the New York Times (which helpfully notes that Judge Judge Henry E. Hudson is a dog owner -- should he have recused?). A reader poll appears at the end of this post.

Meanwhile, in other federal sentencing news, the U.S. Supreme Court handed down two sentencing decisions today, and disgraced media mogul Conrad Black was sentenced to six and a half years in prison.

These developments are a bit too substantive for the pages of ATL. But you can read more about them over at Professor Doug Berman's Sentencing Law & Policy, SCOTUSblog, and the WSJ Law Blog.

* Vick to be sentenced. [Atlanta Journal-Constitution]

* He Flatley denied the allegations, and apparently he was telling the truth. [AP via Reno Gazette-Journal]

* All's well that ends well for fired U.S. Attorneys. [Los Angeles Times via How Appealing]

* And home will come lawyer, baby and all. [Atlanta Journal-Constitution]

* First thing we do, let's detain all the lawyers. [Jurist]

* And speaking of detained lawyers... [Jurist]

Because it's much better to have a toy manufacturer as an enemy than an angry mob of club-wielding Sudanese. Here's the latest news about the whole "Teddy Bear named Mohammed" controversy, from the Daily Mail (via Drudge):

Thousands of Islamic fanatics wielding clubs and knives are marching through the streets of Khartoum demanding the execution of teddy bear teacher Gillian Gibbons.

As the mother-of-two started a 15-day prison term, protestors left mosques across the Sudanese capital to denounce the "lenient verdict" and call for the death penalty.

For those of you who haven't been following the story, here's some background:

Mrs Gibbons, a divorced mother-of-two, was arrested on Sunday and on Wednesday charged with insulting Islam, inciting hatred and showing contempt for religious beliefs.

It came after seven-year-old pupils chose to call a teddy bear Mohammed at the Unity High School in Khartoum, where she had worked since August.

During the court case behind closed doors yesterday it was revealed that the school's office assistant, Sara Khawad, had complained to the education authorities - leading to the teacher's arrest.

In a statement read to court, Mrs Gibbons tearfully stressed she had not meant to cause offence and pointed out that it had been her pupils who had chosen the name.

Executing someone for naming a Teddy Bear "Mohammed" might raise an Eighth Amendment issue. But we don't think they have that over in Sudan.

Thousands of Islamic fanatics wielding knives demand jailed teddy bear teacher is executed [Daily Mail]

Call us old-fashioned, barbaric, or unenlightened -- but this strikes us as a bit ridiculous. From ABC News:

Massachusetts lawmakers say a proposed measure that would ban parents from spanking their children, even in their own homes, is a way to protect kids from abuse. But many parents believe it's an example of government run amok.

In all 50 states, parents are legally allowed to spank their children. But in 29 states it's illegal for a teacher to practice corporal punishment, including spanking.

A Massachusetts nurse is hoping to change that and make the state the first in the nation to ban corporal punishment at home.

"I think it's ironic that domestic violence applies to everyone except the most vulnerable — children," said Kathleen Wolf, who wrote the bill.

Massachusetts lawmakers will consider the bill today.

Ah, the People's Republic of Massachusetts. If Willie Horton had gotten spanked more as a kid, maybe he wouldn't have turned to a life of crime.

More discussion, plus the obligatory reader poll -- yes, we really do care what you think! -- after the jump.

This just in, from the AP:

The Georgia Supreme Court upheld a ruling that Genarlow Wilson's 10-year prison sentence for having consensual oral sex with a fellow teenager is cruel and unusual, and ordered him released from prison.

Wilson was convicted of aggravated child molestation for having oral sex with a 15-year-old girl when he was 17. He has served more than two years of a mandatory 10-year sentence.

Attorney General Thurbert Baker appealed a Monroe County Superior Court judge's decision to reduce Wilson's felony conviction to a misdemeanor and free him from prison.

Baker said the judge overstepped his authority when he granted Wilson's motion last month. Wilson's attorney argued his 10-year prison sentence is cruel and unusual punishment.

Update: From an insightful tipster:

Regarding the Georgia case, it may be worth noting that the U.S. Supreme Court will be hearing argument on a related issue on October 31: whether state Supreme Court decisions must use the U.S. Supreme Court’s standard in applying criminal law decisions retroactively or instead may expand retroactive application of those decisions to a broader class of criminal defendants.

Georgia Supreme Court Rules Prison Term for Sex Crime Cruel and Unusal [AP via Fox News]

Earlier: We Sure Hope It Was Worth Two Years in Prison

* Who, Exactly, Is A Journalist? [Concurring Opinions]

* Law Student May Have Shot At Textbook With Assault Rifle [JournalGazette]

* Nixon Peabody Links Up With Boutique for London Launch -- Everyone's A Winner! [Law.com]

* Man gets life in 'Curious George' killing [CNN]

* "I'm not a morning person." Child Abuse Excuse Riles Judge [New York Times]

* Courts and the Law: Justice's Blind Trust [CQ Weekly]

* Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama: When They Were Young [New York Magazine]

* The Carnival of the Capitalists #211 includes law blogs this week.

And we're not talking about CSM partners working young associates to death, riding them hard and putting them away wet. We're speaking more literally.

We mentioned this story briefly at the time of his guilty plea, but his sentencing yesterday gives us the opportunity to revisit it in more depth. From the AP:

A tax lawyer who paid a woman so he could have sex with her two underage daughters was sentenced Thursday and declared a sex offender but wasn't expected to spend much more time behind bars.

James Colliton pleaded guilty this month to second- and third-degree statutory rape and patronizing a prostitute. He received a sentence of one year on each count, to run concurrently.

But because he has already been jailed for 19 months, Colliton, 43, was eligible for immediate release. His lawyer, Howard Greenberg, said he expected the defendant to be released Thursday.

So where's Colliton headed? Due to his felony conviction, he won't be able to return to the practice of law (at least not immediately). But might Cravath give him a non-legal or administrative job, perhaps in Recruiting? He likes working with young people.

(Such a gig, however, probably wouldn't pay Colliton the $500,000 salary that he earned as a senior or permanent associate at Cravath -- more than partners at some firms.)

NYC Lawyer Sentenced for Underage Sex [AP]
'Lolita Lawyer' among worst of sex offenders [New York Daily News]
Former Cravath Associate Pleads Guilty in Underage Sex Scandal [New York Law Journal]
In Plea Deal, Ex-Cravath Lawyer Admits To Sex Crimes [WSJ Law Blog]

Earlier: Tax Lawyers in Jail

* As a judge, Michael Mukasey cited Shakespeare in snarking on -- and striking down -- the federal sentencing guidelines. [AP]

* Speaking of district judges, the well-regarded Judge Paul Cassell (D. Utah -- at right) is resigning from the bench -- partly due to low judicial pay. [Sentencing Law & Policy via WSJ Law Blog]

* What not to wear when you go to the airport. [Boston Globe]

* Unlike, say, the Ninth Circuit, the Second Circuit follows on-point Supreme Court precedent. [TaxProf Blog]

* Your submissions for Blawg Review #127 are respectfully requested. [Deliberations]

Update: The citation for the Mukasey opinion is United States v. Mendez, 691 F. Supp. 656, 663-64 (S.D.N.Y. 1988).

Back in this post, in which we incorrectly predicted that Mukasey wouldn't get the AG nomination, we wrote: "We'd also add that Judge Mukasey probably isn't solidly conservative enough for the White House. See, e.g., his views on the federal sentencing guidelines."

Remember Judge Herman Thomas, the Alabama state court judge who allegedly spanked a number of prisoners? Now there's a theme song for the scandal, entitled "Spank Me." Check it out here.

The creator and artist, Jolene Roxbury, is a former paralegal who decided several years ago that comedy was her true calling. You can learn more about her over at her website. Nice work, Jolene!

Jolene Roxbury: Certified Verbal Conversationalist

Earlier: Judge of the Day: Herman Thomas

Mobile County Circuit Judge Herman Thomas is ATL's Judge of the Day. He takes the prize for his innovative approach to sentencing. From the Mobile Press-Register:

Authorities are investigating allegations that now-suspended Mobile County Circuit Judge Herman Thomas periodically removed prisoners from Mobile County Metro Jail and spanked them in a room at the courthouse, according to courthouse sources involved in the inquiry.

Once inside the room, according to the sources, the judge would ask the young men to drop their pants and prepare to be spanked with what they described as a wooden or fraternity-like paddle.

To quote ex-inmate Paris Hilton, "That's hot." We agree with these commenters:

"[I]n San Francisco we have lots of people who pay $200 a session for that kind of treatment. Perhaps this judge has a bright future in Bay Area."

"That's some kinky place. I think Senator Larry Craig would like to break INTO that prison!"

More details -- including a description of the secret six-by-eight room that allegedly served as the judge's S-and-M dungeon -- are available here.

Authorities investigating paddling allegations against Judge Thomas [Mobile Press-Register]
Judge Accused Of Paddling Inmates [WKRG.com]

The plea hearing for the embattled star quarterback took place this morning. One of Michael Vick's lawyers, Billy Martin, spoke to reporters on the courthouse steps. He stated that "this matter is concluded until December 10th, when Judge Hudson will sentence Michael Vick according to the plea agreement." He also announced that Vick will make a statement of his own at 11:30 AM today.

At the hearing, Judge Henry Hudson told Michael Vick something along these lines: "You know you're taking your chances here. I'm not bound by the recommendations [of the parties]."

A correct statement of the law, especially after Booker? Yes. A smart thing for a judge to do at a plea hearing, to prevent the defendant from later claiming he was blindsided? Sure.

But, reading the tea leaves a bit, we'd hazard a guess that Judge Hudson might give Vick significantly more than the 12 or so months that the parties will recommend (per the plea agreement). Stay tuned.

(We'd guess that the parties will recommend a year and a day, which will make Vick eligible for certain "good time" credits applicable only to sentences over a year.)

The plea agreement (PDF) for star quarterback Michael Vick has been filed in federal court. In the statement of facts (PDF) accompanying the agreement, Vick admits involvement in the dogfighting conspiracy (including funding it), but declines to admit a number of other allegations. According to ESPN, Vick claims that he "did not place side bets and did not receive proceeds from purses from the fights."

Here's what the agreement provides with respect to sentencing:

Assuming zero criminal history, an adjusted offense level of 13 gives you an imprisonment range of 12 to 18 months. Of course, and as noted in the agreement, the sentencing judge is not bound by the guidelines (thanks to Booker).

What's next in procedural terms, from CNN:

Vick, 27, is scheduled to appear in federal court in Richmond, Virginia, on Monday, where he is expected to plead guilty before a judge. The judge in the case will have the final say over the plea agreement.

Presiding over Vick's case is Judge Henry Hudson, a Bush II appointee to the bench and a former U.S. Attorney for the Eastern District of Virginia (under Bush I). He has an impressive resume, but we don't know much about him personally. We welcome your thoughts on Judge Hudson in the comments.

Vick files plea agreement admitting to dogfighting [ESPN.com]
Vick admits dog killing, conspiracy [CNN]

Things aren't look so hot for football star Michael Vick right now. See here and here.

Despite the incriminating statements of his co-defendants, Vick still hasn't reached a plea agreement with the government. Rumor has it that there's a split among Vick's lawyers about whether to take a plea deal.

After the jump, we post an analysis from a reader suggesting that, under the applicable Sentencing Guidelines (which are of course advisory post-Booker), Vick shouldn't necessarily serve prison time.

But we suspect that the feds wouldn't allow Vick to get off without some prison time (at least a year). And if Vick doesn't plead guilty to the current indictment, they'll nail him with a superseding indictment that includes RICO charges (which will vastly ramp up his exposure if convicted).

Check out this reader's analysis, after the jump.

Remember those dancing Filipino prisoners?

Well, these days Asia is abounding with new and interesting approaches to crime and punishment. From the AP:

Thai police officers who break rules will be forced to wear hot pink armbands featuring "Hello Kitty," the Japanese icon of cute, as a mark of shame, a senior officer said Monday.

Police officers caught littering, parking in a prohibited area, or arriving late among other misdemeanors will be forced to stay in the division office and wear the armband all day, said Police Col. Pongpat Chayaphan. The officers won't wear the armband in public....

"Simple warnings no longer work. This new twist is expected to make them feel guilt and shame and prevent them from repeating the offense, no matter how minor," said Pongpat, acting chief of the Crime Suppression Division in Bangkok.

But Hello Kitty is eminently appealing. Could this strategy backfire? Might there be some police officers who will deliberately misbehave, to win the privilege of having that cute cat straddling their bicep?

P.S. Hello Kitty isn't our favorite Sanrio character. That honor goes to Pekkle the Duck. He's unspeakably adorable!

Bad Thai Cops to Endure Kitty Shame [Associated Press]

Earlier: Sentencing Reform: Dancing Will Set You Free

We're guessing you've all seen this video of 1,500 Filipino prisoners dancing to Michael Jackson's "Thriller." It has been discussed all over the blogosphere and MSM. E.g, Gawker; Concurring Opinions; Times of London.

(We're just surprised that sentencing guru Doug Berman -- who, by the way, moderated a great panel on the federal sentencing guidelines at the recent ACS convention we attended (and will write about later) -- hasn't weighed in on this innovative approach to criminal punishment.)

In case you haven't seen it, here's the clip:

Pretty cool, eh? Professor Charles Nesson of Harvard Law School quipped, "I want to meet the warden."

Well, Professor Nesson, we can help. As it turns out, Byron Garcia -- the prison official who came up with this idea, and uploaded the video clip to YouTube -- is our uncle!

You can read our correspondence with Tito Byron, after the jump.

Not allowing the defendant to allocute before pronouncing sentence is a rookie mistake for a judge to make. So if a judge makes it, despite having been on the bench for over 25 years, he can expect to get benchslapped. From a Wisconsin reader:

Not sure if this is quite up your alley, but Federal District Judge John Shabaz got bench-slapped pretty hard by the Seventh Circuit in an opinion that came down today.

He's like a million years old and is best known around here for falling asleep during trials and objecting himself and sustaining his own objections. We've decided not to get really worried until he starts overruling himself.

Well, as long as a former clerk doesn't write a tell-all memoir, Judge Shabaz should be just fine.

Wherrrreeee's Johnny [Seriatim]
United States v. Luepke (PDF) [U.S. Court of Appeals for the Seventh Circuit]
John C. Shabaz bio [FJC]