Portland, Tennessee high school math teach Sandy Binkley was convicted of statutory rape back in September. The 37-year-old woman had sex with a 17-year-old student in a locker room.

Binkley argued that the 17-year-old student raped her. She gave an interview to Tennessee News Channel 5 before her trial:

“There was one incident with one student - who was a month away from being 18. He was bigger than me and he forced himself on me,” said Binkley. “He came into the room and forced himself upon me.”

The jury didn’t buy it.

On Friday, Binkley was sentenced. And man, the judge essentially put her behind bars and threw away the key. The Tennessean reports:

A former Portland High School teacher convicted of having sex with her underage teacher’s aide has been sentenced to 12 years in prison.

District Attorney Ray Whitley said Sandy Binkley “got what she had coming to her.”

“(Judge Dee Gay) gave her the maximum sentence and that’s what she deserved,” Whitley said.

The woman got 12 years — the maximum sentence — for having sex with a 17-year-old? Really? Does that make sense to everybody here?

Binkley’s lawyers (obviously) feel the judge went a little overboard. Details after the jump.

The big decisional news out of New York today is the guilty verdict in the Brooke Astor trial. Anthony Marshall, the son of the late socialite and philanthropist, was convicted in a scheme to defraud Mrs. Astor.

But we also have news of another notable ruling. Longtime readers of Above the Law will recall the case of Jeremy Pitcock, the successful intellectual-property litigator who was fired from Kasowitz Benson in December 2007. The firm issued an unusual statement saying that Pitcock had engaged in “extremely inappropriate personal conduct.”

Pitcock sued Kasowitz for defamation. Kasowitz turned around and sued Pitcock, alleging in its complaint that he “subject[e]d at least twelve of the firm’s female employees…. to a pattern of unwelcome sexual advances.”

Now a judge has ruled in both of the cases. From Nate Raymond of the New York Law Journal:

A nearly two year-long public brawl between Kasowitz, Benson, Torres & Friedman and a former partner it fired for sexual harassment could be quieting down now that a Manhattan Supreme Court judge has dismissed both parties’ lawsuits.

Justice Martin Shulman (See Profile) last week found “unavailing” and “unpersuasive” the arguments made against the firm by intellectual property lawyer Jeremy Pitcock, who sued for defamation, breach of contract and breach of fiduciary duty.

The judge also found Kasowitz Benson failed to show how Mr. Pitcock had damaged the firm.

Executive summary (or West headnote): “A pox on both your houses.”

On the media website Mediaite, we are erroneously listed as having an affiliation with the Late Show with David Letterman. We wish! If that were the case, then maybe we’d have inside dirt on one of the juiciest media scandals to come along in a while.

And it’s a media scandal with a legal angle — several, in fact. Last Friday, we named the woman at the eye of the storm, Stephanie Birkitt, our Lawyer of the Day. Birkitt — the former Letterman paramour whose ex-boyfriend, Robert “Joe” Halderman, stands accused of trying to extort David Letterman — is a lawyer. The blonde hottie is a graduate of Cardozo Law School, and she passed the bar exam twice — in New York and Connecticut. Very impressive, Ms. Birkitt!

Alas, Stephanie Birkitt may be a two-timer in more than one sense of the word. We previously stated, relying on other sources, that Birkitt’s sexual relationship with her former boss ended in 2003. Now we’re hearing otherwise, from the New York Post:

Pretty former “Late Show” staffer Stephanie Birkitt revealed in her diary that she continued having sex with boss David Letterman even after moving in with her CBS-producer boyfriend, who later allegedly tried to extort him over the affair, sources told The Post yesterday.

Letterman and Birkitt enjoyed romantic hikes last fall at his sprawling ranch in eastern Montana — where he was married in March — while her boyfriend, “48 Hours Mystery” producer Robert “Joe” Halderman, stayed home in Connecticut, the sources said.

At the time, Birkitt, 34, insisted to Halderman that she and the 62-year-old Letterman had just “a platonic relationship,” a source said.

“I’m his best friend,” Birkitt told the worried 51-year-old Halderman, the source said.

A friend with benefits? Like free law school tuition? Speaking of which, according to our reader poll, almost two-thirds of ATL readers would sleep with David Letterman in exchange for free law school tuition.

UPDATE: According to Maureen Dowd (gavel bang: commenter), Letterman’s company loaned Birkitt the money for law school, which she paid back. If true, this is disappointing. What’s the point of sleeping with the boss if you can’t get paid for it?

More law-related Letterman links, after the jump.

For long-time readers of Above The Law, Herman Thomas is a familiar name. He’s the former Alabama state court judge who allegedly enjoyed spanking male prisoners, traded favorable treatment for sexual favors, and improperly interfered on behalf of a cousin in legal trouble.

He gave up the paddle gavel two years ago. Now he’s headed to trial.

From the Associated Press:

Chief Assistant District Attorney Nicki Patterson said authorities began looking at Thomas after he changed a jail sentence in 2006 for his cousin, former Mobile County school commissioner David Thomas, even though the case was being handled by another judge. Other cases that Thomas had taken over from other judges without their approval soon surfaced, she said.

And what happened to the prisoners in the cases commandeered by Thomas?

Over the years, numerous proposals have been made to split the Ninth Circuit, the nation’s largest federal appeals court. There are certainly reasonable arguments to be made in favor of a split.

But regardless of the merits of a split, the careers of politicians who have backed these proposals seem to meet unfortunate ends. We’ve dubbed this effect the Ninth Circuit Curse. Check out this list of victims.

Last Wednesday, Senator John Ensign (R-NV) introduced a bill to split the Ninth Circuit. The very next day, he wound up on the front page of the New York Times — for possible ethics violations. Coincidence?

Politicians, consider yourselves warned: mess with the Ninth Circuit at your peril.

Senator’s Aid After Affair Raises Flags Over Ethics [New York Times]
Senate Ethics Committee investigating Ensign [Political Ticker / CNN]

Earlier: The Ninth Circuit Curse
The Ninth Circuit Curse Strikes Again

To paraphrase this video, inspired by an Avenue Q song and submitted to Above the Law’s first-ever Law Revue Contest, “What can you do with a JD from Cardozo?”

Um…. David Letterman? From Bitten & Bound:

David Letterman was the victim of a $2 million extortion plot and we have now discovered that according to New York public records, Stephanie Birkitt, 34, a former intern on The Late Show, lived with the accused extortionist Robert Joe Halderman, a CBS 48 Hours producer, and may have unwittingly fed him the information through the pages of her diary, photos and personal correspondence….

According to TMZ, Birkitt is one of the women who engaged in an affair with her boss, but ended it in 2003, prior to the birth of Letterman’s son….

Birkitt began working as a page for CBS New, 48 Hours, and The Late Show while still in college [at Wake Forest] in 1996. She spent a short time as an associate producer on segments for correspondent Erin Moriarty but soon decided that she wasn’t a news hound. That was when Letterman hired her as a personal assistant. She was initially brought on to handle his charities and his Indy car racing team, but her duties expanded over time.

Apparently so. Anyway, here’s the legal connection:

Birkett went on to the Benjamin N. Cardozo School of Law in New York City beginning in 2005 and passed the Connecticut bar exam in February 2009.

UPDATE: As noted in the comments, Birkitt also passed the New York bar exam in February. Congrats on passing two state bars, Steph!

FURTHER UPDATE: Actually, Birkitt’s relationship with Letterman may have lasted much longer. See here.

Now, before the elitists among you start ranking on Cardozo Law, there’s something you should know.

Deidre Dare is one of our favorite laid-off lawyers. She was working in Russia for Allen & Overy, and decided to pen a salacious online novel about her expat adventures. The literary critics at A&O were not pleased with the novel, which featured lots of drinking, sex, drugs, donkeys, and dwarves.

After she lost her job at Allen & Overy, she sued the firm.

Dare’s still in Moscow, where she pens a column for the Moscow News called sExpat. Recently, she wrote that money is tight and that she’s considering various options to increase her cash flow. Among some of her proposals are robbing banks, becoming a jewel thief, blackmailing someone, or prostituting herself. From the Moscow News:

Now, when I decided to go into the law, I wanted to take an expensive preparatory course for the law school admissions test. At the time, I was suffering severe “cash flow problems” and I asked my father to pay for the course, which he refused to do, considering it a waste of money. So, in order to raise the cash, I decided to become a “high class” whore.

I’d heard that this was something pretty Ivy League students sometimes did for money.

Sometimes the non-Ivy types do it too. So what are Dare’s rates?

Stalking, cat fights, cheating, assault, and a secret marriage. This is the scandalous news out of Vinton, Virginia (pop: 7,782) this week, thanks to a lawyer-lawyer-paralegal love triangle.

If you surf over to WDBJ to check out the tale, we advise watching the video and skipping the transcribed broadcast. It hurt our head to translate it. And it hurt our eyes to Photoshop the image at right — click to enlarge (if you dare).

Two bankruptcy law attorneys, Jeffrey Kessler and Ann Marie Miller (an Appalachian School of Law ‘06 grad), had been partnering on cases and in the bedroom. Ick. Apparently, Kessler then started secretly dating a younger woman, paralegal Jennifer Kelley.

That’s when things got messy — and, allegedly, violent.

Ed. note: Have a question for next week? Send it in to advice@abovethelaw.com.

ATL,

What is current law firm protocol with respect to affairs between partners and associates? The head of one the practice groups at my firm is having an affair with an associate in another group. It has been going on for awhile and is embarrassing for some of us who are aware (funny how people think they are being discreet, isn’t it?!). Am I obligated to tell someone? Will anything happen to them or is it generally acceptable (or not a concern) for this to go on? I’d like to send a note to the managing partner or head of HR — thoughts?

Rats of Nimh

Dear Rats of Nimh,

My first reaction to this question is, seriously, who cares? My second reaction is, calm down and get a life. Unless you think the associate has avoided layoffs (if any) because of protectia, what’s it to you if a partner you may or may not work with is having an affair with an associate whom he or she does not review?

I fail to see how this affair is embarrassing to you and others, unless you’re jealous that you were not selected as the object of desire. This happened to me once, where a partner I had a rabid crush on passed me over for another associate and I became enraged and threatened to three friends that I would lateral out because distance makes the heart grow fonder, at which point one of them reminded me that I had never actually spoken to said partner in real life, per se. The point is, “reverse Schadenfreude,” as my friend Megan likes to call it (i.e., fury at other peoples’ happiness), is a powerful emotion. It’s tough to think that others are experiencing carefree sexual liaisons and personal fulfillment while you code documents by the glow of your Pets Who Want to Kill Themselves computer wallpaper. However, polite society dictates that you grin and bear it. In these sort of situations, I find that gossiping viciously helps.

Emailing the managing partner or head of HR is patently ridiculous. They may be hosting the liaisons for all you know, like Jerry Seinfeld did for Madonna and A-Rod when he invited them to his Hamptons house to conduct their adultery in some peace and quiet.

Sorry to say, but you’ll just have to live with this one.

Your friend,
Marin

After the jump, no references to Les Miserables.

Remember the Ninth Circuit Curse? We wrote about it back in 2007, noting that “anyone who tries to mess with the Mighty Ninth eventually finds himself (or herself) in deep doo-doo.” Several politicians who have advocated splitting the Ninth Circuit — a sprawling court that can be challenging to administer, to be sure — have found themselves in some form of trouble or another. E.g., Senators Larry Craig, Ted Stevens, and Lisa Murkowski.

Now they’re joined by another. Although his sex scandal is being overshadowed by that of another Republican politician, Nevada Senator John Ensign (pictured) is watching his popularity plummet, after he admitted to an affair with an ex-staffer (who was once on the Ensign payroll, along with her husband). He may face an investigation into his conduct.

If anyone was going to fall victim to the Ninth Circuit Curse, it would be Senator Ensign. As noted on his website, “Senator Ensign has… taken the lead on legislation to split the Ninth Circuit Court of Appeals.” Not only did he push hard for splitting the circuit, but he actually testified in support of the split, at the time of the last big push for dividing the court.

The full tally of victims, after the jump.

As we mentioned last night, there is an interesting debate over what White & Case should have done in response to the adulterous sex scandal involving its associate, “Miami White.” The Daily Business Review takes a look at some of the competing theories for crisis management:

For White & Case, the unwanted publicity raises a question all law firm managers and public relations professionals should consider: If an employee’s dirty laundry gets a public airing, how can a law firm respond to minimize the damage?

When asked about the matter, White & Case spokesman William Sancho in Miami offered a brusque “no comment.”

Hours later, an official firm statement came out: “This is a personal matter for the individual involved, and we cannot comment on it.”

It wasn’t really surprising when White & Case declined to respond to the affairs of SexyLexus. But I wonder if Miami White was told by the firm that he couldn’t comment in the press? Cuckolded in Canada said his piece, SexyLexus called in, but multiple phone calls and emails to Miami White have not been returned.

Regardless of the particular plight of Miami White, should White & Case have gone in a different direction? Let’s get into it after the jump.

Yesterday, we told you about a bizarre love triangle — or perhaps pentagon — between a husband, a wife, and an associate in the Miami office of White & Case. Today, the wife (a.k.a. “SexyLexus”) called us to explain her side of the story and her relationship with her husband (a.k.a. “Cuckolded in Canada”) and the White & Case attorney (a.k.a. “Miami White”). We once again ask that commenters refrain from using real names in the comments.

SexyLexus called to make one thing clear. She told us, in no uncertain terms, “I am not a whore.”

In his email to Miami White’s colleagues at White & Case, Cuckolded in Canada claimed that SexyLexus was a porn star. She disagrees with that characterization:

It’s a camera-site. That is all it is. I am not in contact with anybody, there is no contact between me and anybody on that camera-site.

In fact, SexyLexus claims that not only did Cuckolded in Canada know about her online presence, but that he encouraged her to do it in order to make money for the family:

He told me to get back on the camera-site. I was out of the business, but Cuckolded in Canada told me to get back on to make money for the family … I think it turned him on, me doing it. … He loved it.

Despite her showing off the goods on camera and pursuing liaisons of late, SexyLexus was vehement about the paternity of her children not being in doubt:

Yes, the kids are Cuckolded in Canada’s. They are all his.

Above the Law once again reached out to Cuckolded in Canada and Miami White, but neither responded to our multiple inquires. But SexyLexus has more information on both of those guys, which she shares with Above the Law after the jump.

As noted even in the New York Times, the global mega-firm of White & Case has been hit hard by the recession. But allegedly one of the firm’s associates has been hitting it up — with another man’s wife.

The supposedly cuckolded husband has no intention of allowing this White & Case attorney to get away with an affair. The husband sent two accusatory emails to dozens of recipients who know him and / or the White & Case attorney. The emails have bounced around White & Case’s Miami office — and beyond. Due to their wide circulation, many of you have probably seen them already.

We’ve replaced the names of the participants with pseudonyms, but you’ll get the gist. Here is the initial email sent out on Sunday afternoon from “Cuckolded in Canada,” addressed to (1) his wife, “SexyLexus” (the origin of that name will become clear later); (2) the White & Case associate she was allegedly cheating with, hereinafter “Miami White”; and (3) dozens of third parties:

From: Cuckolded in Canada

Subject: When [Miami White] from White & Case Cheated with my Wife [SexyLexus] in May and June 2009

Miami White,

Families, wives, young children are valuable things. I work hard to take care of my family - a wife, 4 small children under the age of 6. It is the most valuable thing in the world to me.

When you decided to start sleeping with my wife while I was out of town over the last few weeks (May 27 - June 7 2009), you threatened my way of life, and you really hurt a lot of people - most notably the lives of my 4 very young children.

You are a securities lawyer at White & Case, so you know how to do due diligence. Perhaps you thought it was clever or fun, but attending a school recital with my wife who you’ve just met and started sleeping with over the last few weeks is extremely poor judgement. Sleeping with other mens wives, is alone, perhaps the poorest taste and the worst judgement all on its own. It implies a very low moral character. Perhaps you wish to plead ignorance, but a simple search on my name on the internet would indicate that I take a great deal of pride in my family. But after reviewing the text messages between you and my wife it would appear that you did the due diligence, that you knew she was spending the summer with me in Canada starting last week, and that we had small children and you were jeopardizing my family with your actions.

I have tried to contact you numerous times this week to address the situation and ask you to step aside… to let me address the issues now faced in our house. I have contacted your mobile at [Redacted] and your house at [Redacted] but you are too much of a coward to answer. You need to be made aware of your actions and the consequences they bear.

Miami White, and SexyLexus… what follows below are the text messages of your affair over the last few weeks as it unfolds. I would like to especially thank those at [my kids’ school] that watched this unfold at the school concert last week, and did nothing to alert me or defend my family. That is certainly a church and a school I want my children to grow up learning from. You have all seen me drop my kids off and pick them up there every single day for the last year. Did you think to mention anything when I showed up there last Monday June 8 at my kids ceremonies? You know how important they are to me.

And for all of you that think running around with other mens wives or husbands behind their spouses backs is acceptable behaviour - recognize that there are consequences and that many of us that will fight for our families and ferociously defend our home and children.

How’s that for an opening salvo? Wait until Cuckolded starts revealing the text messages between his wife and her purported paramours, after the jump.

The Not-So-Honorable Samuel Kent — the first federal judge to be charged with a sex crime, and now a convicted felon, after pleading guilty to obstruction of justice — is leaving the bench.

But he’s taking his sweet time about it:

U.S. District Judge Samuel Kent on Tuesday submitted his ”unconditional resignation,” which will take effect June 1, 2010.

Kent’s lawyer, Dick DeGuerin, says the judge decided to resign to avoid the ”spectacle” of an impeachment process by Congress. The House Judiciary Committee had scheduled a hearing on the matter for Wednesday.

Kent’s resignation announcement comes a week after denial of his request to retire on disability due to depression — which would have allowed him to continue receiving his full salary for the rest of his life.

Yes, that’s right — June 2010. What’s going on? Professor Jonathan Turley explains (gavel bang: commenter):

The date is designed to milk the system of as much benefits as possible — only to resign shortly before any completion of impeachment. Absent a voluntary resignation or impeachment, Kent can continue to receive his judicial salary.

Pretty pretty clever. Count on a federal judge to work the legal loopholes.

Judge Kent Resigns On Eve of Impeachment Hearing — Effective One Year From Now [Jonathan Turley]
Convicted Federal Judge Submits Resignation Letter [Associated Press]

Earlier: Prior ATL coverage of Judge Samuel B. Kent

When we first got a tip that a Florida lawyer had been disbarred for making a client pay her fees with sexual favors, we thought, “Ho hum. Another crazy Florida lawyer.” Then we Googled the pro boner attorney, James Harvey Tipler, and found out that the low-life lawyer has a sterling Stanford degree.

According to his Justia profile and his listing on the California Bar Association website, Tipler is a graduate of Yale University and Stanford Law School. We hope this doesn’t make Stanford fall even lower in the U.S. News rankings.

Tipler is not the first Stanford Law graduate to get mixed up in sex work. But making an 18-year-old client pay for legal work on her parental custody case with sexual favors is a new low.

From the Florida Supreme Court order disbarring Tipler:

Tipler charged his client a fee of $2,300 and entered into a fee agreement with her that allowed a “credit of $200 for each time she engaged in sex with Respondent” and a “$400 credit if she arranged for other females to have sex with him.” For his misdeeds, Tipler was charged with racketeering and four counts of prostitution. He ultimately pleaded guilty to one count of solicitation of prostitution.

Fellatio in exchange for filings was not Tipler’s only offense. He’s gotten into trouble in many other ways, and not just in Florida. He’s got a record in California and Alabama, and we suspect he may be trying to set up shop in South Carolina now. More after the jump.

Deidre Dare was our Lawyer of the Day Weekend back in January. Judging from the traffic on that post, we assume most of you know her story. If not, here are the quick and dirty details:

Dare, a Columbia Law grad, was a senior associate in Allen & Overy’s Moscow office. She was having fun expat adventures and decided to write about them in an online novella that included lots of alcohol, drugs, sex, donkeys, and dwarves. A&O was not a fan of one of its lawyers publishing porn online and made her stop writing it. Then, A&O fired her.

And the firm, unwisely perhaps, revealed exactly why it fired her (instead of just silently including her in the 10% layoff sweep, which resulted in the booting of many in the Moscow office, including Deidre’s Russian boyfriend). From a firm statement published by the Lawyer at the time:

Following our normal disciplinary process, we found that Ms Dare’s behaviour - in publishing the material she did in the professional name under which she practises, and the way that she has responded to a number of reasonable requests from us since - was unacceptable and totally at odds with the standards of behaviour that we expect from all of our people.

We’ve therefore terminated her employment.

Well, Deidre e-mailed us this morning with an update on her situation:

I know how you all love to hate me, so I thought you’d be interested in the following news!

Sex novelist lawyer Deidre Dare sues for being sacked

Obviously, Deidre doesn’t know us well, if she thinks we would hate a lawyer-turned-porn-writer. We couldn’t imagine much out there that we’d rather write about. While we wait for her to accept our Facebook friend request, we’ll tell you a bit more about what Deidre’s up to these days.

Hint: rather than legal memos, she’s penning lines like, “I am a dirty girl. I am dirty in bed and I’m happy to be dirty anywhere else if the need arises.”

Big news in from Minnesota. Remember the story of the female summer associates who got drunk and started making out last year at a firm event? We covered it in our end-of-the-year Biglaw Gossip In Review post. In that post, we wondered:

What happened to our fearless heroines after summer was over? We don’t know their fates. We reached out to them by email, but they did not respond to our queries. Did they land new jobs? It’s not clear.

It has become clearer. Apparently, the two 3Ls were among the many heading into life-after-law-school without job offers. So, like these University of Missouri-Kansas City grads, they’re going entrepreneurial and launching their own firm.

Will they be able to capitalize on their Above The Law fame? How are they getting their start-up cash? And more importantly, are they hiring?

More details, after the jump.

On Tuesday, U.S. District Judge Samuel Kent lost a motion to have his obstruction of justice charge dropped or moved to a different trial.

Today, he copped a plea and announced his intent to retire. According to the Wall Street Journal Law Blog:

The jurist pleaded guilty to one count of obstruction of justice today and retired from the bench, avoiding a trial on several charges that he sexually abused two female employees….

“Judge Kent believes that this settlement is in the best interest of all involved,” his attorney, Dick DeGuerin, said after this morning’s hearing. “A trial would have been long, embarrassing and difficult for all involved.”

Long and difficult? Sounds about right.

Update: Read more about Judge Kent’s fate over here.

Breaking News: Judge Kent Cops Plea, Resigns [WSJ Law Blog]
Judge Kent accepts plea deal and retires from bench [Houston Chronicle]

[Ed. note: We mentioned this briefly in Morning Docket. But any story involving the words “Cravath partner” and “hookers” deserves its own post.]

The late Deborah Jeane Palfrey, aka the “D.C. Madam,” has a New York counterpart. From ABC News (via our sibling site, DealBreaker):

Wall street lawyers, investment bankers, CEOs and media executives often used corporate credit cards to pay for $2,000 an hour prostitutes, according to the madam who ran one of New York’s biggest and most expensive escort services until it was busted last year.

But prosecutors in the Manhattan District Attorney’s office chose not to pursue any of the corporate titans, says Kristin Davis, who pleaded guilty last year to charges of running a prostitution business that used more than a hundred women.

Presumably no relation to actress Kristin Davis, who played squeaky-clean Charlotte York on Sex and the City. The actress is a brunette; the madam is a blonde (of course).

Among the names ABC News was able to confirm on [Davis’s client] list:

* a partner at the Wall Street law firm of Cravath Swaine Moore, “looking for a party girl to come fully equipped,” [who] spent a total of $20,000.

Finally — a plausible explanation for those disappointing Cravath bonuses. The money went to a different set of hourly billers.

We appreciate the CSM partner’s demand that his high-class escort arrive “fully equipped.” Cravath lawyers believe in the importance of preparation. Whether dealing with depositions or dealmaking, their motto is: “Be prepared.”

Just like the Boy Scouts. If Boy Scouts blew twenty grand on whores.

Given the prestige (and profitability) of Cravath, some might find this news shocking. But those in the know realize that the white-shoe law firm has a long and august history…. of sexual deviance and prostitute patronizing.

Some historical context, after the jump.

I know a lot of readers think we have an ax to grind with the University of Michigan Law School (even though we take pot shots at Head Coach Sweater Vest at every opportunity). We like Michigan. Maybe if more U-M Law students trusted that, a certain student would have come to ATL instead of the police. At least then she wouldn’t have been (immediately) charged with a crime for her involvement in a prostitution scandal that also implicated a U-M Near Eastern Studies professor:

The case came to light in April when the student went to an Ann Arbor police station to report she was assaulted by [Professor Yaron] Eliav after they met at a hotel on the city’s north side.

The student told police she was advertising sex acts online via Craigslist to help pay tuition costs. For an in-state student, U-M Law School tuition is $41,500 a year; out-of-state students pay $44,500.

The student told police she reluctantly agreed to allow Eliav to strike her buttocks with a belt, but got upset when he slapped her in the face twice, reports said. She said she suffered vision problems afterward, but did not have any lasting injuries.

Even the Ann Arbor police couldn’t keep from cracking wise about the law student’s
“term-time job.”

The rarity of how the case began - with a law student showing up at the police department’s front desk to report she was assaulted while committing a crime herself - was not lost on investigators.

“Perhaps she should have cracked a legal textbook before coming in to the police station to talk about this,” Ann Arbor Detective Sgt. Richard Kinsey said.

More fun details after the jump.