State Judges Are Clowns

  • RIP, Turk.

    Animal Law, Boalt Hall, Copyright, Crime, Environment / Environmental Law, Law Schools, Legal Ethics, Lunacy, Morning Docket, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns, Violence

    Morning Docket: 12.28.12

    * “I’m sorry Ms. Jackson, I am for real. Never meant to make your planet cry, I apologize a trillion times,” is likely what Barack Obama told Lisa Jackson when he found out she was stepping down as EPA administrator. [New York Times]

    * Cook County, Illinois, is experiencing problems wherein the kookiest of judges get “electoral mulligans” every six years. Public humiliation and harsh ratings might be a great way to finally put an end to this practice. [Chicago Magazine]

    * Another way to get revenge against the schools that screwed grads with their allegedly misleading employment stats: disciplinary action for ethical violations committed by those licensed to practice law. [WSJ Law Blog (sub. req.)]

    * What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas, unless you’re accused of being a murderer birderer. Boalt Hall law students Justin Teixeira and Eric Cuellar have now been criminally charged for their alleged roles in the decapitation of an exotic bird. [Las Vegas Sun]

    * Harvard Law is offering a free online copyright class, and anyone can enroll — even 13-year-olds. This may be your only chance to take a course at an Ivy League school, so hurry up and apply. [National Law Journal]

    * George Zimmerman and his lawyer are being sued by a private detective for failure to pay $27K for security services, which included a detailed escape plan to get the murder defendant into a hidey-hole. [Boston Herald]

    1 Comment / / Dec 28, 2012 at 9:16 AM
  • Fiscal-Cliff-300x256

    Attorney Misconduct, Barack Obama, Department of Justice, Federal Government, Guns / Firearms, Legal Ethics, Money, Morning Docket, Pictures, Politics, Prostitution, Reality TV, State Department, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns, Television, Violence

    Morning Docket: 12.17.12

    * “To do nothing in the face of pending disaster is to be complicit. It’s time to act. It’s time to vote.” What a convenient time to discover that the Department of Justice tabled new gun control proposals in favor of an upcoming election campaign. [New York Times]

    * Rumor has it that the president will nominate Senator John Kerry to be secretary of state for his second term. Upon hearing the news, Hillary Clinton updated her Tumblr page before she caught a case of the vapors, fainted, and got herself all concussed. [CNN]

    * “If you don’t know, then you have to plan for the worst.” Everyone’s pissed off about the possibility of being pushed off the fiscal cliff, but on the bright side, it’s creating a mountain of billables. [National Law Journal]

    * Remember the judge who resigned after he accidentally showed a colleague a picture of the “judicial penis”? He was removed from office by a judicial ethics panel. How very effective. [Seattle Post-Intelligencer]

    * And for the talent portion of the competition, Alicia Guastaferro, the pageant princess who was picked up for prostitution after getting caught with an attorney, will have her hooking charges dropped. [Huffington Post]

    0 Comments / / Dec 17, 2012 at 9:06 AM
  • stop rape sign

    California, Judge of the Day, Rape, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns

    Judge of the Day: Making Todd Akin-esque Comments on the Bench Won’t Earn You Any Praise, Even Four Years Later

    This California judge was making Todd Akin-esque comments about rape before Todd Akin was a joke.

    9 Comments / / Dec 14, 2012 at 12:53 PM
  • mccree RF

    Abortion, Attorney Misconduct, Bad Ideas, Divorce Train Wrecks, Judge of the Day, Pregnancy / Paternity, Rank Stupidity, Sex, Sex Scandals, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns

    Judge of the Day: A State Judge’s Alleged Affair and Baby Mama Drama Exposed — Via Incriminating Texts

    The Michigan judge who sent half-naked pictures of himself to a bailiff via text is now back in the news with some more scandalous (and sexy) allegations.

    23 Comments / / Dec 7, 2012 at 11:17 AM
  • bride holding a bouquet

    2nd Circuit, ACLU, Biglaw, China, Insider Trading, Law Schools, Morning Docket, Prisons, Religion, Sentencing Law, Solo Practitioners, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns, Student Loans, Weddings

    Morning Docket: 12.05.12

    * Mirror, mirror, on the wall, which is the fairest firm of them all? According to the 2012 Acritas Brand Index survey, the current leader of the Global 100 is the most powerful Biglaw brand for the fifth year in a row. [American Lawyer]

    * But that might not last for long, considering the dilemma Baker & McKenzie is facing when it comes to joining the Shanghai Bar Association in China. The firm is one of the first to indicate that it’ll take the plunge. [Wall Street Journal]

    * Thanks to the Second Circuit, Rajat Gupta will be a free man on bail pending the appeal of his insider trading conviction. We wonder what Benula Bensam would have to say about this new twist. [DealBook / New York Times]

    * Jason Smiekel, the lawyer who pleaded guilty in a murder-for-hire plot involving a former client, was sentenced to eight and a half years in federal prison. The things men will do for HHHBs. [Chicago Tribune]

    * Student loan payments: coming to a paycheck deduction near you! Congress is considering an overhaul of the country’s student debt collection practices, and Rep. Tom Petri has some interesting ideas. [Bloomberg]

    * The Cleveland-Marshall College of Law is the latest school to hop aboard the solo practice incubator train, but graduates will have to rent their office space from the school. Nice. /sarcasm [National Law Journal]

    * “We didn’t file this complaint lightly.” Sorry, Judge Norman, but as it turns out, you can’t just sentence a teenager to attend church for 10 years as a condition of parole without pissing off the ACLU. [Tulsa World]

    * When your alterations cost more than your wedding gown, it’s pretty much a given that you’ll have some problems — ones worth suing over, if you’re a true bridezilla (like moi). [Thomson Reuters News & Insight]

    3 Comments / / Dec 5, 2012 at 9:07 AM
  • Lawyer-of-the-Month

    Contests, Drugs, Kids, Lawyer of the Day, Marijuana, Reader Polls, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns, Women's Issues

    Lawyer of the Month: November Reader Poll

    Who will win the title of November’s Lawyer of the Month? Vote in our poll!

    1 Comment / / Dec 3, 2012 at 3:07 PM
  • XXX sign

    Attorney Misconduct, Bad Ideas, Judge of the Day, Legal Ethics, Pornography, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns

    A Former Judge of the Day Admits He’s Been ‘Addicted to Porn’ Since Childhood

    A state judge in Illinois admits that he’s addicted to porn, but will that save his career?

    13 Comments / / Dec 3, 2012 at 1:05 PM
  • Shakira

    Attorney Misconduct, Bad Ideas, Biglaw, Contracts, Law Schools, Legal Ethics, Money, Morning Docket, Music, Patents, Pornography, Real Estate, Shakira, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns, Technology

    Morning Docket: 12.03.12

    * When it comes to the art of law firm valuation, you may be surprised when you find out which Biglaw firm is worth the most. Here are a few hints: it’s not Baker & McKenzie, and it’s not DLA Piper or Skadden, either. [American Lawyer]

    * Remember back in July when this Judge of the Day was busying clicking on hardcore porn sites while in chambers? As it turns out, now he’s busy crying in court while battling to keep his judicial career intact. [Chicago Sun-Times]

    * Evening students are capable of doing more than ruining your class rank. Jacob Lew, once a night student at Georgetown Law, is now the White House chief of staff assisting with fiscal cliff negotiations. [New York Times]

    * For now, the only thing that’s keeping Florida from gaining another law school is a lack of square footage in the real estate rodeo. But that’s probably a good thing, because adding a twelfth law school would be more than a little ridiculous. [Daytona Beach News-Journal]

    * Samsung’s trying to get out of paying $1.05B to Apple, and their lawyers are trying to pin knowledge of the jury foreman’s misrepresentations on their technological nemesis to get the verdict thrown out. [Bloomberg]

    * Shakira’s hips don’t lie, but her contracts allegedly do. The sexy singer’s ex-business partner (who’s also her ex-boyfriend) is suing her for $100M to “recover his share of past and future partnership profits.” [Billboard]

    1 Comment / / Dec 3, 2012 at 9:07 AM
  • mike-norman RF

    Quote of the Day, Religion, Sentencing Law, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns

    Quote of the Day: Jesus Take the Wheel Stand

    This Oklahoma judge likes to sentence people to church attendance instead of jail. Is that even legal?

    13 Comments / / Nov 20, 2012 at 4:28 PM
  • inhouse-money

    Biglaw, Bonuses, BP, Federal Government, In-House Counsel, Money, Morning Docket, Sexism, Sexual Harassment, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns

    Morning Docket: 11.16.12

    * BP agreed to plead guilty to 14 charges and pay $4.5B in fines, but before going through with it, several Biglaw firms helped the company sell off assets to fund litigation- and spill-related costs. [Am Law Daily]

    * According to HBR Consulting, compensation for in-house attorneys has risen over the past year — including bonuses, which went up to $62,500. Sorry, but Biglaw isn’t following suit. [Corporate Counsel]

    * It’s better to leave well enough alone: Pryor Cashman was ordered to pay more than $21K in legal fees for filing a frivolous motion over its repeated attempts to dismiss a case. [New York Law Journal]

    * Judge Susan McDunn, who claimed that her “life [was] being ruined” by the secret lawsuits of many powerful Chicagoans, has resigned. Looks like her $182K salary wasn’t enough to buy crazy pills. [Chicago Tribune]

    * James T. Hayes Jr., the ICE agent who accused his superior of subjecting male employees to her “sexually offensive behavior,” settled his discrimination lawsuit against the government for $175,000. [Washington Post]

    1 Comment / / Nov 16, 2012 at 9:02 AM
  • change-all-the-thngs

    7th Circuit, American Bar Association / ABA, Bankruptcy, Barack Obama, Baseball, Deaths, Dewey & LeBoeuf, Disasters / Emergencies, Family Law, Federal Judges, Judicial Nominations, Law Schools, Morning Docket, Pro Bono, S.D.N.Y., State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns, Texas

    Morning Docket: 11.15.12

    * In a move to “end the vacancy crisis,” one week after being reelected, and one day after the Senate returned to session, Barack Obama nominated seven people for open seats on federal district courts, including two S.D.N.Y. slots. [Blog of Legal Times]

    * Dewey know how much the Los Angeles Dodgers will have to pay the now defunct firm for its work on the team’s Chapter 11 bankruptcy case? About $13M — the equivalent of their pitcher’s salary, or 62% of their first baseman’s pay. [WSJ Law Blog]

    * Which Biglaw firms in the Am Law 200 are the most LGBT friendly? Overall, of the 145 firms that participated in the Human Rights Campaign’s survey, 71 received perfect scores. Absolutely fabulous! [Am Law Daily]

    * The American Bar Association’s Task Force on the Future of Legal Education wants to know what should be done about law schools. This is a time to keep it simple, stupid: change EVERYTHING! [National Law Journal]

    * The New York Court of Appeals invoked the Major Disaster Rule for the first time ever, allowing out-of-state attorneys to perform pro bono services for Hurricane Sandy victims. [Thomson Reuters News & Insight]

    * William Adams, the Texas family court judge who got caught beating his daughter, returned to the bench yesterday after a year-long suspension. At least he won’t get physical abuse cases, anymore. [Fox News]

    * John Coffey, Senior Status Judge of the Court of Appeals for the Seventh Circuit, RIP. [Journal Sentinel]

    1 Comment / / Nov 15, 2012 at 9:02 AM
  • Cynthia Brim RF Judge Cynthia Brim

    Crime, Election 2012, Judge of the Day, Judicial Divas, Lunacy, Politics, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns

    ‘Legally Insane’ Judge Wins Re-Election in Chicago

    Remember Judge Cynthia Brim, the two-time Judge of the Day who was declared “legally insane” by a court-appointed psychiatrist? She just won re-election — before appearing in court hours later, not as a judge but as a defendant….

    16 Comments / / Nov 8, 2012 at 1:15 PM
  • Susan McDunn Judge Susan J McDunn RF

    Judge of the Day, Lesbians, Lunacy, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns, Weirdness

    Judges of the Day: Cook County Kookiness

    A state court judge claims her “life is being ruined” by secret lawsuits, while one of her colleagues is declared “legally insane” by a court-appointed psychiatrist.

    17 Comments / / Nov 5, 2012 at 2:25 PM
  • jack-skellington1

    Crime, Defamation, Facebook, Non-Sequiturs, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns

    Non-Sequiturs: 10.31.12

    * Paul Ceglia lost ANOTHER lawyer, this time after Ceglia got arrested on fraud charges. [Thomson Reuters News & Insight]

    * A Las Vegas family court judge has been charged with conspiracy, fraud, and money laundering, for allegedly devising and participating in a $3 million investment fraud scheme. So much for that whole “lest you be judged” thing. [8 News Now]

    * Hunter Moore, the patron saint of creepy revenge porn sites, has been sued by Storage Wars star Brandi Passante for defamation. [Los Angeles Intellectual Property Trademark Attorney Blog]

    * Speaking of creepy sex, happy Halloween!… unless you’re a registered sex offender. [ABA Journal]

    * This discrimination ruling may have established a new judicial precedent: the Jersey Shore test. God help us. [Legal Blog Watch]

    * Remember to send us pictures of your legally themed Halloween costumes for our contest! [Above the Law]

    2 Comments / / Oct 31, 2012 at 6:04 PM
  • angry-judge

    Drinking, DUI / DWI, Non-Sequiturs, Pregnancy / Paternity, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns

    Non-Sequiturs: 10.30.12

    * Did the lead plaintiff in the job stats suit against Thomas Jefferson School of Law turn down a law job offer? Does TJSL teach its students anything about discovery? [ABA Journal] * This judge may have a wee bit of an anger problem. [Legal Juice] * The Democratic activist who bailed the UVA Law […]

    3 Comments / / Oct 30, 2012 at 4:55 PM
  • nudity-prohibited-e1318524629766

    Abortion, Election 2012, Law Schools, Non-Sequiturs, Politics, Privacy, Rape, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns

    Non-Sequiturs: 10.24.12

    * Thomas Jefferson School of Law dean Rudy Hasl responded to those serious allegations of employment stat falsification by calling them a “crock of crap.” OK then! [ABA Journal]

    * All the Republicans claiming their flagrantly sexist, diabolically anachronistic comments were simply “misinterpreted” need to stop misinterpreting the word “misinterpret.” [The Fix / Washington Post]

    * BC Law appointed a professor specifically to help students deal with the “real world.” Not sure whether this is exciting or unbearably depressing. [WSJ Law Blog]

    * A judge who gets caught sending shirtless photos of himself to other government employees is serious business. Not taking said business seriously is even more serious business. [Detroit Free Press]

    * This new fashion blog is so offensive and it violates your privacy and it’s bad for America and I’m totally going to start reading it. [Not-So Private Parts / Forbes]

    * This man’s lawsuit claims Justin Bieber stole his credit card and used it to buy a penis enlargement, among several other weird purchases. No, ATLCommentBot, I am not the plaintiff in this case. Sorry to disappoint. [Consumerist]

    * A Seton Hall University Law School student saved an elderly woman’s life in dramatic fashion. Well done, sir. [Jersey Journal]

    4 Comments / / Oct 24, 2012 at 6:30 PM
  • Perhaps they meant this kind of Macho Man?

    Biglaw, Football, Gender, In-House Counsel, Kids, Law Schools, Money, Morning Docket, Sentencing Law, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns, Utah

    Morning Docket: 10.19.12

    * Congrats to Larren Nashelsky for being one bad ass MoFo. He’s taking over as Chair of Morrison & Foerster, and claims the firm’s had “some of [its] best years in recent years.” [San Francisco Business Times]

    * Macho, macho man! You’ve got to be, a macho man to work at Dechert. An ex-associate says he was fired for using FMLA time and blames the firm’s “macho culture” in his retaliation complaint. [National Law Journal]

    * Sorry, but you make too much damn money. Utah’s Judicial Conduct Commission recommended a judge for censure because his salary was “in excess of the amount allowed by law.” [Standard-Examiner]

    * “We’re all reacting to Darwinian pressures in the market and from students.” Maybe that’s why law schools are adding more classes having to do with careers as in-house counsel. [Corporate Counsel]

    * Jerry Sandusky has asked Judge John Cleland to reconsider his 30-60 year prison sentence because he thinks it’s excessive. Strange, because some people would argue it wasn’t excessive enough. [Bloomberg]

    2 Comments / / Oct 19, 2012 at 9:07 AM
  • penis-costume-e1337279480258

    Cellphones, Judge of the Day, Pictures, Screw-Ups, State Judges, State Judges Are Clowns, Technology

    Ex-Judge of the Day: Nobody Wants to See the ‘Judicial Penis’

    This ex-judge got in trouble for accidentally showing a colleague a photograph of the “‘judicial penis.”

    12 Comments / / Oct 10, 2012 at 3:20 PM

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