5th Circuit
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5th Circuit, Barack Obama, Crime, Election 2012, Fashion, Gay, Gay Marriage, Guns / Firearms, Nauseating Things, Non-Sequiturs, Police, Politics
Non-Sequiturs: 10.25.12
* The Fifth Circuit upheld a federal law banning gun sales to people under 21 years old. Oh! The humanity! What will the nation’s teenagers do without booze or their own guns? [WSJ Law Blog] * A New York cop is charged with planning to kidnap, cook, and eat 100 women. Gross. I wonder if this will tarnish the NYPD’s sterling reputation. [Daily Intel / New York Magazine] * Scratching your nuts in public is gross, but it’s not the same as, uh, some other grosser, more illegal activities. It would behoove this woman to learn to recognize the difference. [Legal Juice] * Should wearing “personality” glasses count against a criminal defendant? I dunno, but as a guy who has to wear glasses I find it bizarre that people choose to wear them as fashion accessories. Might as well wear a useless prosthetic arm too; I hear they’re the next hip trend. [Legal Blog Watch] * Another intra-family lawsuit: Geoffrey Richards, who teaches at Northwestern Law School, has been sued by his 95-year-old grandfather over a family financial dispute. The grandfather is also calling Richards a “scoundrel” and the “greatest disappointment” in his life. Ouch. [DealBreaker] * President Obama has endorsed several same-sex marriage ballot proposals. Nice work, Barry. [BuzzFeed] * Insights and advice for people interested in fashion law (from Ron Coleman and others). [Likelihood of Confusion] -
5th Circuit, Edith Jones, Federal Judges, Gay Marriage, Gender, Job Searches, Judicial Divas, Law Schools, Midsize Firms / Regional Firms, Money, Morning Docket, Patents, Paul Clement, Technology
Morning Docket: 09.28.12
* Chief Judge Edith Jones of the Fifth Circuit, the judicial diva herself, will be stepping down from her role at the head of the bench earlier than expected, due to “family issues.” Perhaps she told someone to “shut up” too many times? [Tex Parte Blog]
* Apple asked U.S. District Judge Lucy Koh to deny Samsung’s request that she bar all further communication with trial jurors, because the company claims it wants “equal access to information” (aka jury foreman Velvin Hogan). [Bloomberg]
* “[T]here’s no way to preserve the definition of marriage [as one man and one woman] other than by preserving the definition. It becomes somewhat circular.” That, and you rely on law from 1885. Argh! [BuzzFeed]
* ASU Law wants to move from Tempe to Phoenix, and to make it financially feasible, the school may increase enrollment and raise tuition. Sound like a good idea, prospective law students cash cows? [Arizona Republic]
* Now compare/contrast: Stanford Law had to dip into its coffers to come up with the cash to cover its financial aid promises this year, but the school isn’t cutting out a dime that’s owed to students. [National Law Journal]
* Massachusetts appealed the Michelle Kosilek sex-change ruling. The state claims it provided “adequate medical care,” but it’s questionable whether that was the case if the prisoner tried to castrate herself. [CNN]
* Tully Rinckey, a midsize firm, is planning to open an office in Buffalo, New York, so it sent out recruitment letters to 5,469 attorneys in the region. Unemployed law grads: open the letter, it’s not a bill! [Buffalo News]
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5th Circuit, American Bar Association / ABA, Biglaw, Chadbourne & Parke, Department of Justice, Dewey & LeBoeuf, Election 2012, Election Law, Football, Legal Ethics, LSAT, Morning Docket, Real Estate, Texas
Morning Docket: 09.07.12
* It seems that the good people at Chadbourne & Parke won’t wind up homeless after all — or maybe they will. The firm is taking over Dewey’s old digs at 1301 Avenue of the Americas. How ominous! [Reuters]
* The Fifth Circuit gave Texas a stay on a decision that blocked enforcement of the state’s third-party voter registration law. Well, on the bright side, at least the Lone Star state isn’t getting its ass completely kicked in the courts this election season. [Bloomberg]
* While Jerry Sandusky awaits his sentencing on 45 counts of child sexual abuse, his attorney Joe Amendola is contemplating grounds for an appeal. Seriously? It seems to be time for yet another 1-800-REALITY check, my friend. [Centre Daily Times]
* Remember the Texas family law judge who got caught beating his daughter in a viral video? An ethics panel issued him a “public warning” as punishment — he didn’t even get a reprimand. Sigh. [Houston Chronicle]
* The DOJ has asked for permission to intervene in a class-action suit against LSAC that alleges an epic fail on organization’s part when it comes to accommodating LSAT exam takers with disabilities. [WSJ Law Blog]
* Bucky Askew, a former adviser to the ABA Section of Legal Education and Admissions to the Bar, has moved on to bigger and better things. He’s now a trustee of the National Conference of Bar Examiners. [ABA Journal]
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5th Circuit, Copyright, Defamation, Dewey & LeBoeuf, Facebook, Guns / Firearms, Intellectual Property, Morning Docket
Morning Docket: 06.22.12
* Dewey still have some folks who owe us money? Yes we do. [WSJ Law Blog]
* Facebook will change its terms of service, specifically regarding the way it handles “sponsored stories” in order to settle a large lawsuit [Thomson Reuters News & Insight]
* A man opposing a Virginia attorney in a child custody hearing shot at the lawyer outside the courthouse. Luckily, he missed. [Gettysburg Times]
*The Fifth Circuit said yes, the law firm of Smith & Fuller is on the hook for $30,000 for accidentally releasing its client’s secret information. [ABA Journal]
* Recently released interviews with George Zimmerman tell his side of the death of Trayvon Martin. [New York Times]
*The Electronic Frontier Foundation is stepping in represent Matthew Inman, creator of The Oatmeal and the defendant in this mess. [Electronic Frontier Foundation]
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5th Circuit, Prisons, Religion, Texas, Weirdness
Vampire High Priest Loses Religious Civil Rights Case
A vampire high priest lost a civil rights case on appeal to the Fifth Circuit. No, it didn't happen on an episode of True Blood... -
5th Circuit, 9/11, Abortion, Biglaw, Dewey & LeBoeuf, Food, Law Schools, Morning Docket, Prostitution, SCOTUS, Sex, Sex Scandals, Student Loans, Supreme Court, Texas
Morning Docket: 05.07.12
* While Dewey’s former culture gets roasted on a spit, and the seemingly unending drama gets turned into a montage of living lawyer jokes, we’re still waiting for the final punchline. [New York Times; Wall Street Journal]
* Don Verrilli tried so hard, and got so far (depending on who you ask), but in the end, it doesn’t even matter. When Linkin Park lyrics apply to your oral argument skills, you know you’re kind of screwed. [New York Times]
* The 9/11 arraignments went off without a hitch this weekend. And by that, we mean that it was a 13 hour hearing filled multiple interruptions, and grandstanding about “appropriate” courtroom fashion. [Fox News]
* In a “re-re-reversal,” Judge Jerry Smith, on a three-judge panel of the Fifth Circuit, reinstated Planned Parenthood’s injunction against Texas, without even so much as a homework assignment. [Dallas Observer]
* The It Gets Worse Project: if you thought that the Law School Transparency debt figures were scary before, then take a look at them now. Six figures of debt just got a lot harder to swallow. [National Law Journal]
* Scalia gets busted on a case of hot-dog hooking. No, not that Scalia. A woman from Long Island has been accused, for the second time, of selling swallowing foot-longs in the back of her food truck. [New York Post]
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5th Circuit, Clerkships, Department of Justice, Federal Government, Federal Judges, Job Searches
Want to Clerk for the Judge Who Took on Obama?
Interested in clerking on the Fifth Circuit for the controversial Judge Jerry Smith? There's something you should know.... -
5th Circuit, Barack Obama, Benchslaps, Constitutional Law, Department of Justice, Election 2012, Eric Holder, Federal Government, Federal Judges, Health Care / Medicine, Judicial Divas, Politics
Attorney General Eric Holder Responds to Judge Jerry Smith's Homework Assignment
Attorney General Eric Holder has filed his reply to the Fifth Circuit's "homework assignment" -- a single-spaced, three-page letter discussing judicial review. What did he have to say? - Sponsored
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Barack Obama, Biglaw, California, Department of Justice, Dewey & LeBoeuf, Eric Holder, Facebook, Fast Food, Food, Law Schools, Morning Docket, Partner Issues, Texas
Morning Docket: 04.05.12
* “I think that you know what the president said … was appropriate.” While the DOJ scrambles to meet Judge Smith’s memo deadline, Attorney General Eric Holder is busy defending Obama’s con law faux pas. [CNN]
* Six more partners have fled from Dewey & LeBoeuf, bringing the grand total of partner defections to at least 46 since January. Good Lord, somebody needs to get this firm a freakin’ tourniquet. [Wall Street Journal]
* Facebook filed a motion to dismiss Paul Ceglia’s ownership claims, but he isn’t going anywhere soon. Ceglia’s got two months to submit expert reports as to the authenticity of his fake contract. [Associated Press]
* Joe Jamail, America’s richest practicing lawyer, donated his $3M law library to TSU’s Thurgood Marshall School of Law. Now students can learn more so they don’t have to sue over being graded on a curve. [Fox]
* McDonald’s doesn’t have to worry about its G-rated Happy Meal toys in California anymore. It’s that XXX-rated lawsuit over a former employee’s “Filet-O-Fish” that the company’s really got to keep an eye on. [Reuters]
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5th Circuit, Barack Obama, Benchslaps, Constitutional Law, Department of Justice, Election 2012, Federal Government, Federal Judges, Health Care / Medicine, Judicial Divas, Politics
Benchslap of the Day: Fifth Circuit Orders DOJ To Write 'We Respect Judicial Review' in Three-Page Letter
The nation recently received a lesson in constitutional law from President Barack Obama. The problem with this lesson: it wasn't exactly accurate. One prominent conservative jurist, Judge Jerry E. Smith of the Fifth Circuit, took it upon himself to set the record straight.... -
5th Circuit, Barack Obama, Biglaw, Canada, Dewey & LeBoeuf, Eric Holder, Gloria Allred, Law Schools, Money, Morning Docket, Murder
Morning Docket: 04.04.12
* AG Eric Holder can thank Obama for this homework assignment from Fifth Circuit Judge Jerry Smith, because it seems like our president, a former con law professor, forgot about Marbury v. Madison. [CBS News]
* Dewey need to buy this Biglaw firm a functional calculator? New information shows that the imploding firm was off by roughly $153M when partners reported 2011 earnings to the American Lawyer. [Am Law Daily]
* You know there’s got to be something questionable about a law school when the accreditation machine that is the ABA gives it the side eye. And no, Duncan Law, a judge still won’t force its hand. [National Law Journal]
* Stephen McDaniel pleaded not guilty at his arraignment for the murder of Mercer Law classmate Lauren Giddings, but will he be released on bail before trial? Only if he’s got $2.5M sitting around. [Macon Telegraph]
* More law school lawsuits are coming down the pipeline, but local lawyers in Massachusetts don’t think that they stand a chance. Why? The highly-educated consumer argument strikes again. [Boston Business Journal]
* Thanks to Gloria Allred, transgender beauty queen Jenna Talackova may be able to participate in the Miss Universe pageant if she can meet the legal requirements for being a woman in Canada. [MSNBC]
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5th Circuit, Affirmative Action, Election 2012, SCOTUS, Supreme Court, Texas
SCOTUS Grants Cert in Affirmative Action Case: 'Cause It's an Election Year and They Like Power'
Last year, the Fifth Circuit upheld the University of Texas's affirmative action plan in Fisher v. University of Texas. But they did so in a petulant, childish manner, as if somebody was forcing them to eat their vegetables. At the time, Elie said they were openly begging for a right-wing Supreme Court to review and overturn their ruling. It looks like the members of the Fifth Circuit are going to get their wish. The Supreme Court granted cert on Fisher, and now we get to have an affirmative action debate right in the middle of an election cycle where a black man is running for reelection.... -
5th Circuit, Ann Althouse, Barack Obama, Books, Clerkships, Depositions, Drinking, Drugs, Fat People, Gay, Lesbians, Nauseating Things, Non-Sequiturs, Politics
Non-Sequiturs: 01.05.12
* Pepsi lawyers offer a creative (if disturbing) defense to a lawsuit by a man who claims he found a mouse in his Mountain Dew. [Madison County Record via The Atlantic Wire] * Will birther queen Orly Taitz get to depose — i.e., “rupture the jurisprudential hymen” — of President Barack Obama? That would be […]
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Non-Sequiturs
Non-Sequiturs: 11.07.11
* Professor Glenn Reynolds notes Lindsay Lohan’s swift movement through the jail system. [Instapundit] * Professor Orin Kerr notes Professor Stephen Higginson’s swift movement onto the Fifth Circuit — in apparent violation of the rule in judicial nominations “that a circuit court nominee with Supreme-Court-level credentials will have a harder time getting confirmed than a […] -
5th Circuit, Abortion, California, Clarence Thomas, Law Professors, Loyola Law School, Morning Docket, New Jersey, Pregnancy / Paternity, Reality TV, Supreme Court Clerks, Trendspotting
Morning Docket: 11.02.11
* “Rising tuition. Misleading employment statistics. Inadequate skills training.” So what are legal educators doing about it? Blogging, of course. [Law School Review] * Trendspotting: cute judges on the federal bench? The Senate has confirmed Loyola Law professor Stephen Higginson for a seat on the Fifth Circuit. [National Law Journal] * People in New Jersey […]
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5th Circuit, Benchslaps, Contests, D. Marvin Jones, Edith Jones, Law Professors, Lawyer of the Day, Murder, Prostitution, Reader Polls, Sex, Sex Scandals, Wall Street
Lawyer of the Month: September Reader Poll
Our candidates for the coveted Lawyer of the Month title have been a bit tame for the past few months. This time around, we’ve chosen some lawyers and law students who represent our more prurient interests and our unabashed love for scandal. Aficionados of hookers? We’ve got ’em. Vicious tongue lashings? We’ve got those, too. […] -
5th Circuit, Benchslaps, Edith Jones, Federal Judges, Judicial Divas, Reader Polls, Ridiculousness, Rudeness, Sam Sparks, Texas, Vicious Infighting
Judicial Diva Gone Wild? Chief Judge Jones Tells Judge Dennis to 'Shut Up'
Can you enforce civility by being... uncivil? That's the question being raised, over and over again, by federal judges from Texas these days. Check out the latest craziness -- an en banc hearing before the Fifth Circuit that generated judicial fireworks, culminating in a judge essentially telling a colleague to STFU or GTFO.... -
5th Circuit, Attorney Misconduct, Benchslaps, Edith Jones, Federal Judges, Judicial Divas, Rudeness, Sam Sparks, Texas, Vicious Infighting
Benchslap of the Day: Judge Sparks Gets a Taste of His Own Medicine
The benchslapper has become the benchslapped. Judge Sam Sparks, of the U.S. District Court for the Western District of Texas, just got smacked around by a higher authority: Chief Judge Edith Jones, of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Fifth Circuit. What did she have to say to Sparks? -
5th Circuit, Benchslaps, Civil Rights, Ridiculousness, Texas
Benchslap of the Day: Shouldn't Cheerleaders Know How to Spell?
Judge Jerry Smith of the Fifth Circuit had some harsh words about a cheerleading-related litigation: "[T]his is nothing more than a dispute, fueled by a disgruntled cheerleader mom, over whether her daughter should have made the squad. It is a petty squabble, masquerading as a civil rights matter, that has no place in federal court or any other court." -
5th Circuit, Education / Schools, Federal Judges, Free Speech, Judge of the Day, Religion, Texas
A Judge of the Day, Back in the News: Fred Biery
Three years ago, we bestowed Judge of the Day honors upon the Honorable Fred Biery, a federal judge in the Western District of Texas. Back in 2008, Judge Biery rejected a religious school’s attempt to join an influential statewide extracurricular organization. In the process of ruling against Cornerstone Christian Schools, Judge Biery took the Bible […]