They had to know. But the attitude was sort of, ‘If you’re doing something wrong, we don’t want to know.’
- Barry Bonds, Baseball, Celebrities, Immigration, Lindsay Lohan, Morning Docket, Prisons, Sports, Tobacco / Smoking
* Lindsay Lohan took to Twitter to announce that she “was not raised to lie, cheat, or steal.” Well, nature it is. [msnbc.com]
* Arizona is suing the federal government over the porous border. Mr. Obama, build us a wall! [Reuters]
* Barry Bonds, he of the enormous dome piece, had the number of felony charges against him dropped to five. Hauling that gargantuan cranium about. I’m not kidding, that boy’s head is like Sputnik. [ESPN]
* Mario will mediate the Madoff / Mets mess. [New York Post]
I’ve been avoiding writing about Irving Picard, the trustee in charge of getting money for the victims of the Bernie Madoff Ponzi scheme, and his lawsuit against New York Mets owners Fred Wilpon and Saul Katz. It’s too painful. It’s like being close enough to see Oliver Perez’s face just as you know things are going to completely unravel but still hoping against hope that he’ll throw a strike. It’s like wondering if David Wright spends his nights crying softly while Mike Piazza texts him weekly updates on how many days he has until he’s an unrestricted free agent. I know what’s happening; I just don’t like to talk about it.
But, as we mentioned in Morning Docket, Picard’s massive complaint was made public today. He says Wilpon and Katz made $300 million in fictitious profits from business dealings with Madoff.
As you read through the allegations, try to remember how poorly the Wilpons make decisions about whom to hire, whom to fire, and how much to play baseball players — and then tell me if you are at all surprised by anything here…
Being married to a Paul Weiss partner is nice; getting divorced from a Paul Weiss partner is even nicer. Thanks to the prestigious firm’s eye-popping profits, getting divorced from a PW partner should give you a seven-figure payday (assuming the Paul Weiss partner has been a partner for a while and is the “monied spouse” — a pretty safe assumption, unless you work at, say, Goldman Sachs).
But when you get that gigantic payment — like winning the lottery, but without all the taxes — can you feel confident in its finality? Or do you have to worry that your ex-spouse, a partner at a firm known for its aggressive and brilliant lawyering, will find a clever way to get some of that money back from you, years later?
Consider the tale of Steven Simkin, a Paul Weiss partner of almost three decades, and his ex-wife Laura Blank, who works in education. It involves a multimillion-dollar marital estate, residential properties in Manhattan and the tony suburb of Scarsdale, and an investment account with one Bernie Madoff.
And yes, for your voyeuristic pleasure, the tale comes with hard numbers, lots of numbers…
Rack up another win for trustee Irving Picard, the partner at Baker Hostetler who’s cleaning up the Bernard Madoff mess. On Friday, Picard and Preet Bharara, the headline-making U.S. attorney for the Southern District of New York, announced a $7.2 billion settlement with the estate of Jeffry Picower (no it’s not spelled “Jeffrey”).
Picower, a successful investor and prominent philanthropist, earned billions — both real, through investing with Goldman Sachs, and fictional, through investing with Madoff — before he died in October 2009. Picower was found dead in the swimming pool of his home in Palm Beach, apparently after suffering a heart attack (a plot device familiar to viewers of Brothers & Sisters and The OC). If he had held on until January 2010, Picower would have avoided the estate tax.
Of the $7.2 billion settlement, $5 billion will go to Picard, to settle the complaint he filed against Picower in bankruptcy court, and $2.2 billion will go to the Department of Justice — the largest civil forfeiture payment in U.S. history. All of this money will eventually find its way to qualifying Madoff victims.
Based on monies collected to date, what kind of recovery might Madoff’s victims be looking at?
* A lawyer named Conn created a 3D commercial for potential clients. Too bad his target audience will be purchasing new hips before 3D televisions. [Florida Times-Union]
* “And then I felt a sharp jabbing pain into my rectum.” That’s what she said. Actually, that’s what he said. What’s with the NYPD and sodomy? [Wall Street Journal]
* Another day, another “Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell” lawsuit. Yes, I just totally dropped a DADT bomb after a story about sodomy. I went there, that happened. [Washington Post]
* You better not question Rahmbo’s amended 2009 tax return. He will f**king end you. You will never even see it coming, motherf**ker. [NBC Chicago]
* I ❤ boobies, you ❤ boobies, but this school thinks that they’re lewd. Come on, even the New York Times ❤s boobies. [Legal Intelligencer]
* Time to find a new fetish to deposit in your spank banks, sickos, because animal crush videos have been banned (again). [CNN Politics]
* Despite Mark Madoff’s suicide, Irving Picard still
has him on a short leash is pursuing litigation against the Madoffs. All clawback lawsuits against the family will continue to move ahead. [Wall Street Journal]
Mark Madoff, the oldest of Bernard Madoff’s two sons, committed suicide on Saturday, by hanging himself in his Manhattan apartment. Saturday was a significant day: the second anniversary of Bernie Madoff’s arrest for running a multibillion-dollar Ponzi scheme.
Mark Madoff’s lawyer, prominent Paul Weiss partner Martin Flumenbaum, issued a statement yesterday: “Mark Madoff took his own life today. This is a terrible and unnecessary tragedy…. [Mark Madoff was] an innocent victim of his father’s monstrous crime who succumbed to two years of unrelenting pressure from false accusations and innuendo.”
Flumenbaum wasn’t the only powerful Paul Weiss personage named “Martin” with involvement in this case. Mark Madoff’s body was actually found by legendary litigator Martin London, a longtime partner at the firm who is now of counsel at PW.
As noted on his Paul Weiss website bio, “[t]he gamut of Mr. London’s successes is vast.” But his experience is primarily on the civil side, with occasional forays into white-collar criminal work. His docket generally doesn’t include violence and death; he’s not the kind of lawyer who sees dead people (e.g., a homicide prosecutor).
So how did Marty London come to find Mark Madoff’s body?
Judge Denny Chin said that the sentence was necessary to deter other people from entering into these kinds of schemes.
The Judge apparently said that he was struck that there was no letter written in support of Bernie Madoff. On the other hand, the judge received 141 pages of letters from Madoff victims.
Madoff allegedly said:
They have accused me and my wife of not being sympathetic. She cries every night, I am also tormented.
Umm … crying doesn’t make you sympathetic. I think instead of turning on the waterworks, Madoff should try not stealing billions of dollars.
But Madoff did apparently say: “I am sorry.”
But the pitchfork rally doesn’t have to end here. Next up: what prison will Madoff be heading to? A “club-fed” facility, or someplace where Madoff might expect “more bareback.”
For extensive and ongoing coverage of L’Affaire Madoff, surf over to our sister site, Dealbreaker.